Cassandra noted his amused expression and tsk-tsked him. “You know how important meditation is, Sam. Sarah asked me to find her a class, and I thought of you. I never saw anyone teach neophytes at work like that until you came along. The other lifeguard supervisors scream at the recruits and blow their whistles. Run, swim, practice mouth-to-mouth resuscitation.”
“Mouth-to-mouth resuscitation is quite important,” he teased.
“Staying calm and responding appropriately to stressful situations is more important.” She nodded at him.
He agreed with her, but that wasn’t the point. “How old is your houseguest?” he asked.
Cassandra didn’t bat an eye. “Sarah is in her thirties, like you, and she’s quite pretty. She returns to California after Labor Day.”
So here was this summer’s anonymous yet intimate fling—was that what she was implying?
“No, Cassandra. Sorry.” Honestly, the morning’s uncomfortable realizations about him and Lucy not having an emotional connection were making him not want to have his yearly fling. It seemed pathetic now. Maybe he’d only thought he’d been connecting with these women, just as he’d thought he’d been connecting with Lucy during their twice-monthly Saturday outings. Lucy had made him see that it hadn’t been true, at all.
“Please, Dad, help her!” Lucy’s voice was a shriek. He nearly jumped, it surprised him so much.
“Luce, I’m going to be busy with you. You and I can hang out and do stuff together. We can go to the library and read books together all day, if that’s what you want.” He would miss his job, and money would be tight, but at least the time spent together would bring them closer.
“But, Dad, you don’t understand...” Lucy got up and shrugged out of her backpack. She riffled through a stack of books and papers and pulled out a magazine.
Business Roundup. He stared at her, confused. This was an adult publication, and not something he or her mother read, that was for sure. He couldn’t quite picture bohemian Cassandra reading it, either.
Lucy flipped the pages open to an article she’d marked with a yellow sticky note and showed the pages to him. One featured a huge, glossy picture of a severe, unsmiling woman.
He blinked and looked up at his daughter.
“This is Sarah Buckley,” Lucy said. “Haven’t you heard of her?”
Should he have? He shrugged and held up his hands.
“She’s one of the most important women in Silicon Valley,” his eleven-year-old informed him.
He studied the picture again. Sarah Buckley wore a black suit jacket with a white shirt and had dark chin-length hair. Her fighting gaze made her look like she battled and scrapped for what was hers and never gave up trying.
“I didn’t know you were interested in business,” he said to Lucy.
“She’s a woman of substance. That’s what it says. Read the article.”
He took the magazine from her and flipped through the piece. It was five pages long. When he heard his daughter loved the library, frankly, he’d thought she meant the young adult section. Cassandra had all kinds of artsy friends who wrote literature for kids and teens, but seriously...business magazines?
“Sarah Buckley talks about setting life goals and making daily progress and moving above the limitations of your background.” Lucy set her chin as she spoke, and in that moment, there was no question, she absolutely reminded Sam of the driven woman profiled in the piece.
He moved away from the magazine with the photograph of the intense Silicon Valley executive that Lucy so admired. He strode over to a couch across the room and sank deeply into the cushions. The whole day so far had been staggering to him. What other parts of herself had Lucy kept hidden from him? He had such a gap to bridge with her that it felt overwhelming.
Lucy settled back in the chair, rereading the article about the woman she obviously idolized. Cassandra wore a thoughtful expression that Sam couldn’t place.
“She’s my niece,” Cassandra said quietly. “My deceased sister’s only daughter. She’s in trouble with her job and she’s coming here to destress for the summer.”
“Sarah Buckley is your niece?” He stood up and glanced over Lucy’s shoulder at the photograph again. He saw no family resemblance to Cassandra.
A movement out the window caught his attention. On the beach, a crew on a town dump truck was delivering freshly painted lifeguard stands to each of the assigned stations.
A pang went through him. As much as he wanted to improve his relationship with Lucy this summer, the reminders of what he was giving up for that made Sam think again of all the good things he loved about his job that he would miss once he tendered his resignation. He would miss the early morning swims with the lifeguard teams, being calmed by and at peace in the vast, powerful ocean, his refuge since he’d been able to walk. Being one with the ocean was a feeling he couldn’t easily describe, a home to him. It was his peace and his anchor. He’d hoped Lucy would feel this way too, but she didn’t.
Not everybody loved the ocean, he reminded himself. Lots of people couldn’t swim or didn’t know how to manage the powerful rip currents that could drown even strong swimmers in seconds if they didn’t know how to read and navigate the tide’s unique signals. Sam loved the rescue teams, the camaraderie of the other lifeguards, his older bosses and the younger men and women, still in college, that he trained and mentored. He loved helping lost kids find their families and he loved diffusing tensions between beachgoers who’d sat too long in hot summer traffic.
He was good at it. He would do it year-round if the wages were good enough and he lived in a region of the country that supported it. Because of Lucy, he had stayed in Wallis Point, a town close to her home. It had now become his permanent home, too.
“Dad, you shouldn’t quit your lifeguard job,” Lucy pleaded again. “Please let me stay with Cassandra.”
