by Kitty Neale
‘I think it is. Look at Thomas, he’s as pleased as punch with his life, and it’s about time he realised that we’re not. He waltzed in here, full of his so-called good news, and didn’t even notice that I’m dreadfully upset.’
Thomas frowned and sat down. ‘No, I’m sorry, I didn’t. What’s wrong?’
Celia pulled out a handkerchief and dabbed her eyes for effect. ‘Jeremy has just told me that after your wedding, he’s leaving. He’s going abroad again.’
‘But why?’ Thomas asked, looking at his brother now.
‘Jeremy won’t tell you why, but I will,’ Celia choked emotionally. ‘You need to put yourself in his place, imagine how it would feel if your brother owned a family business that should in part be yours.’
‘As I’ve said to you before, Jeremy wasn’t here when Dad left so he passed it on to me.’
‘I know, but in all fairness you can redress that now,’ Celia said.
‘It’s all right, Tom, I don’t expect you to give me a share of the business,’ Jeremy said. ‘You took it on, built it up, and you deserve to reap the profits. It’s just that I find it a little humiliating to be employed by my kid brother so decided it’s time I left.’
Thomas lowered his head, saying nothing, and putting a finger to her lips, Celia indicated to Jeremy that he should be quiet. It had been clever of him to say that he didn’t expect a share in the business, and from what she could see it had given Thomas food for thought.
At last he raised his head. ‘It would break Mum’s heart if you leave and I’d like you to stay too. If you do I’ll give you a share in the business, but none of the financial profit for this coming year because you’re right, they’re down to me. However, despite what Mum thinks, I have been giving some thought to your role as a salesman. You’ll have to learn more about the business to be able to give estimates, but next year you’ll get a share of the profits too.’
‘Thomas, that sounds wonderful,’ Celia enthused. ‘What do you think, Jeremy?’
‘Well, it’s certainly an incentive to stay,’ he said, then stayed quiet for a moment, as if mulling it over. ‘All right, Tom, I’m happy with your terms, and don’t worry, once I’ve learned the ropes I’ll bring in plenty of new business.’
‘With a share in the company, I won’t be able to sack you if you don’t,’ Tom said, though smiling.
‘What sort of share are we talking about?’ Jeremy asked.
‘How about thirty-three per cent?’
‘Thomas, it should be half,’ Celia protested.
‘No, Mother, I’m happy with that,’ Jeremy said.
‘Good,’ Thomas said, ‘but with the amount of work coming in at the moment, and my wedding looming, if you don’t mind waiting we’ll get the legal stuff sorted out after that.’
‘Yes, that’s fine,’ Jeremy agreed.
Celia was less than pleased. She’d have liked the formalities dealt with before the wedding, but she’d learned that Thomas wouldn’t be pushed, and if one tried he would stubbornly dig his heels in. That was something Amy would find out if she tried to put a stop to Jeremy getting a share of the business. Not that Celia was really worried, because despite the things she’d told Jeremy about Amy, in reality she saw the girl as weak, easily intimidated, and inferior.
Jeremy surreptitiously winked at her, and Celia wondered why he was content with less than fifty per cent of the business. It didn’t take her long to work it out and she was pleased by Jeremy’s cleverness, sure now that he could outwit Thomas. Given time Jeremy would ensure that she got a share in the firm, an equal one, and with sixty-six per cent between them they would gain control.
It was perfect, she thought, her financial future would be assured, and instead of Thomas lording it over them, he would have to dance to their tune.
Chapter Thirty-Five
Amy found time flying past. It was a lovely spring day, the weather clement, and things had changed at work. For the past month she’d had Saturdays off and had loved it, happy to forgo her Thursday half days. On her final half day off she had bumped into Miss Winters again, and had been persuaded to join her for a coffee. Once again Amy had felt sorry for her former manageress, feeling that she was lonely, and had impulsively invited her to the wedding. Miss Winters had graciously declined, but wished her every happiness before they parted, that being the last time Amy had seen her.
