Letting Go

by Katie George

  Chapter Thirty-Six

  Joel

  JOEL SAT ACROSS from Misty Temprend, her daughter Sofia, and his father Ethan at a shady McDonald’s in the heart of Savannah. A homeless man ogled the coffee cup from which Ethan sipped, and eventually Joel got up and paid for a drink for the guy. Misty was more nervous than anyone Joel had ever seen before, and her daughter seemed anxious, too. Joel had arrived first, thirty minutes beforehand to collect his thoughts. It was only hours after John’s break-in at the Towson homestead, but Joel knew nothing of that event yet.

  Then Ethan had showed up, a few minutes early, his eyes surprisingly sober. He’d been kind and offered to buy Joel a large Coke. “I’m really sorry, buddy,” he said, poking Joel in the arm. “I’m sorry for those texts I sent you.”

  Joel had forgiven him, but he was on his guard. His dad had a secret history no one else knew about except his ex-wife, a woman, her child, and a random family. Joel still hadn’t exactly put together why Misty had been so touchy-feely at the Towson house to discover Ethan’s whereabouts.

  Misty and Sofia came a few minutes early too. Everyone felt the pressure and wanted to expel it.

  It was supremely awkward at first, as Ethan shook hands with little Sofia, who seemed to stare at him like he was a god. This angered Joel. Misty’s mien was more subdued, as if she was keeping her true emotions at bay deep within the well of her soul.

  Finally, Joel said, “Well, I don’t know how to start this, or even why I’m here, but let’s get this over. Okay?”

  “I like your plan,” agreed Ethan. “All I can do is make it up to all three of you—including your mother, Joel, and Chloe—is by working my entire life to earn your real forgiveness. Honestly, I’m not sure how to start.”

  “You can start by joining Sofia’s life,” whispered Misty. “She doesn’t have a father, and she needs you. I’m not afraid to admit that I can’t be the sole parent for her. She needs you, Ethan.”

  Ethan sighed, reaching his hand out in Sofia’s direction. She gently took his meaty ring finger, where a ring still remained in place. Sofia touched the metal band, feeling the smoothness of the object. “Of course. And I want to be there for you, Joel, and for Chloe also.”

  Joel was quiet, introspective. He pondered the past two months, and how much had changed. He was in an acceptance stage in his life. He’d come to terms with his parents’ divorce, and was trying desperately to accept it with arms wide open. His father was taking a step by meeting with him, Misty, and Sofia.

  As they sat awkwardly around a McDonald’s table, the four shared a moment not easily forgettable: A new family.

  After twenty minutes of awkward banter, the group dispersed, and Joel headed to his old Jeep. As he approached his rickety automobile, he heard someone call out behind him.

  “Hey, Joel.”

  He cocked an eyebrow as his father neared. He lifted out his hand and passed him a brochure from Manny’s funeral. Joel took it and choked down the pain. He blinked back the tears. “Dad, what is this?”

  “I went, Joel.”

  “Well, thanks, but that doesn’t exactly bring him back.”

  “Rob Fielder killed your friend, but he deserves forgiveness.”

  “I’ve forgiven him. I don’t think Manny’s parents have yet.”

  “Rob is a good guy underneath all that baggage. I’m just hoping, son, that if you can forgive Rob Fielder, you can forgive me too.”

  Joel took the program and wanted to shred it into a thousand little pieces. “Does Mom know?”

  “Of course she knows.”

  “Chloe?”

  “Not yet. I want to tell her myself.”

  Joel paused, unsure what to say next.

  “Joel, I’m serious. I’m sorry for how I treated you. When your mom threw me out, I was straight drunk for three or four weeks straight. It took a while, but I’m sober now. For three weeks, I’ve been sober, and I love your mother so much. I’m going to do everything it takes to win her back, and to reunite this family.”

  “Why Misty?”

  “It was a one-night thing. Nothing of significance.”

  “No, Dad, it was definitely something of significance. Sofia doesn’t deserve this ‘baggage’ at all.”

