by Gary Paulsen
Amos scowled. “I’ll miss getting my picture taken with the Canadian bobsled team. And if we’re not careful we’ll miss the start of the final figure-skating competition.”
“Got it covered. I already called the Canadians. They’re great. We’ll get the picture later, and they’ve arranged for us to have a box seat at the skating competition. Don’t worry about a thing, Amos. I’ve got it all under control.”
“That’s exactly what I’m worried about.”
•12
“It’s cold out here. When is she coming?”
“Stop complaining, Amos. It’s probably not the easiest thing in the world to stuff a girl Kim’s size in a duffel bag and then smuggle her out of a hotel past ten security guards.”
A horn honked beside them. Amos jumped and came down on Dunc’s foot. A burly taxi driver with a smelly cigar rolled down the passenger-side window and stuck his head out. “Hey. You kids need a lift, or what? I ain’t got all day.”
Dunc pushed Amos off his foot. “Like we said. We’re waiting on our luggage. It should be here any minute.”
“It better be or I’m turning on my meter.”
“Kim’s not coming.” Amos rubbed his arms for warmth. “She’s probably up in her room right now laughing herself silly over how stupid we are to fall for something this dumb.”
“She’s coming. Unless I miss my guess, I’d say she’s having a little trouble with her—there they are now.”
A heavyset Korean man walked furtively out the front doors of the complex carrying a large brown duffel bag. Dunc waited on the curb until the driver helped the man put it in the trunk. The large man didn’t say a word. He stared coolly at Dunc, handed him a piece of paper, and went back inside.
Dunc opened the door of the taxi and slid in beside Amos. Quickly he unfolded the paper. An address on the other side of town was written on it.
The driver looked over his shoulder. “Okay, kid. Where to?”
Dunc crumpled up the paper. “I need you to drive down the street one block and take four lefts.”
The driver started the motor and stepped on the gas. Then he took his foot off the gas and scratched his head. “Wait a minute. Four left turns brings us right back here.”
Dunc smiled. “Right. That’s where we want to go.”
•13
Amos groaned with the weight. “I guess someday you’re going to explain why I’m helping you sneak this heavy duffel bag up three nights of stairs to our room instead of taking it downtown like we were supposed to.” He changed positions and tried to get a better grip on his end.
Dunc nodded and kept climbing.
“And I guess you’re also going to tell me why you’ve been holding out on me about what’s really going on around here.”
Dunc nodded again and fumbled for the key in his pocket. He put it in his mouth, pushed the bar on the door at the third-floor landing, and helped heave the bag down the hall to their room.
They struggled through the door and dropped the large bag on Amos’s bed. Dunc hurried to unzip it. “Quick, Amos. Get me some water. She’s passed out.”
Dunc gently helped peel Kim out of the bag and propped her up on a couple of pillows. When Amos came back with the water, Dunc stuck his fingers in it and flicked some droplets onto her forehead and cheeks.
Nothing happened.
“That’s not how you do it.” Amos took the glass. “Don’t you ever watch television?” He stepped around Dunc and splashed what was left of the water in Kim’s face.
She sputtered. Then her eyes snapped open. Like a tigress she flew at Amos, landing a hard karate kick in his midsection. Amos crumpled to the floor, holding his stomach. Kim whirled to face Dunc and prepared to give him more of the same.
“Hang on!” Dunc took a step back and put up his hands. “We’re your friends. We just want to help you.”
Kim kept her guard up. She studied Dunc. “Who are you? Why have you brought me here?”
“I’m Duncan Culpepper. And that”—he pointed at the floor—“is my friend Amos.”
Amos gave her a weak wave. “Hi. Remember me?”
Kim was confused. “I remember. The very bad skater.” She slowly sat up on the bed and held her head. “I not understand.”
“That makes two of us.” Amos crawled to a chair.
“We don’t have a lot of time, so I’ll try and explain it as fast as I can.” Dunc pulled up a chair. “Yesterday a girl from your country gave us a note. It said she needed our help. Then later that night, the same girl met me in room 502. In perfect English she tried to convince me that she wanted to defect. And the strangest part was, she looks exactly like you.”