It was a Saturday morning now and Amy was waiting for the delivery van to arrive. Though the house had been newly decorated, they had to furnish it, so when Tommy could spare the time they chose everything from the G-plan range. When the van turned up Amy saw curtains twitching, but ignored them as it was unloaded and her new furniture carried inside.
‘What do you think, Mum?’ she said, standing back to admire the light oak cabinet, with black lacquered panels. It had open shelves, along with a built-in cocktail cabinet and a space for a television set.
‘It’s very modern, but it’s nice, and that drop-leaf dining table set is lovely too.’
‘The light oak matches the cabinet,’ Amy pointed out.
‘Now I like that,’ Phyllis remarked as a pale green and black settee was carried in and uncovered, along with two matching chairs.
Amy had been worried that the room would look too full, but now that everything was in place, she thought it looked lovely. ‘There’s just the bedroom furniture to unload now.’
‘Is that G-plan too?’ her mother asked.
‘Yes, Tommy insisted on it. He said it’s good quality and made to last.’
‘If he can afford this lot, that business of his must be making a fair few bob.’
‘Yes, I think it is.’
‘Does Tommy still want you to give up your job?’
‘Yes, but I’m not sure. He works long hours, and I’m a bit worried that I might get bored if I’m at home every day.’
‘I’d say make the most of it, because once a baby comes along there’ll be no chance of that.’
‘It’s a bit too soon to be talking about a baby. I’m not married yet.’
‘Well once you are, don’t take too long about it. I can’t wait to be a grandmother.’
‘I’ll do my best,’ Amy said, yet she had no idea what that side of marriage was like. When she was in Tommy’s arms, he aroused passionate feelings that left her wanting more, yet they had somehow managed to restrain themselves.
Not for much longer, Amy thought, there was just one week to go and then she’d be Tommy’s wife.
‘Mum, I know you haven’t been before, but you should come and see our house now that the furniture has been delivered,’ Thomas said when he came home that night.
Celia had no interest in seeing a pokey house at the bottom of the Rise, even if her son was going to live in it. ‘I still think you were mad to rent it, especially as you’ll be living next door to your in-laws.’
‘That won’t be a problem. I get on well with Amy’s parents.’
‘You won’t think that once they start to interfere, especially Amy’s mother.’
‘She won’t do that and we’ll be fine,’ Thomas said offhandedly.
‘You always dismiss my concerns as though they count for nothing,’ she snapped.
‘We managed to take an hour off work today to have the final fittings on our suits,’ Jeremy intervened. ‘Of course, I fancied a light blue waistcoat and matching cravat to go with mine, but Tom vetoed that idea.’
‘It’d be a bit much for a registry office,’ Tommy said.
‘If you’d chosen to get married in a church, Jeremy could have been your best man,’ Celia complained. ‘Instead it’s this paltry little affair, but I’m not lowering my standards. I’m wearing an apricot coloured silk suit and matching hat.’
‘Yes, I’ve seen your outfit and you’ll knock them out,’ Jeremy said.
‘Thank you, dear,’ Celia said, pleased, yet wondering now if she should have bothered. There’d be nobody of breeding to impress, either at the registry office or
the reception, despite it being held in the cousin’s huge house, one that she had persuaded her rich husband to buy.
Money couldn’t buy class though, and Celia dreaded to think what food would be served, probably something like jellied eels. She shuddered at the thought.
Tommy was glad that Jeremy had placated their mother by changing the subject to their suits and her outfit. Jeremy had a way with her, and since he’d come home life had been a lot easier. With both her sons around
her now, she’d become less possessive of him, Tommy thought, and she was a lot more amenable when it came to Amy.
Though still inexperienced when it came to the glazing business, Jeremy was learning and Tommy didn’t regret offering him a share in the business. He’d baulked at the idea at first, thinking that he’d been the one who had built it up, but then decided he was being selfish and unfair. Jeremy was his big brother, and by rights the firm should have gone to him. It was great to think that by taking him on board, Jeremy would always be around now, the two of them eventually able to take the business to new heights. With new towns springing up out of London and vast swathes of houses being built, the possibilities of even larger contracts beckoned.
