His chest suddenly aching, Bellamy turned to face her. "I think that for that to happen," he said, "you'd have to die."
"No problem," she said. "I'll bet the Seven know how to kill me in a way that'll guarantee that I become a wraith."
"Even if that's true, I don't want you to lose your life. Life is precious. Most of the Restless would give everything they have for another shot at it."
"Then becoming a Deathlord is your way of dumping me?" she demanded. "Of running away from the whole Earth, just to make sure I can never, ever see you again?"
"I hoped we could work things out and be together. You'll never know how much. But I see now that it's impossible. The Restless and the Quick are allowed to keep on loving each other, but they're supposed to let go of one another, too. If I keep dragging you into my world, if I keep reaching out to you, death is going to reach out for you, also. Look how many timej you've nearly died already."
"I'm willing to risk it!" she snarled. "Your world is the only one I ever cared about!"
"I wish you'd take another crack at finding the beauty in normal life. It is there, and you don't have to fight off doomshades, werewolves, your shadowself, and the Lord only knows what else to enjoy it. But I guess that's up to me."
"You son of a bitch, don't do this to me! Don't make my decisions tor me! Don't treat me like a child!"
"I love you. Good-bye." He allowed death to whisk him back into the Shadowlands, then gave Titus a commanding stare. Grimacing, the shaman reluctantly removed his hand from Astarte's shoulder. She peered frantically about, looking for all the wraiths who had abruptly vanished from her sighttfiVE
Marilyn awoke to throbbing pains up and down her body. She groaned, and Astarte lurched up from her chair in the corner. Even in the darkened room, the Arcanist could see that her companion's face was still a mess, with dried streaks of her awful black mascara running down her cheeks.
"Are you all right?" Astarte asked. "Should I ring for the nurse? I don't think it's time for another pain shot."
"Don't be silly," said Marilyn. "What would be the point of a rich person checking into a private hospital if she couldn't get all the narcotics she wanted? By all means, call her. In a moment. I'm glad you finally stopped crying."
"Yeah, finally. When I fell asleep. I've never been like this before, except for when we saw the cops carry his body out of the cemetery on TV. I feel like such a wuss."
Marilyn reached out and took her hand. Weak as she was, it took a surprising amount of effort.
"I wish I could at least remember everything that happened," the girl in black continued fretfully. "I know the Deathlords appeared and made Valentine a Governor. I know Frank decided a ghost and a live person shouldn't be together, and said he was going far, far away. But there was more, and if I remembered what, I'd know where he's going."
"I think the Deathlords cast a spell to jumble everyone's memory," Marilyn replied. "I feel as if I should be able to figure out why,, but somehow, I quite can't put the pieces together either. I imagine that that's a part of the magick as well."
"God damn him!" Astarte exploded. "He treated me like dirt! Why do I even care about him anymore?"
Marilyn sighed. "One of the eternal questions. Love's just like that, I suppose, like a scab you can't stop picking at. Have you thought about what you want to do now that our little adventure is over? Are you going to. take Frank's advice and try to discover the simple joys of mundane existence?"
The girl with the piercings glared at her. "Get teal. I was born to be a part .of the supernatural; for. a while I was; and one way or another, I'm going to be again. It isn't all seme horrible forbidden thing that no one should ever see, no matter what that asshole thinks. It's strange and dangerous, but if you have the guts to explore it, you can find wonderful things."
"That's what I've always believed," Marilyn said.
The girl in black hesitated. "I know that from here on out, you're going: to spend your time studying to. be a better mage. Do you think maybe I could stay with you? Be your apprentice or whatever? Maybe I can learn to cast spells, too. Even if I don't, at least I'll be where I want to be."
The Arcanlst smiled. "I'd like that."
Astarte grinned. "And maybe we can get our memories unscrambled. Maybe I can find Frank again, and figure out the way for us to be together. Right after I kick his ass for ditching me!" Fresh tears sliding down her face, she squeezed Marilyn's hand in both of hers.
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