“We hardly know each other.”
“Then we’ll spend time getting to know each other. And once you know me better you’ll come to trust me.”
“But you like this stuff.” She waved her hand around. “And I really don’t think I’ll be any good at it.”
He thought over her words. The fact that she hadn’t said she didn’t like it or didn’t want to engage in BDSM was a good sign. He wasn’t certain why she even thought she had to be good at it. No one expected her to be perfect.
“There’s no real right or wrong.”
“There isn’t?”
“It’s not so black and white. Each couple is different. Some enjoy high protocol.” He nodded over at a slightly-built Domme dressed in a tight, black corset and long, tight, black pants standing at the bar chatting to the bartender. A male sub sat at her feet, his head lowered, his body language peaceful. “Others are more casual. Some people enjoy pain, others don’t. There’s a whole range of people here and no matter what their kink—within reason, there are some things we don’t allow—it doesn’t matter. It’s all acceptable. So long as you and your Dom agree and know what each other wants out of your relationship, you can’t do this wrong. For instance, some Doms like brats, others don’t.”
“Do you?”
“Like a brat? Not really. Not unless it’s role play. I’m quite fond of naughty school girl and the teacher.”
Her eyes widened at that. “Really?”
“Yes, and if she was really naughty, I might have to order her to bend over my desk, pull up her too-short skirt and smack her ass with my ruler.”
“Yeah?” Her face was flushed, but not with embarrassment.
“Have you got any fantasies?” he asked in a low voice.
She shook her head frantically. So, she did have a few fantasies, she just wasn’t ready to divulge them.
“What about other role play?” she asked. “Is there anything else you enjoy?”
“Oh, I can think of plenty.”
Her eyes widened. “Like what?”
“There’s always the pirate and the naughty wench. That’s a classic. Or the Arabic prince and the naughty harem girl.”
Her heart was beating faster, her eyes wide, her body tense. It seemed she was very interested in role play.
He’d be all too happy to indulge her. And if it meant he got to spank that pert ass, well, that was just a bonus.
Chapter Ten
Why had she agreed to let him drive her home?
Because you were feeling weak. And damn turned on. Who could blame her? Gray was gorgeous, sexy, and protective. He was every girl’s fantasy man. And for some reason, he’d focussed his attention on her. She wasn’t sure why. She was nothing special. And, as Lyle had complained, boring as hell.
But he seemed to want her . . . if she could trust what he said.
Doubt filled her.
“You’re worrying too much,” he said as he drove his car through the streets of Dallas to her apartment. His car was just like him. Sleek, dark, and expensive.
“What sort of car is this?” she asked, running her hand over the inside of the door.
“A Maserati.”
A Maserati? Seriously? She didn’t know much about cars, but even she knew Maseratis were pricey. She snatched her hand back from the door. She’d probably leave some sort of mark, and it would take thousands of dollars to clean. That was just the sort of luck she had.
“You didn’t have to drive me home. I could have taken a cab.”
Now that they were away from the club, she was regretting her actions tonight. Especially what she’d revealed to Gray afterward. She seemed to recall talking about how gorgeous he was. And what a nice guy he was.
Jesus, Lacey.
He downshifted as he slowed to take a corner. Her heartbeat raced with a mix of nervousness and arousal.
“You really thought I’d let you take a cab home alone at night? I’m supposed to be watching over you, remember?”
“At the club. We’re not at the club anymore.”
“I’m still going to watch over you, Lacey. No more hiding from me, remember?”
“I’m not hiding.”
“No? You’re trying to shut me out.”
She bit back the denial, knowing it would be a lie.
“Good girl,” he told her.
“What?” She turned to him, startled.
“I could sense you wanted to protest, but we both know that would have been a lie, and I can’t stand lies. I had enough of those growing up. Just a little one, my mother would say, to spare someone’s feelings. But those little untruths can grow into big lies, and suddenly you don’t know what’s truth or deceit. I can deal with most things, but lying is one thing I can’t abide.”
She bit her lip. Technically, she hadn’t lied to him but she was hiding something. Something big.
“Is this your apartment building?”
Startled, she glanced out of the window. “Yep, this is where I live.”
“It’s a good neighborhood,” he commented.
“My best friend from college lives in Dallas. When I decided to move here, I researched all the safest neighborhoods’, then I asked Indie which one’s she thought were the best. We found this place. My apartment is at the back, on the fourth floor. People have to be buzzed into the building, and it has an alarm. It’s pretty safe here.”
She sensed him staring at her and turned. “So, thanks for the ride and um, everything.”
“I’m walking you up to your apartment.”
“You don’t have to. Ex-FBI, remember? I can take care of myself.” Although the last thing she wanted to do was walk out there in the dark. She grew tense just thinking about who could be watching from the shadows.
“I’m sure you can. But if I’m around, you don’t have to.”
Jesus, he was good.
He was out of the car before she could decide whether to protest further. He opened her door and leaned down, holding out his hand. With a slight hesitation, she reached up and grabbed hold, allowing him to pull her up. She stumbled a little, falling into him.
