by Katie Knight
She put her arm around his waist and helped him to his feet, then led him inside. He did his best not to lean on her too much, but now that he was upright his head was spinning and his stomach was turning in somersaults as pain, fear and adrenaline mixed together in a nauseating cocktail. He made it to the bathroom before getting sick. Afterward, he sat on the bathroom floor and rested his head against the cool porcelain, trying to clear his thoughts enough to figure out what to do next.
The next thing he knew, Franklin came through the doorway. When had he called Harris? He didn’t remember, but then again, he might’ve passed out for a bit.
“Hey, buddy. Let’s get you to the hospital, huh?” Franklin got Demetri to his feet again and practically carried him one-armed out of the house and dumped him into the backseat of the rental car in the driveway. “I’m sorry, buddy. I don’t know how Rivers got through. I swear we’ll catch him, though. We’ll get him. Just stay with us, buddy.” The car door shut and Franklin’s words grew more muffled. “Diana, be sure to lock up and stay away from the windows until I get back.”
“I’m coming with you,” she said from somewhere nearby. “No way in hell I’m staying here by myself with that whack job out there gunning for me. And I won’t leave Demetri.”
“Diana, I don’t think that’s a good—” Franklin started.
“I don’t care what you think. I’m going to the hospital with him and that’s it.”
From where he lay in the backseat, Demetri couldn’t see either one of them, could only hear their words as he stared up at the roof of the car interior. Still, those words warmed his racing heart.
I won’t leave Demetri.
If only that were true. He closed his eyes again, a montage of images playing through his head. Seeing Diana emerge from the car at the ball. Dancing the night away with her in his arms. Making love to her that night. Seeing her again that day at her house and learning that she was pregnant, with his baby. Through the fog in his head, he heard car doors open and close, felt his head being lifted then rested atop the softest pillow ever. Beneath him, the engine roared to life, then they were moving.
My kid. Don’t want to lose my kid. Must protect our kid.
He forced his eyes open again and felt the cool palm of her hand against his forehead. Diana was there, in the backseat with him, his head resting in her lap as they bumped along in the car. Beside his ear, he felt the warmth of her belly, felt the press of the baby tucked up against his cheek.
The baby. My baby. Our baby.
God, the fact he’d could’ve lost this, could’ve lost her back there at the house, all because of one fiendishly calculated shot by Trent Rivers, only served to drive home one thing.
If he made it out of this night alive, he couldn’t risk putting her and the baby in any more danger because of him. John had been right earlier when he’d said it was Demetri that Rivers wanted to hurt. It was Demetri he was after, not Diana. If he had reason to think that Demetri was no longer part of Diana’s life, Diana would no longer have any value as a target. Therefore, Demetri needed to put as much distance between himself and the woman he loved as possible. It was the only way to keep her safe.
He opened his mouth to tell her, but the words refused to emerge past his dry throat. The only thing he managed to croak out was, “Thirsty.”
“We’ll get you something to drink at the hospital, buddy,” Franklin said from behind the wheel. “Almost there. Just hang on a little longer.”
“I’m sorry,” Diana said, sniffling. The sound of her tears nearly hurt him worse than his gunshot wound. “This is my fault, for going outside instead of staying indoors where it was safe. I never meant for you to get hurt because of me. Please don’t hate me, Demetri.”
Hate her? He could never hate her, no matter what she did. He loved her, even if he’d never, ever deserve her.
Demetri tried again to speak, but it was no use. The words wouldn’t come and even if they did, it was too late. Franklin screeched to a stop and the next thing Demetri knew, he was being pulled out of the car and onto a gurney where doctors and nurses raced him into a brightly lit emergency room and brought him down a hall to a trauma room. The staff worked around him, taking his vitals and asking him questions while the doctors examined his left shoulder. He tried to reach out to Diana where she stood at the end of the corridor with Franklin, but soon a curtain was pulled, and they disappeared from view.
