by Donna Alward
She’d been, quite simply, incredible. He still couldn’t believe he’d suggested a secret affair. That was so not his style. He’d never had a casual-sex kind of relationship in his life.
He tugged her to her feet, wishing the afternoon didn’t have to end. Together they packed up the picnic basket, and he shook off the sand stuck to the blanket before folding it and putting it in the pack. It was almost like the afternoon had never happened.
Except he could still taste her.
They made their way back to the dock, and he marveled at how easy it was to be with her. He didn’t feel the need to make pointless conversation, and the silence wasn’t awkward, either. They could just be. He didn’t feel the need to pretend or be upbeat. He stopped short, though, when he saw how far the tide had gone out. He’d tied up close to the top of the dock, which meant that right now his boat was sitting in about two inches of water and resting on wet sand.
“Oops,” Lizzie said, and he saw her raise an eyebrow.
“Looks like we’re going to have to wait,” he said, feeling completely stupid. He’d misjudged either the tide or the time or perhaps a bit of both. “I’m sorry, Lizzie. It was a dumb mistake on my part. I feel like an idiot.”
When she turned around, he was surprised to see a twinkle in her eye. “You know what this means, right?”
He lifted a shoulder. He had no idea what she was getting at.
“It means we can search for treasure.”
He grinned. “You didn’t actually believe all that claptrap, did you?”
“Why not?” She let her tote slide to her feet. “Did you make it up?”
“Of course not. But it’s all legend. The boys and I used to come out here all the time and we never found anything. It was just kids being kids.”
“So? That doesn’t mean it’s not true.”
“You know, I’m starting to realize you’re very different away from the office.”
Her smile widened. “That’s the nicest thing you could have said to me. I think I forgot how to have fun over the last few months. Today kind of reminded me.”
If what had happened on the beach was her idea of fun … he was happy to help. Anytime. Because the truth was he hadn’t been that close to a woman since Erin had died. In fact, the months leading up to her death hadn’t been great for their marriage, either. He’d wanted a baby. Erin had seemed … distant. Before her last deployment, he’d learned why.
He’d found the birth control pills.
But he didn’t want to think of that today. Not now, when it felt like he and Lizzie were the only two people in the world. He went to the boat and put the cooler and pack inside. “Come on, then. We can leave our stuff here. Let’s walk. Who knows, maybe we’ll find something.”
“Great!”
She looked almost girlish as she put her tote in the boat and turned around to face him. She’d put her damp, tangled hair in a messy sort of topknot with only an elastic—how did women get so talented at things like that anyway? Her eyes were bright and impish, her smile easy.
She was absolutely stunning.
“Come on. Let’s head to the other side of the island. If someone was going to hide something, I’m guessing it would be there. Way more nooks and crannies rather than sandy beaches.”
He held out his hand.
She took it.
It felt strange and pleasant and a little adolescent to climb the dirt path hand in hand. He led the way, away from the sand and marsh grass up over a hill, where scrubby brush dotted the landscape along with knobby, uneven rocks. Farther along they encountered evergreens and lusher grass, but that was short-lived. The island was small, a rocky dot in an otherwise endless sea. They stopped at the crest of a hill and looked out. “What do you think?” he asked.
She let go of his hand, took a deep breath, and turned in a circle. “You can’t see land anywhere. How can that be, when we could see it from the top of Blackberry Hill?”
“It’s not as far as it seems.” He pointed. “Look. Right there, see that darker line? That’s the coastline. The haze today is hiding it a little, but on a perfectly clear day you can see it better.”
“But it does seem far. Like we’re in the middle of nowhere. It’s wild and a little frightening and exciting all at once.”
He knew exactly how she felt.
“You really rowed your way out here in your uncle’s dory?”
He grinned. “Yeah, we did. Thank God we told them where we were going. Once it sprung a leak, we were stranded. We were lucky we were so close to the island and didn’t drown.”