“Sorry,” she muttered, trying to pull back.
But he simply tucked her in tight and led the way to her apartment building. “Don’t be. I’m not.”
She unlocked the outer door. “I really will be okay from here.”
He cupped her cheeks between his hands. The outside of the building had several sensor lights that had come on as they’d approached the door, so she could easily see his face. His gaze was serious, his face stern. “There are a few things we need to get straight. One is that it doesn’t matter how capable or badass you are, I’m still going to protect you.”
She wasn’t a badass by any stretch of the imagination.
“I’m a gentleman. That means I open your car door. I walk you to your door. I check inside your apartment to make certain it’s safe. If you ever feel unsafe, I want to know. Immediately. If you’re in trouble, any sort of trouble whether it’s financial, physical, or emotional, I need to know. If you need something from me and you don’t tell me, then you’re in for a world of trouble.”
She stared at him throughout his speech, feeling her eyes go wide as saucers.
“And I think I’ve already made it clear I can’t stand lies. No doubt I’ve terrified you enough to make you run, but I want to explore these feelings between us, Lacey. I’ve never felt this way, this quickly, about anyone before and I don’t want any misunderstandings between us.”
She searched for what to say, but her brain was on overload. “I-I . . .” Shit. She couldn’t seem to get anything she was thinking out. “I don’t know what to say to any of that.”
“Just say Yes, Sir and then invite me into your apartment.”
“You want to come inside my apartment?”
“I do. Are you going to let me?”
She raised an eyebrow. “What? You mean I get a choice?”
“There’s always a choice, bab
So did she.
She led the way to her apartment, unlocking the door. He stepped inside first, which she thought was odd until she realized that if anyone was inside, they’d have to go through him to get to her. She wasn’t used to having someone protect her. Well, other than her cousins.
She quickly turned off the alarm before shutting the door. The two deadbolts engaged automatically. Gray eyed the deadbolts, nodding his approval. Well, she guessed he did own a business that specialized in security. His place was probably like Fort Knox.
He looked around her apartment. “I’m going to check the rest, okay?”
Before she could agree, he was gone. She rolled her eyes although that warm feeling of safety grew. She glanced around, trying to see her place through his eyes. It looked almost clinical. White walls, beige carpet, and cream-colored sofas that had come with the apartment. A few cheap pieces of art adorned the walls, and she’d put a bright throw over the back of the couch. But other than a TV and a photo of her with her cousins, that was pretty much it. Kind of sad.
“All clear.”
She gasped, startling as he spoke.
“Sorry, honey.” Reaching out, he grasped her arm, steadying her. “I didn’t mean to frighten you.”
“No, it’s okay. I was just thinking.”
“Must have been some heavy stuff to have you so deep in thought.”
“Not really.” She laughed. “Just thinking I’m not going to win any decorating awards anytime soon.”
He glanced around, as though seeing everything for the first time. But she knew that was a show. He noticed everything. “It’s simple. Clean.”
“Boring and clinical,” she added. “You can give it to me straight. But it’s probably an accurate reflection of the person who lives here.”
“You’re not boring and clinical.”
“No? All I’ve ever had is my work. First, school consumed my life. Then college. Then work. I don’t have many friends; I have no social life. Going to The Twisted Thorn tonight was the riskiest thing I’ve ever done.”
He raised one eyebrow. “That’s coming from the ex-FBI profiler.”
“I sat safely behind a desk most of the time.”
“What about counseling criminals? You can’t tell me that didn’t have some risk.” He frowned. “Not sure I like the idea of you being alone with someone who’s doing time, particularly for a violent crime.”
“I wasn’t ever really alone,” she told him. “I always had backup to call on. Not like tonight. Well, Cady was supposed to be my backup. That went very wrong. I hope she’s feeling okay.”
“I texted Hunter while you were in the bathroom at the club, and he said she’s fine.”
“That’s all he said?”
He shrugged. “It’s Hunter. He’s not one to elaborate. If it was serious, he’d tell me.”
Would he tell him if she was pregnant? She kept that thought to herself, that was Hunter and Cady’s business not hers.
She bit her lip, feeling nervous with him in her home. He wasn’t a huge guy, but he seemed to take up all the space in her small, one-bedroom apartment.
“Would you like coffee?” she blurted out. She’d started to move into the small kitchen before he’d even nodded. It was an open plan living space with a breakfast bar. She moved around the kitchen, making coffee as he took a seat on one of the stools.
“I got used to drinking it late at night when I was working a case. Now it doesn’t even seem to affect me. I think I must have caffeine in my veins. I actually get jittery if I don’t have a cup by ten.”
Okay, Lacey, stop talking now.
She cleared her throat as she placed the coffee in front of him. “Cream?”
“No, thanks, I take it black.”
“Me too.”
A slightly awkward silence ensued. “Tell me about your family.”
She startled, sloshing the hot liquid onto her hand. “Ouch.” She placed the mug down and shook her hand with a wince.
“Here.” Standing, he quickly moved around the counter. Grabbing her upper arm gently, he pulled her over to the sink and ran the cold water, holding her hand under the stream. “Hold it here for a few minutes, do you have a first-aid kit?”
