by Katie Knight
It was a pregnancy thing. She couldn’t help it if she currently resembled a smaller version of Dolly Parton. His reaction had been shock. That was all. They’d get past it, because, really. What other choice did they have?
After dressing in the sweatpants and T-shirt she’d picked out for nightwear, along with a pair of socks because her feet were always cold at night, she set about laying out their food for dinner. Demetri still hadn’t shown up again, which was fine by her. The more time she had to collect herself, the better.
Once she’d set out their containers of food and their drinks—looked like Demetri had gotten them each a bottle of water—on the small round table near the windows, she snuck a fry or two from his plate before sitting down before her chicken sandwich. The food looked good and before she could stop herself, she took a nibble of hers. Yummy. The coating on the chicken was slightly crunchy and salty and yet sweet at the same time, and the Italian dressing on her side salad was the perfect sour, vinegar-y foil.
She was halfway through her dinner when Demetri finally ventured back inside, his cheeks still a bit pink beneath his tan and his gaze still focusing on anything but her. It was then she realized that he was as nervous as she was about all this. The thought endeared him to her a tad bit more and she felt the need to put him at ease. She wiped her mouth with a napkin, then took a swig of water, while he futzed around with the duffel bag he’d brought along with him, transferring it from the Jeep to their new SUV—it was his go bag, he’d explained, in case of an emergency.
“Hey, come sit down and eat before your food gets cold,” Diana said. “Please. I’m sorry about earlier. I shouldn’t have yelled at you.”
“It’s fine. I should’ve knocked,” he said, coming over to slouch in his chair. “How’s the chicken?”
“Excellent. How’s your burger?”
“Haven’t tried it yet.” He opened up his container and took a huge bite of his sandwich, ketchup dripping down onto his chin. “Wow. That’s good.”
“Told you.” She smiled, stabbing more lettuce with her fork. “So, tell me what you’ve been up to the past couple of months.”
“Missions, mainly,” he said, his broad shoulders relaxing as they distanced themselves from the events at the tub. “Traveling a lot. Staying busy. I just got back to base a month ago. And you?”
“Same. Well, not the travel, but the work.” She told him about her kindergarten class and the day she’d bought her house. Then her throat had constricted as she’d remembered the place going up in flames earlier. “Man, I can’t believe it’s gone.”
“Your insurance should cover it.” Demetri said, looking up at her finally. “I’m sorry you lost all your stuff, though.”
“Me too.”
He reached over and patted her hand before pulling away fast. “Did I ever tell you about the time me and my team were in Tunisia?”
“No.” She smiled. “Peter never talks about his missions.”
“Well, we can’t give out specific details, but this one was a long time ago and it ended up about as messed up as you can get.” He went on to tell her about some Bedouin traders and a harem girl, and a particularly large supply of camel dung, and Diana laughed so hard her sides ached, finally feeling the tension inside her dissipating a bit. This was nice, just sitting and talking to Demetri, like they were old friends. “Talk about losing everything. Took months for me to get that smell outta my nose.”
“I bet.” She chuckled and finished off her last bite of chicken sandwich. “You want dessert? I got cookies from the gas station.”
As they made their way through a sleeve of chocolate chip cookies, they ended up having a long discussion about food—their favourites and the things they hated, best meals they’d ever had and the ones that made them look back and laugh at how bad they’d been. She talked about some of the changes she’d had to make to her diet since finding out she was pregnant. “Sushi is generally out right now, which is a shame because I love it so much.”
“That sucks.” Demetri stood and cleaned up their trash. “How about I promise to take you out for a huge sushi dinner once the baby is born? I know this great place that has the best wasabi ever.”
“Sounds amazing.” She got up and walked over to sit on the edge of the bed, cringing slightly at the stiffness still lingering in her neck. Diana reached up to knead the sore muscles, noticing Demetri watching her from across the room. He was always far too observant for his own good. “I’d like that, if you’re still around and not called off to save the world again.”
He snorted and walked back toward her, all lithe male grace in blue jeans. “You need a back rub?”
“Huh?” She frowned up at him. “Oh, no. I’m fine. Just stiff from riding in the car all day.”
“C’mon. Turn around.” He sat down beside her on the bed. “Let me help. I owe you after what happened earlier—slipping like that probably didn’t help your tense muscles, either. And I am still sorry about that. I’ll be sure to knock next time.” She gave him a look and he grinned. “Seriously. I’m good with my hands.”
“That’s what they all say,” she joked before giving in. It would be hard enough sleeping tonight in a new place without having a crick in her neck to deal with as well. “Fine. Massage away, magic fingers.”
His laugh was deep and rich and ran through her like warm honey. Then he started working her tense shoulders and she damned near orgasmed on the spot, it felt so good. Those long, strong hands of his rubbing and kneading and hitting all the right pressure points to make her knotted muscles melt into a puddle of goo.