Disappeared along with his silly hopes and dreams that all of this would work out in the end. No way did she deserve this kind of life, filled with danger and deceit and darkness. She deserved nothing but light and love and laughter. She deserved better than him. And once he got out of this place, he’d make sure she got it.
Regardless of how losing her would shred him to pieces.
Twenty-Three
“Why won’t they let me in to see him?” Diana asked the nurse at the desk for the umpteenth time.
“Are you family?” The nurse raised a brow at her. Diana wanted to scream that yes, she was. Or at least their baby was. But she didn’t. She just shook her head. “Only family are allowed back in the trauma rooms. I’m sorry.”
Diana dropped her face into her hands and forced herself to take a deep breath. No sense getting upset with the nurse. This wasn’t her fault. “Can you tell me if he’s okay?”
“Sorry, ma’am. We can’t disclose that information to unauthorized individuals.”
Ugh. Frustrated and restless, Diana pushed to her feet and paced the waiting area again. Moving gave her something to do besides worry, and it helped the swelling in her ankles too. Franklin was still texting with the guys in Atlanta and wasn’t much for small talk. She felt like she was going to explode if someone didn’t tell her something pretty soon.
“What is taking so long?” she said to no one in particular. “If it was just a flesh wound, like you said, clean through and through, it shouldn’t take this long to patch him up, right?”
No answer from Franklin, his thumbs still flying across his phone screen as he typed.
“I just want to make sure he’s all right with my own two eyes,” she continued. “That’s all. I need proof. There was a lot of blood. Too much blood. Oh, God. What if he’s dead? What if that bullet hit an artery or something and he bled out before they got him to surgery? What if—”
“Diana,” Franklin said at last, looking up from his phone to give her a flat look. “Please don’t upset yourself any more than you already are. It’s not good for the baby.”
As if in response, the kid tap-danced on her full bladder. Darn it. She huffed out a breath and headed for the restrooms across the hall. “Be right back.”
When she emerged a few minutes later, she found the emergency room doctor in the waiting room, talking to Franklin. Diana made a beeline for the guy, stopping about a foot away from the chair where he sat. “How’s Demetri? When can I see him?”
The doctor glanced over at her. “I’ll take you to him now. He’s sedated and needs to rest, so please don’t keep him long.”
She followed the doctor down the hall, the soles of her sneakers squeaking on the shiny linoleum floor and the scent of antiseptic stinging her nose. Franklin walked close on her heels as they rounded the corner and entered the recovery room where Demetri was resting after his surgery.
From where she stood, Demetri looked pale and drawn, smaller than his usual larger-than-life self in the hospital bed. The grey-blue of the hospital gown did nothing for his complexion, and the white bandages wrapping his left shoulder contrasted sharply with his tanned skin. Her fingertips itched to feel the steady beat of his heart beneath her hand, to prove he was alive and well and was going to be okay.
Instead, she rushed to his bedside and took his hand through the rails, holding his cold fingers in hers and wishing he’d say something, anything, to make this better.
“Diana, we can’t see each other anymore,” he said at last.
Yeah. That was not what she wanted to h
ear. Not by a mile.
“What?” She reached up to ruffle the dark hair that had fallen over his forehead. Must be the meds talking. “Why would you say that? Did you hit your head?” She’d been so focused on the shoulder wound, maybe she’d missed a head injury.
“Don’t.” He shied away from her touch, his gaze lowered and his expression remote. The niggle of uncertainty inside her sprouted tentacles and slithered through her, making her shiver even though it wasn’t cold. Then he met her eyes and that’s when she knew. Knew it wasn’t the medication or a head injury making him say such awful things. Knew he meant what he said. Knew that the description Franklin had given her earlier about his being so cold and calculating was completely, horrifyingly true. This was the real Demetri. Not the one she’d loved and held all night long in bed. Nope. That guy was gone, replaced by this robot. Demetri tugged his hand free and scowled down at her hand on the bedsheets like it was an abomination.
