“Not exactly the reaction I was hoping for,” he said wryly as he kissed the inside of her leg, her lower belly, her ribs, making his way to her mouth.
“It’s not that. It’s just, I was thinking how much better that was than my magic wand.”
Clearly caught off guard, he stopped in mid ascent and laughed before he seated himself between her spread legs. Never had she felt like this, like a wanton woman. Somewhere along the way, he had lost his boxer briefs, and suddenly he was there, pressing against her. Sucking in a breath, she felt her body go taut with anticipation. Misunderstanding, he immediately stopped and began to pull away, but she locked her legs around his hips and held him tight.
“No, don’t pull away.”
“I don’t want to rush you.” His words came out choppy, his breaths ragged. The man would have stopped even if it used up every ounce of willpower, and as hard as it was if she said to stop, he would have. If she didn’t know she loved him before, she knew it with every fiber of her being at that moment.
“I love you, Ethan Vanderbilt. You aren’t rushing me. I want you, I want this. It got real, but that was my body anticipating what was to come. Nothing more. Please don’t pull away from me, from this, from us.”
“Quinn, I could never pull away from you. I love you. Let me show you how good it can be when there’s nothing but love in the room.”
Slowly, his mouth lowered to hers, and he was kissing her slowly and tenderly, and as the kiss deepened, he sunk into her by slow degrees, allowing her body to adjust to him. Her fingers dug into his arm, her injured arm resting on his shoulder, as he withdrew, and slowly, ever so slowly, filled her as far as he could. Then he pulled out and pushed back in, again and again, until a rhythm was set, and she was meeting him thrust for glorious thrust, and still, he was kissing her, loving her as he filled her over and over. She felt that wonderful tingling begin to build again and broke the kiss, biting his shoulder as her climax ripped through her. His tempo picked up as she crested that glorious wave of sensation once more, while his body finally found its own release.
Relaxing, he lowered himself onto her for the briefest of moments, before he rolled to the side tucking her into his body. He pulled the blanket up and over them as they both tried to regain control of their breathing.
“That was amazing,” she breathed. “I never knew…”
He was kissing her neck and drawing lazy circles on her shoulder when she sat bolt upright in bed, drawing the blankets up and around her body as if they could shield her from what had just occurred to her.
“What?” He sat up, instantly on high alert.
“How stupid. Oh, I can’t believe I didn’t think of it. I was just so lost in what was happening, it never dawned on me.”
“What are you talking about?” he asked, bewildered.
“I’m not on birth control.”
Ethan had been terrified when Quinn sat up, nearly knocking him off the edge of the bed, until the moment she said what had freaked her out. Instantly, he relaxed, his body once again melting into that after-sex feeling of euphoria. He gently tugged her down, once again tucking her body against his. As far as he was concerned, she could stay right there for the rest of their lives; that is, if they didn’t need basic essentials, like food, water, and bathroom breaks. Her body was rigid as he resumed kissing the place where her shoulder met her neck.
“Is that all?” he asked, once again lazily circling her arm.
“Is that all? Is that all?” she cried out.
“I don’t understand what the big deal is. Unless you’re worried about STDs or STIs? Because I’m regularly checked. With my job, there’s the constant danger of coming into contact with bodily fluids. So, there’s no need to worry about that on my end.”
“No, it’s not that. I mean, that’s good to know, I guess. Though in the end, it wouldn’t matter to me. I love you no matter what. You don’t have to worry about me. I, um, I mean, I haven’t had a partner in a long time.”
“How long?” he asked hesitantly, a little concerned what the answer would be.
“Fourteen years.”
He was silent for a moment as he let that realization sink in.
“So, when you said that was so much better than your magic wand. You really meant it?”
“Yes, I really meant it.” She burst out laughing but immediately sobered. “Does that bother you? That I don’t have a lot of experience?”
Try no experience, he thought.
“No. I would be lying if there wasn’t a small part of my inner selfish male doing cartwheels right now, but I wouldn’t care if you had a dozen partners. It’s just I would have gone slower this time.”
“I think the pace you set was just fine.” The statement was tongue-in-cheek. “I didn’t abstain from sex all these years out of fear. Like I said, I don’t do things I don’t want to, and I hadn’t found someone I wanted to have sex with until you came along. Then all I could think about was having sex with you. That magic wand got a hell of a work out the last few months.” Now it was his turn to laugh.
“Thank you?” he responded.
“Yeah, that’s a compliment, and you know it.” She pinched his arm. Her voice went serious. “Aren’t you worried we might have just made a baby?”
“Nope. Not at all.”
“You’re that certain it didn’t happen? The timing is right, for me, as far as my monthly cycle.”
“That’s not what I meant.”
“Then you are concerned?”
“Nope.”
“I’m lost.”
“What I’m trying to tell you is that I don’t care if a baby was just made. In fact, that would make me extremely happy.”
“You mean, you wouldn’t care—at all—if we conceive a baby? Even if I can’t marry you and give that baby a normal upbringing?”
