The canister was covered with construction paper asking for donations to help with his physical therapy and explaining that he used to be a senior at this school, that he used to be a basketball star, and that he used to be able to walk…. The same life he never got the chance to live before a car accident changed his world forever. The plastic cover had a slit cut out of the top so you could drop money into it, long enough for coins and wide enough for folded up dollar bills.
I couldn’t do this.
I didn’t want to do this.
I felt my breakfast lurch in my very upset stomach. I lunged for the office door knowing even a second more spent trapped in the same room as that canister was going to send me into another breakdown.
Only this time there would be serious consequences to pay.
I threw the door open without seeing. I mean literally I couldn’t see anything. My mind had slipped into the horrific memories of the past and I was pretty sure I could make a solid plea for temporary insanity at this point.
So when I shoved the door with as much force as I was capable of and met shouting resistance and then found myself tripping, toppling over something on the floor, I was completely taken off guard. The situation was made worse when in the middle of my fall I was drenched with severely hot liquid and landed painfully on my back, soaking wet.
I lay there for several moments sprawled out awkwardly on the hard tile before the clearest, deepest gray eyes I had ever seen hovered over me. His thick brow line and hard edges to his tanned face prove he was male, definitely male. Our gazes locked together and I felt uncomfortably immobilized as the liquid I could now identify as coffee started to cool on my shirt and against my skin.
And then those eyes narrowed on me. My eyes flickered to a face that was completely unreadable, in that I couldn’t identify his expression except that it wasn’t good. Like…. he was mad at me. Like, he was pissed at me.
“Let me up,” I growled, confused by his less than stellar reaction.
“Excuse me?” he asked politely, schooling his expression and realistically sounding polite, like he hadn’t heard me correctly.
“Let me up,” I slowed my speech down, thinking he just hadn’t heard me, probably because he was so disconcerted from staring into my eyes.
I’m not being stuck up here. That’s just usually what happened. I was speaking from experience.
“No problem.” He scooted back from me and I scrambled to my feet. He joined me seconds later with two empty coffee cups in his hand.
We both side stepped the spilled coffee puddled in the hallway and I thought for a second that I heard him huff an impatient sigh, but I knew that had to be wrong.
The halls were empty now, and we were left to stare each other down in front of the office. I prayed Mrs. Tanner had gone back to hiding in her hole of a break room; otherwise I needed to be concerned with her swooping down at any moment to haul my ass to the principal’s office. If I was lucky she would demand a detention, but more than likely she would be petitioning for a suspension. She would use this or any other thing she could find against me.
Like I assaulted gray eyes with his hot coffee in an attempt to end any promising future he might have. Like this would be related in some way to Sam.
Realizing that could be the case, I looked down at my shirt hoping to have evidence that I was actually the one assaulted. And then hope turned to irritation when I noticed that it was completely ruined, and uncomfortably sticky and cold. Not that it was a designer shirt…. but the tight fitting, scoop neck black long-sleeved tee looked great with my gray bubble skirt and knee high charcoal boots. And the only extra piece of clothing I even had with me was my favorite hoodie that I wasn’t supposed to wear.
“What am I going to do now?” I bit out, while mystery man watched me from a few feet away.
“Excuse me?” he asked politely again, only this time I heard the faint tones of aggression and confusion.
Not possible.
“You spilled coffee all over me; I don’t have a change of clothes, what am I supposed to do for the rest of the day?” I asked not at all politely.
“I spilled coffee on you?” he asked slowly, his patience growing thin.
I stopped then, in that moment and lifted my eyes to meet his again. He wasn’t looking at me though, his arms were crossed and he was looking around the hallway as if he couldn’t actually believe what was happening and he needed someone else to clue him in. I took his distracted second to look him over.
He was all bad boy with thick layered dark brown hair that was clearly not styled and left messy and sexy from sleep. He had the thick kind of eye lashes that made most girls go crazy, with tanned skin completely in contrast to his silver gray eyes. His gray t-shirt that was just a little too tight, stretched over his biceps deliciously. His low slung jeans completed what might as well have been the uniform for all things wicked.
“Are you seriously going to blame me?” he asked in disbelief, drawing my attention away from the hollow of his throat.
“You spilled coffee on me,” I pointed out, pulling my shirt away from my skin mostly because it was so uncomfortable but also and a bit calculatingly because I knew it would expose my stomach and I was dying to see his reaction to a little skin.
“You came flying out of the office like a bat out of hell and ran into me,” he laughed unbelievably. And not once did his eyes fall to my exposed skin.
“Listen, I don’t have time for this, I’m already late for class,” I ignored his potentially valid point and waited for the part where he would shake off his disbelief and ask for my number.
“You’re seriously unbelievable,” he continued to sound irritated with me and honestly it was a little disconcerting.
“Me?” I gasped. “You’re unbelievable!”
Only I really meant that. Something was wrong. Like maybe I was broken.
Maybe I was broken….?
I had to test this theory, which meant swallowing all of my pride. My entire life thus far had conditioned me to think that nothing was ever my fault and there was always someone else to blame. Usually a man. An apology would take some effort on my part.