“That’s a very different existence from my upbringing.” She laughed. “My parents didn’t even like me walking to the neighborhood convenience store.”
“I hear having boys is different from having girls,” he said.
She winked at him. “I said they didn’t like it. Not that I didn’t do it.”
“You rebel.”
She laughed, the sound floating on the air. “Come on. The path keeps going and I see rocks down there. Maybe there are caves.”
“There are.”
This time he let her lead the way down the path, picking her way over the rocks. He knew very well that the path led down some natural rock stairs—he and his buddies had traveled this path often enough over the years—down to the rocky shore and the jagged cliffs and caves.
“If Charles hid treasure here, he would have had to anchor offshore and row it in,” she mused. “Or dock on the other side and carry it overland. Which is unlikely.”
“We thought so, too. But we never found anything. On either shore.”
“Nothing?”
“No. Except … well, I’ll show you. It’s supercool.”
They cautiously climbed their way down, picking over the rocks carefully, as they were slippery with water and seaweed from the tide. She and Josh had walked only fifty or sixty feet when he stopped, tugged on her hand, and nodded toward the cliffs.
“Look. At low tide you can really see them.”
Nooks, crannies, and deeper caves were eroded into the cliffs by years of tides and winds. Lizzie walked ahead, her expression open and inquisitive as she approached the rocks. A smear of dirt ran up the side of her shorts and her feet were muddy inside her sandals, but she didn’t seem to care. It was such a switch from the neat and tidy, not a hair out of place woman he knew from work or even outside of work in Jewell Cove. This woman reminded him of the one who’d flirted with a teenager to take his mind off of a dislocated knee, who brushed the dirt from a ball field off her knees and smiled easily, openly. He’d liked her that day. Liked her even more as they watched the stars from the bed of his pickup. But today …
Maybe touching her had been a mistake. She was only here for a short time and he was under no illusions about that. When Charlie’s maternity leave was over, Lizzie Howard would go back to where she really belonged. He wasn’t sure his “idea” of enjoying each other during her stay was a sound one. He could get caught up in her quite easily. And the last thing he felt like doing was getting his heart trampled on again.
The biggest surprise was realizing that this woman might actually be able to put him in that position.
“Come on!” she called. She was walking ahead of him, heading toward the biggest gap in the rock, the wind whipping some of her hair out of her knot. He picked up the pace and worked on catching up with her.
“Josh, look!” Lizzie’s voice echoed off the dark rock. “I can actually stand up in here!”
The rock was still shiny and wet from the last tide, and dripping sounds echoed eerily off the walls. “It’s creepy in here.”
“Don’t be such a wuss,” she tossed back at him. “Didn’t you come in here as kids?”
He had, but he hadn’t actually liked this part. Something about being closed in and in the dark. “Well, yeah. Of course we did. I’m just not a big fan of small, dark spaces.” He hesitated. “Or being underground.”
There was a reason w
hy he preferred being on the open water. Freedom and lots and lots of air to breathe. Any time he’d spent in bunkers in the military had just about driven him bananas.
“I did a tour of the Hoover Dam once when I was a kid,” she said, hunching over and stepping farther inside the cave. “You probably would have hated that. Though when I was going through the rocky part of the tour fresh air was piped in.”
He shuddered. Anytime he thought of underground mining or anything of that sort, he got a weird, crawly sensation in the pit of his stomach.
“So, any treasure in here, Dr. Howard?”
“Naw,” she answered, her voice bouncing off the rock. “How high does the tide come in here anyway? Any treasure’s probably buried topside, right? Where it wouldn’t get drowned in salt water?”
“Right,” he agreed, wishing she’d back out of the cave. He squinted in the darkness, waiting for his eyes to finish adjusting. “Though the story does say that slaves hid in these caves, waiting for their ship to come and take them north. Part of that whole Underground Railroad thing.”
“What if the tide came in?”
“I don’t know. It’s a good question. Which is probably why it’s just a story.” He took a few short breaths, trying to steady his heartbeat.
