by Lucinda John
“You have to eat sweetie. I understand that you’re grieving, but you still have a baby growing in your womb. The baby feeds off you. When you’re stressed, it stresses the baby. So please get yourself together for the baby’s sake,” she said.
“I didn’t even get a chance to say goodbye,” I cried.
“Maybe it wasn’t meant for you to say goodbye,” she replied, confusing me.
“Smoke will always be here for you and my grandchild. Eat t up and get some rest.”
Instead of arguing with her, I decided to eat as much as I could keep down. I forced myself to eat enough soup so that my baby would be well nourished . The thought of having another boy was exciting yet scary. I was petrified that I would fail this baby by not carrying him to full term. Zana was right, the well-being of my baby is more important at the moment, so I just prayed that I would wake up and this would all just be one bad dream.
Even though I walk through the darkest valley, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me.
I kept repeating to myself Psalm 23:4 to myself as I walked down a long white hallway. There was no end to the hallway, it seemed like the more I walked the longer the hallway extended. When I finally reached the end of the hallway my body froze, it was as if my feet were glued to the ground.
Sitting on an all-white bench was my father and son dressed in all white. They just sat there smiling and waving at me and as bad as I wanted to run to them, I couldn’t. My feet were planted firmly right where I stood. I stood there with tears streaming down my face, watching my father and son play. They were having so much fun and I wanted to join them.
“Where are you going, ma?” A voice said, causing me to turn around.
When I did, I came face to face with Smoke. He looked at me with open arms, inviting me into his embrace. I just stood there looking at him in shock. The closer he walked towards me, the faster my heart started to beat. When he was finally close enough for me to feel his breath on my skin, he bent down and kiss my belly with a huge smile on his face.
“Are you trying to leave me CheChe?” He asked looking up at me.
“I thought you were-”
“Shhhhh, I’m here baby,” he said standing up. He wrapped his massive arms around me and I swear I died and went to heaven, if I wasn’t already there.
“Take care of my baby,” a voice behind us said.
Turning around, my father and son was standing at the end of the hallway. Smoke reached over and gave my father a handshake then tickled Kareem. Then all of a sudden, my father and Kareem disappeared, I turned around and Smoke was gone as well. The hallway started to dissolve, until it disappeared.
I jump out of my sleep in a cold sweat. Looking around my room I could see the bowl of soup Zana made me and the saltine crackers on the night stand. Next to me was Shantika tucked under the blanket, softly snoring. It was all a dream, but it felt so real. Unable to go to sleep, I walked over to the picture Smoke and I took at a concert we attended a few months back. His smile in that picture was so contagious that it caused me to smile.
For the first time ever, I felt my baby kick. This baby was so shy, which was why I didn’t know he existed. With my hand on my belly, I rubbed every kick until he grew tired. I didn’t know how I was going to get over Smoke’s death, but It was just something I had to take day by day.
Chapter 26
Journi
I was one hundred percent back to being myself and running things. Between the mob and running the empire without Smoke, shit was starting to become overwhelming. Through it all I tried my best to make time for Shantika like I promised. Instead of staying in hotels and getting rest, when my meeting were over, I would get on the jet and head straight home. All of this shit was taking a toll on a nigga, but a man who don’t work don’t eat.
Today I was spending the day with Shantika and Karrueche, taking them shopping and shit like that. I knew Karrueche was hurting to the core behind losing Smoke, but she was trying her hardest to keep it all together. After a few days of mourning, she pulled herself together and got back on her hustling by going back to school.
“Damn girl, it’s like that belly grew overnight,” I said rubbing her mini basketball size baby bump.
“I know. One minute I had a slight bump, now I have a full belly. It was as if the baby was waiting for me to find out about him before blowing me up,” she replied.
She was dressed casually in a pair of tights with one of Smoke’s dress shirts hanging loosely off one of her shoulder. On her feet was a pair of Jay’s, which she started rocking a lot lately. Her skin showed evidence of her pregnancy as it glowed. She was looking very pretty wearing her natural color hair. If my dawg were here, he would have been drooling over her right now.
“How does this look baby?” Shantika asked walking out of the dressing room in a tight purple halter dress.
“Where do you think you going wearing that?” I asked.
“Out. This could be one of my going out dresses.”
“The fuck it ain’t. If you don’t put that shit back on that rack I know something,” I snapped.
The way Shantika ass looked in that dress was unacceptable. There was no way in hell I was going to let her leave the house dressed like she didn’t have a man at home. Fucking around with Shantika and that fat ass she had, I was going to have guns locked and loaded on me at all times.
“Bae, chill. See, it passes the fingertip rule,” she said extending her hands.
“I don’t care man. I see all of your ass on display. Nah it ain’t even finna go down like that go put that dress back,” I snapped, causing Karrueche to giggle.
“You get on my nerves.” Shantika rolled her eyes.
“And so does that dress, now take it off,” I demanded.
Sucking her teeth, she walked back into the dressing room and did as I said. I wasn’t trying to control what she wore. It was just certain things a man shouldn’t allow his woman to wear out in public. I see motherfuckers walking around with their girls dressed in those coochie cutters spandex shorts and crop tops like that shit was cute. I was too much of a reserved nigga to let my chick walk out the house like a thot.
