“Only because I’ve wanted to be.” He continues playing with the end of my hair. I want to curl into his caress, purr like a cat, and let him pet me everywhere. It’s been too long since a man touched me so softly.
“You’re a good man,” I whisper as he drops my hair and lets his hand cup my cheek. This time I do curl into his caress, but I keep from purring. That would be a little too weird for both of us.
His head shakes as the side of his mouth tilts up. “I’m just a guy who wants to show you there are good men out there.”
“Trust me, Anthony.” I lean in, kissing him on the cheek. “You’re doing a really good job of it.”
“Let’s go.” He hitches his head toward his truck.
I let my hand fall, grasping his lightly as he helps me step on the running board and take the passenger seat. As he turns to head for town, I look in the side-view mirror, seeing my home in the distance. There could be a metaphor here, me leaving my past behind as I drive toward my future. This is something that would have scared me before, would have given me so much anxiety I would have re-thought the situation and decided to stay where it was comfortable. My fear of change kept me with Brent for so long, I almost didn’t live to see my way out. Crazy how things work in life.
Across the console, Anthony reaches over, grabbing my hand. His every action has shown me that he will help me go where it’s uncomfortable, he will be by my side when it doesn’t feel like I can handle what I’ve been dealt. I hold onto his fingers for dear life, and I know that with him by my side, I can do anything I put my mind to.
For a moment, I close my eyes, center myself, and realize I’m ready. This may not be easy, but it’ll totally be worth it.
* * *
“Violet!!!”
I hear the high-pitched squeal before I even make it inside the building. There’s a small hesitation as I come to the doorway of The Café; I feel a small push of foreboding, a little bit of dread. I know that I must overcome it. If I don’t, every time I walk inside, every time I drive down the street, or when I happen to think about it will be a hard moment to overcome. Instead I have to choose happiness. I have to choose excitement, and I need to remember this greeting one of my best friends is giving me. “I’m so glad you’re back!”
I’ve missed Leighton, almost forgetting how contagious her smile and good mood are. When you’re around her you can’t help but have a good time. She makes sure of it. She runs to me, hugging me tightly around the neck, whispering words of encouragement in my ear. “I’m glad I’m back too.” I squeeze her hard. Regret hitting me hardcore that I haven’t made time to see her, that I haven’t allowed her to be a part of this recovery process. At first I’d thought I needed it to be singular, but now, looking at her, I realize we’ve all been recovering. “I’m sorry I haven’t seen you,” I whisper.
“Don’t even.” She pulls back, shaking her head, not accepting the apology. “Don’t even. We all deal with things the way we need to. I’ve had Ace keeping tabs on you, and he’s been assuring me you’re fine.” She looks over at him, an eyebrow raised as she turns her gaze back to me, looking for confirmation that he hasn’t lied to her.
I struggle for what to say. What is there to say? I’m obviously not a hundred percent, but I’m good enough to be here right now. There’s not a magic wand I can wave and make everything okay again. If there were, I would have waved it the day I got out of the hospital. Instead, I answer as honestly as I can.
“I’m gettin’ there.”
And I say the words, I realize I’m telling the truth. Glancing at the table I’d been sitting at when Brent attacked me, I feel nauseous and light-headed, but I tamp it down. He will only have power if I give it to him, and I refuse to give him anything else to use against me. I force myself to look closely at the table. Imagine myself sitting there and run through the memory of what happened that day. It’s not easy, but it’s necessary. The only person who can force me to face the truth is me.
Looking around the room, I see regulars sitting in their favorite booths. Ernie’s come out from behind the grill, a huge smile showing teeth we never see on his face, and it looks like even Caleb has made the trip over before school. He’s got a proud smile on his face, and it feels good to know all of these people have come here for me, that in some small way, I’ve made them proud. If I’m not mistaken, outside, members of the Moonshine Task Force are loitering, drinking coffee, but at the same time keeping an eye on what’s going on inside. All of these things combined reiterate the fact that this is home. I’ve made the right decision in staying here, in allowing these people to be friends, allowing them to be a part of my life.
