That particular complaint brought the combined councils of Noveni and Rey'kil together most often. Leaders from both sides wanted the Noveni transplanted to Moerta faster than was feasible. The land could only support so many more people each year, no matter how quickly it regenerated after the poison of untamed star-metal was removed. Mrillis and Ceera were relieved when the hotheads among the Noveni went to Moerta to live, instead of staying behind to foment unrest. They were even more relieved when some of the angrier Rey'kil warriors and nobles decided they were happy with the trickling evacuation, and stopped attending the meetings, no longer urging Noveni to leave Lygroes at a faster rate.
Every spring, Ceera took her ladies through the long tunnel under the sea to Moerta, to find tiny pockets of land where star-metal stubbornly remained in the soil, preventing re-growth. These spots of poisoning became easier to pinpoint as the land regenerated, but at the same time they grew farther apart. Sometimes they were only a bowshot in diameter, and buried in thick forests. She enjoyed the exercise, hunting for star-metal and able to put off her duties as Queen of Snows for a moon's length.
The spring Athrar turned nineteen, Ceera said nothing about the journey and made no preparations to go at her usual time. Mrillis was busy, away for half a moon on Wynystrys, helping to train two new Valors who came from Encindi bloodlines and were understandably reluctant to go to the Stronghold and face the Queen of Snows for their final testing and training.
He thought nothing of the delay in preparations for the yearly expedition, even though all the snow had melted from sight by the time he returned to the Stronghold. He and Ceera always tried to steal as much private time together as possible, and when he did realize the time of year and the change in her routine, he assumed she had simply delayed her departure to spend a few days with him before leaving.
By the sixth day after his return, however, he realized that Ceera and her ladies should have been packed and waiting for the Noveni representatives of the Warhawk's Council, who usually accompanied them on the hunt-and-cleanse trips. Mrillis said nothing, assuming the work was done and he had simply been too tired or too preoccupied to hear when someone mentioned the date of departure. Maybe the Noveni had been delayed, and he hadn't heard when someone said so?
The more he thought of it, though, the more wrong that assumption felt. Mrillis focused his attention on the usual bustle of the Stronghold, watching the children on their errands and going to their lessons, listening to the ladies talk as they prepared medicines or wove or performed the hundreds of tasks the Queen's ladies had performed from time immemorial. This was something more than him just being preoccupied.
Ceera, he realized abruptly, was more preoccupied than he had been. He took to creeping into her office or the common room or their private quarters, to catch her unawares. More often than not he found her sitting and gazing at something that wasn't there. She wouldn't move until someone called her name or made a noise loud enough to intrude on whatever thoughts filled her mind.
She wasn't conversing with someone through the Threads--he would have sensed that, even if she had shielded from him with all her strength. And why would she do that, anyway?
Chapter Six
It was no comfort to Mrillis that many times when he caught Ceera unawares, she had a soft, sometimes trembling smile on her lips. He'd never seen her wear such an expression before, and it worried and irritated him, to see a side of her he had never seen before. Hadn't they grown up together? He thought he knew everything about her, just as he was sure she knew everything about him.
That was when he realized the unsettled feeling growing in his belly was worry. Something had happened to Ceera. She had changed. She had learned something or taken a step.
Without him.
He berated himself for two days about being a ninny, worrying like he had. Ceera wouldn't leave him behind. She was likely trying to discern whatever it was, come to grips with it herself, before she turned to him. Still, when he tried to remember a time she had resolved a problem before sharing her concerns with him, he couldn't think of one incident.
Mrillis waited for a particularly quiet evening for just the two of them, when the ladies were busy with the children or taking long walks on the cliffs with their husbands and sweethearts. He knew they had no better chance of uninterrupted privacy. He watched her for nearly ten minutes, smiling and staring into nothingness, and it made him ache not to know what filled her mind. If that was childish or selfish, he didn't care anymore. "Ceera?"
Ceera looked up and her eyes brightened. "Love?" Her soft, secret smile bloomed into something rich and quietly joyous. None of the sparkle of mischief and triumph that he had grown up seeing.
That change worried Mrillis just as much as anything else. "What are you thinking?" He hurried to shut the door of their quarters and strode to the window seat where she perched with her back to the sweetly scented, cool night.
"About the future." She sighed contentment when he scooped her up to sit on his lap.
"A good one?" Mrillis stroked her shining, unbound hair back from her face. "Plans?" He nearly laughed at the relief that spilled through him, warm and bubbling. Had he really doubted her?
"As much as can be planned. There are some things even the Queen of Snows and the greatest enchanter of the ages cannot control." She wrinkled up her nose at him, earning a short bark of laughter. "Do you know what I like best about being married?"
"Since I can't choose, I have no idea."
"That's true." She sighed, ending in a giggle that was more like the Ceera he had known as a boy. "I've discovered something new. No matter how much we love each other, I fear we will both have a rival soon...but I'm not going to be jealous at all." She laughed aloud, a bright, chiming sound, when he could only shake his head in confusion.
"I will never love anyone more than you."
"I didn't say more. Don't be silly." She pretended to struggle a little when his arms tightened around her. "This rival...we will love differently from how we love each other, but just as much."