“You are one snide little-“
“Wait a second, before you start calling names,” I interrupted him, holding my hand up before he could get any naughty words out of that beautiful mouth of his. “You caught me way off guard. I may have been a little defensive,” I relented, not feeling a single word I was saying, but knowing if I wanted to get to the bottom of this I would have to play his game.
“You are apologizing for being defensive?” he clarified, not looking at all pacified.
What the hell?
“Yes, um, that and for running into you,” I mumbled in a rush.
“What was that?” he stepped forward, tightening the arms that were folded across his chest. I knew he heard me…. cocky bastard.
“I apologize for running into you, I was in a hurry,” I offered magnanimously.
“Obviously,” he narrowed his eyes on me again and rocked back on his heels. “It’s fine, I mean, you took most of the hit anyway.” He nodded to my stained shirt and that’s when I realized he was completely dry except for the hem of his t-shirt.
I hesitated for a long moment, feeling irrationally vulnerable under his scrutiny. Which wasn’t fair, because I was usually the one getting to do the scrutinizing. He looked me over for all of three more seconds before seeming to come to an indifferent conclusion.
Which, let’s be honest, confused the hell out of me.
“I can write you a pass,” he offered out of the blue. This was it! This was him showing his true colors! But his tone of voice was not anything like the doting, fawning boys I was used to.
“You can?” I squeaked while still feeling exposed for some strange reason.
“I’m the office aide this hour, which is why I had coffee in the first place,” he motioned to the still wet ground.
“Oh.”
�
�What’s your name?” he asked as if he didn’t know.
“Really?” I laughed.
His expression turned confused. “I can’t write you a pass without it.”
“Oh.” I couldn’t tell if he really didn’t know my name or not. He looked confused, but really I was the one that was so confused I couldn’t even make a sentence.
“Uh, your name?” he asked impatiently.
“Ivy Pierce,” I struggled for confidence. Who was this guy?
“Come on Ivy, what class are you going to?” He motioned toward the office, but there was absolutely no way I was going back in there. Not to mention, the minute Mrs. Tanner figured out he was trying to help me out, she wouldn’t let him go through with it. And for some unexplainable reason I didn’t want to get in it with her in front of him.
Whoever he was.
“Um, I have,” I gave my schedule a quick glance before answering, “Mr. Taylor for creative writing.” He motioned me to follow him so I had to call after him before the door swung shut, “I’ll just wait out here.”
He nodded his head without turning around to acknowledge me. Huh. He jumped up, so he could reach over the chest high partition and grabbed the yellow late slips before settling back down to the floor and filling it out. I watched him through the glass in kind of a state of disbelief. He hadn’t looked back at me, not even once.
Obviously my self-confidence was used to more petting, but I had legitimate reasons to have always thought of myself as desired. I was desired- always. And it wasn’t something I liked or ever hardly tolerated, but still it was the truth. The male species as a whole couldn’t resist me and suddenly I smashed into someone I didn’t know, get splattered with hot coffee and my mojo was gone?
“Ivy Pierce?” a girl’s voice made me turn my head away from watching the mysterious office aide.
I turned to meet Kenna Lee as she approached the office. I forced a smile that I didn’t really mean and realized how hard it was to keep my focus on her. She was nice enough, or as nice as a girl could be around me and we had known each forever, but as far as friends went…. she didn’t like me. At all.
And I didn’t blame her.
Plus it was hard to keep my eyes off the office aide writing me a pass. What if he turned to check me out and I missed it? Or even better, what if he never turned to check me out?
Kenna’s smile seemed halfway genuine though so I had to wonder if girls would also be affected by my loss of mojo. Maybe I would start making friends.
“When did you get back?” she asked. She was one of the more attractive girls in our junior class. Her dad was Japanese and her mom was Italian American so she had the good fortune of beautifully mixed genes with long, silky straight black hair, and pretty tilted eyes that were a shocking shade of green.
“Today is my first day,” I answered, wondering what to make of her friendliness.
“Good luck,” she smiled knowingly, but friendly enough.
“Uh, thanks,” I mumbled while she left me in the hallway and entered the office.
Office Boy turned at the sound of the door bells tinkling and his gray eyes lit up as soon as they landed on Kenna. He stopped writing my pass to pull her into his arms and smother her in a kiss. She threw her head back in laughter and he went for her neck playfully.
It was kind of gross, in that sickeningly gross happy couple way that makes everyone around want to vomit. Really blissful couples always made me uncomfortable anyway and I felt the need to avert my eyes.
The office door opened again and a tan, long-fingered hand was thrust through the space. I followed the sinewy muscles up to a perfectly toned bicep along his shoulder, collar bone, throat and up to those clear gunmetal eyes staring at me with nothing more than complete disinterest.
“Sorry again about the coffee,” I apologized more sincerely for that spill than I had anything else in my entire life.
Ok. Almost anything else.
With one giant exception.
“No worries,” he replied without even a smile before the door was shut on me and he, whoever he was, went back to flirting with Kenna in the office.
That was honestly a first for me.