Demetri probably should’ve thought this through a bit better, but it was too late now. He sat behind Diana on the king-sized bed, with the red velvet comforter that looked fit for a bordello, and moved her silky brown hair aside so he could get at her stiff shoulders a bit better. With his thumbs, he dug into the knots between her shoulder blades and damn. Those little sounds she made, sort of a mewling noise mixed with a throaty groan? Let’s just say that if he hadn’t been thinking X-rated thoughts about her before now, those sounds alone would’ve given him all sorts of porno fantasies. It took all the willpower he possessed not to lean forward and press his lips to the base of her neck, the spot he knew from past experience made her squirm and squeal and hold onto him so tight he thought she might never let him go.
But letting go was exactly what he should do. Because all this touching and closeness and connection could never lead anywhere good. It hadn’t for his parents. They’d been totally in love and totally connected—so much so that after his dad, a hero cop, had died in a shooting, his mom had only lasted a few months before she killed herself. Unable to go on without his father. Truth was, Demetri feared ever feeling that close to someone, even the mother of his kid. Because if he did open his heart, if he did allow himself to get that close to Diana or their baby and he lost them, it would end him.
So, no matter how tempting it might be to lose his head and take her to bed again, he wouldn’t. He was a SEAL, dammit. He could push away temptation and focus on the task at hand. He was trained to strategize and soldier on and save the world with the best of them. So why did it take just one look from the woman beside him to send all of his hard-won control right out the window?
“Yes, right there,” she moaned softly and a little more of his barriers crumbled. She was far more dangerous to him than any stalker could ever be. He took a deep breath and concentrated on the massage, because if he thought about how soft her skin was or how warm she felt he’d be lost for sure. “I didn’t realize how much stress I was holding onto until now.”
“It creeps up on you,” he said, his tone quiet as he worked. “You should try yoga maybe. I hear that’s good for pregnant women.”
“Maybe I will, once all this is over.” She scooted slightly to look back at him over her shoulder, putting their faces far closer than he’d expected. Close enough that her warm breath fanned his face and he could see the need and the wariness in
her pretty blue eyes. Close enough that if he leaned just a tiny bit closer, he could kiss her.
In the end, she took charge, closing the small distance between them and pressing her lips to his. It was short and sweet, so fast he would’ve missed it if he’d blinked. But afterward, his mouth tingled and his pulse pounded in his ears and Demetri found himself leaning forward to kiss her again, this time taking advantage of her small gasp to sweep his tongue into her mouth, tasting the sweet tang from her dinner and the familiar heat of her desire. Man, he’d missed this, missed her, way more than he’d allowed himself to believe.
Then, just as quickly as the kiss had started, it stopped. They both sat back, eyes wide and breath hard.
“I, um…” she started then stopped. “That was…”
“Yeah.” He dropped his hands to the bed, missing the heat of her already. “Sorry. I shouldn’t have done that. We shouldn’t have done that.”
“No.” She moved away to the other side of the bed, and faced him, her expression pensive. “You’re right. We should definitely not go there again. I mean, what with the way things are and all.”
“Right.” He pushed off the bed and went back to the dresser to rifle through his bag again. “I’m going to take a shower. Keep the door locked and don’t let anyone in.”
She didn’t respond, just leaned back against the headboard and clicked on the TV, staring blankly at it like she was a million miles away.
Demetri retreated to the bathroom, closing the door behind him, then leaning back against it, doing his best to keep it together and failing miserably. God. What the hell was wrong with him? This was Diana. His fondest memory and biggest mistake, all rolled into one. He’d vowed to keep his hands off of her, to find her someplace safe to stay until he could track down the threat against them, and then let her go. Yet here he was kissing her and yearning for her like some dumbass school kid. He didn’t want to need anyone, least of all Diana. She had too much power over him already. All it took was one look, one sigh, one touch and he lit up like a fucking candle inside. He needed to keep it together, keep it under wraps, keep his head in the game and his heart out of the equation if he wanted to get through this. He needed to start thinking of this as just another mission, just another job, in order to be successful.
Determined, he jammed on the shower, then stripped off his clothes before stepping under the spray. On edge and under pressure, he soaped up then rinsed off, letting the cold water work on his overheated body. If he’d been alone, he would’ve jerked off to rid himself of this unwanted sexual energy buzzing through him. But with her sitting just in the next room, he couldn’t, wouldn’t take the chance she might hear him. She had enough power over him already. If she knew how badly he wanted her, that could be catastrophic.
After regaining a modicum of control, he shut off the shower and got out, drying off before tugging on his own set of sweats and T-shirt, then quickly shaved and ran a comb through his damp hair before padding out of the bathroom barefoot. Diana was still sitting there watching TV with a blank look while he dug out an extra pillow and blanket from the closet before slumping down in his chair at the table again.
Eventually, she turned off the TV and seemed to be settling down to go to sleep. “The bed is huge,” she said, without looking at him. “You could easily sleep on one side and me on the other without us getting in each other’s way.”
“That’s not a good idea.” Restless, he got up and triple checked the locks on the door and peered out past the edge of the drapes to make sure there wasn’t anyone lurking about before he shut off the lights.
“No, I suppose it’s not,” she said at last. He lay down on the floor and punched his pillow harder than was necessary. Her quiet whisper made his heart clench. “Goodnight, Demetri.”