Kim sat up angrily. “Ikchong!”
“Who’s Ikchong?” Amos asked.
“I have a hunch she’s Kim’s twin sister.” Dunc looked at the girl beside him. “Am I right?”
Kim nodded. “Ikchong is sister. Her servant, Ko Ki-su, fix me special tea to help relax before competition. Next thing, I am here.”
“That explains how she got you in the bag. They must have put some kind of knockout drug in your tea.”
“But why …”
“Does your sister skate?”
“Oh yes. Very good too. She try for spot on championship team but score too low.”
“There’s your answer.” Dunc stood up and moved to the telephone. “Ikchong is jealous. She never wanted to defect. She only made us think that, so we would help her. Then she arranged to have Kim put in the trunk of the taxi so she could take her place in the competition today.”
“Who are you calling?” Amos asked.
Dunc paused. “The competition starts in thirty minutes. We’re going to need help to get Kim on that ice without a bunch of reporters and officials finding out what’s going on.”
•14
Kim stepped nimbly into the brown bag. This time she was dressed in a short white skating costume. Dunc pulled it up around her and zipped it shut. “You okay in there?”
A muffled okay came from inside the bag.
“Get your end, Amos. We don’t have much time left.”
“Are you sure this is the only way? I don’t think I should be lifting heavy things. She could have busted one of my ribs.”
“Your ribs are fine. Come on.”
“Oh, all right. I wouldn’t get any sympathy around here if I was dying. At least we’re going downstairs this time.”
Because of the competition, the hotel was practically empty when they reached the bottom floor. One of the guards near the elevator gave them a strange look as they crossed the lobby, but he was busy talking on the phone and didn’t stop them.
When they reached the rink Dunc stopped and took a breath. “I hope the cavalry’s waiting on us.” He pushed the door open and headed downstairs.
“And just where do you think you two are going?” The guard at the desk stood up and folded his muscular arms.
Dunc swallowed. “We’re meeting some people here to deliver this bag. They picked up ours by mistake, so we came to switch.”
The guard’s eyes narrowed. He stepped around the desk and reached to unzip the duffel bag. “We’ll see about that.”
“Hold on there.” The entire Canadian hockey team swarmed around the guard. “Thanks for bringing our stuff, Dunc.” They dropped a large green bag on the floor at Dunc’s feet, picked up the brown one, and whisked it down the hall.
“Say. What’s going on here?” The guard saw the green bag start to wiggle. He looked at Amos. “You. Open that bag.”
Amos rubbed his chin. “I could do that. But it would probably be a big mistake.”
“Why?”
“Because Ikchong’s in there.”
“You have a person in that bag?”
“I didn’t say Ikchong was a person.”
The guard stepped back. “If it’s not a person …” The bag started squirming furiously.
Dunc pointed at Amos. “My friend here won’t go anywhere without her, Of
ficer. Ikchong is his pet cobra.”
•15
Dunc rang Amos’s doorbell and tried to wait patiently for someone to answer. Mrs. Binder opened the front door still wearing her robe and curlers, carrying a cup of coffee.
Dunc rushed past her. “You look great this morning as usual, Mrs. B.” He took the stairs three at a time, reached to pat Scruff, and turned Amos’s doorknob.
Amos was standing on the top step of a tall metal ladder in the middle of his bedroom. He had pulled the mattress off his bed and placed it a few feet from the ladder. “Hi, Dunc. Come on in. You can watch me work on my half Salchow.”
“Your what?”
“Half Salchow. It’s the half after the skater already jumps in the air. This is the landing part. Watch.”
Amos made a dramatic leap off the ladder, twisted in the air, threw out one hand, and nipped. It was beautiful. Except for the part where he caught his fingers in the light fixture, hung there for a moment, ripped most of the hide off his fingertips, and then dropped seat-first into the wastebasket.