“You okay?” Anthony asks. His voice is quietly reassuring, giving me the encouragement I need. I can’t imagine what he’s thinking, if he’s wondering that he pushed me too hard, that maybe I should have waited a few more days before I came back here.
Truth be told, I’d almost come back in the dead of the night to face this place, without the prying eyes of friends and community. But that had felt like a coward’s way out. I can say with total assurance right now this is the way I was meant to do it, and I’m glad I’ve been able to push myself this way. I no longer want to hide in the shadows, pretend that things don’t bother me, and live my life only turned half-way up. Now, I want to experience it at full volume.
“Everything’s good.”
And I realize for the first time in a long while it’s the truth; I believe those words and I’m ready to live them. The only thing holding me back now is me.
CHAPTER SIX
Violet
In the last two months, things have settled down. I’m in a routine that I can live with. One that allows me to feel safe but also stretches the boundaries of what makes me feel comfortable. The only thing I would change would be my living situation. I hate being out in the middle of nowhere and wish I could afford to move closer town.
I’m wiping down the counter, waiting for The Café to open when Caleb drags himself through the front door. “Morning.” I give him a smile.
He gives me a look, scrunching up his nose. “It should be illegal to be getting up this early, especially to be in a good mood about it.”
“When you’ve been through things I’ve been through, you’re glad to be able to wake up in the morning. You’re thankful for it.”
He raises an eyebrow. “I guess.”
“C’mon back here.” Ernie motions to the younger boy. “I already got enough dishes for you to run a sink full.”
He sighs but puts on an apron and gets to work. It’s a Saturday, I guess I can understand why he’s upset. He probably has a party to go to tonight. According to Anthony, the kids have been partying it up in the fields and at the barns lately. Although Caleb is a good kid, it doesn’t mean he’s not out having a good time too.
“I’m going to open the door,” I yell back to them, checking the time on my cell as I do. Leighton will be in a little later today, and we’ve picked up a high school girl who helps fill in the gaps.
As I lift up the blind that covers the plate glass door when we’re closed, my breath is taken. The sun is coming up over the horizon, marking the sky with pinks and purples. Stars are still shining in certain spots as a new dawn starts to reclaim the night sky. Taking a deep breath, I realize what I said to Caleb is true. Anytime I can enjoy a sunrise and a sunset, I will mark it as a blessing in my book. Months ago, when I laid in that hospital bed, I worried I’d never see one again.
Pushing the door open, I hold it with my foot as I pull the chalkboard sign out that announces our specials for the day. When the weight is taken off my foot, I glance up. Standing in front of me is a person who sometimes takes my breath away. “Mornin’, Violet.”
Dressed in his gear, Anthony is a feast for the eyes. “Morning.” I take in his appearance, the scruff on his cheeks and chin, the dark circles under his eyes. “Did you work overnight?”
“Yeah, it was unexpected, but Stella’s sick enou
gh they had to take her to the ER so I covered for Renegade. Which means I have to be back to work in about eight hours.”
“What are you doing here?”
He runs a hand across those abs of his pulling his shirt tight against the muscles. “Hungry as hell, and I wanted to talk to you about something.”
Now my interest is piqued. He holds the door open for me as we enter the still empty Café. Ernie sees him from the back and yells out a greeting, telling him his usual will be right up.
“Coffee?” I ask, as I get behind the counter and he has a seat at one of the chairs attached.
“Better not, I’ve got to go to sleep when I get home. How about some OJ?”
“Coming right up.”
Making myself busy, I get him a big glass of OJ and then pick up the food Ernie has already finished for him. Setting it down, I watch as he digs in. “So what is it you wanted to talk to me about?”