‘When you get up to speed with calculating estimates, I think you’ll be able to try your hand as a salesman,’ Tommy said, with the new towns in mind.
‘I’ll look forward to that, though of course I’ll need a car.’
‘When you’re ready you’ll get one,’ Tommy said, thinking that it was about time he got himself a car too. With the wedding looming it would have to wait for now, but
the accounts were looking very healthy, despite the expenditure on furnishing the house.
One week, he thought, and then Amy would be his wife. When he looked at her, sometimes he couldn’t believe his luck, but Amy had chosen him and he couldn’t wait to spend the rest of his life with her.
Mabel wasn’t so happy as she lay in bed, going over the events of the day. She’d seen the furniture van arrive that morning, and was still fuming that Amy had been given the house next door to Phyllis. As she’d told Edna, with the place being done up it smacked of favouritism, not that she begrudged that when it came to Amy – it was Phyllis getting everything that got on her wick. Thanks to Rose, Phyllis had the life of Riley now, a house full of posh stuff and a well-paid job too.
‘Can’t you stop tossing and turning?’ Jack complained. ‘I’ve got an early start in the morning and you’re keeping me awake.’
‘All right, keep your hair on,’ Mabel snapped, but then the heart of the matter hit her and she felt tears flooding her eyes. She’d tried to deny it – tried to act as though she didn’t care, but in truth Mabel was heartbroken that she wouldn’t be at Amy’s wedding. She’d watched the girl grow up and was fond of her, but now because of her big mouth neither Amy nor Phyllis would give her the time of day. It was her own fault, Mabel knew that – knew that because of her obsession with gossip she had lost her best friend.
Sleep wouldn’t come, and as always a feeling of self-hate filled Mabel’s mind. If she’d acted sooner, if she’d done something differently, her beautiful boy might have lived. Though she’d been told that nothing could have saved him, Mabel still thought she had been a terrible mother, and it was only when she could find someone to talk about – someone who was less than perfect too – that she could feel a little better about herself.
Carol was feeling bad about herself too, and unable to sleep, she got up to make herself a milky drink. The flat they were renting in Chelsea was on the fourth floor of a tall, terraced house in Tedworth Square, which was in an area that sat between the King’s Road and Royal Hospital Road. She had found another job as a receptionist, the boys were working too, and they had all settled well.
‘What’s the matter? Can’t you sleep?’
Carol was about to pour milk into a small saucepan and was startled by the voice. ‘Oh, Mum, you made me jump.’
‘Sorry, but I heard you getting up.’
‘I didn’t mean to wake you,’ Carol said. ‘I tried to be quiet and crept out of our room as quietly as I could.’
‘Don’t worry, I wasn’t asleep.’
‘Do you want a milky drink too?’
‘Yes please, and I can guess why you’re not sleeping. You’ve lost your dad, and it’s going to take time to get over it.’
‘It isn’t Dad that’s keeping me awake.’
‘What is it then?’
‘Amy is getting married next week and I should be there. I feel rotten about the way I treated her.’
‘You were protecting me, I know that, but I feel awful that you were forced to move away.’
Carol shook her head. ‘You shouldn’t. We didn’t move just for your sake. It was for mine too.’
‘I don’t understand. What do you mean?’
It was time, Carol decided – time to tell her mother the truth. ‘I … I was raped and … and then I had an abortion. Nobody knew about it at first, only Dad, but then the gossips found out about it and soon everyone knew.’
‘Oh, Carol, I can’t believe you went through all that and I knew nothing about it. I’m sorry … so very sorry.’
‘Mum, please, don’t cry. Look at me, I got through it, and I’m fine now.’
‘I thought you were all grown up, and I waited until I felt you didn’t need me any more before I left. I was wrong, but I just couldn’t stand it any more.’
‘What couldn’t you stand?’ Carol asked. ‘You still haven’t told us.’
