by Virna DePaul
“Kayla, first of all, you’re beautiful and sexy as you are. And second, screw that guy.” Dom’s voice was harsh and full of protection. “You should always be yourself.”
“I don’t know if I’ve ever really known who I was,” I said, surprised that I was being so open and honest with two guys I still barely knew, despite how close I felt to them. These were admissions I’d never shared with anyone. “I feel like I’ve always been trying to figure out where I fit in and I’ve been pretending to be whoever I needed to be to fit in there.”
They both listened like my words were the only sound in the entire restaurant, like they needed to catch every syllable just to survive.
“And well, I’m starting to think I’ve had it backward. I need to figure out who I am, who I want to be, and then finding where I belong will all fall into place.”
Tentatively, I reached out, placing one of my hands on Dom’s and one on Taylor’s. “The thing is…I’ve only known you a few days, but you’re helping me figure out who I am. Who I want to be. And I can’t thank you enough for that.”
In perfect synch, they each turned their hands to entwine their fingers with mine.
“You’re finding out who you are all on your own, Kayla,” Taylor said.
“Right. We just get the honor of witnessing it. And it’s a damn beautiful sight,” Dom said.
After a great meal and several glasses of wine, we walked outside. I enjoyed the evening breeze and the happy full feeling in my tummy after a delicious meal. We slowly made our way to the parking lot, and when Taylor hung back a moment to check something on his phone, Dom suddenly pulled me in for a hug. Having his warm, scrumptious body pressed against mine felt so good, I almost swooned.
My arms wrapped around him, and I enjoyed the embrace.
“You know back in the restaurant,” he whispered, “that moment when you were talking about finding yourself, finding what you want for yourself?”
I shifted my head so I could see his dark eyes that gazed down at me softly. “Yes?”
“I think you’re very brave,” he continued, and I sensed him growing embarrassed at his vulnerability. “And, well, I think I haven’t been that brave in a long time.”
I started to protest, but he shook his head.
“No, no, it’s true,” he insisted. “But you make me want to be.”
We stared into each other’s eyes and I knew he could see me. I wondered if someday he would let me see him, the real Dom.
Kissing my cheek lightly, he said, “I’m gonna take off.”
“You are?” I asked, surprised that he’d be leaving so abruptly after our intimate moment together.
“Yeah. Been a long day. Taylor will take you home.” He pulled back, and for a second I thought he would kiss me, but instead he wrapped his hands around my face. “I had a great time, Kayla. Thank you for letting us take you out.”
“Thank you for taking me out. I haven’t had this much fun in a long time.”
He smiled then moved to his bike and straddled it. He threw on his helmet, looking sexy as fuck before revving the engine and taking off.
I wanted him so badly and was still shaky from the near-kiss encounter when Taylor stepped up and tugged on my pinky finger. “Ready to head home?” he asked.
Not really. The night was young and I wanted to spend it with both of them, but only Taylor was here, so I focused on getting to know him and only him. “Let’s go,” I said.
We climbed into his car and chatted easily on the way home. The closer we got to my house, however, the quieter I became. It wasn’t so much nerves as anticipation.
I knew something was going to happen between us once we got back to the house. I was just a little confused why Dom had seemingly stepped aside to let Taylor have first dibs, so to speak. Was it because of what happened with Laura? For all his macho broodiness, did he really doubt that I could want him every bit as much as I wanted Taylor? If that was the case, I was going to have to disabuse him of that notion, and very soon. But right now, Dom wasn’t here.
I looked at Taylor.
He deserved my focus and attention right now. Every bit as much as I wanted his focus and attention on me.
Taylor pulled to a halt inside my driveway and turned off the car. I glanced up at Tabitha’s house—my house—quiet and dark, sitting there in the night like a promise waiting to be fulfilled. Taylor turned in his seat to face me.
I wasn’t sure who leaned in first, but it didn’t matter at this point.
His hand slipped behind my neck, pulling me in, his warm tongue filling my mouth, and I felt something akin to a wave of relief. How long had I been waiting for one of them to kiss me like this? Why had I waited so long to figure out what I wanted?