  “And neither do you, your mom, or Chloe.”

  “Dad, I had a dream once. That you and mom ended up in this lovers’ quarrel. It terrified the living daylights out of me.”

  “Dreams aren’t reality. You know that.”

  “But it felt real. What I really mean is that I’m open to forgiving you. It will take time, and nothing will be forgotten. Sofia needs to be part of your life, and she needs your devotion. Dad, I love you, but you didn’t necessarily devote yourself to me.” At this, Joel bit his tongue, desperate not to unfurl before his father. “And if you can, you need to make things right with Mom. The financial everything is in a twirl. I just lost my best friend, and I’m about to lose my parents too. Please, just please try to make things right with her.”

  Ethan reached out and brought his son to his chest. “I swear, Joel Sealet, I will try as hard as I was made to try.”

  AT WORK THE next Monday, Joel was busy sweeping the dusty floors near the stingrays when a young man lazily approached from the seahorse exhibits. A little longsnout seahorse seemed to gaze into his soul as he passed by. The young man’s lazy gait was further iterated by the glow of the overhead lights, which shined down on the fresh floors in dark purple and blue spectrums like a deep sea abyss far away from any touch of sunlight. Yet the mop of dark hair on Alex McFarland’s head was like a time machine, bringing Joel back to the beginning of the summer when he’d attained the guy’s wisdom on girls and his parents’ divorce.

  Joel set aside his mop, making sure his manager wasn’t spying from a nearby cranny. He smiled and reached out an arm, ready to welcome his friend, when Alex turned into a primal cobra who lashed out and punched him in the jaw. Joel fell backwards a few steps, clutching the bottom of his face, calling out, “What the hell, man?”

  “You knew, and didn’t tell me?”

  “Tell you what?”

  “That Karli Kirkpatrick is pregnant with my baby?”

  “What?”

  “How long did you know, Sealet? How long were you going to keep this little fun fact from me, when I thought I could trust you?”

  “Calm down, Alex. What are you saying to me? Please, slow down, and talk to me. Breathe.”

  Alex lashed out again, but Joel ducked and fell against a placard. He wondered how no visitors had managed to see this altercation. It was Monday, but daycares loved to explore on clear days, along with visitors from the city and other local areas.

  “Alex, stop it!”

  “I’m not going to stop until you tell me how long you knew. How long you kept this a secret from me.”

  Joel tried to think without being harassed by a hammerhead Alex. He dodged another punch attack before hissing, “A few weeks, tops. I was sworn to secrecy, and I’m sorry, but I thought you already knew. If I knew you didn’t know, I would have told you. If you haven’t noticed, jerkwad, a lot has happened in the past few weeks, including my best friend’s death. So you can go off and go be a baby daddy all you want, but to come into my place of work and punch me, wow, Alex. Who are you?”

  “The person you come to when you need advice. I thought you had my back.”

  “And I thought you had mine.”

  Alex slammed a hand against the wall, startling a school of little blue fish in a nearby tank. A group of older people appeared and with open mouths, called out, “Hello, young men!”

  Joel smiled and waved. He moved away from Alex, glad for the first time in a while he had a job. He was in a desperate need from any sort of respite away from his gutsy friend, and an old man with spaghetti-like hair growing from his nostrils called out, “I’m just so proud to see young men these days working! Look, Ruth, this young man knows about this here aquarium. Do you have any fun facts you could s
urprise my lady with?”

  The woman named Ruth stuck out a hand against her husband’s cotton shirt. A strand of pearls hung from her clavicles. She gently said, “I’m sorry, he loves bothering people.”

  “Of course I have some facts for you guys. You have any idea who the oldest sea creature is in the ocean?”

  “Well, obviously, a merman born in 1932. That would be me, of course, wouldn’t it, Ruth?”

  She rolled her eyes and said, “The sea turtle, right? My grandson always tells me about sea life. He’s from New Jersey. We’re here with some friends for the summer, traveling down to our house in Florida.”