"Ceera ..."
"I think... I'm still not completely sure... I kept waiting to be sure before I told you...but I can't not tell you any longer." A squeal escaped her when he resorted to his old trick of tickling her to get her to talk sense. "I think we're going to have a baby," she whispered, as she slid her arms around his neck and tucked her head into the curve of his neck and shoulder.
Mrillis froze. All the dangers and alarms and tests he had faced through the years hadn't prepared him for this shock. He wanted to shout, but he couldn't breathe. He wanted to jump to his feet and leap to touch the ceiling, and maybe dance up the walls for good measure, but he held Ceera in his arms and suddenly feared dropping her. Especially now, with that precious new life inside her.
A baby. Their child.
He laughed, feeling relief and a strange, exhilarated kind of fear. Rey'kil often didn't have children until their forties, because of their long lives. He and Ceera had naturally talked about children, but growing their family had been a 'someday' far in the future. Not now. He was only twenty-nine, Ceera was twenty-seven; they were still very much children themselves, despite the heavy burdens that had rested on their shoulders for years.
"A baby," he whispered, tasting the word, feeling the strange change in it, now that it applied to him, to Ceera, to them.
"Thank the Estall, you're just as stunned as I was when the idea first occurred to me," Ceera whispered. Her breath tickled against his neck. "Can you imagine? Us? Parents?"
"I'm trying." He cuddled her closer, suddenly afraid of crushing her. Ceera had never felt so frail and slight in his arms as she did right this moment. His laughter escaped in a nervous, relieved bubble of sound. "No wonder you haven't talked about going to Moerta like usual."
"Oh." Ceera sat up, hitting his cheekbone with her nose. They laughed and she let him adjust her to a more comfortable position, conducive to talking and looking at each other. "I completely fo
rgot."
"I'll wager there are plenty of people wondering what's happened to you." He sighed and put on a disappointed frown. "I wouldn't be surprised if three or four have already guessed the truth."
"I wouldn't be surprised if the entire Stronghold knew about our baby before we did." She gasped and flashed him a bright, trembling smile, and pressed both her hands over her abdomen. "It feels so strange to say it. Our baby."
* * * *
Ceera delegated Triska to lead the team hunting for star-metal in Moerta. Later, Mrillis wished he had thought of that tactic. In the four days it took to assemble the team and prepare for the journey, Triska showed a bright, eager, happy face and attitude to the world. She was a joy to be around and her laughter rang out more in those few days than it had in what felt like several years.
The thought of having several moons free of Triska's constant presence pleased him so intensely, it startled him. Then when he thought about it, he realized that her presence had become irritating. Everywhere he went in the Stronghold, he was sure to find Triska either pathetically eager to learn everything and do everything she could, to prove her worth as Queen's Heir--or, what was worse, sulking because she didn't have the respect and authority she thought she had earned. He wondered if it was just him, because there seemed to be an unspoken competition between him and Triska for Ceera's time and affection.
Triska's delight in being given new responsibilities made her almost oblivious to Ceera's announcement of her pregnancy. Certainly she didn't pause very long to participate in the impromptu celebration. He wondered what Triska's reaction would be when it occurred to her that she might have been given the honor and duty of heading the start-metal hunting team because of Ceera's pregnancy, and not solely because of her skills and strength of imbrose.
"And unfortunately, that's very true," Ceera said, when he shared his thoughts with her several days after the hunting party had left for Moerta. They walked along the shore of the Lake of Ice in the evening gloom, enjoying the cool air and the privacy. "Have you noticed how much more pleasant the general atmosphere of the Stronghold is, starting immediately after the team left?"
"Ah. I thought it was just me. Jealous of Triska's demands on your time, just as I was jealous of Endor." He pretended great pain when Ceera lightly punched his arm.
"No need for jealousy, ever. When will you get that idea through that incredibly thick skull of yours?"
"Maybe by the time--" Mrillis barked laughter as a new thought occurred to him. "Maybe by the time we're grandparents, love." He laughed more when that mental picture stopped Ceera short, with her mouth hanging open. He hooked his arm through hers and guided her along the shore again. "Truthfully... I don't know if I should be relieved that the strain and sense of dissatisfaction isn't all my imagination. Triska seems almost desperate, grimly so, to learn everything a Queen of Snows needs to know, to have the strength and control and understanding of magic now, instead of after years of study. I think it makes her snappish and intolerant of any flaws she might perceive in others."
"Only perceived, I can assure you," she said with a sigh. Ceera slid her arm a little more securely through his and leaned her head against his arm as they walked.
"How do we make her understand that she won't have to take over your responsibilities for many decades, maybe even a century?" Mrillis muttered, thinking aloud.
"Maybe that is what bothers her," Nainan offered as she slid down off one of the massive boulders that overlooked the lake. Dressed in gray, her red hair tucked up into a gray cap, she blended well with the gloom of approaching nightfall and the spectrum of gray shades around the lake. She offered a thin little smile of apology when her entrance into the conversation startled them both, and shrugged. "You're not the only ones who have noticed the difference since Triska went to Moerta. Others have spoken to me about it. They like the change." She shook her head. "Ironic, isn't it?"