“Who says it isn’t normal? Plenty of unmarried people raise children as good, if not better, than married people. As long as that baby has parents who love them, that’s all that matters.” His voice had gone distant as he clearly was thinking of Kara and his parents and how they hadn’t loved them, especially Kara, the way they had deserved to be loved.
“I just meant, I would want to do it the traditional way.”
“Then we have to find that son of a bitch and take him out of your life once and for all. You know that if I find him, I won’t let him near you, right?”
“I know that you would do your best. I also know that he would find a way to get to me if he knew where to find me. After this much time, I wouldn’t be able to press charges.”
“At the very least, we could dissolve any legal ties there might be.”
“And then what? I would have to explain my fake documentation.”
He sighed. He knew she was right. Of course, he knew that, but he also knew that there had to be a way out of this nightmare she was forced to endure, but now wasn’t the time to discuss it. They could talk about it all night and still not come up with any kind of solid answers, and he would prefer to spend that time on other things.
“For now, I don’t want to talk about him. I don’t want you worrying about him, and I damn well don’t want him ruining what we have going on here and now. I want to celebrate that I finally broke through those walls you erected around yourself and claimed you as mine.”
“Claimed me as yours, huh?” she asked, pinching him again.
Fast as lightning, he rolled on his back and pulled her on top of him. It was a good thing that her body had started to feel better because she suspected she was going to feel every inch of this night in the morning, as she was shocked to feel the erection that was evident against her bottom.
“Yeah, claiming you as mine. Got a problem with that?” he asked as he hooked a finger in the cup of her bra and dragged it down, leaving her breast exposed to his hungry mouth.
“How can you…so soon…” Her question was broken, and he smiled wickedly at her dazed expression.
“Are you c
omplaining?”
“Huh?” She blinked down at him a few times as he rolled his hips under her.
“That I’m so attracted to you that I’m ready and able to go again?”
“Not complaining. Not even a little bit. Mmm, do that again,” she said when he tugged on her nipple with his teeth.
A groan escaped her, and her head tipped back as she allowed herself to succumb to the sensations. He growled and sucked her nipple into his mouth, nipping it again. She arched into him, allowing him easier access, and he happily took advantage of the angle. While he licked and played with her nipple, his hand slid between her legs and teased that tender, swollen nub. Another moan slipped past her lips. He placed his hands on her hips and gently lifted her enough to help guide her to him. For a moment, the trance was broken, and she looked at him bewildered.
“I don’t know if I can…” Her voice was shy and so unlike the strong, assertive Quinn he knew and loved.
“Yeah, you can.” He released her hips and let her slide onto him. Her lips parted as she sat there a moment, and then he gently encouraged her to move.
As if a switch was flipped, she took the reins and brazenly rode him, her eyes locked on his the whole time as she moved up and down, until her body went rigid with her orgasm and he took that as his cue to thrust up and into her once, twice, before he bucked as his own orgasm took over his body. She slumped against him and lay on top of his body. And he felt like he was home, for the first time in his whole life.
25
A huge yawn shook her whole body as she lay curled up next to Ethan. Her eyes were so tired, but she didn’t want to fall asleep. Not yet. Right then, she wanted to bask in the moment—the exhilarating moment of making love for the first time in her life. Her legs were tangled with his, and the sheets were just as tangled, but she felt untangled for the first time ever. No emotional tangle in her heart, her head. Just one hundred percent bliss. Through that bliss, a thought reached into her sleepy mind. She stood up and stretched.
“Where are you going?” he asked as she threw a T-shirt on. His T-shirt.
“I’m going to put some food outside for Cat. Hopefully, that’ll encourage her to come back.”
“Good idea. Let me throw on some pants; no way I’m letting you go out there alone.”
Not willing to argue, she went into the kitchen and filled Cat’s food dish. It struck her then that she wanted him to go with her outside. She was still jumpy, not to mention she wasn’t completely healed. It felt good to have someone want to bear some of it with her. While she acknowledged that, she also knew it didn’t make her weak. What it made her was a woman finally willing to share her load and her life with a man versus being the one to do it all alone.
“You never told me why Officer Rodriguez was up in that apartment,” she said as they walked outside to put the bowl on the porch. “You should install a kitty door here and in your apartment if you’re going to let her come and go.”
“I’ll look into doing that. Remember, I hadn’t planned on owning a cat, to begin with. As for Officer Rodriguez, I would tell you that we can talk about it in the morning, but technically it is morning, albeit the wee hours, but I know that you won’t sleep until I tell you.”
“You’re right. On both counts.”
“I got a phone call and was told that my apartment was being watched. The only reason I could think of for that to happen is because you’re here. I got nervous about it and had a conversation with my captain where I demanded that someone be put here to watch you since I can’t be here at all times. We’re spinning our wheels on this case. Even with someone on the inside, we still aren’t getting anywhere.”
“Surely you have enough to take him down?”
“Not really. He’s clever and keeps layers of people around him to protect him from prosecution.”
“He has fall guys?”
