“No,” she said fiercely, then picked herself off the ground and walked into the room where Harm was being held in time to hear the man who was her father beg, “Letting her shift is the biggest mistake you could make, other than not killing her.”
And then Stray saw her and muttered, “Shit.”
She might not have shifted yet, but her wolf hearing had obviously kicked in. She’d been three floors down and they’d been behind closed doors.
She took a step forward, even as she heard Rifter’s voice behind her, calling to her, urging her to come to him.
That need was strong, but something pushed her to move toward Harm. She stared at him, processing things—no wonder he’d looked familiar to her before. Her father was the former lead singer of one of the most famous heavy-metal hair bands from the eighties.
And he was also, apparently, a wolf. How all of that worked was beyond her, but now wasn’t the time for a father-daughter chat.
“Gwen,” Rifter started, but she put a hand on his massive chest and pushed him out of the way. She heard a low growl emanate from his throat and was under no illusions that Rifter allowed her to move him.
But she was tired of being coddled. “You’re really my father?”
Harm nodded. “I’m your father, yes.”
Rifter growled again, and the entire tenor of the room changed. Because the man in front of her—his eyes—were different, and when she looked back at Rifter, his looked oddly similar.
They were wolf’s eyes. And she had a strong feeling hers looked similar.
She got closer to Harm. “You want me dead.”
“It’s not that simple, Gwen. There’s so much you don’t know,” he told her, and that was true. Her head began to spin and the familiar symptoms tugged at her.
She held out a hand, and Rifter caught it. “Rifter, it’s happening.”
“Another seizure?” Rifter asked.
“I smell a wolf.” Vice sniffed the air. “A Dire.”
There was dead silence, and it took her a long moment before she realized that it was her shift they scented. She was half blind, like they’d lowered the lights, and she stumbled, hands flat to the wall until she found the door.
Rifter was on her before she could leave the hall, his body pressing hers, hot and familiar. “Am I dying?”
“I won’t let you.”
If only it was that simple.
His voice sounded different—hoarse, huskier, and in the room they’d left came a howl that chilled her to the bone. “You’re going to shift and I’m going to help you.”
“I’m scared. Of the shift… of you…”
“You should never be scared of me,” he told her. “I’d die if you were.”
She wasn’t. She knew on a logical level that she should be, but she put her hands on his shoulders. “Help me.”
From what, she had no idea. All she knew was that the urge to run was overpowering. She needed to do so in the same way she needed air—there was no substitute or compromise. And when she ran, the stairs shifting in front of her like she was on an LSD trip, she heard Rifter behind her, telling her he wouldn’t leave her.
Finally, she was outside. She took a deep breath—smelled fresh grass under the wintery ground and the incoming rain. And Rifter—he was with her. She spun in a circle—Rifter’s wolf eyes glowed.
She was Alice down the rabbit hole and she knew she was dying, right then and there. Or at least a part of her was. Whether she’d be reborn into the wolf depended partly on her will and on a lot of things well out of her control.
As she watched, Rifter shifted impressively. The rustling in her ears got louder, like her wolf was trying to communicate with his.
“Rifter,” she said, and the wolf turned to look at her with Rifter’s eyes, the way they’d looked when he’d kissed her today.
He did love her. It was all that mattered.
She fell to the soft grass on her hands and knees, her skin tight and hot, and how she ached. She heard a growl, could’ve sworn it came from her.
“It’s happening,” she said, and the wolf was nuzzling her.
Your Sister Wolf is coming, the rustling said, and Gwen saw the blackness cover her eyes like a blindfold.
Chapter 38
Nothing happened like it was supposed to. Gwen collapsed, twitched a little, but she remained in human form. Unconscious human form.
Brother Wolf howled and tried to get some kind of response. Still nothing.
Rifter would have to dreamwalk with her, but not out here, with the sky darkening and the thunder rolling in. His skin felt like a thousand pinpricks as electricity crawled the air.
This was unnatural, but that was literally the least of his worries at the moment.
He shifted back to human form, saw Vice and Jinx waiting for them on the back porch. He picked Gwen up as gently as he could—goddamn, she was pale—and moved her indoors.
“Help her, Jinx,” he said as he stood in front of the men he’d lived with like family for three hundred years and saw the same helplessness in their eyes that was no doubt reflected from his.
“Go to her,” Jinx urged, then leaned in and took the dreamcatcher necklace off Rifter’s neck. He’d made Rifter put it on again as soon as they’d finished talking to Gwen the previous night.