She must have been watching him stare wistfully at the beach. The magazine was slack in her lap, and her serious brown eyes seemed sorry for him.
“She’ll be in good hands here,” Cassandra added softly.
“What about your work?” he asked Cassandra.
She resumed washing her brushes. “Don’t worry about me. I always take care of myself.” She glanced up at Sam with an expression he couldn’t quite read. “I’ve never told anyone this, but I do have regrets from Sarah’s childhood.”
Both he and Lucy had given her their full attention. They waited for her next words with rapt curiosity.
“Her parents both died when Sarah was twelve.” Cassandra paused to scrub at an especially tough stain on one of her brushes.
“I know this story.” Lucy jumped in eagerly. “Sarah talks about it in the article. She said that facing tragedy and then a difficult home life in her younger years helped hone her focus and showed her the importance of hard work in creating her own destiny.” She read from the magazine. “‘Because only in creating one’s own destiny can one ever be free.’” She put the magazine down. “She won a full scholarship to study engineering at university, where she started developing her own patents and inventions. She started her own company, and now I think she’s really rich. Nobody can push her around anymore.”
Sam stared at his daughter, confused on all kinds of levels. Money was what was important to Lucy? He hadn’t had an inkling that she placed so high a value on wealth. He certainly hadn’t passed that onto her. Business and power had never been important drivers to him. He was more of a helper, and he liked to live simply. Humbly. Sarah Buckley’s world just wasn’t his kind of place.
Cassandra shuffled over, bringing the platter of blueberry cake with her. She plunked it down before him. “Some refreshment, Sam?” she asked drily.
“That is just like what Hannah the witch gave to Nathaniel, too!” Lucy exclaimed. “Dad, you can be Nat!”
Cassandra raised an eyebrow at him.
“Let me guess,” he said, realizing he would have to get used to living with Lucy on her terms and not just spending two afternoons per month on a fun, distracting outing he’d dreamed up. “I’m living in The Witch of Blackbird Pond?”
“Nathaniel was Kit’s love interest. They both needed blueberry cake and kittens to find their happily ever after,” Cassandra explained.
“They get married in the end,” Lucy piped up. “Neither of them see it coming. But it’s true love and a happy ending.”
“Mm-hmm. Right.”
“Cynical about love, are you?” Cassandra asked him with a smile.
He laughed. “I’m not cynical about anything.” Actually, he was amazed that Lucy was talking so much, and about things she never talked about with him. With Sam she was always so serious and polite. This afternoon’s conversation was a revelation, even if much of it was disturbing to him. A reminder of how much he’d let himself off the hook as a parent.
He shook his head. It was bewildering, sometimes, that he was even a father to a daughter.
With a sigh, Cassandra sat beside him on the couch, patting his knee with her hand as she did so.
“Lucy will be safe and happy here, Sam. Let me watch her during the days for you—this is what she wants. And my cottage is close by—you can glance back at it any time of day from the beach, and here she’ll be. Except when we’re at the library, of course. And, yes, I do have an ulterior motive in wanting to keep Lucy around for the summer. It plays to my own guilt.”
“I don’t understand.”
“As I was saying before, I wasn’t there for Sarah when she needed me,” she said in a low voice. “After her parents were killed in an automobile accident.”
“So, where were you?”
Cassandra glanced at Lucy, who now had two cats on her lap. The second was a huge guy who looked part Maine Coon, with big bushy ears and a thick black coat. He blinked his green eyes slowly and purred while Lucy petted him.
“That’s Simmonds,” Cassandra said. “The smaller male in the tuxedo fur is Becker.” She turned back to Sam. “Let’s you and I step outside for a minute. Lucy will be fine with my two boys to keep her company.”
He nodded and rose with Cassandra. Lucy barely noticed, so busy was she talking to Becker, who actually seemed to be “talking” back.
“Becker rules the roost,” Cassandra said, as she crossed her small porch and sat in a blue metal seat. Sam sat across from her on an Adirondack chair. “He’ll be out here squawking in an instant if anything happens with Lucy. Have I ever told you the story about Becker waking me up when the kitchen was filled with smoke? A wire shorted and I didn’t hear the smoke alarm, I’m such a heavy sleeper.”
Sam smiled politely. He wasn’t a cat person himself.
“Ah, well.” Cassandra settled back and closed her eyes. The breeze stirred her gray hair and she sighed. “About Sarah. She was left alone after her parents died, and I wasn’t aware that she didn’t have anybody else except me to rely on until months later. I was in Naples, you see.” Her mouth twisted. “And back then...” She lifted her hands and shrugged. “The authorities in the States didn’t know where I was. They tried after the funeral, but couldn’t locate me in time.”
“What happened to Sarah?”
“She was put into a foster home. Maybe two.”
Oh. Hell.
That made Lucy’s situation look like a walk in a park. “Are you okay with your relationship now?” he asked.
Cassandra leaned forward on her cane and stretched out her legs in front of her. The legs of her batiked pants billowed like flags in the breeze.