“Oh yeah.” He takes a drink of his OJ, washing down the huge bite of food he took. “You know I live in a duplex? The other part is now vacant. They were evicted last week, and my landlord hasn’t rented it out yet. I told him about you and how you wanted to move closer to town. You should come take a look at it this afternoon.”
“There’s no way I can afford to live there, Anthony. Thank you for recommending me, but I can guarantee you I can’t afford it.”
His green eyes meet mine, the dark stubble around his mouth making his lips stand out. “I think you’d be surprised. All you have to do is go check it out and talk to him. He’d be willing to work with you. Besides you aren’t stuck in a lease with where you’re living. Brent is in jail for the foreseeable future, so sweetheart, you can do whatever the fuck it is you want.”
I know with every fiber of my being that I won’t be able to afford the duplex, but to make Anthony happy, I’ll have a look. “Can you get in touch with him and ask if I can look after I get off work?”
He pulls his cell phone out of his pocket, giving me a heart-fluttering smile. “Sure thing.”
* * *
And that’s how I ended up here, sitting outside the duplex Anthony lives in waiting for his landlord. I’m assuming Anthony is fast asleep, or just waking up, depending on when he actually has to leave for his shift. I’ve been here a few times, and each time, I wonder what it would be like to live in a nice place. The outside is brick, the doors to each side face each other with a shared wide porch in the front, and in the back. The doors aren’t the cheap kind that my mobile home has. They’re solid wood with an actual peephole and a patterned glass situated in the middle. Again, nicer than anything I’ve ever lived in.
A huge truck pulls up beside my little car, and a man hops down, walking toward me with his hands in his pockets. This must be the landlord. Quickly grabbing my purse, I get out of my car.
“You must be Violet.” He holds his hand out for me to shake. “Ace has told me a lot about you. I’m Fulcher.”
I just bet he has. “I am, and nice to meet you.” I shake his hand confidently. “I’m gonna be real honest with you though, Fulcher. I’m not even a tiny bit sure I can afford what you’ve got here.”
“Let’s just take a look at it, and then we’ll talk about it.”
There’s a part of me that doesn’t want to get my hopes up, but there’s another part of me that desperately wants something good to happen, something that I didn’t expect. A beautiful surprise. Dear God, let this be it. We enter, and the clean smell assaults me. No stale cigarette smoke; I still can’t get the smell out of the trailer even though Brent’s been gone for months. There’s newly finished hardwood floor, judging by the way the boards shine. The open concept is appealing, I can see the front door from the sink. There’s a nice stove, a dishwasher, and a small pantry.
“It’s a one-bedroom,” he cautions as we walk down the hall-way. “Ace has two, but I wanted to have options when I built the place.”
“One is perfect for me,” I assure him as we enter. It’s good-sized, bigger than both the bedrooms in my trailer and it looks like they’ve put in new carpet.
“Because it’s only a one bedroom, it’s got a walk-in closet that’s huge. I’ve seen other people in my rentals turn them into closets with offices in some of the extra space, it’s so big. Ready to see it?”
“Yeah.” I grin.
When he opens the door, I gasp. It’s huge, gorgeous, and everything a woman would want. There’s even a vanity in the back, which is probably why many turn them into offices. We end the tour with a look at a basic bathroom.
“There’s a small storage shed on your side. Ace has his own in the backyard. I don’t allow pets without a deposit, but if you were to want to get one, the back is completely fenced,” he explains as he watches me, looking over the place again.
“What about upkeep?”
“I take care of everything that naturally happens. You bust a hole in my drywall, I charge you for it. A pipe bursts, the washer or dryer goes, the dishwasher takes a shit, that’s me. I also take care of yard work, that’s included in the lease.”
I take a deep breath, ready to ask him the question that’s been at the back of my mind since we started this. “How much is it a month?”
“You were honest with me, I’m gonna be honest with you.” He sticks his hands in his pockets and leans against the breakfast bar. “I normally rent this place out for seven-fifty a month with a deposit, background check, and credit check.”
