by Dena Nicotra
“I don’t feel hunger, but I wish I could.” Kalan said.
“Oh. Sorry, I didn’t know.” Pepper said.
“It’s alright Pepper. But why don’t I help you weave something better for you two?”
“You could do that?” Pepper asked.
“Well, I could try.” He smiled and patted the ground for her to come and sit closer to us.
“Okay, concentrate on a really good meal that you’ve had in the past.” He coached.
I watched Pepper close her eyes and scrunch her nose. We waited. I have to say that this was super irritating in a way for me because I could have filled the hole to the rafters with food if I had my abilities. Better still, I could have weaved us to a restaurant or my own kitchen for that matter. Pepper opened her eyes and looked around. Then she jutted out her lower lip in a pout. “It’s no use. I’m just a really crappy weaver you guys.” She said apologetically.
“No you are not. Don’t give up. I think I know what the problem is. You can only weave for others right?” Kalan asked.
“Yes, that’s right.” Pepper said.
“You are a Mender.” Kalan said with a wry smile.
“A what?” I asked, my voice coming out a little too high.
“I think I remember my brother saying something about that when he was in the hospital.” Pepper’s thoughts allowed me to glimpse the moment that she was recalling.
“I saw. He always believed in you.” I said in an effort to comfort her.” Pepper smiled weakly at this.
Kalan continued to explain. “Menders are very special. Their abilities only apply to other weavers. Years ago, the dark weavers began to weave the children of menders into other mortal families in an effort to weaken us. They believed that without the knowledge of their abilities they would either never realize they had the gift, or they would be unable to use it properly. Because of this they are very rare in our world these days.
“My brother and I were adopted when we were babies. We never knew our birth parents.” Pepper said solemnly.
“I’m sorry Pepper.” I said.
“Don’t be, it’s okay, I think I understand a lot of things that I never did now.” Pepper sounded sincere, but I knew that this last bit of information hurt her deeply.
“My parents always had at least one mender in our kingdom at all times. They are like doctors in a way. They can tend to weavers with very special gifts.” I watched as Pepper perked up with pride as she absorbed this news.
“Try again Pepper, this time think of the same meal that you were thinking of, but instead of focusing on the food alone, think of how much Joey needs the nourishment. Think of her mental and physical health.”
Pepper nodded and shut her eyes again. Abruptly the dark space was lit by a beautiful crystal chandelier and a long table covered with a crisp white cloth appeared. It was laden with silver trays. The aroma of roast and potatoes filled my nostrils and I know that my mouth dropped. Pepper opened her eyes and jumped to her feet.
“Oh no friggin way! Did I do that?” She squeaked and looked from me to Kalan.
“You friggin did!” I said.
“Okay, okay, okay, wait a second” she said and shut her eyes again.
In the next moment, I felt the relief of my ribs as I breathed in.
“That was truly excellent mending Pepper. It’s been a long time since I’ve seen such a healing,” Kalan said.
“The pain is completely gone Pep, thank you!” I stood up and hugged her tight. Her smile was heartwarming. She looked at Kalan and nodded.
“I totally understand now.” She took my hand and pulled me toward the table. “You need to eat.” She said, and we both laughed. I pulled the cover off of one of the serving trays and steam wafted upward, filling my senses with delight. The roast was cut in slices and I took a piece with my fingers to nibble as I made my way down the table. I lifted the covers of others and found mashed potatoes, salad, and green beans. Behind me, Pepper was busy preparing another table with deserts. Cakes and puddings, crème brule, and pastries of every variety. There was yet another table with silver pitchers and glasses, and the scent of freshly brewed coffee followed.
“Oh my God Pepper, stop it already! We’ll never be able to eat all of this!” I laughed and shoved a warm roll in my mouth. She wasn’t even listening because she was so caught up in the newness of her skills.