“Suppose she comes with me into that nightmare?” Rifter asked over his shoulder as he walked up the stairs to his room. He laid her on the bed, on his pillows, as Jinx took the dream catcher down from the headboard as well.
“Better she’s with you than alone,” Jinx said. “None of us deserves to be alone.”
Liam had watched the Dire wolves handle the outlaw attack with military precision. He’d known Rifter was trying to save the pack on his own, and he knew Rifter’s brothers would never allow Liam to be captured without a fight.
Tonight, he’d repaid them by nearly letting his mate kill Gwen, the woman about to be mated to the Dire king. And as he watched Gwen run—perhaps even partially shifting—he knew that, in order to take control of his pack, all the training in the world wouldn’t help him prove shit unless he confronted the demons he’d refused to face.
He still held Max by the arm in the corner of the garage. Her cheeks were stained with tears although she’d never admit to crying—never cried in front of him, actually.
He’d admired her strength at one time.
“If Teague came here tonight, would you go with him?” Liam demanded of her, and she jerked uncomfortably in his grasp.
“To save you—and the baby. That’s all I wanted to do.”
It still didn’t make her answer go down any easier. Any trust they’d had over the past year crumpled. And here he’d thought he could hang on to something… anything, connected with his past.
It was all future now. And, like Vice said, women would only complicate matters. “Are you sure this baby’s mine?”
Her face lit up with indignation. “Of course.”
But something inside pulled at him hard not to believe her. If the outlaws had been planning their takeover for a while, what better way to infiltrate their newfound enemy than with his own mate?
Had she ever loved him? His anger rose hot and he knew what he needed to do. “So let’s bring you to him right now.”
He unhooked her and recuffed both hands behind her back. Not that he couldn’t handle a human, but if she went at him, he might have a problem controlling her without hurting the baby.
He borrowed one of the trucks in the garage—a Humvee built like a tank and able to withstand the weather outside. The rain hit the windshield in sheets, and it was definitely difficult driving, but he made it across the bridge and past abandoned cars and finally pulled in front of Teague’s house.
“This is a death wish,” Max told him.
“For Teague—not for me.” Liam had trained and sparred with Vice only once, but he’d learned several tricks that were mostly dirty—and effective.
This was war—and while
he could utilize some of the old traditions, Liam was about to institute some new ones. He slammed open the door and pulled Max out with him—called to Teague with a rough howl that made Max wince next to him.
As the rain lashed at him, Teague came out of the house, his eyes already lupine.
Control, Liam, he ordered himself. In a time not too long ago, simply seeing Teague’s anger would’ve brought about his own shift. Now that lack of control shamed him, even though he knew it was simply Were nature.
He would fight that—and continue to—if he was to prove himself a worthy leader.
This was for Linus, his father—for their entire pack and its future. “You’ve betrayed me and the pack—I can’t let you live,” he told Teague.
“Young wolf, don’t you understand? You can’t survive this,” Teague called back, his canines long, cutting his lip as he spoke.
Without warning, Liam pulled Max in front of him and held his knife to her belly. It was silver and it burned the shit out of his hand, but it would hurt her a whole lot worse.
Teague stopped cold. Max was frozen in his arms, and he waited and watched. “Come closer and I’ll do it.”
“Don’t,” Teague managed.
“What do you care if I kill my mate and my child?” he asked, because he already had his answer.
This baby wasn’t his.
“Get back in the goddamned truck and don’t make a move,” he warned Max. “Not if you give a shit about that baby.”
She moved fast as soon as he let her go, scrambled into the truck as he went forward to Teague. The man was no longer standing stock-still, but the initial shock gave Liam an edge.
Still, he threw the knife to the ground. This would be a fair fight—and a fair kill—just as tradition called for.
The men caught each other by the arms, turned in a circle as humans under the sky, which was as deceptive as Teague himself. A man he’d never called friend, but one he could’ve easily called brother.
To ask why—from either of them—would be futile.
The shift occurred for both men almost immediately after they completed the first circle. Liam wasted no time in going for Teague’s throat. As a younger and slightly smaller wolf, Liam didn’t have the advantage. But with the anger pounding through his body, he didn’t need size or training.
This was avenging his father, and he tore Teague’s throat out and then ripped his body apart, piece by piece, under the thunderous sky.