“What happened tonight was my fault,” he said in that same horrible, measured voice. “You could have been killed. My job is to protect you and I nearly failed tonight. It won’t happen again. I can’t let it happen again.”
She hated the desperation sizzling through her, hated the helpless sound of her voice, but she couldn’t stop herself from begging, “Please, Demetri. This is crazy. You had no way of knowing what Rivers was going to do. That house is the best protected place in Baltimore. I’m safer with you than anywhere else on the planet.”
“No.” He shook his head and stared at the wall next to him. “The only reason you’re in danger is because of me. If we can show Rivers that I’m not in your life anymore, then he’ll have no reason to ever come after you again. If we stay together, you’ll stay in the crosshairs. I refuse to put you or the baby at risk like that again. So this ends. Tonight.”
Her eyes stung and she blinked hard. She wouldn’t cry. No. Tears wouldn’t help anything and would only make her feel worse, make her feel weaker than she already did. She lifted her chin and forced herself to be brave. “What’s going to happen?”
“I’m going to die.”
“What?” Her knees did buckle then. Luckily, Franklin was there to shove a chair under her so she didn’t faceplant on the ground. She glanced at the monitors—heart, breathing were both normal. He was awake and coherent, and there weren’t any doctors around performing lifesaving measures. Sure, he wasn’t exactly looking at his best just now, but he didn’t look like he was dying. So what was he talking about? “I don’t understand.”
Demetri nodded to Franklin, who exited the room and shut the door behind him, leaving them in privacy. “I’ve discussed it with the guys and with the doctor, and we think it’s best if Rivers thinks his shot was fatal tonight. We’re going to fake my death.”
“Excuse me?” Hysteria bubbled up inside her before she swallowed it down. She needed to keep it together, if not for herself, then for the baby. She placed a protective hand over her stomach, reassured to feel the kid kick like always. “Say that again.”
“If Rivers thinks I’m dead, then it’s all over. He’s gotten his revenge. He’ll leave you alone and you can go back to your normal life.”
“Normal life?” She blinked at him, trying to take it all in. “I don’t have a life anymore, remember? My house is gone. I haven’t even checked in with the school for days, so my job is gone too, I’m sure. There’s nothing for me to go back to.”
“What about your mom?” Demetri said. “You could stay with her until you get back on your feet.”
“She’s got her own busy life. That last thing she needs is me and a baby underfoot.” She threw up her hands, hurt burning the back of her throat. He didn’t want her around, but he felt fine telling her what to do. She was done with that. Done with men tramping all over her heart and leaving her behind to pick up the wreckage. Time to stand up for herself and take back control, just like the heroines in all those romance novels she loved. Time to choose the best future for herself and her baby. Diana had no idea what that might be yet, but she’d figure it out. “I’ll deal with things. Don’t worry about it.”
Demetri sighed as if that was easier said than done. “If you’re not planning to go back, then you could stay here and take my house. Stay there. You liked the one bedroom, said it would make a great nursery. Go ahead then. Use it. I’ll sign it over to you.” He shook his head. “I don’t need it anyway. I haven’t lived there in years.”
This was it. The end. He planned to die to his old self and leave her behind in the dust. She could have his house but not him, never him.
Oh, God.
Bile burned in her throat and she pressed the back of her hand to her mouth to keep from throwing up. Why hadn’t she listened to her gut? Why had she gone and fallen in love with this man when she knew he’d never be happily ever after material? Why hadn’t she kept her heart and her feelings to herself and played it safe, like he’d wanted?
Demetri frowned down at his hands atop the covers. “It may not seem like it now, Diana, but this really is for the best. You won’t have to worry about Rivers stalking you anymore. I’ll go away, far away. You’ll never have to see me again. You can raise the baby, make a fresh start. You both will be better off without me. All I’ve ever done is bring trouble to your doorstep.”