I let out a little moan against his lips, and his hand slid over my leg, up my thigh, gripping me, holding me, touching me. I couldn’t get enough of him—of Taylor Riggs kissing me, making me want him.
I wasn’t sure how long we were in his car, in the dark, outside my house, making out like a couple of teenagers. His hands explored my body, appreciating the thickness of my hips, legs, and breasts. When I pressed my hand against his chest, I felt his heart pick up pace under my fingers.
Eventually, he drew back, breath coming fast, eyes darkened. “We don’t have to rush this,” he murmured. “No expectations, no pressure, remember? Dom and I really did just want to take you out to dinner.”
I grinned widely. “So are you saying it wouldn’t faze you at all to walk away from me now?”
“Fuck no. It would be difficult as hell.” Taking my hand, he brought it to his crotch, and I could feel just how difficult it would actually be. He was so big. So hard for me. I rubbed him lightly, and he groaned.
“So maybe you shouldn’t be so quick to give me space,” I said.
He caught my wrist, stopping my caresses but keeping my hand pressed against him. “I’ll always give you what you need, Kayla, even if that’s for me to walk away.”
“Well, I don’t want or need you to walk away.”
“You sure?”
It felt like a lifetime since I’d actually wanted someone as badly as this, since someone had wanted and desired me in the way that he did. And the intensity of my desire was making me a little drunk. “I’m sure. I want you, Taylor. Please.”
In seconds, he’d helped me out of the car and had me scooped up in his arms, making me giggle as I leaned up against his chest and inhaled his scent. It was so quiet out here at this time of night, so easy to pretend that we were the only two people in the entire world out underneath the amazing stars.
He kicked the door open, which made me gasp. For one stupid moment, I’d forgotten how rotted the damn thing was, but then I laughed out loud.
“I’m fixing it tomorrow, anyway,” he said, shutting it behind him with his boot.
All I wanted was him, this night, this moment, this instant.
He set me down and made his way up the stairs, tugging me behind him. Once we got to my room, he said, “I’ve wanted to do this to you from the first moment I laid eyes on you.” His voice was low and growly, making my heart pound and my panties go wet.
I collapsed on my bed and he came down next to me, kissing me deeply and slipping his hand between my legs, cupping my pussy through my panties and making me sigh with relief. His hand was so strong, fingers so warm against me, I could hardly take it. Yes, I wanted to say, wanted to tell him that I’d thought about it too long.
But I couldn’t speak.
I wrapped my arms around his neck and held him close as he deftly inched my underwear down my legs until I was bare to him. I parted my legs and hooked them around him, grinding against him, feeling the hardness of his cock again. Aside from taking my hand and pressing it against him earlier, he’d been the perfect gentleman. I liked that he had a little dirty in him, too. I needed that dirty—dirty combined with good-boy charm. It was what had defined him for me when we first met. That mischievous spark in his personali
ty.
He kissed down my neck, and his warm breath in the cold of the house made me shudder with need. I pushed myself against him, hungry for more, and he understood what I needed. He pressed his fingers against my clit, holding them there for a second, letting me get used to the feel and pressure. Pulling back, he looked into my eyes, and for a moment, I felt as though I was paralyzed by the way he watched me. I could only lie there, holding on to him for dear life, as though he were the only thing keeping me connected to the real world.
And maybe he was.
He began to move his fingers slowly. I mashed my lips together and lost myself to the rhythm. Slowly, torturing me, he moved his fingers, his caresses considerate and sweet, in no rush at all. I tried to remember the last time someone had touched me like this and came up completely blank. My other boyfriends had always gone at me like they were hurrying to get me there already and wanted nothing more than for me to just be ready for them to fuck.
But Taylor touched me as though he’d be happy doing nothing but that all night long. I loved the way he moved his hand against me, his fingers tracing slow, soft circles over my clit, before he slid them a little lower down and dipped the tip of one inside of me. My mouth dropped open as he slipped his finger all the way in, his thumb twisting around to caress me as he did so.