Twenty five thousand dollars later and the girls were finally done shopping. Next time, I knew not to set myself up for the kill by offering to take them to the mall again. When Shantika and Karrueche felt the need to have another one of these shopping sprees, I was just going to hand them my back card and tell them to go about their business. They took entirely too long in the stores just to come out with one item, sometimes empty-handed. I didn’t understand the art of women shopping and I didn’t want to.
“Stacks wants me to fly down to Columbia,” I said to Shantika as we were driving home. We had just enjoyed dinner at Longhorn Steakhouse and were now heading back to our house from dropping Karrueche home.
“Why?” She asked.
“I have no idea, he just told me to be there at nine o’clock sharp.”
“And when were you going to tell me?” She sassed.
“Chill out, I just found out,” I replied, showing her the text.
“How long will you be gone?”
“I have no clue. You think you can hold that pussy down for me?” I smirked.
“Nah, I might just have to call up an old flame.” She laughed.
I smashed my feet on the breaks hard, causing her to hit her forehead on the dash.
“Fuck with me if you want to,” I warned.
“Journi, that shit hurt,” she whined.
“That’s nothing compared to what’s going to happen to you if you keep fucking with me.”
“Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Just wake me up and drop me off over to Karrueche’s house in the morning.”
“Are you going to give me some tonight?” I asked.
“You don’t have to ask for what’s yours,” she purred, causing my dick to get hard.
“Handle him for me
,” I said looking down at my growing dick.
“Keep your eyes on the road,” she warned.
“I got it,” I replied, putting the car on cruise control.
She reached over and pulled my dick out. With the Now-or-Later still in her mouth, she sucked me off real good. The way she was sucking the soul out of my dick had me so dizzy that I had to pull over to prevent from crashing. Before I could let off, I pulled my dick out of her mouth and pushed her panties to the side. I slid her hot pussy down my aching dick, wrapped my hands around her waist and fucked her while she cried out in pleasure. Just as we both were cumming, there was a tap on the window.
Looking up, I saw flashing red and blue lights behind us.
“Shit, we are about to go to jail for having sex in public,” Shantika panicked.
“Chill out,” I smirked.
I adjusted my dick in my pants, then rolled down the window.
“How can I help you officer?” I smiled, realizing it was a woman cop.
“It’s illegal to be parked here,” she said looking in the car, when she laid eyes on my dick that was still hard, a smile graced her lips.
“I’m sorry officer, my girl and I were just talking.”
“It didn’t look like you too were talking,” she said looking over at Shantika, who was discreetly trying to fix her skirt.
“I’m going to have to give you a ticket,” she said pulling out her pad.
“Understandable,” I replied.
I looked over at Shantika and gave her a wink. Poor girl was scared shitless to the point that it was funny. Tough old Shantika scared of a pussy ass pig. I made a mental note to clown her ass when we got home.
“Here you go, and next time get a room,” the officer said before handing me the ticket.
I was confused when I looked at the piece of paper. The only thing that was on it was her number and it read, call me. Shantika must have caught on to my confusion so she snatched the paper from my hand and read it.
“No this bitch didn’t, I should beat her ass,” she fussed, tossing the paper out the window.
“Oh, so now you tough? A few minutes ago, you was shaking in that seat,” I taunted her.
“Boy, shut up and drive.” She smacked her lips.
* * *
Before heading to Columbia, I gave Shantika enough dick to knock out that attitude she woke up with. When I made it to Stack’s father estates, I was in awe. No matter how many times I came here, my reaction was always the same. The car came to a stop in front of the mansion, and the butler came out to open the door for me.
“This way Journi,” the butler said bringing me to the conference room where we always met.
“What’s good?” I said walking in the room.
“What’s up, young blood?” Stacks replied.
“Where is everyone at?” I asked noticing that the rest of the fellas wasn’t in attendance. Every time we had a business meeting Ralph, Cole, and Chad would always fly up and join us.
“We don’t need them for this meeting. How are things going?” He asked.
“Considering Smoke being gone leaving me to run everything myself things are going good, it could be better if he was around to help me though,” I answered sadly. Yes, business was booming, but I knew if my right hand was with me we would be dominating shit together like it was supposed to be.
“I hear you. Check me out I want to commend you on doing a good job. You holding shit down for real. The fact that you decided to do everything yourself instead of filling Smoke’s spot says a lot about your character and loyalty,” he said.
“I’m trying, can’t no one take my partna’s place ya feel me,” I replied rubbing my hands together.
“Yeah, take a walk with me,” he said getting up from the table.
I got up and followed behind him until we came to some double wooden doors. He pushed through the door and the room instantly turned into a mini hospital. My heart started beating out of my chest when I looked over at Zana who was holding a straw to Smoke’s lips. How the fuck was this possible? I watched him be buried. I saw his lifeless body lying in that casket.
“What the fuck,” I said causing both Zana and Smoke to look up at me.
“We faked his death because the streets were too hot for him,” Stacks said.