A few seconds later and Lizzie was there, right in front of him, a goofy smile on her face. “You really don’t like closed-in spaces, do you?”
“Not really.” He swallowed, feeling silly.
“Maybe you just need to have a distraction. Something to take your mind off it.”
There was a silky quality to her voice that made his nerve endings stand to attention. “Lizzie,” he said quietly.
“Shhh.” She put her finger against his lips and slid the last few inches, until her body whispered against his. He couldn’t help but look down at her lips, slightly parted, shadowed in the dimness of the cave, only a shaft of daylight providing any visibility. Her eyes glowed up at him and that little half smile flickered at the side of her mouth, a playful invitation.
“You want to keep this private. What’s more private than kissing in a cave in the middle of nowhere?” Her voice was husky-soft.
“Private … look, Lizzie. It’s just … it’s a small town. If we…” He hesitated. “If we see each other in plain sight, there are loads of people who will think it’s their place to interfere.”
“So it’s not because you’re ashamed of being seen with me?”
He lifted his head sharply, hitting it on the hard rock behind them. “Ouch!” He felt the spot with his fingers as he stared at her. “What? Of course not! Lizzie, I—”
“Relax,” she said, laughing. “I haven’t been in town long, Josh, but I’m smart enough to figure things out. Your family’s pretty focused on pairing you up. If they knew about this afternoon…”
“Right,” he agreed, relieved. The last thing he wanted was for Lizzie to feel slighted in any way. “Lizzie, I like you. A lot. But we both know what this is, and what it isn’t.”
“And there’s nothing wrong with keeping that to ourselves.”
“Exactly.”
“And at some point you’re going to be quiet long enough for me to kiss you again.”
He nearly swallowed his tongue at the sultry tone in her voice. And he let her have the last word, since the next sound from her lips was a soft moan as she curled her hand around his head and pulled it down so that their mouths meshed together, hot and hungry.
* * *
The boat ride back to town was definitely better, though Lizzie had been dreading it a bit, worried she’d get sick again. Instead the fresh air was invigorating and she took out her hair elastic and let the wind blow her hair off her face. A check of her phone told her it was early evening, and the sky had softened into shades of coral, pink, and lilac. The breeze was cool, and Josh handed her a sweatshirt to pull on. It was two sizes too big and smelled like him.
Jewell Cove appeared on the horizon and, with it, reality. Lizzie sat back against the padded seat and thought about today. Rationally, she and Josh had both needed to get away, to blow off some steam. And they were safe for each other, she realized. Because she was only here temporarily. Josh didn’t want anything major. And neither did she. And yet … being together today had been good.
And it was over. They certainly couldn’t be that free here in town, with a hundred pairs of eyes watching their every move.
“You’re quiet all of a sudden,” Josh observed, the engine noise a slight purr now as he pulled into the dock.
She hadn’t really said much the whole trip back, but she knew the last few minutes she’d been quiet in a different way that was entirely related to mood and he’d sensed that.
“Reality check,” she said, straightening.
“Yeah,” he agreed, and he sounded as excited about it as she did. That was something, at least.
Could they ignore everything that had happened today? Rewind to a few days ago and keep things entirely professional? Maybe it was time she tried that. It was what she should have done with Ian—
Her cheeks heated. She’d done exactly what she’d sworn she’d never do again. Get involved with a coworker. With a boss. No matter how she and Josh justified it or said it was different, it really wasn’t. Monday morning they’d be in the same office seeing patients and pretending that she hadn’t been … oh God. That she hadn’t been sprawled naked beneath him on a sandy beach in the middle of the afternoon.
“Regrets?” he asked, easing his way along the dock to keep the boat from bumping.
“Honestly?” She reached out and kept the side from hitting the dock. “Yes and no. Josh, this afternoon was—”
“Awesome.”
“Well, yes.” She smiled a little. “But now that we’re back—”
“Awkward.”