“Oh, god,” I breathed, and he leaned down to kiss me again.
I couldn’t tell what was turning me on more—his deep kisses or his touch—or the combination of both. It was a recipe for my undoing. The sensations, from his hand between my legs and his mouth on mine, were flooding my body with feeling I didn’t know what to do with.
I lifted my hips to rock back and forth against him, building up a pace against his hand and letting him push that finger deep inside me. No matter how good it felt, all it was doing was making me needier for more and more Taylor. I pressed my lips boldly against his neck and grinned to myself when I heard his sharp intake of breath.
So it wasn’t just me feeling this deep need.
“Jesus,” Taylor growled, his voice low and lush. We kissed again and stayed like that for a long while, him teasing me with the promise of his fingers inside of me, until I felt my toes curl and my muscles tense. I realized I was getting close.
“Oh…” I groaned, tipping my head back.
He gripped my hair in his hand and bared his teeth against my neck and I came, hard, my body wracked with pleasure as I convulsed beneath him. I wasn’t sure if I even made any noise—my brain was too filled up with the shock of how good it felt—but when my ears tuned back in and my mind returned to normal, I could hear his breath coming quick and heavy, faster than before.
“I need to be inside you,” he murmured against my ear, letting his teeth drag briefly over my earlobe. His words drew another moan of pleasure out of me, and I knew I was helpless to stop this. Not that I wanted to. Briefly, I remembered that fantasy I’d had when I’d first seen their images on their web site—both of them in this bed, touching me and caressing me and fucking me, and I felt another surge of arousal build.
“Fuck me,” I begged him, and he didn’t need telling twice. He dipped into the pocket of his jeans and pulled out a condom. I couldn’t help but giggle—had it really been that obvious where this night was going when he was getting ready? It didn’t have to be obvious, I chastised myself. Just enough that he was ready.
“Stand up,” he ordered firmly.
I quickly did as I was told, and his hands reached down, tugged up at my dress and lifted it over my head. Unbidden, Grant’s words about my body suddenly surfaced, and I ducked under the covers.
“Where do you think you’re going?” he chuckled, taking off his shirt. Finally, I saw his bare chest, exactly as I’d pictured it. So smooth and rippling with toned muscle. When he stood and dropped his jeans, I could’ve had my second orgasm right then, but I watched with fascination as he climbed between the covers with me.
I was about to say that one of us wasn’t completely naked when he cupped my face in his hands and kissed me again. “Listen. Don’t ever hide from me. You’re fucking gorgeous, Kayla.”
And then he let out a groan as he ran his hand over my bare hip and up my waist, coming to a stop on my breast. Squeezing, he pushed it into his mouth and sucked so hard, I cried out loud.
“Fuck, you feel so good,” I gasped.
His sucking turned to licking and biting my nipple softly, reining in his deepest urges.
I pulled at his boxers. “I think these need to go.” I remarked, biting my lip.
“Point taken,” he murmured, kneeling on the bed to slide down his boxers.
It was dark in the room, but from his silhouette, I could tell that Taylor Riggs was an endowed man. He quickly tore open the condom and sheathed himself, then rolled on top of me and kissed me once more. I couldn’t get enough of the taste of him, of how good he felt on top of me, and I parted my legs eagerly and drew him in toward my body.
His cock pressed up against the entrance to my pussy, and I knew then it was going to be the biggest challenge I’d ever had. Thank god I was so incredibly wet. Slowly, he eased himself inside.
I groaned. He felt better than I ever could have expected. The feeling was…it was something more than simply the physical pleasure of it, something that ran darker and deeper than that. He wasn’t just fucking me—he was fulfilling me, owning me. He moved his mouth over mine softly as he pushed himself up to the hilt in my pussy, and I squeezed my eyes shut and focused on committing this moment to memory.
He began to move, slowly at first, as though letting me get used to the full sensation of him inside of me, but I wrapped my legs around him and drew him in deeper. I wanted him to go further. I wanted to let him know that he didn’t need to treat me with kid gloves. I may have taken a while to warm up, but now I was ready. Now, I was his match.