“Oh do you like crab legs?” Pepper clapped her hands when I nodded at her. “This is way too cool!” She gushed. Sure enough, a huge platter of crab legs appeared on the table before me. Kalan was standing against the wall with a gigantic grin on his face. I think that he was wholly enjoying himself just watching us. I smiled back at him but it was half-hearted. My mind went back to an evening the two of us had spent together at his place eating spaghetti. He’d done the cooking and it was really good. My sweetie had no need to eat now. Caught somehow between current and past events, he was little more than an apparition. Recognizing the true scope of this, I lost some of my excitement over Pepper’s feast. My thoughts drifted to a myriad of times we had shared. Stolen memories that returned to me like lost children. The pain and joy mingled until my heart felt like it would explode. I ate with little enthusiasm though my stomach was very happy. Kalan stayed with me as long as he could.
I put my head in his lap, enjoying the comfort of listening to him and Pepper talking until I just couldn’t hold my eyes open any longer. I hated to squander even one second that I could spend with him, but I was exhausted. It takes a lot out of a person to recover memories apparently. I was vaguely aware of him fading as I drifted off to sleep.
The aroma of coffee woke me. I sat up and instinctively looked around for Kalan. Pepper silently handed me a cup, her expression full of sympathy. I sipped it gratefully. It was nice to have something warm to drink, and even nicer that she understood the sorrow that absorbed me. The air was cooler than it had been and I thought that I felt a bit of a breeze blowing in.
“He’s gone. It happened as soon as you fell asleep.” Pepper said tenderly.
I wiped a tear from my cheek and cleared my throat. “I sensed it last night, but there was nothing I could do to stop myself from falling asleep.”
Pepper nodded and smiled at me. Her pale face expressed sympathy without the need for words. “I thought about sending a period of rest into your body, but he was gone before I could try and I was afraid to do anything after he uhm…disappeared.”
“That was probably wise Pepper.” I offered. In truth, I really wasn’t sure what would have happened. Everything with Kalan seemed so fragile. I knew that Pepper had spent a great deal of time considering the scope of her abilities, and what she might do to help Kalan. Ultimately, she was afraid and unsure of what tampering with Railey’s work might mean. I couldn’t blame her for that.
I stretched and stood to give my bones a chance to creak. At that point, something caught my eye. Someone was coming. I peaked around a huge chunk of a boulder and saw the outline of a person. Pepper and I exchanged glances. I feared it would be Railey and I wasn’t ready for that just yet. I lifted a silent prayer that if it was her, the good Lord would give me strength. Without the ability to weave I wouldn’t stand a chance. Pepper moved to stand in front of me and balled her small fists. It was a touching act. I knew that she would do anything to protect me; and although I felt pretty useless, I’d do my best to do the same for her.
I saw the outline of his hat, and allowed myself to breathe. My heartbeat was still thudding in my ears as Kess came into the light, his arms spread wide. “I’m unarmed ladies, you can drop your weapons.”
“We don’t have any weapons Kess, and I think you know that.” I spat. He just smiled that cocky smile of his and I swear that made me all the madder. Especially when his eyes seemed to be drinking me in like a pervert. Hello! I was abducted, beaten up, and robbed of my gifts by his wack-job evil sister.
“Well, well, well…defenseless and pretty. That’s a dangerous combination around me, y
ou do realize that right?” He shoved his hands into his pockets and cocked his head to the side. I glared at him and crossed my arms.
“Don’t even try to be funny right now. Kess. Your bitch of a si---“
“Don’t.” He said cutting me off.
“Don’t what?” I snapped. “Don’t say that she’s a vicious monster?” I stormed toward him closing the distance in seconds. I raised my hand to slap his face, but when he flinched, I caught something so vulnerable in his eyes that I dropped my hand and just stared at him. His eyes filled with tears and he dropped his head so that I couldn’t see his face.
“I’m so sorry Joey.” He muttered and looked back up at me. His bravado had disappeared. “I never meant for you to be hurt. You don’t even know how much it kills me to see you like this. If I could have—“
“How could you let her do this to me?” I shrieked.
“I had no choice.” He said with a long sigh and removed his hat.
“I hate you!” I said resolutely, and I meant it. I really did. How could I have been so stupid? He’d lured me right to her. He set me up, and in doing so, he had robbed me of my gift. Pepper came up behind me and put her hand on my shoulder. Her touch made me realize that I was sobbing and I didn’t want Kess to have that satisfaction. I squared my shoulders and held my head high.