‘I can’t talk to you about it. You’re … you’re too young.’
‘I’m not an innocent any more, though God knows I wish I still was. I’ve been raped, and Dad tried it on with me too. I had to fight off my own father – so don’t tell me I’m too young.’
‘What! Your father! Oh no … no, I’ll never forgive myself for leaving now. I know he adored you and when you used to get dressed up with all that make-up on, I used to worry about something in his eyes when he looked at you, but I never thought for a moment that you’d be in any danger, that … he … he’d …’ she sobbed, unable to go on.
‘You used to nag me about my clothes and make-up. I thought it was because you were jealous of me.’
‘Jealous! No, no, never that,’ she protested.
‘Mum, you still haven’t told me why you walked out on Dad.’
Daphne dashed her hands over her face to wipe away the tears, and then said, ‘When it came to se … sex, your father was like an animal. It was night after night, and he’d never take no for an answer. He’d hold me down, force me, and … and after years of what felt like torture, I just couldn’t take any more.’
‘Oh, Mum, I didn’t know,’ Carol moaned, horrified at what her mother had endured.
‘When I left, I found a small bedsit out of the area in Putney, and a job in a bar. I was going to write to you and the boys, but then one of the customers grabbed me and I just lost it. I picked up the nearest thing to hand, a bottle, and hit him over the head with it. I didn’t even realise what I’d done until I saw him lying on the floor, unconscious, and bleeding.’
‘You told us this much before, but now you’ve told me about Dad I can understand why you reacted like that. It all makes sense, yet it must have been a nightmare when you were sent to prison.’
‘I think I just shut down, switched off, and at least I didn’t have to serve the whole nine months.’
‘Your letter to Dad was found on him when … when his body was discovered. The boys got hold of it when they went to pick up his belongings. I’m just glad we found you before you got out. But what about Gran, did she know you were in prison?’
‘Yes, when I wrote to your Dad, I sent her a letter too and I begged them both not to tell you or the boys that I was in prison. I hoped to serve my time and write to you when I got out, making some excuse for not getting in touch before.’
‘You didn’t need to hide it from us.’
‘I was so ash
amed, Carol.’
‘You’ve got nothing to be ashamed of.’
‘Neither have you. We’re both victims.’
‘I’m so glad we’ve talked like this, Mum. It’s made me feel that I can move on – that I can put it all behind
me now.’
‘You’re forgetting one thing.’
‘Am I?’
‘What about Amy? You said you feel terrible about the way you treated her, but you can do something about that. Go to see her, tell her you’re sorry, and if I know Amy she’ll forgive you in an instant.’
‘I don’t want to go back to Lark Rise or anywhere near it. One look at me and the gossips will be off again and if they find out about you …’
‘If you feel so strongly about it, write to Amy. You could suggest meeting somewhere, even here. Amy doesn’t have to know I’ve been in prison and if you think about it, neither does anyone else. I’ll just tell her that I was unhappily married and on your father’s death I decided to return home.’
‘Yes, of course, why didn’t I think of that before?’
‘As I said, you and the boys were trying to protect me, but there’s really no need. I’ll tell Paul and Davy the same, and if anyone sees me when I go to visit your gran I’ll hold my head up high, keep my mouth shut, and they can think what they like.’
‘That’ll drive them mad.’
‘Good, but to be honest, even if they find out, words can’t hurt me, or you – unless you let them. Those narrow-minded bigots haven’t lived our lives so they’re in no position to judge us,’ Daphne said, then yawning.
‘Well now, I don’t know about you, but I think I can sleep now.’
‘Yes, me too,’ Carol said, happier now as she followed her mother into their bedroom. They hoped to find a larger flat, but for now this would do. They had single beds, and so did the boys, though Dave was always complaining about how loudly Paul snored.
Carol snuggled down in her bed. She’d write to Amy tomorrow, and send her a present. It was doubtful that the parcel would arrive before her wedding, but after that they’d be able to meet up. Smiling at the thought, Carol at last drifted off to sleep.