Chapter Three
After a mind numbing morning, I needed a break from the world of academia but could truthfully say I was not looking forward to lunch. Seriously, there was nothing more intimidating for a teenager than starting school well after everyone else and facing the death chamber known as the lunch room.
And I was not even thinking about the food.
I was pretty sure I would have preferred lethal injection.
Or at least the lame therapy center my mom sent me to for recovery. Nobody judged you there at lunch. In fact, lunch usually came in the form of an assortment of rainbow colored pills in Dixie cups.
Mmmm. Delicious.
I had no friends at my school- none. Exie and Sloane, the only people in my life I could use that term even loosely with, went to private school. Why? Because their moms loved them. Well, maybe love was too strong of a word, but they cared more about their reputation than life experience, unlike my mom.
I had nobody here. I mean there were guys I had dated, or used or whatever. But girls in general hated me and I usually tried to avoid all past relationships. Using ex-boyfriends for friendship instead of making out usually tended to confuse most guys and I didn’t have the patience to deal with that.
But I hated feeling intimidated and I hated it even more when I wasn’t brave enough to face my fears. So I took a deep breath and stepped into the stale smelling cafeteria and hoped for the best.
The best being me making it to the end of the period alive.
And with no more food spills or stains on my now pathetic outfit.
I got in line immediately so I could scope out the room under the pretense of boredom and started filling up my tray with various healthy options, like an apple and bottled water. Lunch could not get more exciting than that….
“Hey,” Chase came up behind me, startling me a bit.
“Hey,” I offered back and then resettled the bottle of water I had tipped over in my jumpiness. “So, that’s cool, we have lunch together.”
“Looks like it,” he smiled, his eyes twinkling with interest.
Ok… so my mojo still worked with him? I didn’t get it.
What was going on with the mystery-coffee-spilling office attendant then?
“Where are you sitting?” I paid for my meager lunch, hating that I couldn’t stop eyeing the cheese fries. I mean they were products of a high school cafeteria; they were going to be awful. Still… they didn’t look awful, they didn’t smell awful and they’re nearly neon yellow processed cheese topping practically had my mouth drooling.
“Is that all you’re getting?” Chase looked down at my mostly empty tray.
“Uh, no?” I gave into the cravings that were haunting me and grabbed a granola bar without paying for it as I followed him through the lunchroom. It wasn’t cheese fries, but I hoped it would at least tide me over until dinner. It would be just me and my mom tonight so I had a super yummy bare as could be salad to look forward to.
Yum. Lettuce.
A fresh wave of utter hatred for my life washed over me.
And in a new form of self-loathing masochism I gave one last longing glance back at the cheese fries.
“I’m over here,” Chase called, pulling my attention from the greasy, fattening food I wasn’t allowed within smelling distance of.
Exie and Sloane were so much better at not missing junk food than me. But ever since I hit puberty and had to give up virtually anything that couldn’t be bought in a hundred calorie snack pack, I decided my very first purchase with my trust fund would be a candy bar. Ok, probably it would be a plane ticket, but then definitely a candy bar.
Maybe two.
I was awesome at dreaming big.
I followed Chase to his table, nearly groaning at how many girls were sitting near or around him. This was goi
ng to be an interesting lunch.
We wedged in between two of his friends. I knew they were friends because of the guy fist pump thing they did when we approached and how they scooted out of his way so we could sit down on the narrow bench seat.
“Ivy Pierce?” The guy sitting next to me asked all surprised and shocked.
“Yep,” I nodded, peeling open the wrapper of my granola bar. I realized then that if the entire table kept staring at me like that I wasn’t going to be able to eat any of my lunch. Damn it.
“I didn’t think you were coming back, like ever,” he so eloquently explained his disbelief.
“Well, I’m here,” I clarified shyly.
I was not shy. Actually the farthest thing from shy, but along with the feral attraction the boys at this table were watching me with was a mixture of astonishment and confusion. It was super distressing and I kind of just wanted to find a quiet place and die.
That wasn’t too much to ask for was it?
“So they wouldn’t let you transfer to another district?” A snotty girl from across the table asked innocently. I knew boys, but I knew mean girls better and this girl had an agenda. Her overly big brown eyes watched me with excited anticipation and I could almost feel her punch line hanging in the air.
I just shook my head.
“Oh, they didn’t want you either, then,” she sighed with mock sympathy. The girls around her tittered away their approval of her joke and I shrunk into Chase, using him as a shield against the open hostility.
Last year I would have snapped back with something that was both witty and cruel. I would have easily put her in her place by simultaneously hacking away at whatever façade of self-esteem she had and planted seeds of doubt that would plague her for years to come. I would have shut off every emotion and trickle of potential guilt and acted in the way I was raised to. I would have made my mother proud.
But since nowadays I could barely look at myself in a mirror, I had nothing for Amber. I couldn’t even level her with one of my death glares. She was right after all; no other district would let me transfer into their school. Not even my mom’s own power of persuasion could get me in. I mean, that was a lot of fear and rejection.
The Rush (The Siren Series) Page 2
