by Emma Renshaw
I could only hope they were on a plane for Austin right now and tomorrow they would be here as we said our final goodbye to Georgia.
2
Ridge
“They’ll be here any minute,” Makenna called.
I leaned against the wall, taking a sip of my beer. It was as good a position as any from which to surprise Gunner and Delilah when they walked in. It was opening day for Gunner, and he planned to propose after the game. I didn’t know how Delilah hadn’t figured it out. Everyone around her had known the plan for weeks.
Delilah, Gunner, and Tuck had fit together like a family from the beginning. I hadn’t known him long, but I’d known Delilah since she’d moved to town and met Makenna. It was like Gunner was a missing puzzle piece, and as soon as they found each other, that was it. They were done. Ready-made family. Just add water.
I’d never had anything like that. My family wasn’t worth much. And after my parents had checked out mentally and physically, the foster families hadn’t been much better. The only blood relative that mattered had moved on to a better life than any I could’ve given her, and the only family I’d found since then were my brothers and sisters at the fire station.
Foster took up the space next to me. He’d become my best friend over the years, and he was the only person in town who knew any of shit I’d come from. He didn’t know it all though. He was the opposite of me. Everyone knew where he came from and still gossiped about his family. He didn’t let that shit affect him though. He’d made his decisions and stuck by them.
I’d made one decision in my life that I’d stuck by—to become a firefighter. I’d decided that at a young age and never looked back.
“They’re walking in,” Makenna whisper shouted. The door opened and a grinning Gunner, surprised Delilah, and frantic Tuck entered.
“Surprise,” everyone shouted. Delilah faced Gunner, talking to him and smiling; then they were kissing. Tuck covered his eyes and groaned. Foster laughed and shook his head as Makenna broke up the happy couple. After a quick greeting, I stepped back, letting the rest of the party at them, and grabbed two beers from the ice.
Gunner came up with a sappy grin on his face. “Great game today,” I said and handed him a beer. He nodded. I was about to ask him about the tickets he’d gotten for the group for an upcoming game when Foster’s eyes widened and his jaw dropped, distracting me. “Woah,” he said. I followed his gaze and froze. Every nerve ending was flaring to life, setting off the others like a pinball machine.
The commotion of the party died down around me as all my senses honed in on her. I hadn’t seen her in almost eleven years. I’d imagined her often, I’d wondered what had happened to her, and she’d even starred in some of my fantasies.
She was even more magnificent than I remembered. Dark jeans hugged her hips, ass, and thighs. I couldn’t look away as she swung her hips side to side—up to the counter—leaned over, and spoke with the cashier. I stared at her back, from the ends of her vibrant red hair all the way to crown of her head.
“That’s Zoe,” I said. I wasn’t sure if anyone had even asked that question, but I had to say her name aloud. I needed her to turn around so I could catch one glimpse of her green eyes. Just one glimpse. I didn’t even know if she would remember me, if those couple of weeks in the hospital were as seared into her brain as they were into mine.
“She completely disappeared after the fire,” Makenna said. “She changed her number. She and her aunt picked up and moved. I tried to get in touch with her for years, but I never heard from her again.”
Makenna was the one who had directed to me to where Zoe was pinned under a log. They were once best friends. Makenna lost a lot that night. She had trouble looking me in the eyes when we met for the first time after the fire; I was a constant reminder of the horrors she’d experienced. Eventually we became friends.
Delilah called Gunner’s name and he left, going after her. I couldn’t pry my eyes away from Zoe. The cashier handed her a to-go bag of food over the counter, and she walked toward the exit. Before I could analyze what I was doing or think about what I’d say, I squeezed past Makenna and Foster, ignoring them as they called after me. And I chased after Zoe. I was seconds behind her as she went out the door. The streetlights illuminated her red hair as she stood on the quiet street searching through her purse.
“Zoe.”
Her head popped up and she whipped around, placing a hand on her chest. She squinted and stared at me. “Ridge.”
I nodded. We stood on the sidewalk, alone. Main Street was pretty clear at this time of night. The restaurants lining the path were lit up and filled with patrons, but the rest of the businesses had shut down until tomorrow morning.
“You scared me,” she said and took another slow breath.
“I’m sorry. I saw you in there.” I pointed my thumb over my shoulder.
She nodded, curling a piece of hair behind her ear. She looked down at her purse and pulled out her keys. “There they are.”
“It’s Gunner’s engagement party,” I said. I knew she knew him. “Makenna’s inside, too. You should come in. I bet they’d like to see you.”
She licked her lips, taking a step away from me and toward her car. “I’ve really got to run. Maybe some other time.”
I knew she was lying. She was running. Again. She opened the passenger door of a sedan parallel parked on the street, placed the to-go order on the seat, and rounded the hood. She stopped and turned to face me again.
“It was good to see you, Ridge.” She turned and kept walking as I stared after her. She popped open the door.
“Hey, Zoe,” I called.
She looked up, and I couldn’t stop my lips from twitching with a smile I hadn’t felt in some time, wanting to break free. I asked her the question an elementary schooler had asked me during a tour of the firehouse last week. I was still thinking about my answer. “If you could choose between ten million dollars or the knowledge that a specific snail’s sole purpose in life is to kill you, and you’d know which snail—which would you choose?”