My face crumbles. I’m paying five hundred for the little trailer, and some months it’s hard to come up with that. There’s no way I have enough for a deposit or another almost three-hundred bucks a month. “This place is gorgeous, and I wish I could afford it.” Embarrassing tears are pricking at the back of my eyes.
“Wait.” He holds up a hand. “That’s what I normally do, but Ace has told me a lot about you. My niece was in the same sort of situation you were in, and someone helped her. I’d like to pay that forward. This place is paid off so all this is, is income for me, and I served with Ace in the military. He saved me once, and I’ve owed him a long time. How much do you pay for rent now?” He crosses his legs at the ankle and stares at me.
“Five hundred.” I cringe. “Thank you, but there’s no way you can give me this place for five hundred, and I understand that.”
“Yes, I can.” He comes off the bar. “I hear you’re in school.”
“I am.” I nod. “Should be done at the end of next year, when I plan to get a better job.”
“How about we do this?” He pulls a piece of paper out of his pocket.
I eye it, it’s a folded-up piece of notebook paper, and he’s making notes on it in hurried scratches. The writing so undeniably masculine it makes me want to laugh. I watch as he writes what he’s saying.
“The first year, you’ll pay five hundred a month. If you’re still here during the second year, after you’ve found a new job, you’ll pay six hundred, and then if you can afford it and you’re still here, we’ll raise it to the normal price in the third year. I’m not above working with you, Violet. Like I said, I owe Ace my life, and there were a lot of very nice people who helped my niece. I know you’ll pay your rent.” He lays the pen down. “The people here before you didn’t pay shit for almost six months. They made me evict them. I have a feeling you’re honest.”
“To a fault,” I agree.
“Then let me do this for you. Let me do it for my niece, let me do it for Ace.”
My heart is pounding and my head is spinning. “Are you sure I wouldn’t put you in a bind?”
He shakes his head, smiling ruefully. “I fucked my knee up on Ace and mine’s last mission. I was medically discharged from the military and Uncle Sam pays me a nice pension. I do this because I don’t wanna be fucking bored all day long. I can afford to be nice to you, if you’d just let me.”
I lean in, take the pen he’s set down, and sign my name. “There, sign yours so it’s a contract.”
He grins. “Awesome, but ca
n I be real honest with you again?”
“I think that’s the only way we know how to be, Fulcher.” I grin back at him.
“I have a real good feeling you’re not gonna be here in a year. That guy next door seems to care about you, and if there’s one thing I know about him, he’s patient but he’s stubborn as fuck.”
“We’re friends,” I argue.
“Friends make the best lovers.” He holds up his left hand, showing a wedding ring. “If anyone knows that, it’s me.”
I’m speechless as I look at him.
“Here’s your key.” He hands me a set. “They’re new locks, so the old tenants can’t get in. The utilities are still on; all you have to do is have them transferred. Your first month’s rent will be due on the fifteenth of next month. That day good for you?”
In a whirlwind I tell him yes and watch as he walks out of what’s now mine. Left alone, I twirl around in a circle. How did I ever get this lucky?
And when my eyes land on the door across the way from mine, I realize it was all when the man living there came into my life. If there ever was a gift from God, Anthony has been mine.
CHAPTER SEVEN
Ace
“Where do you want this?” I groan as I hold tightly onto the box that must hold every pot and pan Violet owns.
“The kitchen,” she directs me, as she turns around, pointing to where I need to go.
As she does, I try to force my eyes away from the tight pants she’s wearing. If there’s one thing Violet has, it’s a grade A ass. It’s firm, tight, and round, with what looks like enough give I could get a good handful if she’d ever let me touch her. Thankful that the box I’m bringing in is hiding what is now an erection, I focus back on the task at hand. Especially when I hear the other helpers stomping up the steps of the porch.
Ace Page 4