“That’s interesting, Amos. Did it take you long to perfect it?”
“Shut up and get me out of this thing. It’s all your fault I’m doing this stuff, anyway.”
“My fault?”
“You promised I’d get my picture taken with all those athletes to impress Melissa. Did I? No. I not only didn’t get even one lousy picture, I got thrown out of the sports complex for having a dangerous pet. By the time we got Ikchong on that bus to Cleveland, I didn’t even make it back in time to watch the final competition.”
“I know, Amos. But we kept Ikchong from skating. Kim wound up with a bronze medal.”
“And I wound up with sore ribs and no autographs. The only way I can awe Melissa now is to show her my smooth moves.”
“That’s why I’m here, Amos. It came in this morning’s mail. Kim sent you a present.”
“What is it, bandages?”
Dunc pulled something out of the manila envelope he was carrying. “Look. It’s a picture of her getting the bronze medal. She signed it at the bottom.”
“Let me see that.” Amos grabbed the picture. “All right!” He headed out the door.
Dunc yelled after him, “Where are you going?”
Amos was already halfway down the stairs. “Maybe it’s not too late to impress Melissa after all.”
Dunc went to the door. He thought about telling Amos that he would make a better impression on Melissa if he took the wastebasket off his rear end. On the other hand … why spoil a perfect record?
Be sure to join Dunc and Amos in these other Culpepper Adventures:
The Case of the Dirty Bird
When Dunc Culpepper and his best friend, Amos Binder, first see the parrot in a pet store, they’re not impressed—it’s smelly, scruffy, and missing half its feathers. They’re only slightly impressed when they learn that the parrot speaks four languages, has outlived ten of its owners, and is probably 150 years old. But when the bird starts mouthing off about buried treasure, Dunc and Amos get pretty excited. Let the amateur sleuthing begin!
Dunc’s Doll
Dunc and his accident-prone friend Amos are up to their old sleuthing habits once again. This time they’re after a band of doll thieves! When a doll that once belonged to Charles Dickens’s daughter is stolen from an exhibition at the local mall, the two boys put on their detective gear and do some serious snooping. Will a vicious watchdog keep them from retrieving the valuable missing doll?
Culpepper’s Cannon
Dunc and Amos are researching the Civil War cannon that stands in the town square when they find a note inside telling them about a time portal. Entering it through the dressing room of La Petite, a women’s clothing store, the boys find themselves in downtown Chatham on March 8, 1862—the day before the historic clash between the Monitor and the Merrimac. But the Confederate soldiers they meet mistake them for Yankee spies. Will they make it back to the future in one piece?
Dunc Gets Tweaked
Dunc and Amos meet up with a new buddy named Lash when they enter the radical world of skateboard competition. When somebody “cops”—steals—Lash’s prototype skateboard, the boys are determined to get it back. After all, Lash is about to shoot for a totally rad world’s record! Along the way they learn a major lesson: Never kiss a monkey!
Dunc’s Halloween
Dunc and Amos are planning the best route to get the most candy on Halloween. But their plans change when Amos is slightly bitten by a werewolf. He begins scratching himself and chasing UPS trucks—he’s become a were-puppy!
Dunc Breaks the Record
Dunc and Amos have a small problem when they try hang gliding—they crash in the wilderness. Luckily, Amos has read a book about a boy who survived in the wilderness for fifty-four days. Too bad Amos doesn’t have a hatchet. Things go from bad to worse when a wild man holds the boys captive. Can anything save them now?
Dunc and the Flaming Ghost
Dunc’s not afraid of ghosts, although Amos is sure that the old Rambridge house is haunted by the ghost of Blackbeard the Pirate. Then the best friends meet Eddie, a meek man who claims to be impersonating Blackbeard’s ghost so that he can live in the house in peace. But if that’s true, why are flames shooting from his mouth?