She wanted to scream. Wanted to yell. Wanted to tell him he was wrong, so wrong. But a weird numbness had taken up residence inside her now, making her feel woozy and fuzzy, like none of this was real. Even though the hard nugget of anger wedged in her gut said it was all too real.
He was leaving. For good this time. Fine. She’d done fine on her own before he’d shown up and she’d damn well do fine again without him. She’d take his house—for now anyway, because she really did need a place to stay—and she’d sell it. Too many memories there. If she was going to start over someplace new, then maybe she’d go south or out to the West Coast where it was warm and sunny. She could have her baby there.
She loved Demetri Lewis, maybe she always would, but she was done fighting for a future he obviously didn’t want. The word cut her tongue, but she said it anyway. “Fine.”
His gaze met hers, sadness and resignation in his brown eyes. “You won’t ever be able to contact me again.”
“Understood.” She forced herself to her feet and headed for the door, needing to get out of there before she couldn’t anymore. “Goodbye, Demetri.”
“Goodbye, Diana,” he said, the words chasing her down the hall and outside into the cold, dark night.
Twenty-Four
Watching his own funeral was harder than Demetri had expected. Especially since his vantage point, hidden behind a small mausoleum, gave him a direct view of Diana standing between Franklin and his Aunt Rebecca.
On the plus side, there were a lot of people there—more than he’d expected, given how many years had passed since he’d lived there. People who’d known his parents, old classmates, even the guys from Bratton Security had shown up. His SEAL team was there as well, in full uniform. They’d been briefed on his true status but were putting on a good show of solemn deference to his fallen spirit.
On the minus side was watching Diana weep. If she was faking it, the woman deserved an Oscar. Beneath her dark veil, tears streamed down her cheeks and her slender shoulders shook with her sobs. Franklin did his best to comfort her, even putting his arm around her once. Demetri didn’t like that. His gut clenched and he fisted his hands at his sides to keep from rushing out and punching Harris. Then he reminded himself that he’d chosen this, that his death had been his own idea and he had no business interfering in however Diana chose to get on with her life.
Their part together was over. Done. Period. Amen.
The knowing didn’t make the raw wounds on his heart any easier to bear.
A shadow flitted past on the opposite side of the gathering, maybe ten or so feet behind the mourners, and Demetri instantly snapped to attention, his SEAL instincts going on high alert.
&
nbsp; Trent Rivers. Had to be. He’d figured the guy would show up just to be sure he was really dead.
They’d had a closed casket, but otherwise, it was all realistic, right down to the priest reading the scriptures before the body was lowered into the ground. Demetri saw Rivers disappear behind a copse of trees and slowly made his way in that direction. He’s sworn to protect Diana and he would, this one final time, before letting her go forever.
He'd take down Rivers once and for all, no matter the cost.
For Diana. For their baby. For what they could have had and for what she would rebuild for herself in the future.
Without him.
It was weird. Diana knew that, but it still felt like she could feel Demetri there, watching her.
Honestly, for all she knew, he was there, hiding in the shadows, still carrying out his damned mission. It was always the mission with him. Except for when it wasn’t…like on those nights he’d spent tangled together with her. If he would’ve remembered the mission instead of bringing her back into his bed over and over again—or, for that matter, taking her to bed in the first place—she might not be where she was now. Alone and heartbroken.
The anger and hurt inside her caused more tears to well. At least at a funeral, even a fake one, no one thought anything of it. No one but her. She wasn’t a whiner or a crier. She was a “get over it and get on with it” kind of gal, and the fact she’d fallen so hard and so fast for the last man on earth she should have just made her madder at herself.
It was funny really. She’d spent her childhood thinking she never wanted to end up like her mother—single and raising kids on her own. And yet, here she was, planning to do just that.
Fine. Whatever. She blew her nose and swiped the back of her hand across her damp cheeks, putting on a good show for the others clustered around the casket. She’d be a single mom and she’d be a damned good one too. After all, she’d learned from the best. They might not have had much growing up, but she and Peter had known they were loved and that was the greatest gift of all.