“Night,” he growled, tugging his blanket up to his chin, even though he felt hotter than hell. His body screamed for him to get up, get into bed with her, and pull her close, but he’d be damned if he did that. Stay safe. Stay alone. Stay on course and get through this unscathed. He kept repeating that over and over in hopes that maybe if he thought it enough times, his stupid heart would finally remember it.
Eight
Diana awoke the next morning to the delicious smells of bacon and melted cheese. Her stomach growled and she cracked open one eye to find Demetri sitting at the small round table again, already dressed, with a full array of breakfast foods laid out before him. He was watching her with an inscrutable expression.
“Good morning,” he said, his tone far too chipper for her liking.
The hunger roiling through her, however, quickly turned into a low-grade nausea that still plagued her each morning and she bolted for the bathroom, barely making it to the toilet before she upchucked. Ah, the not-so-glamourous life of an expectant mother.
After the heaving subsided, she washed her face and brushed her teeth, her temples pounding and her cheeks hot both from her mad dash to the bathroom and from embarrassment. Things were already awkward enough between her and Demetri. The last thing she needed was for him to think she was some sick weakling. She might be pregnant, but she could still be mighty when she had to be.
Once she’d rinsed her mouth, run her fingers through her hair, and used the toilet, she emerged from the bathroom and headed over to the table where he was still eyeing her, now with a hint of trepidation.
“Everything okay?” Demetri asked, pushing a paper cup in front of her. “I got you some hot tea.”
“Thanks,” she mumbled, popping off the lid to add sugar to the steaming liquid. “How’d you know I like tea?”
“I didn’t.” He shrugged and reached into the white bag beside him that she hadn’t seen earlier. He pulled out a handful of saltine cracker packets and handed them to her. “Looked it up on Google. Said tea and crackers are the best things for morning sickness. I wasn’t sure you had it until…” His voice trailed off and his gaze darted to the bathroom door then back again. “Anyway, I figured you should eat something for breakfast, either way, given how your stomach was rumbling yesterday.”
Huh. She opened one of the cracker packets with her teeth and nibbled on a saltine. They did help settle her stomach, but she was shocked he knew that. More than a little touched, too, that he’d taken the time to research the things she might be going through with her pregnancy. Usually she was the person who did things for others, the one others relied on, the sensible, dependable one. It was nice to have someone do that for her for a change. Her stupid ex would’ve never have been so considerate, but Demetri… Well, he was turning out to be a surprise in more ways than one.
While she finished one cracker packet and opened a second, Demetri devoured a breakfast sandwich. So that’s where the bacon and cheese smells had come from. Now that her stomach had settled somewhat, the other food was looking pretty good, but she didn’t want to chance another run for the toilet again thanks to a dose of grease.
As he chewed, Demetri glanced over at her. “I got another one for you, if you want it. Or there’s hash browns. Maybe you can try those. Whatever you want. Need to keep you fed to keep your strength up. We’ve got another long drive today.”
“Thanks. I’ll save it for later, if that’s all right.” She sipped more tea and sat back. “So, where’s our next stop?”
“Not sure yet. I told you about my friend John, right?”
She nodded. “John—the one who ended up in drag during that mission in Bahrain, right?”
Demetri laughed. “Yeah, that’s the one. He’s out of the service now, and has started up a security firm with some other vets. I called him up last night to let him know what’s going on, and that we’d need a place to stay tonight. The guys are supposed to text me with the details,” he said around a bite of food. “We can still go ahead and get on the road, though.”
“Right.” With a sigh, she stood and stretched. “Let me get ready and we can go.”
An hour later, she’d dressed in her new clothes, and done her
best to make herself presentable with the few toiletries she’d had time to grab during their rushed visit to the store yesterday, along with the cosmetics she kept in her purse. They packed up what little they had in the room, then headed back down to the SUV. Once they were on the road again, Diana fished her iPod out of her bag and used the special charger to hook it up to the vehicle’s sound system.
“You like audio books?” she asked, tapping through the device’s screen.
Demetri shrugged. “I guess. Not really much of a reader.”
“Hmm. How about TV shows? What kinds of things do you like to watch?”
“When I have time, which isn’t often, I like the crime shows,” he said, signalling before veering off on yet another exit. Apparently they’d be taking another circuitous route today. “Mysteries, stuff like that. I like figuring out whodunit. Like puzzles too.”
“Cool. How about we listen to the new book I started a few days ago?” Hard to take in now how much her life had changed in the last twenty-four hours. Her house was gone, her life as she’d known it would never be the same again. Her throat constricted a bit and she placed her hand on her stomach protectively before sitting back and swallowing hard and forcing a smile she didn’t quite feel. “It’s a romantic suspense story.”
“Romance?” He said the word with the same amount of disdain that most people reserved for something yucky stuck to the bottom of their shoe. “Really?”
Irritation chased away her sadness and she shifted slightly in her seat to face him, adjusting the seatbelt slightly so it didn’t cut across her neck. “Don’t tell me you’re one of those romance bashers. Listen, buddy. Romance is the biggest selling genre in fiction, netting over a billion dollars a year. The authors are some of the most talented on the planet. So don’t go knocking what you haven’t tried. Got it?”
