She smiled at the sound of his rich voice when he picked up.
“Hey there stranger. So glad you called before leaving for the other side of the world.”
“Aww, come on. It’s not for long … just three months.”
He teased, “Three months of Italian food, wine, and men chasing you down. Yeah, I’d better come out there sooner than later”
“The only man I want to chase me down is you. I already miss you. And to be honest,” she divulged, “It scares me.”
Timothy’s heart soared. To know she was feeling the same way made him the happiest man on the earth. He breathed in, wishing he could kiss her.
“I’m already missing you and trust me … that scares me just as much. I really care about you sweet Chastity, and I would be stupid not to tell you before you get on that plane.”
She sat in silence as her heart swelled.
Sweet Chastity! For the first time she was at a loss for words.
“Chastity? You still there?”
“Yeah,” she sighed. “I just wish I could see you right now. Between my uncle’s letter and your words … I’m just gettin’ teary. Man, I’m such a girl!” she chastised herself.
Timothy laughed wholeheartedly, and let his emotions get the best of him. Before he knew what he was saying, he blurted out, “That’s what I love about you.”
Immediately, he wished he could hit a rewind button.
She sat in awe at his declaration, but decided to brush it off as simple conversation. Everyone throws that word around from time to time, so she wasn’t going to look any deeper than that. What she didn’t realize is that Timothy wasn’t one of those that used that word lightly. When he said the word ‘love’, it should be taken with care.
He quickly changed the subject, trying to mask his flub.
“You said you got a letter from your uncle. What’s up?”
In stride, she caught him up to speed on Jesse’s bombshell.
“I’m not sure what to do now. Do I open the letter from this man, who wants to be my dad, or do I burn it?” She asked in hopes he’d have an answer for her.
“I wish I could tell you what to do. Wow, I don’t think I can help you there, but you’ll know when you’re ready.” He paused, “I can tell you one thing that might make you happy … I hope.”
“Just talking to you makes me happy.”
“Me too,” he continued. “I slipped a little envelope into your journal when I was in town this past weekend. It was the last of my official business with you.”
“So it wasn’t a love note then,” she teased, slightly disappointed.
Hearing the dip in her voice, he knew he needed to get on that soon.
“No, but you’ll get a couple of those in the next couple months. Actually - what I left you was a letter to you from your mom.” He paused, unsure of how she’d react. “She instructed me to slip it to you when you left for your someday trip. I was to either mail it to you or get it to you in person … she left the choice up to me.”
“What?” She sat there in a stupor. “Nothing my mother ever does should amaze me anymore, but I wouldn’t have guessed this.”
“Are you upset with me? I was hoping it would be a good surprise. I was going to let you find it in your journal, when you brought it with you on your trip. But … after you mentioned the letter from your dad, I figured you need this one. It’s a letter you’ll want to open for sure.”
“No, you did the right thing,” she reassured him. “So she was hoping or guessing that we’d still be in touch?”
“Well, she wasn’t specific. She only said to get it to you in preparation of your someday trip. She said I could mail it … or deliver it in person. I remember her smiling when she added that last part and never understood why until just now.”
“She was hoping you’d keep in contact with me.” She giggled. “She was matchmaking.”
“It seems she was. At least we know we have her blessing. That’s got to make you feel good.”
“You have no idea … she never trusted or approved of anyone. To know she trusted you with her legal situation, but also with me - it means the world. Thank you.”
“Don’t thank me. Thank your mom.”
She was overcome with so much emotion; she could hardly put a lid on it. In order to rein it in, she needed to cut the conversation short.
“Hey, I’ve got get to my gate, but I promise I’ll call when I land. Thanks again … for the letter.”
“I’m glad I told you now. I hope it makes you happy. Talk to you soon.”
After they hung up, she put her bags on the conveyor belt, and she made her way through security. She thought not only of her trip ahead, but also of the two letters stashed in her bag. Her life had always been out of the ordinary, but nothing compared to the craziness she’d been put through recently.
Only a few months ago, she was a poor college graduate with only one family member to call her own. Now, here she was traveling on her someday trip, with a letter from not one parent but two burning a hole in her bag … and a very expensive one at that. Plus, she had a handsome boyfriend waiting to visit her overseas.
She shook her head, thinking it sounded nothing short of an episode of one of Anne’s soap operas. It just goes to show how fast everything can flip in a heartbeat.
Right now, the only constant she had set in stone were her travel plans. Her hotel and art classes were confirmed, and she had a week to herself before her studies geared up. Her first mission was to visit as many museums and galleries as she could, in preparation.
She smiled as she imagined strolling down the Zattere walk in person, instead of just reading about it. She planned on painting by the canals and taking in all the local sights before her classes started.
She’d set her sights on taking this trip her whole life, and was determined that something like a letter, from John, wouldn’t spoil it. The exhilaration of the trip alone would be enough to eliminate any shadow, which was cast from his unopened letter.
Yes, there was a lot to keep her occupied in Venice - especially now that the romance of the city held such promise for her. She looked forward to what type of spell it would cast for them both.