He read my intentions easily and at once, and soon enough we had built up a pace, him moving hard into me as I pushed my hips back up to meet him every time. Neither of us said a word—neither of us had to. Everything we needed to say was spoken with our bodies, in the way we seemed to fit together like a pair of jigsaw puzzle pieces.
I focused on the sound of our breathing, mingling together in the quietness and the darkness of the air around us, and allowed my mind to turn to mush as I gave over to the pleasure that being with Taylor was giving me. He moved his hands all over my body as he fucked me, as though taking me all in, as though this is what he’d been thinking about the whole time he’d been working on the house.
For a moment, I imagined if Dominic were here, how this would be with both of them fucking me, one cock in my pussy and one in my mouth, and I nearly came to the brink again.
“Fuck, you feel so good,” Taylor moaned in my ear, bringing me back to this moment and this man. I flushed at the realization that thinking about Dominic had been getting me hotter than ever. I was close again, the motion of Taylor’s cock in my pussy enough to get my toes curling and my body hungry and horny and fucking desperate to come.
“Fuck,” he moaned again.
I loved the way he spoke to me when he was inside me, like he couldn’t believe how good this was either, like I was his woman and he’d finally come home. I knew Taylor had a confident way about him, but never in a million years had I expected anything like this. I rocked my hips rapidly back against him, and suddenly I felt my pussy flex around his cock as I came for a second time.
“Oh, shit.” He growled once more, and moments later he came to a standstill inside me and held himself there, cock twitching, and I could tell by the sudden breath that he let out that he had just come as well.
For a long moment Taylor didn’t move, holding himself still, as though, like me, he was allowing himself some time to reconnect to reality. And then, eventually, almost reluctantly, he pulled himself out of me and quickly disposed of the condom.
He flopped down on the bed and I pulled the covers up and over both of us. However hot that had bee
n, it was still cold in the house at night. He reached over and pulled me against his chest, and as soon as I was in his arms once more I forgot all about the chill in the air. What a solid, amazing chest to lay my head on. I could fall asleep and dream against it all night.
“Mmm.” He nuzzled his face into my hair.
I closed my eyes and comforted myself with the sound of his slow, steady heartbeat. “That was really good,” I finally managed, blurting the words out like an awkward teenager.
He laughed and stroked my hair. “Kayla?”
I sighed and stirred against him. “Yeah?”
“Can I ask you something?” Taylor asked.
I mumbled a sleepy sure.
“Have you ever loved someone?”
This question acted like five shots of espresso and a thousand alarm clocks. I held myself perfectly still, like I was suddenly cuddling with a wild animal who might bolt at any unexpected movement.
“I don’t know,” I said slowly. “I thought I loved the guy I dated in high school. We tried to do the long distance thing when we graduated, but we drifted and neither of us tried to stop it, so, I don’t know, maybe I never did love him.”
I could feel the tension in Taylor’s chest.
“And my ex and I, Grant, told each other we loved each other after dating for a few months,” I continued. “But I question now whether I said that because he did or if I actually felt those feelings.” At Taylor’s nod, I shrugged and added, “So, I guess the short answer is that I don’t know.”
Taylor was silent for a moment and I wondered if the conversation was over. But then he spoke, quietly, hesitantly. “I’m worried that I can’t.”
I frowned. “Can’t what?”
He shifted uncomfortably and readjusted me in his arms. He held me tighter. “I’m worried I’m not capable of loving.”
I almost laughed, but stopped when I caught sight of his face and saw he was serious. He bit at his lip and creases of worry lined his forehead.
“You know Laura, the real estate agent whose card I gave you?” He waited until I nodded, then he plunged on. “When we were in college, Laura was more than a roommate—she was my girlfriend. Our girlfriend. But in the end… she loved me,” he said. “I could see it clear as day in her eyes. I knew she loved me and I just…I just couldn’t feel it back. I tried for a while. I really, really tried. But I couldn’t. I should have. And I couldn’t.”