“Damn, you couldn’t have let a nigga in on the secret?” I asked.
“We needed everyone to be as normal as possible just in case the killers were still out their lurking.”
“But I told you who was behind this,” I snapped.
“We lost them.”
“You lost them?”
“Last location we had on them was in Columbus, but when we moved in they were gone. The only people we found in the house was the bodies of his mom and kids.”
“So, them motherfuckers still out there?” I asked.
“Yes, that’s why we’re keeping him here until we handle that. Smoke requested to see you so I’m going to leave the two of you alone. Ms. Zana, do you know how to bake cookies from scratch?” Stacks asked.
“Yes, the best cookies you’ll ever eat,” she smiled.
“Do you mind helping me? My wife is craving some and our nanny is on vacation.”
“No problem baby,” she replied kissing Smoke on the forehead before following Stacks out the door.
Once I heard the wooden doors close shut, I walked over to Smoke’s beside and took a seat in the chair Zana was sitting it.
“Damn bruh you’re alive.”
Yes you know they couldn’t hold a real nigga down.
He wrote on the white board. Since he still had the wires in his mouth it was difficult for him to talk.
“Karrueche is going to go wild when she sees you.”
I know I miss her little ass, how she been holding up?
“I ain’t gon lie she was real fucked up in the head. I could still tell she’s hurting, but she’s starting to come around. She went back to school and shit,” I said
How’s my baby?
“He’s good, she getting big as hell though. CheChe ain’t lil no mo.” I chuckled.
Lol.
“On the real, I’m glad you ain’t dead. This shit was starting to depress a nigga.”
Ol’ soft ass. Lol.
“Now that I think about it imam need you to give a nigga his Rolex back, that shit was clean as fuck and it cost a pretty penny.” I joked.
Stacks was telling me about that, I wish he would have let a nigga kept them shits.
“On the real you had a nigga all in his feelings and shit. Dawg, I knew your ass was Tupac dead. I had a feeling your ass was going to pop up out the blue.”
We gotta handle Tangi and Geek’s bitch ass.
“I’m on it.”
Damn I miss Karrueche, look out for her until I touch down. Don’t have her smiling in no lame nigga’s face while she pregnant with my seed.
“You already know I gotchu.”
Respect. A nigga getting tired and shit.
“Get you rest nigga, it’s work time when you get out this bitch.”
You already know.
I sat in silence and watched as Smoke drifted off to sleep. They had this nigga doped up with some heavy morphine. To say a nigga was relive that Smoke was still alive was an understatement. Stacks ass was a genius. I wouldn’t have thought that all this shit was fake. He had everything down to the T. Hell, that nigga even had a dead body lying in Smoke’s casket.
“I need you to keep this between us. Tangi is a trained killer, she is a powerful hitman and is hired by all types of people trying to get rid of their enemies. The body count on that chick is something serious. I know she ain’t dumb enough to start no shit here, but I would still appreciate it if you kept this between me, you, and Zana.”
“I gotchu,” I nodded.
“Good looking out, now come outside and put one in the air with me.”
Stacks and I made our way
to the top floor balcony to get our smoke on.
“Damn, a nigga scared of heights and shit why we had to come all the way up here?” I asked sealing my blunt close.
“The wifey be tripping about the weed smell. You know she’s pregnant and shit, that’s when they can smell all types of shit,” he replied.
“Ol pussy whip nigga.” I laughed.
“I know you ain’t talking. You the same nigga that was walking around mad at the world because you was beefing with your girl. I remember that shit. Don’t front cuz y’all good now,” he shot back.
“Chill out.” I blew a cloud of smoke out my nose. “On the real, nigga you’re a genius for that shit you pulled. I would have never guessed that was a fake funeral.”
“Yeah, I’m good at faking deaths and shit.” He laughed. “But on the real, you and that nigga Smoke are some talented niggas. I look at y’all young bucks as my little brothers. I wasn’t trying to see no foul shit happen to y’all. Shit you ain’t know it, but I had niggas trailing your ass to make sure you was straight,” he replied.
“You’re on your shit.”
“I have to be. I been in the game for far too long. I just don’t understand how I slip and let that bitch get away,” he sighed, taking in a deep toke from his blunt.
“We’re gonna get they ass don’t even worry about it,” I replied feeling the effects of the blunt. A nigga was feeling real good right now. I found out my boy was still alive, my bitch got good pussy, my money long, and this gas I was puffing on had a nigga on chill.
Chapter 27
Karrueche
“I have a surprise for you,” my mother said as she stood outside my house in front of 2016 Iridium Metallic GMC Yukon.
“What is it?” I asked.
We were supposed to be doing lunch and I was super hungry so I hoped she would hurry up so we could go.
“Here,” she said tossing me the car keys.
“This is mine?”
“Yup, all yours. You’re going to need a bigger car when my grandbaby arrives.”
She didn’t lie when she said a bigger car because this baby was huge. The color of the car was sick and the features was even sicker. The car was equipped with all types of bells and whistles. My favorite being the 4G hot spot. I was never a big fan of SUV’s, but I was in love with this car.