Chapter 48
Waiting to board was the hardest part. She had a letter from her mom, when she should be sitting next to her instead. Chastity felt robbed of sharing this with the one person who’d helped her plan for it her whole life.
Even though it beckoned from within her carryon, she decided to wait to read her mom’s letter until she boarded. The last thing she needed was to break down before she got on the plane, with an entire airport as an audience. She hoped to have some privacy in first class.
Unsure, she reached for her carry-on to peek inside. Yep, mom’s journal is still there. Even though she remembered packing last night, she needed to make sure.
She gingerly reached inside to open the back cover. Her heart ached in seeing the envelope, with her name scrawled in her mother’s handwriting. To keep from tearing up, she quickly pushed the journal back inside.
Chastity had only three entries left. Since she wasn’t ready to let go of her mom, she’d taken a long break from it - saving the last entries for when she was in dire need to hear her words.
With all the commotion in her life in that last couple of weeks, she’d not slowed down enough to feel the need to read anything. But today of all days, she she’d have the time and the desire to feel close to her.
How she wished she could tell her mom about Timothy and how important he had become to her. Suddenly, the urge to call her mom hit once more. She reached for her cell, stopping short of dialing her mom’s number.
How many times will I do that? Aggravated, she dialed Cheryl instead, who picked up almost immediately.
“Hey there, you ready to board yet?”
“Almost. I needed to call mom,” Chastity sighed. “And since I can’t … I did the next best thing.”
“Aw, I’m so sorry s
weetheart. I know it’s hard. I still feel the need to call my mom and it’s been fifteen years.”
Chastity groaned. “Gee thanks. Something to look forward to.”
Cheryl sadly smiled to herself. “Hey, it gets better. I promise. At least you have family left.”
She knew it was an attempt to make her feel better, but it didn’t.
“This trip is a bittersweet one, and the bitter of it is getting to me right now.” She fought the tears, which threatened to come. “Mom knew I’d take this trip someday … so did I. I just didn’t know she wouldn’t be here to see it.”
“Oh honey, don’t you think she sees it? She’s with you always. She knew when she died that you’d be taking it soon, and she looked forward to it. There isn’t anything that would stand in her way or keep her from seeing you in Venice.”
Chastity couldn’t fight the tears this time, and didn’t care if anyone in the airport saw. She didn’t even try to wipe them away, as they steadily flowed down each cheek.
Cheryl heard her sniffle and knew. She waited before saying, “You know, I think God allows those, who have passed, to visit loved ones for a short time. I feel my mom with me at certain times of the year … my birthday, her birthday, the anniversary of her death. Any moment in life that would have special meaning, and if this moment isn’t special between the two of you—I don’t know what is.”
Chastity drew a deep breath in, grateful to Cheryl and her wisdom. “Yours and my mom’s faith has always amazed me. I’m not perfect … far from it, but I always have that to keep me from going too far astray. I certainly hope you’re right that she’s able to see this. I know I’ve felt her at certain times, like when I read her journal or when I’ve had a deep sleep and dreamt of her. When I woke up, it was like she was there.”
“Honey, she probably was.”
Chastity nodded her head in agreement and took a few moments to compose before speaking.
“Did you know that Timothy is coming to Venice to see me?”
“No! That’s great honey. So things are good?”
“So good it’s scary. I think I’m in love with him and don’t know what to do with that.”
Cheryl laughed whole-heartedly and said, “Well, if his mom knowing about you is any indication, I’d bet he feels the same way.”
“What?” Chastity yelped. “Why didn’t you tell me?”
“I only just found out. She called me yesterday, and you should have heard her. She was furious with me for not telling her that you stayed with me, and embarrassed from gushing about from his last visit. When you were in town, she went on and on about Timothy’s visit and how secretive he was being. I remember her saying he had big news and couldn’t wait to call me back with it.” She chuckled.
“Hmm, well what you know?” Chastity finally smiled. “Did you get into too much trouble from her?”
“Heck no. She just asked why I didn’t tell her the first time to keep her from going on and on, and I just told her it wasn’t my secret to tell. That pretty much ended the conversation. She won’t call again until she is sure she has news to spread that I’m not privy too.”
Chastity chuckled and added, “Well Auntie, you’ll have to let me know of any new developments with my boyfriend.”
“Will do, sweetie.”
“I talked to Jesse last night before I went to bed.”
“I’m so glad you’ve begun connecting with him. It was a scary thought at first, but it’s turned out.”
“Yeah, it has. He sent me a letter with another letter in it.”
“Okay,” she said slowly, unclear of the meaning.
“In his letter was another envelope, from John.” Chastity felt weird saying his name.
“Oh, my gosh! How could he?”
“No, it was good that he did.” Chastity explained Jesse’s motives and how torn he was with what to do with John’s letters.
“So, how did that make you feel to have a letter from … him?
“Okay, Ms. Shrink.”
“Seriously. What are you going to do with it?”