“Potentially.”
He tied up the boat, got out, and offered her a hand up. She took it, liking the feeling of his fingers around hers a little too much. She hopped up on the wharf and noticed how it felt very different beneath her feet. Solid, but like she was still moving.
“Know what was great about today?” Josh asked, going back into the boat for her bag. He looked up at her and grinned. “You stopped thinking so much.”
“Occupational hazard.”
He laughed, and her insides got all warm. “Don’t I know it,” he responded. “The thing is … I don’t think we have to decide everything right at this moment. We can just figure it out as we go along.”
She took the bag from his hand. “See, I’m not as good at that with my professional life. Winging it, that is.”
Josh’s gaze touched hers. “You really are a study in contradictions, you know that? The first day I saw you at the office, you struck me as so uptight and … well … snobby. But I think now that’s your business face. Am I right?”
She shrugged. “You might be.”
“And which version of Lizzie do you like most?”
It was an impossible question to answer. There was a level of expectation associated with her job. Maybe more so because she was Russ Howard’s daughter. Plus she was a bit of a perfectionist. Scratch that. A lot of a perfectionist. It was hard to let go of the idea that she didn’t actually have to be top-of-the-heap.
And yet today, wandering Lovers’ Island with Josh … It had been simple. Lovely. Liberating.
He stood close, close enough that he could have taken her hand if he’d wanted to, but he didn’t. Probably because they’d both agreed that they wouldn’t. “I know what it’s like to have to be two different people.” His voice was rough, honest. “I’ve done that every single day since I came back home. Today I got to be myself. Even if nothing else happens, Lizzie, I want to thank you for that.”
Her throat tightened at the plain honesty in his voice. “For me, too, Josh,” she whispered. “I’ve been so wound up with my family situation and my leave of absence, I forgot what it was like to just let loose for a few hours. I’m glad you invited
me. Glad we…” She couldn’t look up at him. “Just glad. I had a good time.”
“Next time we’ll make sure you don’t get sick,” he said, stepping back. And she finally lifted her eyes.
There was humor in his, and acceptance, and affection. And God, he had no idea how much she liked seeing it there. He probably didn’t realize that other than Charlie, he was the first and only person to see the real Lizzie in the last few years. And that included Ian.
“Next time?”
And a different light blazed in Josh’s eyes. “Oh, I think so. Don’t you?”
She wanted to say no, almost as badly as she wanted to say yes. The truth was somewhere in the middle, and she knew he was right. They were going to have to feel their way through this. Carefully.
“We’ll see, won’t we?” she answered.
“You’re catching on.” He winked. “You’re good to get home now? I’ve got to get these fish out of the live well and get them cleaned up.”
“Oh, right.” This really was the end of the day, then. “Josh?”
“Yeah?”
“Thank you. I needed a day away more than you know.”
“Oh,” he replied, giving a half nod. “I know. Believe me.”
He hopped back aboard and untied the rope. “See you around, Dr. Howard.”
“Likewise, Dr. Collins.”
She stood on the dock and watched as he pushed away, then slowly inched out of the harbor, going left toward what she assumed was his house and private mooring. Not that she would know what either of those looked like.
Because Josh liked keeping his private life private, too.
CHAPTER 12
Sliding back into a work groove wasn’t as difficult as Lizzie anticipated, and she had mixed feelings about it. Her female vanity kind of wished it were a little harder for Josh to keep things platonic, but it did make things easier on a professional level. It was Josh who set the tone on the first morning, pouring her a coffee and throwing her a smile but then disappearing into his office before seeing the first patients of the day. At work, he treated her with the same deference and intimacy as he did Robin. And Robin, Lizzie reminded herself with a bit of irritation, was married with a kid or two. It had been over a week since Josh and Lizzie’s trip to the island, and it was like nothing had ever happened. She wasn’t sure if he’d changed his mind about the “next time” thing or if he was waiting for her to make the next move.
