I forgot how angry I was at him. Now that he reminds me, I resent how long it took him to apologize. I resent that he only comes now that Calipher is gone, and he knows there is no one for him to compete with. The resentment hardens in me like coals. But I need him right now. So I just nod.
“Do you know what happened? Why did he leave?”
He pulls his brows together over his blank eyes. “I only know rumors.”
“Please. Tell me.” The only thing worse than the void Calipher’s departure has left in me is how impossible it is to understand.
“It seems Calipher is not the only angel who has…strayed…with humans under their charge.” He glances to me. “The rumor is that Theia called them back because she is losing control of them.”
All the angels, just gone? I can’t get my mind around it.
“Losing control? But—”
“There is more.”
He waits for me to look to him.
“People are losing faith in the First Creatures in general, and the gods too. Some are even saying the gods are fighting amongst themselves. That, for the first time, they cannot agree on what to do.”
“Is it true? What does Shael say?”
“I cannot hear Him.” Bastus fidgets his arms. “Do not share that with anyone. I do not wish to fan the flames.”
Calipher is gone, I tell myself. I will myself to believe it, but it will not hold in place. And everything good has gone with him.
First Father, then Calipher, and now this? My head spins, and it is as if the very ground below me is slipping away.
“I have to go,” I say. “I have loaves to bake.”
Bastus blinks back at me. “Do you understand what I just said?”
I stare down at the ground. “I…just….“
I just need to do something. Anything. I need something that I can control.
“What is that in your hand?”
I lift my fist and stare. The necklace is still in it. I pull it close to my chest.
“Calipher gave it to me.”
“It has a large amount of magic in it. I can feel it from here.”
You will always have a piece of me with you. That is what he said.
“He made it for me.”
“I would be careful with that, Nia,” he warns. “There is something unusual about it. Would you let me study it, before you do anything with it?”
He stretches a hand out, palm up, and waits. I stare at it. He thinks he can take my necklace from me? The very last thing I have of Calipher? Of course he wants to take it from me…he wanted to take Calipher’s place from the beginning.
“No.”
I put the necklace around my neck to make the message clear: This is mine, and I am not letting it go. As the chain settles around my neck, it circles me in a soft peace, an echo of Calipher’s aura. All will be well, it whispers.
Bastus pulls his hand back, and both curl into fists at his sides. His expression is impenetrable. He breathes in, ready to speak, but I cut him off. “Thank you for coming, Bastus. It is time to go.”
Then I shut the door on him, before he can say anything else.
CHAPTER 10
I BAKE LOAF after loaf to keep busy, but it is many days before I can bring myself to go into the village to trade them. I am not sure how many; they begin to bleed together.
It is only when I step out for the walk through the forest that I realize it has not rained—not once, since the terrible storm and my last night with Calipher. The sun is aggressive and moody, glaring down at me. The sky is wide and blank, without any sign of clouds. In town, the ground is so dry dust kicks up with each person’s steps, then, without any breeze to carry it, resettles.
The people are sluggish and edgy, a torpid puddle of bodies. The weather is on everyone’s minds as clearly as the sweat on their brows.
“Hector said they got rain in the next town a few days ago.” I overhear Taavi speaking to Shara as I approach the booths.
Shara shrugs. “And what? Hector says all kinds of things.” Her tone is clipped.
“If we can’t take it from Hector, then who? He is one of the only ones in this town who trades with anyone outside ourselves.”
Taavi’s eyes flit toward me and I almost think he sees me, but then they flit back.
“Do not worry about other towns. What good does it do?” she says.
“What good? It shows that what everyone is saying is true. The gods are withholding our rain because of that—” He stops mid-sentence as I approach, and throws his hands out in greeting. “The lovely Nia!”
“Nia, my dear, what have you today?” Shara echoes.
I look down to my empty hands and realize my basket is still at home.
“My regrets, I am not making trades. Not today.”
“Oh, but such a lovely woman should not be empty-handed!” Taavi exclaims.
Shara rolls her eyes and turns away to draw in more profitable customers.
I turn to leave, but Taavi rushes out from his booth to my side.
“Please, my dear,” he says, gesturing grandly as he holds out fruits for me to take. “A gift.”
“No, no, I have nothing to trade for it today. I will bring you loaves of bread tomorrow, and then I will trade with you.”
“Allow me to give you this modest gift. All I ask in return is a smile from the beautiful Nia.”
A choked laugh escapes me. I am so surprised I don’t know what to say. Taavi has always been kind, but this is not kindness. His words scrawl uncomfortably under my skin, making me want to pull away.
“Please!” he pleads. “Do not turn away my gift! I could bear anything but that.”
“Oh…”
He sees my hesitation, and he actually looks hurt. He presses again, his voice raising, and he kneels in front of me. A few other villagers glance our way, giving me a dirty look. His wife is just feet away, just returned to their booth.
Taavi worships his wife.
“Fine, fine.” I grab the fruits from his outstretched hands. “Are you feeling quite well, Taavi?”