"What is?" Ceera rested her hand on Nainan's shoulder. The sympathy and warmth in her eyes made Mrillis wonder if his wife saw something, knew something, about Endor's sister that she hadn't shared with him.
"I used to be the one everybody complained about. Even though I'm stronger, faster in learning, Triska is the better choice between us. Or at least, she was." She sighed. "People come to me now, to ask me to approach you about her. She's changed, they say, since you formed the Zygradon."
"Do they say why?"
The only answer Mrillis got was a shrug. She wouldn't meet his eyes. "Why do you say 'they say'? Don't you agree with them, about the changes? She's your sister."
"I don't spend much time with Triska."
"Nainan has become quite a healer," Ceera said, "sensing with a touch what it takes other healers hours to decipher. In another few years, when Andienha gives up her position as head healer, I think you would make a wise choice as her heir."
Mrillis was surprised to see a blush of pleasure warm Nainan's milk-pale complexion. Somehow, he had never thought she would be so softened, so gentle, that the praise of others would mean anything to her. It was as if Triska and Nainan had exchanged hearts.
That's a frightening thought, he said to Ceera in their mental link.
Something to consider, all the same, she responded.
"It doesn't require me to touch anyone, sometimes, to discern what is happening inside their bodies," Nainan offered. She tipped her head, drawing attention to Ceera's hand still resting on her shoulder. Her smile quirked with mischief and a tiny snort of laughter escaped her when Ceera yanked her hand away.
"I don't want to know if we're having a daughter or a son," Ceera blurted.
"How would I know?" Nainan widened her eyes in confused innocence. "Only the strongest, most experienced healers can see into the womb and examine the child growing there. I am happy to tell you that you are both healthy and strong, and I sense no problems brewing." The sparkle faded in her eyes. "Lady Le'esha gave me the courage to try, to keep learning, to find what fed my soul. She had faith in me turning into someone worthwhile, even when everyone else dismissed me as my father's daughter."
"Nainan--" Mrillis stumbled, unsure what he should say.
"They were right, you know. Our father did wrap us in spells, to make us into hidden weapons, if his fortress should ever fall and we were taken to live among his enemies. Triska was too young, her mind too new and smooth for the magic to dig its roots in. I won't say that it was the magic alone that made me push you into the cistern, Ceera, when we were children. I didn't like you, mostly because I wanted to be like you. But I only wanted to hurt you. The spell wanted you dead."
"And now?" Ceera murmured, as she reached out and took hold of both of Nainan's hands.
"It has let go of me. I'm useless to it. Triska is the one in danger. I think that's the problem with her. The magic is like a living thing. Our father has pulled it off of me, like a net made of living thorn vines, and he's trying to catch Triska and use her, because she's your heir. He keeps scratching her, but he hasn't caught her yet." A tiny gasp escaped her. "Protect her, Queen of Snows. I fear for her."
Dropping a curtsy to them, Nainan tugged her hands free and hurried away, around the curve of the pebbly shore. Her footsteps echoed off the ice, muffled a moment later by the mist that hung perpetually over the surface in the summer's heat.
"The Three Drops of Blood?" Mrillis murmured, when he was sure she was beyond hearing.
"I pray not. Then she is the one who must wait, and Triska the one who will abominate." Ceera shuddered.
"Wait for what?" He wrapped his arm tight around her waist, drawing her up close against his side. "Well, at least we can depend on her to protect everything we want to keep secret about our baby."
"Hmm, perhaps. But how much will we be successful? I feel like everyone is watching me, every bite of food I take, every step, every slip, every yawn." She visibly shook off the mood Nainan's revelations had cast over them, and offered him a smile that had only a shadow of her usual mischief.
<
br /> "And depending on how long it takes until you get fat, we'll have people worrying that you're getting big too fast, or not fast enough." He laughed when his words earned a disgusted look. "That will be an amazing sight to see, love." He snorted at the image that filled his mind. "Like a seed pod with a melon inside instead of a seed."
"A seed pod?" Ceera squeaked, and struggled to get free of his hold.
Laughing, they pretended to fight, she twisting free and he holding her tight against him, until the wrestling brought them face-to-face. Mrillis slid his arms down around her and captured her laughing mouth with his in a long, sweet kiss that made his blood sizzle in his veins. He felt an echo of his reaction in Ceera's body and heart, and wished they could be like this forever, holding onto this precious, happy, carefree moment, full of such hope and dreams.
* * * *
Endor obtained permission to be re-assigned to Triska's guard. From the few communications between him and Mrillis, the siblings enjoyed being together. Mrillis was glad for the improvement in both Endor's and Triska's spirits. When Triska led her star-metal hunting party home just past mid-summer, Endor came with his sister to visit the Stronghold, and ostensibly to visit Nainan. On her part, Nainan expressed quiet surprise that Endor even remembered she existed. Her comment stayed in Mrillis' thoughts as he and Ceera went to the door to the tunnel to wait for the hunting team to return to the Stronghold.
"Are you sure that's wise?" Ceera murmured, as the two of them took their places at the front of the welcoming party.
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