She shook her head and started to angle herself into the car, but she paused, gazing straight into my eyes. She smiled. “Easy. I’d choose the money.”
“Even if there was a hit on your life?”
“I’d run every time I saw a snail, they’d never catch me. So no accidental death for me. I’ll take the money every time.”
She got into her car, waving as she pulled away. I watched the taillights fade into the night. And I stood there even after they were gone. I wanted to see her headlights come back, hoping she’d change her mind and return to the party to visit her old friends.
I knew better than to hope she was back in town for good.
3
Zoe
My mom’s phone went straight to voicemail without even a single ring. I wanted to believe it was because it was in airplane mode and they were on the way here, but I feared it was so I wouldn’t annoy them any further.
I sat on the end of the bed, brushing a hand down the skirt of my dress. It had a tight bodice, with a sweetheart neckline reminiscent of decades ago, and stopped just below my knees. The bright peaches stood out against the white background. I traced my finger around a peach and its green leaf.
Georgia had wanted my mom here. Even after all those years and broken promises, she’d thought it was important that this happen with my mom and dad present. I wasn’t sure if it was due to their relationship or if she’d hoped they would become supportive parents in the wake of this tragedy. Maybe she’d thought this would snap them back to a time when they were the ideal parents.
The way I saw it, I had two choices. I could try to give Georgia exactly what she wanted. If I did that, I’d have to put off spreading her ashes while I waited for my parents to contact me. It might mean staying in town a few extra days. Or I could be selfish and ignore them, spread her ashes, say my goodbyes, and get out of town.
I really only had one choice.
> I’d never turn my back on any wish of Georgia’s.
Besides, I glanced at my phone, and my parents were only seventeen minutes late. We’d made these plans weeks ago; maybe they were still attuned to whatever time zone they’d just come from. I blew out a breath, collapsing back on the bed. There was a letter waiting for me and one for my mom, for us to read as we spread the ashes. I was itching to read Georgia’s words. I wanted that letter to contain every piece of wisdom she’d ever offer me. I wanted it to be filled to the brim with memories we’d shared. I wanted it to be so long it would take me the rest of my life to read it, so I would never have to walk a day on this Earth without my aunt.
I popped up when a knock sounded on the door. My heart tripped over itself, and my palms sweated. The little girl in me still wanted to impress the parents that had abandoned her. I shook off my negative feelings, closing my eyes for just a moment, and remembered why I was doing this. I smiled and opened the door, but my smile promptly fell as my jaw dropped.
“You should remember word gets around fast in small towns.”
Makenna didn’t wait for an invitation; she shimmied past me and into my cabin. I didn’t know where to begin or what to say. She’d been my best friend. She was the reason I was alive. She was the only person I’d seen before I left town. I tried to say goodbye without her really knowing where I was going, but she was so lost in her grief I don’t think she heard a word of what I said. The picture that had caused all that grief, the picture that had snapped the branches and made the whole bonfire collapse, was the reason I’d made a promise to never hurt anyone the way my parents had hurt me. I’d done that though. I’d turned my back on Makenna. I didn’t keep that promise for even an hour. Seeing her brought back the guilt and the shame.
Which wasn’t her fault. It was mine. It was mine for not saying goodbye, and it was mine for disappearing.
She whipped around and faced me with her arms crossed over her chest. Her lips were pursed, and her cheeks reddened with the anger I could see brewing in her eyes. She still looked like the same Makenna. Gorgeous, perfectly put together, and wearing her heart on a sleeve. There was a different quality about her now though.
Something I couldn’t quite put my finger on.
“You know I saw you last night. I was at the restaurant.”
I knew that. Ridge had mentioned it. I was still too shocked to say anything.
“You’re going to stand there and say nothing?” Makenna shrieked and dragged a hand through her hair.
“I don’t know what to say.”
“I knew you were in town, at least to stop for food. That restaurant was Georgia’s favorite. I didn’t know if you were just passing through until I came to help Delilah out this morning and happened to see your name in the guestbook.”
“I’m here for a couple of days,” I said. “There’s so much I should say.”
“Yeah,” Makenna said. She looked around, spotting my suitcase in the corner of the room, and took in the dress I was wearing. “What finally brings you back?”
I bit my lip. I wanted to close my eyes to ward off the tears, but I couldn’t do that right now. I powered through the pain that was ricocheting around my chest. “Georgia wanted her ashes to be spread here.”
Makenna deflated. All the anger seeped out of her like air leaving a balloon. “Zoe,” she whispered, looking down at her shoes and shaking her head. When she met my gaze again, there were tears in her eyes and she stepped forward. We hugged each other, and I couldn’t keep my tears at bay anymore.
“I’ve missed you,” I said quietly, and everything I’d been holding inside came rushing out. “I probably don’t have a right to say that, but I have. You’re still my best friend, and I’ve missed you every day. I’m sorry I wasn’t here. I’m so sorry I wasn’t here. You shouldn’t even be nice to me, I was a horrible friend. I left because I couldn’t handle it, when I should’ve stayed because you were in so much pain. I couldn’t see their names or faces. You should be yelling at me, not comforting me.”