“Always, when you are near. Better than well. Wonderful!”
“Well…I have to go. Go back to your booth.” I pull away from him. “With your wife.”
I do not know where I will go from here, but Taavi’s attention is strange. Unnerving, even. He is not himself. Perhaps it is the heat—it has taken a toll on us all.
“Nia!”
I turn toward another voice, confused. It is not Taavi this time, thank the gods, but who else would bother? The market is a place where people come to mingle, but not with me. Especially lately, with the rumors they have been passing about Calipher and me.
I realize with a strange wave of feeling that there was a time when I would have given anything for this attention, and not so long ago. But I am not that girl anymore, and my soul is raw and tender in Calipher’s wake. It is all I can bear to be alone right now. Coming into the village was a mistake. I am not ready for this yet.
A young man with golden-brown hair waves at me. It is Ferris, a boy I played with as a young child. We have hardly spoken in years. He pushes right through the others to get to me.
“Ferris?” He closes the last few feet between us and wraps his arms around me, fruits and all. “Ferris, what’s wrong?”
“What is wrong is that I love you, and I’ve only just realized it,” he says. “You must be mine.”
I am so shocked that a single bubble of laughter bursts from me.
“Why are you laughing?” he growls. “I said that I love you.”
His hand closes around my wrist, and it pinches.
I study his face. His eyes are wide and unfocused, tense around the edges, as if something urgent has happened.
But he cannot be serious. He hardly remembers I live here, most of the time.
“I do not understand—”
“You must be mine,” he presses. “You must. I cannot bear to be without you even one more turn of the sun.”
I try to pull away from his firm grip. He clings to me desperately, without reason.
This must be some sort of cruel joke. I know the village has been wary of my involvement with a First Creature, but this is too far.
“Ferris, stop this.”
“How can you expect me to stop, just as I have discovered how desperately I need you?”
His eyes are dilated so wide the bright blue of his irises are but a thin ring about a sea of black. They quiver at the edges, strange and unsteady. An uneasy buzz rises in my ears and my gut twists. If this is a gag, some way to shame me for my actions, it has gone too far.
Finally I break free of him, and I run, dropping apples in my wake. Or the closest to running that I can manage while weaving through the midday market crowd.
As I push my way through, more voices call my name, more hands reach out to grab me. At one point, a man lunges in front of another to get close to me, and the second man pulls him back and punches him in the face. I do not stop running until the forest trees hide me from the village and I am sure I am alone.
My heart won’t stop racing. I knew that the village had turned wary of me, but I have never know my neighbors to be so cruel. Suddenly, it all catches up with me, and I burst into tears.
“What is wrong?”
I jump to hear another man’s voice behind me, but when I see it is only Bastus, I am so grateful there are no words for it. I fling my arms around him.
“It was so strange,” I manage between sobs. “I have known these men all my life. I never known them to be so cruel. It was like they were possessed.”
He tightens his arms around me protectively, and guilt washes over me. I push away from him and stutter out an explanation of the strange behavior of the men in the market, men I have known most of my life.
“And the look in their eyes. Like the person I’ve always know them to be was replaced by something else.” I shudder.
Bastus leans toward me, his shoulders pulled in and tense. “All of them, they had the same expression?”
I pause to think. “Taavi and Ferris, yes. I am not sure of the others. I was too surprised. It did not make any sense.”
Bastus shakes his head. “I warned you,” he mutters.
“What do you mean?”
He sighs and looks at me reproachfully. “It is the necklace, Nia.”
“Calipher’s necklace?” I instinctively wrap my hand around the chain that dangles from my neck. It is hard to say his name. “What could any of this have to do with the necklace?
“I told you, it’s drenched in magic,” he says. “Whatever Calipher did to it, it is affecting the people around you. Did Calipher say anything when he gave it to you?”
“He said….” I sigh. I don’t want to think about that. Not ever, but especially now, when I am so upset already. “He said Theia was calling him back and he would not be coming back this time. That he wanted me to always be loved by someone the way he loved me. That this was a way I could always have a piece of him with me.”
Bastus’ whole body goes rigid. “Nia, take the necklace off.”
“No!” I pull away, even though he has made no gesture toward me.
“Do you not get it? He charmed it with some kind of love spell. Let me have it, and I will destroy it for you.”
He stretches out his palm and waits.
I stare down at it, the necklace gripped so tightly in my palm its rough corners dig into my skin. Inside my chest, I can feel it resisting, knotting around my heart and taking root.
“It is mine.” It is all I can think to say. It is mine, it is the last of Calipher I have, and I am keeping it.
“You must, Nia. It is the only way. This is no joke. If you go on wearing it, what just happened in the village is only the beginning.”
For a brief pause, I waver. A quiver of fear runs through me. But then a hot surge of anger bursts over it, and I am all sparks and licking flames. How dare Bastus tell me what to do, as if I am some helpless child still?
“Worse? From a love charm? Please,” I sneer. “You are only jealous that I cling to what Calipher left me, instead of running to you.”
His face crumples in a way I have never seen before—somewhere between injured and outraged.