“Yes, it’s in the cupboard beneath the bathroom sink. But it’s not that bad.”
“Better to be safe than sorry. I’ll go get it. Keep your hand there.” He grasped her chin, turning her head, so she had to look up at him. “I mean it.”
A shiver ran through her at the order in his voice. Damn, what was it about his commanding voice that turned her on? It was totally bizarre, but she wanted to obey him, please him.
When he returned, she was where he’d left her. He smiled and gave her a wink. “That’s my girl.”
A warm flush filled her. His girl.
Jesus, she needed to get a grip.
He pulled her hand out from under the stream of water before patting it gently dry and applying some burn medicine. She really didn’t think it was bad enough to need any doctoring. But having him pay such close attention to her was a heady feeling she wasn’t about to turn him away.
“Maybe we should pass on the coffee tonight.”
Disappointment filled her. He was leaving? He reached around and grabbed her other hand, leading her out of the small kitchen and over to the sofa.
“I know I should leave and let you get some sleep, but I find I’m just not ready to say good night.”
She smiled at him, feeling a little like a schoolgirl with her first crush, but she couldn’t help the silly grin that crossed her face as he sat and pulled her down next to him. He wanted to be with her. That needy part of her lapped up the attention even as she tried to warn herself to be cautious, go slowly.
“That’s you with your cousins, right?” he asked as he reached down and grabbed the photo of her with her with the guys that sat on the coffee table. When he sat back, he placed his arm around her shoulders, pulling her against him. She let out a silent sigh. She should ask him to go. It was late, and she was tired. But it just felt so good to snuggle in next to him. His scent enveloped her, spicy and strong. Her heart raced as desire filled her. What would she do if he turned around and leaned in? Would she kiss him?
Hell, yeah, she would.
“Yep, you know Travis, right?”
“Sure do.”
She pointed each cousin out. “That’s Jace, Tyler, Clay, and Rusty.”
“Did they live close by when you were growing up?”
She nodded. “We all lived in the same town. My father and their father were brothers, although they didn’t get along all that well. Their father died when Travis was about eighteen.”
“Your dad’s still alive?”
“Yeah, he just got remarried.”
“What about your mom?”
“I think it’s been about twenty-six years since she left us.”
“She died?”
“Oh, no, she’s in Florida. Married a dentist. He already had a couple of kids who are younger than me. She took them on as her own. Apparently, she’s quite a good mom to them.”
“She wasn’t a good mom to you?”
She shrugged, feeling uncomfortable. “She might have been at one point, before . . .”
“Before?”
She didn’t say anything. She couldn’t.
“Before your brother died?”
Lacey leaned away from him with a frown. “You know about Brax?”
“I did a background check on you. I do one on all our prospective employees. I found an old newspaper article about your brother’s death.”
She glanced down at her clenched hands in her lap.
“It must have been hard to lose your brother.”
“He was a lot older than me. I was just seven when he died. I was a surprise child to my parents, although I’m not sure I was a pleasant surprise.”
“I’m sure you were.”
She snorted. “Don’t be so sure. Brax was their golden boy, the one who could do no wrong. A saint.” And in their eyes, she would never be as wonderful as Brax. Never measure up, no matter how much she tried, no matter her achievements.
“Forgive me for saying this, but didn’t the coroner rule he’d been drinking and he was the one who was at fault?”
“My parents believe that the family of the other victim paid the coroner off. They even filed a complaint. Nothing came of it, of course.”
“I suppose they were looking for someone to blame since both parties died.”
“Oh, they had someone to blame. Me.”
He watched as her face grew dark, her shoulders hunching as she closed in on herself.
“Why would they blame you? You were a child.” Just seven. He couldn’t imagine how hard losing her brother must have been on her.
“I knew he was going to that party, that he’d snuck out of the house, but I didn’t say anything. Brax was wild. He was older than my cousins. My parents didn’t have much control over what he did, although they adored him. Maybe that was the problem, they let him get away with too much. Everybody loved Brax. All he’d have to do was smile that audacious grin, and people would just fall under his charm. Like how people flock to you with their worries, they’d be drawn to Brax. Not that he was interested in anyone else’s life, he was a bit too selfish for that. But he could be sweet and funny and kind when he wanted to be.” She shrugged. “He was a teenager. He could also be mean and rude and temperamental. But other people didn’t usually see that side of him.”
“Are you saying your parents blamed you for his death because you knew he was sneaking out of the house?”
“I caught him. There was a thunderstorm that night, and I was scared. My parents would always send me back to bed if I came to them so I would usually climb into bed with Brax. Only when I got to his room, he was sneaking out the window. He told me he’d buy me some candy the next day if I kept quiet. I would have kept quiet anyway, but I agreed. He kissed me on the cheek and then he was gone. I never saw him again. I crawled into his bed and didn’t wake up until the early hours of the morning when all hell broke loose. I can remember my father storming into Brax’s bedroom, shouting his name in despair. Instead of Brax, he found me there. He was so angry, I thought he might actually hit me.”
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