“I’m sorry it took me so long to notice you were gone.”
I released her from the hug but held on to her arms, gently shaking them. “No. You…you lost Declan. I’m so sorry I wasn’t here.”
“Where have you been?”
I shrugged. “We bounced around a little bit but settled in Colorado.”
Makenna took her arms from my hands and sat down on the bed, blowing out a breath. “What happened to Georgia?”
I sat next to her, wiping away the mascara from underneath my eyes. “She was diagnosed with ALS about three years ago and passed about a month ago.”
“Oh, God,” Makenna breathed. “Were you with her all that time?”
“I was her caretaker. I’m a geriatric nurse. Helping people like Georgia is my passion though.” I wrapped my arms around myself. I’d been her caretaker for three years, but before that, I’d been working as a nurse in nursing homes. Death wasn’t new to me. Deaths of people close to me weren’t new to me. But this one still felt different. This one still hurt a little worse.
I released a breath and brushed my hands up and down my arms, warding off the chill that came with thinking too closely about the ache in my chest. “How’s the charmed Makenna life?” I joked, aiming to change the subject to something on a lighter note. I knew Makenna had taken her knocks from the fire, but I hoped the rest of her life had been happy.
“Not as shiny as it once was. The charm has worn off.”
I crinkled my eyebrows, an unspoken question in my eyes. “That’ll be for another day. How long are you here?”
“Only a couple of days,” I said. “I’m waiting for my parents, so we can spread Georgia’s ashes.”
Makenna gasped. “Your parents are deigning to set foot in Hawk Valley? I thought your mom’s Louboutins would break if she crossed the town line.”
“I’m sure her stiletto heel will snap once she crosses the county line, long before she even reaches town.” I chuckled. “They’re supposed to, but they’ve been MIA and I can’t get a hold of them. That’s nothing new though.”
“I hope they come.” Makenna patted my thigh.
“Me too.”
“Back to Colorado after?”
“I’m not sure yet. I don’t know if it’ll feel like home without her.”
“You’ll always have a home here with me.”
I laid my head against her shoulder, something I’d done countless times before, but hadn’t in years. It was still second nature, our friendship, as easy as breathing.
“Thanks.”
I couldn’t stay here either. I didn’t think Hawk Valley could ever be home again. I shouldn’t even be welcomed here. I should be banned on sight. If only anyone knew the guilt I carried and the reason why.
4
Ridge
Chief Talbot stood in the open bay with his arms crossed over the wide expanse of his chest. He stood there during shift changes and inspected his firefighters as they strolled into the station. He ran a tight ship. It didn’t matter to him that we were a small station. He expected the best from us and would watch us polish our boots if they got too scuffed up.
I hadn’t shown up at the station in anything other than a smooth polo shirt bearing the department logo and black BDUs since the time I made the mistake of coming in with an untucked wrinkly T-shirt when I was running late. I ironed everyone’s uniform for a month and even ironed Chief’s personal clothes. It wasn’t just the clothes though. I ironed all the sheets for the bunks as well. So I stuck to the standard uniform. Some firehouses allowed T-shirts, but Chief expected us in polos until the Texas heat went above ninety-five degrees. Then and only then were T-shirts allowed as part of the uniform. He still expected a starched look though. But we weren’t there yet. It was early spring. Some days were muggy and warm, but we weren’t even close to Texas summer heat.
He gave me a slight nod as I crossed the large slab of concrete between us. “Sanders.” He lifted hi
s chin to beckon me closer. I hitched my duffle higher on my shoulder and stopped in front of him.
“Sir.”
“We have a new rookie starting today. Somebody needs to be responsible for him, and you’re the lucky winner.”
Lucky winner. Right.
“Yes, sir.”
“Make sure he understands everything I told him in the interview is the truth. This is my house and I run it as I see fit.”
I scratched my cheek to hide my lip twitch. Hank Talbot was a fierce chief who regarded his rules as law. He was a proud man. While he was gruff and strict with his firefighters, he’d sooner sacrifice himself than lose any of us in action. My chest tightened thinking of the firefighter we had lost recently. I refocused on the man in front of me as he scowled and listed his expectations for the rookie.
“Here he is now.”
I looked over my shoulder at the man striding toward us. His gaze was flicking around, taking in everything from the towering flagpole on the roof, with the United States and Texas flags whipping in the wind, to the tall gold letters above the door: HAWK VALLEY FIRE DEPARTMENT AND EMERGENCY SERVICES.
As he inspected the station, I inspected him to see if Talbot would find any issues with him on first sight. He wouldn’t.
“Chief Talbot.”
“Chase Price. This is Ridge Sanders. He’ll be the one to show you around, and you’re his responsibility. He’s a damn good firefighter, and he’ll accept nothing but the same from you. If I don’t see that in you, you’ll have to find another station. I only have the best. Hawk Valley relies on us, and I refuse to disappoint them.”
With those parting words, Chief turned on his heel and stomped through the bay toward the stairs that led to his office. I focused my attention on the new guy in front of me and stuck out my hand.