“I put in my purse, where it’ll stay until I figure out how I feel about it. For now, I don’t want to read it. If I ever do … I don’t see responding to him.” She held firm.
“Well, honey. You’re a big girl and you’ll figure it out, but I’m glad that you’re not ready yet.”
“Timothy also left me a letter.”
“Aw. Was it mushy?”
“Well, it was from mom. He slid it in my journal so I’d find it on my trip.”
“That sweet Kylie. I knew she was writing something to you, but I never mentioned it. Since I never found a letter in the house when we cleaned it out, I figured it was gone. I didn’t want to upset you with the idea of a lost letter. I’m glad she found a way to get it to you … I should have figured.”
“If it weren’t for the fact that I think she was trying to make sure Timothy stayed in touch with me, I’d wonder why she didn’t use you as her messenger.” Chastity heard them call for her flight. “Hey, I see passengers lining up.”
She grabbed her gear, and stood.
“I hope you have a great trip. Please call me when you get there, so I won’t worry.”
“I promise,” Chastity said before hanging up.
She turned her phone off in preparation for her flight and walked toward her gate.
Chapter 49
Slowly, the plane ascended through the clouds and broke at their cruising altitude. Chastity knew it would be hours before they landed, so she planned ahead. She packed books, Benadryl, and her iPod.
Sparing no expense, she went first class. The longest trip she ever took was half way across the U.S., not half way across the world. This time, she made sure to be comfortable the entire way.
Luckily for her, no one was sitting next to her this time.
No chatty chica’s … it’s just me and mom’s letter, she thought, ignoring the fact that another letter was weighing her purse down.
She reached for the journal and placed it in the seat next to her, trying to decide what to read first, her mom’s letter or the rest of the journal.
“Champagne?” The flight attendant interrupted her thoughts.
“Yes, please,” she said, as she pulled out her wallet.
“It’s compliments of the airline.” She smiled warmly, and handed Chastity her glass.
Free? “Thank you so much.” Chastity sipped it before setting it down. Mmm. Sweet.
“Is this your first time?”
“Flying? Almost … it’s my third.” She responded, not understanding.
“In first class?” The flight attendant clarified and smiled.
“Oh.” She nervously laughed. “Yeah, you can tell huh?”
“Well, asking how much the champagne is - was is a dead give away,” she responded with a quick wink.
The flight attendant pointed to the DVD player in front of Chastity’s chair.
“This is yours to watch any of the movies we’ve got playing. You’ve got a few to choose from. Your seat will fully recline, so you can get a comfortable night’s sleep. And if you’re a light sleeper, we’ve got sound reducing headsets and eye masks.”
Chastity raised her eyebrows with a look of approval.
“Oh if you’re impressed with that …” she continued to explain. “Just wait until we bring out your dinner. You’ll never fly coach again.”
“Do you have anything chocolate?” She asked, with a mischievous grin.
“Oh honey … only the best money can buy. I think we even have white chocolate mousse for dessert. You just let me know if there’s anything you need, and I will be happy to take care of you Ms. Wayne.”
She knows my name too? “Thank you so much.” So far, her someday was looking pretty good. In that moment, she knew her mother was smiling down on her.
This is the trip we’ve planned our whole … my whole life. Minus the first class part, but no matter … I’m on my way, mom.
Chastity closed her eyes and rested her head long enough to feel the peace that was centering in her chest. When she opened them, she focused on her mom’s journal and lifted her glass to salute it.
She drained the rest of her champagne and reached for her mom’s letter. The last few entries of the journal would keep for the future. For now, she knew it was important to hear her mother’s words in this moment.
She gingerly unfolded the paper, which held her mother’s last imparting wisdom, but couldn’t focus on any of it, as the tears had already started welling up and dropping down her cheeks. The stewardess came by to refill her glass and drop off a pack of tissues, saying nothing as Chastity began to dab her eyes.
My dearest Chaz,
By now you must know our whole story … my story. I could spend this time telling you how sorry I am that I wasn’t brave enough to trust you. I could spend this time begging your forgiveness, and I do want that … your forgiveness. But, I am only going to spend this time with you to tell you how proud I am of you.
If I timed this right, you’re either about to go on your someday trip … or you’re on it already. I left instructions with my lawyer to deliver this to you right before you made your way. I hope you’re on a plane right now … on your way.
Of course you’ve always been on your way. I always knew you’d make it someday to being exactly what you wanted to be. You’re a force to be reckoned with my darling daughter, and I knew nothing could stand in your way.
Chaz … I’ve loved you more than life itself, but I never knew how to express that love except through fear, which wasn’t fair to you. I just hope I didn’t screw you up too much. I hope you understand that everything I did … I did for you.
You know you never really know about life until you experience having a child and being responsible for another little person … a life force that came from your own existence. It’s hard to explain that to someone who doesn’t have a child, but one day you will and you’ll know what I mean. You’ll know that having someone completely dependent on you is the most scary but amazing experience in life. It’s a love and a duty like none other.
Finding Kylie Page 21