Amos Gets Famous
Deciphering a code they find in a library book, Amos and Dunc stumble onto a burglary ring. The burglars’ next target is the home of Melissa, the girl of Amos’s dreams (who doesn’t even know he’s alive). Amos longs to be a hero to Melissa, so nothing will stop him from solving this case—not even a mind-boggling collision with a jock, a chimpanzee, and a toilet.
Dunc and Amos Hit the Big Top
To impress Melissa, Amos decides to perform on the trapeze at the visiting circus. Look out below! But before Dunc can talk him out of his plan, the two stumble across a mystery behind the scenes at the circus. Now Amos is in double trouble. What’s really going on under the big top?
Dunc’s Dump
Camouflaged as piles of rotting trash, Dunc and Amos are sneaking around the town dump. Dunc wants to find out who is polluting the garbage at the dump with hazardous and toxic waste. Amos just wants to impress Melissa. Can either of them succeed?
Dunc and the Scam Artists
Dunc and Amos are at it again. Some older residents of their town have been bilked by con artists, and the two boys want to look into these crimes. They meet elderly Betsy Dell, whose nasty nephew Frank gives the boys the creeps. Then they notice some soft dirt in Ms. Dell’s shed, and a shovel. Does Frank have something horrible in store for Dunc and Amos?
Dunc and Amos and the Red Tattoos
Dunc and Amos head for camp and face two weeks of fresh air—along with regulations, demerits, KP, and inedible food. But where these two best friends go, trouble follows. They overhear a threat against the camp director and discover that camp funds have been stolen. Do these crimes have anything to do with the tattoo of the exotic red flower that some of the camp staff have on their arms?
Dunc’s Undercover Christmas
It’s Christmastime, and Dunc, Amos, and Amos’s cousin T.J. hit the mall for some serious shopping. But when the seasonal magic is threatened by disappearing presents, and Santa Claus himself is a prime suspect, the boys put their celebration on hold and go undercover in perfect Christmas disguises! Can the sleuthing trio protect Santa’s threatened reputation and catch the impostor before he strikes again?
The Wild Culpepper Cruise
When Amos wins a “Why I Love My Dog” contest, he and Dunc are off on the Caribbean cruise of their dreams! But there’s something downright fishy about Amos’s suitcase, and before they know it, the two best friends wind up with more high-seas adventure than they bargained for. Can Dunc and Amos figure out who’s out to get them and salvage what’s left of their vacation?
Dunc and the Haunted Castle
When Dunc and Amos are invited to spend a week in Scotland, Dunc can already hear
the bagpipes a-blowin’. But when the boys spend their first night in an ancient castle, it isn’t bagpipes they hear. It’s moans! Dunc hears groaning coming from inside his bedroom walls. Amos notices that the eyes of a painting follow him across the room! Could the castle really be haunted? Local legend has it that the castle’s former lord wanders the ramparts at night in search of his head! Team up with Dunc and Amos as they go ghostbusting in the Scottish Highlands!
Cowpokes and Desperadoes
Git along, little dogies! Dunc and Amos are bound for Uncle Woody Culpepper’s Santa Fe cattle ranch for a week of fun. But when they overhear a couple of cowpokes plotting to do Uncle Woody in, the two sleuths are back on the trail of some serious action! Who’s been making off with all the prize cattle? Can Dunc and Amos stop the rustlers in time to save the ranch?
Prince Amos
When their fifth-grade class spends a weekend interning at the state capitol, Dunc and Amos find themselves face-to-face with Amos’s walking double—Prince Gustav, Crown Prince of Moldavia! His Royal Highness is desperate to uncover a traitor in his ranks. And when he asks Amos to switch places with him, Dunc holds his breath to see what will happen next. Can Amos pull off the impersonation of a lifetime?
Coach Amos
Amos and Dunc have their hands full when their school principal asks them to coach a local T-ball team. For one thing, nobody on the team even knows first base from left field, and the season opener is coming right up. And then there’s that sinister-looking gangster driving by in his long black limo and making threats. Can Dunc and Amos fend off screaming tots, nervous mothers, and the mob, and be there when the ump yells “Play ball”?