“It’s certainly affected her and how she feels toward me, I can’t deny that. I’m not sure she ever forgave me for my initial choice to skip the funeral. The truth was, I couldn’t bear to face it. And by the time I realized what had happened to her and flew back to the States to fetch her, she’d managed to win herself a scholarship to an exclusive boarding school in California and was building her own life for herself. I didn’t stop trying to make it up to her, but...” Cassandra paused. “I had my own problems at the time,” she admitted. “There...was a reason I was in Naples to begin with.”
“And what was that?”
She waved her hand. “It’s not important now. The important thing is that Sarah reached out to me and she’s coming here to relax on her sabbatical.” She gazed out to sea. “I’m hoping the slower pace can help her.”
A summer by the sea could do a lot to help heal people. He’d seen it himself.
“When is the last time you saw your niece?”
“In person?” Cassandra turned her face to the sun. “It must be since she graduated from college.”
“That long?”
“She’s usually quite busy with her job, Sam.” Cassandra crossed her legs. “My thought is that Sarah and Lucy can each be good influences for one another. I confess—I was the one who told Lucy about Sarah. A young girl needs female role models. And for Sarah, getting out of her own head and teaching Lucy what she’s learned would distract her from the stress of work she’s dealing with.”
“I thought your goal this summer was to improve your relationship with Sarah.”
“It is. If she and Lucy click, it could help us all quite a bit. I want to create a good environment for both of them.”
He still felt skeptical. Was this really the best thing for Lucy?
“I had my choices to make, Sam,” Cassandra said softly. “I did the best I knew how.” She placed her hand on her cane and leaned closer to him. “So, will you help me? Will you bring my niece into a class or two with your lifeguards? Encourage her to take Lucy to the library now and then? They could talk about their common interests. Topics that you and I don’t have the passion for or knowledge of but that they seem to share.”
When Cassandra put it like that, it didn’t seem so harmful. A relaxed childcare and niece-helping arrangement that just might make sense for everyone.
Most important, it was what Lucy wanted.
“Well, okay. Sure. As for the meditation lessons, we’ll play it by ear once your niece gets here—that’s the best that I can do.”
Cassandra nodded, obviously relieved. “Sarah is coming at the end of next week. Sam, I can start watching Lucy for you immediately if you’d like. I would enjoy taking her to the library as she pleases. I don’t have any contracted commitments for the next month at least, so this would fill my time and give me great pleasure.”
Having Cassandra provide childcare for Lucy while he worked would help Sam with his finances. And he did love his job.
Plus, he would still see Lucy in the mornings and evenings, at lunch time and around his shifts...
“Fine. I’m off work already this week, and I don’t start lifeguarding until Monday morning. I’ll walk Lucy over to your cottage then. You can bring your niece over to my lifeguard station when she arrives, and I’ll talk to her about the classes.”
Cassandra gave him a relieved smile. “That sounds lovely.”
The wind was kicking up again; they should go back inside soon. “So...we’re set with our plan for summer? Lucy rejoins her mother on Labor Day weekend. Or is there a problem with your schedule for the month of August?”
Cassandra hesitated. “No, not a problem, but...”
He waited.
“My gentleman friend in Naples...we’ve kept in touch all these years, and there is a possibility he might visit for a week in August. We haven’t decided on that yet. It depends how well things are going with Sarah and me.”
“Is this gentleman friend the same reason you were in Naples when Sarah’s parents died?”
“It was.” A sad expression crossed Cassandra’s face. “But before he commits to visiting, I’m waiting to see how Sarah feels about it.” Cassandra looked quickly at Sam as if to reassure him. �
��If he does come, I’ll have him stay at the Grand Beachfront Hotel while he’s here. My cottage is so small.”
Sam couldn’t help asking, “Was it a love affair that kept you from Sarah?”
“It was.” Cassandra turned her face to the wind, and he’d never seen a woman so grief stricken. “I told you I had regrets, Sam.” She swallowed.
“Yes,” he said, thinking of his regrets with Lucy. He and Cassandra both had relationships to mend.
They sat companionably, side by side. With her faraway look, Cassandra seemed to be revisiting memories. He turned his own face to the sun. It warmed him even though the wind was brisk, and the rolling ridge in the beach blocked the worst of the gusts. It struck him that maybe this summer could work out well, after all, and be beneficial to all of them.
“We’ll keep Claudio’s visit between us,” Cassandra suddenly said. “For now. Until Sarah arrives.”
“Sure,” he agreed. He didn’t see how Cassandra’s secret could possibly affect him and Lucy.
“Well,” Cassandra sat up and patted his knee, then reached for her cane. “Come. Let’s go see what your very bright and imaginative daughter is up to now.”
Yes. He was curious about that himself.
He stood, opened Cassandra’s cottage door for her and held it while she made her way back inside.
“Be patient with my niece when you meet her,” were Cassandra’s final words on the subject that morning. “She’s had a hard life.”
Sam just nodded.
A week later, he regretted everything he’d agreed to with Cassandra for his and Lucy’s summer.
Copyright © 2018 by Cathryn Parry
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Falling for the Brother Page 27