  “That’s awesome, ma’am. Sir, good guess, but your lady definitely beat you there. The oldest tortoise researchers ever verified was a radiated tortoise—usually found in Madagascar—named Tu’i Malila, who was about 188-years-old.”

  “See, I told you, I’ve got plenty of time left,” said the old man, who elbowed his wife in the side. Their friends stood by, smiling, some with obviously fake dentures. They were an adorable foursome.

  “I don’t think you’re going to make 188, Richard,” said the other old man, who wore thick glasses.

  “But here’s the kicker,” Joel said, looking over his shoulder, pointing at their sea turtle tank twenty feet away. He began to walk closer to their newest turtle, who was named Skyscraper because of thick, steely patches on his shell which resembled buildings. “Some researchers suggest the oldest terrestrial tortoise lived to be around 255-years-old, based on historical accounts. Now, sea turtles on the other hand, like my guy Skyscraper here, usually live until eighty-years-old. Not too shabby.”

  “Wow. I’ve outlived many a sea turtle then,” inserted Richard. “What’s the oldest animal ever found? Do you know?”

  Joel nodded, shifting on his feet. He loved answering questions for guests. Alex stood off to the side, but he seemed fascinated by Joel’s spiel, too. “The oldest animal ever found was actually a clam.”

  The group burst out laughing.

  “A clam?” Alex asked, incredulous.

  “Yes. It was named Ming, after the ancient dynasty in China, and using annual growth bands on the shell of this ocean quahog, as it is sometimes referred to, researchers accurately gave Ming’s age as 507. And who knows how long it could have lived if it hadn’t been killed when it was dredged up.”

  “Wow. That’s older than the United States by a long shot, as a nation, I mean,” Esther said, shocked. “Wow, Richard, give him a tip. That was amazing, young man. Did you forget, Richard, that we are supposed to be in Brunswick by four o’clock?”

  “That sea turtle is mighty pretty,” Richard said, before pulling out a few dollars as a tip. He shook hands with Joel. “You, sir, are a bright young man. Thank you for entertaining my friends and me. It was a pleasure.”

  “Thanks,” Joel said, pocketing the cash. His smile disappeared as Alex approached closer. Then he started laughing. “What?”

  “You’re such a nerd. You act so cool, and you are cool, don’t get me wrong. You get every girl you want, and you’re like the epitome of church boy who can somehow sneak out and do whatever he wants. Yet deep down, the real you is a guy who enjoys trivia about clams. Wow, Joel.” Joel wasn’t sure how to take Alex, until a genuine smile touched his lips.

  “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you.”

  “I think this whole quahog, or whatever you called it, conversation has made up for it. I just have to be honest. I felt slighted, but it’s going to be okay. I’m going to be a dad. Wow.”

  “You need to be tested, Alex. What if it’s not your baby?”

  “John was in the slammer for the first time six months ago, just for a few weeks. When he got bailed out, he took off for Florida to resupply, and he was gone for nearly two weeks after that. We had sex a few times during this time period. It was stupid, idiotic, but it makes sense.”

  “She wasn’t on the pill? And you…”

  Alex lifted a hand. “It’s a fluke, but it’s my fluke, and I want to be in my baby’s life. Karli and I won’t be together, but I want to be there for my child.”

  “That’s respectable.” Joel took hold of his nearby mop and began rubbing the floors down again. Even in the hubbub of a Monday afternoon, he always liked to neaten things up. Plus, it was nearing one o’clock, which signified a certain dull period as people ate in the Crab Shack restaurant in the lobby.

  “And I want to be a good father. I’m twenty-years-old, and that barely classifies as mature, but you know, I can try.”

  “You’re doing the right thing, Alex. Trust me, it’s the right thing.”

  “I hope.”

  “For once, let me just tell you, I can’t verify how old a certain sea turtle is, but I can verify that you are making the right choice, Alex McFarland.”

  “If you say so.”