“And women and someone who cleans up the loose ends.” He sighed.
He watched as she set the bowl down and then he pulled her into his arms. They lingered on the porch for a moment. She didn’t want to go inside yet, and she was secretly hoping that just being outside would be enough to get Cat to come in. After a few minutes, when it became clear she wasn’t coming, they turned and went back inside, back to the bed that was still slightly warm from their body heat. She curled against his body, feeling more at ease than she could ever remember.
“Green Bay arrested two men—the ones who were trying to buy the kids.”
“That’s great.”
“They were killed while in holding.”
“What? How is that possible?”
“We don’t know; we don’t even know what happened. We just know one was knifed and the other was hung. They weren’t even there twenty-four hours.”
“You know that the one didn’t kill himself.”
“Yeah, I know. The police never got to interrogate them fully. Even worse, the couple that had Becky were reported missing by their family. We were hoping that they just went on the lamb.”
“They’re dead.” She was certain. She didn’t know how she knew, but she did all the same. “Whoever’s behind this doesn’t leave anyone behind to lead the police to him. He’s smart.”
“No one is too smart to get caught; he will mess up. There’ll be something that’s his kryptonite. But, you’re right. The people who had Becky were our best chance to nail him.”
“This is so frustrating. There has to be something we can do before it’s too late for Jasmine and who knows how many others. Paulie Romano was pretending to be a priest. A priest. It’s disgusting. I’m not sorry he’s dead, and that makes me feel like a bad person.”
“No, it makes you human. He wasn’t a good guy. He made decisions he didn’t have to make. You always have a choice to pick the right side, and in the end, he realized that. But the damage was already done, and it was too late. He gambled and crossed the wrong person and died because of it. Had he not made that one mistake in working for this asshole, he’d probably still be alive.”
“I just don’t understand what makes people so evil. Can you tell me that?”
“No. I can’t. If anyone knew the answer to that, I’d be out of a job.”
“I can’t believe you freaked out and forced Bob to put detail on me.”
“Yes, I freaked out, and I’m not going to apologize. For what it’s worth, I didn’t force him. He agreed and said to hell with the mayor’s budget. The bodies are piling up, and it’s only a matter of time before one of the good guys gets added to that pile.”
“I think plenty of good guys have been added to that pile already if you consider all the innocent kids who’ve been taken and gotten rid of to hide their tracks. Even if they do get away, they’re forever changed.”
“You’re right, I’m sorry. It was insensitive of me. I was thinking how we’ve been fortunate to not have lost an officer. It was a win getting all those kids back, but you’re correct; they’re changed forever. Even if we got to them before major harm was done, their innocence has been shattered.”
“I think a lot of the kids they targeted already had their innocence shattered, that’s why they were selected, but you shouldn’t feel bad. You got those kids home, and that’s a win. If their parents get them help, they’ll do fine. Unfortunately, in some of these cases, that won’t happen. I was thinking of all the other kids, and even adults, people we don’t know about that have been taken or conned into getting involved in this lifestyle, just thinking of the bigger picture. In a lot of these cases, the kids who go missing are already fighting to survive to adulthood. I just want to neuter every last one of the people who buy or sell them.”
“You and me both. That’s why we need to stop this before it escalates.”
“Then what? Someone else will move in to take their place.”
“Maybe. It’d be naïve to say no, but that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t stop this particular person from continuing with his operation.”
“You’re
right. Sorry for being so pessimistic. It sometimes just feels like nothing we do is good enough. You know?”
“Yeah, I know, but that’s why we chose these jobs because we know even if someone else is standing in line to take over being the new resident bad guy; someone has to try to stop them, or they will completely permeate the whole system.”
“It’s just so widespread, it’s impossible not to feel overwhelmed by it all. Even so, I’m not washing my hands of this and walking away. They deserve a chance to have a good life, not the one that they’re being forced into.”
“I agree, but you need to know that you can’t win them all. I started this job thinking I could, and I was really close to burning out.”
“What did you do to survive?”
“Women. I filled the sleepless nights with women. Mostly one-night stands, no commitments. For the most part, they knew what they were getting into, but every once in a while, there was a woman who wanted to try to save me or get me to commit.”
“But not anymore?”
“Not for a while now.”
“What changed?” But she thought she knew the answer.
“You. I haven’t had another woman in my bed or elsewhere since that night where a fierce little pixie came into my hospital room and held my hand without saying a word. From that night on, I didn’t need all those women to fill the sleepless nights. I had a pair of amazing hazel eyes and a girl that changed her appearance so often I got lost trying to figure out which look was my favorite.”
“About that…”
“You had me fooled, everyone fooled. We just thought it was your quirky personality. Now, I know better—it’s a way to hide in plain sight.”
“At first it was to help me stay hidden, but when years went by, and the danger seemed to dissipate, it became a habit I couldn’t break. Like a security blanket. You had your one-night stands, I had my Clairol or whatever version was on sale.”
Breaking Shadows (Darkness Falls Book 2) Page 25