“Jealous!” he cries. “Of what? Of loving his own Will so much he had to be called back by his goddess?”
His expression wrings at my heart. I almost wrap my arms around him, I almost apologize and beg him to forgive me—explain that I don’t understand what is wrong with me lately, but I want to set it right again.
But then something else stirs inside me. It is more than anger, more than grief. So he is mad? Good. Let him be mad.
“You have to listen to me, Nia. Everything is going wrong right now. Even the humans can feel it—can’t you? Magic can interfere—just like what you have around your neck. It can make things worse. It is dangerous.
“I am not sure what he has done, but it is like he used his angel’s magic to cast a charm that belongs to Gloros. I do not think he meant for all this to happen, but something went very wrong. The gods’ magic is not for us to mix.
“Just let me—”
He reaches toward me—toward it—as he speaks.
“No!”
It bursts from me in a wild shriek, a sound I did not even know I could make. At the same time, my arm swings wildly in front of me, casting him backward.
As he stumbles backward, trying to regain balance, his eyes are wide and startled, reflecting back my own surprise at what I have done. I did not know I had such strength in me. Did I even touch him?
Does it matter? the voice inside me prompts. It is what he deserves, if he is going to interfere.
“No, Bastus. Calipher gave it to me.”
Calipher’s warm peacefulness pulses out of the necklace and floods my chest.
All expression fades from Bastus’ face until it is completely blank.
“Nia. Calm down. You have to understand—”
“I do not.”
He bites his lip. His arms move out to his sides, his hands stretching out as if cautiously approach a wild animal.
“Magic like what you have dangling around your neck right now…it is not a decoration. It is not a toy. And it is not meant for humans.”
I am fed up with everyone treating me like I need protection. Like I am made of glass.
“Calipher would not give me something dangerous,” I retort. “I think I can handle a necklace.”
“Look Nia. I know it is hard for you to understand, but there is something wrong with Calipher. He hasn’t been himself for a long time.”
“Are you saying I broke him?”
“No! Nia….” Bastus takes a deep breath and looks back to me. “Actually, yes. It is not your fault. But yes, when Calipher chose you over Theia, it broke him.”
“That is impossible.” My voice is raw and my cheeks grow wet with tears.
“The magic that holds the realms in order is complex and subtle, and when set out of order, dangerous. Right now, everything is very, very out of order.”
I don’t know what to say. For a moment we both just stand there, me sniffling, him staring at the ceiling above my head.
“Nia, I know it does not feel right, right now. I know it is working inside you to protect itself. I can see it working at you.”
He takes a slow step forward, his arms still outstretched.
“I need you to trust me. I am not doing this out of jealousy. Or anger. Or hate. I do this for you, Nia. I do this from love. I know you do not see it right now, but you will. Give me the necklace.”
An anger bursts from my core like a firestorm. It burns away everything else like a purge.
“No.”
What happens next unfolds too quickly for me to understand. In a rush of smoke, Bastus closes the space between us and grabs the necklace, trying to steal it away from me. Just as quickly, there is a bright flash, and Bastus is thrust away again and crashes into a
tree.
For a breath, he just sits there where he landed. “Gods, Calipher, what were you thinking?”
I stand there and wait, my head buzzing, my fingers trembling—is it from the power I feel pulsing through me or fear?
When Bastus stands up and looks at me, I expect him to yell back, to mirror my rage. But instead, he steps away, toward the door. His blank eyes look me over with what feels like sadness.
“I’m here when you’re ready, Nia.”
And then he turns and walks away.
A swirl of guilt and shame wrestle through me—this is Bastus, my truest friend. And I just drove him away. I want to run after him. I want him to soothe me and tell me it will be all right, to hold my hands in his until they stop shaking.
But then the feeling rushes over me again, an echo of Calipher’s presence that swirls inside me and promises me it will be all right.
I stay put, and watch Bastus disappear into the woods.
CHAPTER 11
I ONLY TRY to go to market one more time. That is enough for me to stop.
The men keep rushing to me, grabbing at me. It is worse than the last time. They crowd around me, fight to reach me, and I can hardly move around among them. I am a little more prepared this time, and I manage to complete my shopping, but Shara and the traders don’t seem pleased at the mess I bring to their doors. At least, the ones who are not after me. This time I know it can’t possibly be a joke.
Eventually a fight broke out. The hit was like cracking glass, breaking something in the tension, and everything blew to pieces.
I ran. And I will not go back.
Just when I believe I am safe and out of sight from the village, a hand grabs my arm. Ferris saw me as I tried to slip away down the path, and insists on making sure I get home safely—as if there is anything out here to harm me, besides him.
He stays on my tail the entire way to my door. When I open it, he shifts as if to follow me in when I open the door. I have to pull it quickly behind me and lock it to keep him out.
He does not turn back to town after I shut him out. He stands there in the yard the rest of the day, in the unforgiving heat. He is still there when Mother comes home.
Rain, Chronicles of the Third Realm Wars #0 Page 5