“I hope that you are satisfied now. I hope that you feel good about yourself.” I said.
“I wish that I could explain.” He turned his back to me, and looked up as if he were searching for answers – or perhaps struggling to regain his composure.
“Can you give her back her abilities?” Pepper said. His shoulders hunched.
“No.” He said simply.
“Why not?” She asked.
“Because my sister is very powerful Pepper. More now than ever.” He was still facing the wall rather than us.
“I imagine it must be pretty hard to look people in the eye once they know you’ve betrayed them.” Peppers words were harsh, but I could not have expressed the feelings better.
I sat on the floor and wiped my face with the back of my hand. Pepper started pacing in front of me.
“What can you do? Why did you bother to come here if you cannot help us?” She said, her pitch rising. I could feel her frustration growing. Abruptly I realized that I did still have some of my ability. I could feel what Pepper felt. I could hear her thoughts…and I had somehow managed to pull Kalan to me, even in this condition. As I became aware of these thoughts I watched Kessler turn around. He lowered his gaze and looked at me with an expression that I had never seen before. His eyes were gloriously intense. Every hair on my head tingled. And in an instant I could hear his thoughts.
“Now you are getting it.” He said in his mind.
“Can you hear me?” I thought back.
“Of course love, I can always hear you. You forget to block.”
Pepper was still pacing and firing questions and while he answered her verbally, his mind talked with me.
“Get up and come to me. There is a glass vial in my pocket.” His words tingled like spikey little fires in my mind, and between each of them there was an image that made little sense to me. Without a word I got up and went to him. I moved at a snail's pace. I said nothing as I reached into his front pocket and pulled the tiny bottle out. Slowly I looked up into his eyes which were shimmering in the pale light. He mouthed the word “feed.” I tiled my head to the side and tried to comprehend. He just nodded. It was subtle, but I got it. I wrapped my left hand around the bottle and slapped him with my right. Pepper stopped short and looked back and forth at us, aware that she had missed something, but completely confused.
“What the hell?” She chirped. Kessler just smiled at her and winked.
“I’m really sorry ladies. It has been insanely fun, and I’m so sorry that things have turned out so badly for you, but I have to go.” He locked his gaze on mine and though he did not touch me, I felt his kiss brush my lips. I closed my eyes and squeezed the vial in my hand. “Take care of yourself Joey.” Kessler looked at me with unshed tears in his eyes. He raised a finger to his lips in the “shhh” fashion and smiled. Then he mouthed “I love you” to me. Before I could register the words, he removed his hat, and bowed deeply. A circus gesture that the show was over. In the next instant he was gone.
“Do you want to explain to me what the hell just happened?” Pepper said.
“I’m not really sure.” I replied and looked down at the small vial in my hand.
Kessler was gone, but he had done his best to tell me something, and he’d given me a tiny vial filled with silvery-white sand. I knew exactly what I was supposed to do next.
“Did you take something from him?” She questioned and looked down at the tiny bottle in my palm. “What is that?”
“Food.” I said. At the same time I understood the images he had shown me. Without hesitating, I pulled out the tiny cork and downed the content in one dry shot. My mouth was gritty and I found it extremely difficult to swallow. As I struggled, I could feel my veins pulsing and my mind became incredibly alert.
Pepper shook her head at me. “Do you want me to manifest a cold glass of water?” She squeaked. I nodded and then gulped the icy liquid as fast as I could. I still had sand in my teeth when Railey appeared in front of me.
“What have you done?” A female voice screeched, filling the small chamber we were in. I stood up and fought back the fear that threatened to swallow me whole.
“I said, WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?” The stone walls echoed her words and Pepper moved beside me.
“Don’t even think about it you red-headed little freak. You are no match for me and I will smack you down, do you hear me?” I watched in horror as Pepper’s nose began to bleed. She slid down to the ground without a word, and began vomiting.
Railey laughed and flicked her finger toward me. “You, have done something.” Her eyes narrowed, “I don’t know what, but whatever it is, it won’t help you.” She clasped her hands behind her back and sashayed toward me, pausing just a few feet in front of me. Her raven-black hair framed her face, making her the quintessence of a mean school-girl. God only knew what sadistic intentions raced through her depraved mind.
She came within inches of my face and her words were clipped as she spoke. “I have the master weaver ability now. So that makes you what you have always been. Nothing! I could send you back home and wipe your mind clean completely. She walked in a circle around me. “You know what? I really should stop wasting my time and do that.” She tossed her hair back over her shoulder and glared at me. “I should just do that right now.” She crossed her arms and smiled. She was enjoying herself and that was so obvious. “What a waste it was to give the master weaver skills to someone like you!” She paced in front of me and I watched her silently. My mind was racing for solutions.
“Do it Railey.” Lela hissed. Appearing from a dark corner, she stepped forward. Her long sandy colored braids were laced with leather strips, and I noticed she no longer looked quite human. The air was filled with a horrid stench as she approached. I glanced up and noticed that her face looked oddly elongated. Her eyes were sunk in and completely black. Her nose was more like a beak and it seemed to be growing as she spoke. I shuddered and tried not to meet her eyes, though her changing appearance had me captivated. She glared at me and her expression was so full of hatred that it made me flinch.
“You have everything you need now Railey!” Her head did an odd little twitch. “Jusssst end her wretched little life, and let’s go party!” She raised her twitching beak before snarling, “It stinks in here.”
“I will, I will, but not before I find out what she’s done. I feel a drain.” She huffed, and actually fanned her face with her hand for emphasis.
“That’s impossible, you have taken her power!”
“I’m serious Lela, something is not right, and I’m not leaving here until I know what it is she has done!”
“Well then we will make her TELL US!
” Lela screeched.
While the two of them argued and discussed how they would get information out of me, I knelt down with weak knees to check on Pepper. She was sick, and I realized with a certain level of panic that it was imperative that I do something to help her.
Pepper’s eyes had rolled back and just the whites were showing. I put my hand on her arm and was shocked at how cold she felt. I whispered her name, but she couldn’t hear me. She was no longer vomiting, but blood was dripping from her nose and ears and there was blood all over her t-shirt. She wasn’t conscious. I felt for a pulse. It was weak, but so relieved to find it was still there.
Lela shouted something in a language I couldn’t understand, and the next thing I knew Railey was on me again. Her fists rained down on my back with such force I could do little to defend myself. I was screaming and kicking but she had me on the ground. I rolled to get on top and with an unexpected burst of energy, I slapped her hard across the face. Her head jerked to the left from the force of it and she actually yelped. I didn’t hesitate before I hit her again, just as hard. I was feeling confidence flood through my body as I raised my hand up for the third time…I should have remembered Lela was behind me. She had her hands around my throat in an instant.
“That’s enough. You should have been destroyed a long time ago.” Her voice was cold and flat. I felt my air supply slipping as Railey squirmed out from under me and got to her feet. I couldn’t breathe. As my view narrowed to a pinpoint, I had just enough time to reach out and touch Pepper’s arm. I felt a warmth radiating within me, and then to my relief, Pepper was gone. I’d sent her home! I could hear Railey gasp as she realized what I had done. Lela began to chant loudly in that odd language, and before I lost consciousness, I thought of Kalan.
I heard his sweet laughter, and let myself linger in the thought of his lovable smile and cedar-scented hair. I could no longer feel my body, but it didn’t matter to me. Kalan was all that mattered….and then I felt the blood pounding in my veins.
Everything in me was on fire. All that I had been through raced through my mind. The loss of Kalan. My beautiful Kalan. Distantly I knew that Railey was kicking me again. I imagined Kalan’s bones on the ground in that awful place. A part of me felt strangely relieved at the thought of my own bones resting beside his when this was all over. Maybe then, maybe when my life was over there would be a way for us to be together. Then an image of my Mamaw filled my mind. Wandering through life, a shell of who she used to be. Completely lost. In that instant, I knew what I had to do.