He killed Teague but couldn’t bring himself to do the same to Max… not yet, anyway. He’d already taken enough from her child as it was. And when he got back in the truck, leaving Teague’s disrespected body out to be discovered by the other outlaws, he was soaked and bloody and barely able to stop himself from trembling.
But he did.
Max’s sobs were muffled by her fist pressed to her mouth. He didn’t look at her on the drive back through the rain—the truck barely making it over the bridge, water lapping at the tires.
When he pulled back into the safety of the Dire garage, Max was still crying softly. He’d need to have Gwen or Jinx check her out to make sure the shock wasn’t doing anything harmful to the baby, even though he cursed himself for caring.
“You knew,” he said quietly. “Knew the baby wasn’t mine the entire time.”
“You knew what I was from the start.”
He had. “Loyalty was never your strong suit—you just pretended it was.”
“That’s not true—I needed to go with who I thought was the toughest—the unbeatable one. I didn’t want to end up on what I thought would be the losing side ever again,” she told him. “I’m farther along than I told you. You were away with Linus on pack business when it happened.”
There was nothing more to say—they’d both been very wrong. And so he walked her inside, put her back into the locked room and went to find Vice.
He’d opened up a shit storm of trouble for himself and the Dires, and he was prepared to deal with the fallout.
Instead of Vice, he found Jinx, pacing anxiously in front of the fire. “Hey, where’d you go?”
Liam told him, keeping his voice from shaking—anger and pain were harder to keep out than he’d thought—and Jinx stared at him for a long moment. “Vice’ll be proud as hell.”
“The outlaws are going to come here looking for me,” he said.
“Let them.” Jinx’s voice was firm, fierce and unwavering. “You’re going to need to start assessing pack loyalty. And I know two young wolves who wouldn’t mind being a part of your pack, if you’ll have them.”
“Cyd and Cain?” he asked, and Jinx nodded. “I couldn’t think of two better right-hand men.”
“Good.”
But there were far more problems to be solved. “What do I do with this baby?”
Jinx didn’t give him an easy answer. “Technically, she’s part of your pack, so you do what your traditions tell you to. It’s the best way to maintain control and your status as a leader.”
Death to the mother; send the child away. Banished to a rogue life… no doubt he’d be dead before his conversion. A leader would make the hard decisions, do what needed to be done for tradition and pack pride.
If he couldn’t… he would have to walk away from his pack altogether. There was no other choice for him.
“I’ll grab you something to eat,” Jinx told him.
“Not hungry.”
“You’ll eat anyway,” Jinx said before disappearing. For a long while, Liam stared at the floor contemplating his past, present and future. When he looked up, Cain was in front of him, holding a plate with several large sandwiches.
His stomach growled in spite of everything. He ate quickly, thanked Cain.
“You’ve had a rough night.”
“I’ve lost everything.”
“You have your pack,” Cain pointed out. “You have me and Cyd. Don’t fuck up your opportunity because of a human and her frailties.”
Chapter 39
Waking up would require work—Gwen’s limbs were heavy, even while her head felt floaty and dizzy.
The rustling in her ears was incessant—she wanted to cover them and scream, but knew it wouldn’t block anything.
She would have to accept the pain and let it in. She groped in the dark until she heard a familiar voice and turned toward it. “Rifter?”
“I’m here, baby girl.”
Her body felt like she’d been beaten and lost the fight. “I thought I shifted.”
“You didn’t. You’re… caught in the shift,” he explained.
“That can’t be good.” She focused enough to see Rifter’s face next to her. “Am I awake?”
He shook his head no and held her hand in his. “I won’t leave until you are.” He was her beacon, would make everything worth it. She focused on that. “Put your hands on me.”
He did—his touch hot, electric. “More,” she moaned, and then wondered if it was a good sign that she wanted him so badly, despite the pain.
His hands roamed under her shirt, along her rib cage, and then they covered her breasts as his mouth did the same to hers.
She couldn’t resist him any more than she could breathing. His mouth took hers in a way that discouraged any thought of resistance—she was wet between her legs, needed the weight of his body on hers immediately, here and now.
It appeared Rifter felt the same, since she found herself wrapped around him.
“Claim me,” she heard herself murmur, and he did, with his hand. She wanted more, but he stopped her when her hands found his arousal.
“Gwen, we can’t—gotta get you out of the shift first.”
She acquiesced, only because his fingers drew her so close to orgasm she could do nothing but lie there and accept it. Reveled in it, as her hips drew up to meet his strokes, his lips dragged kisses along her neck and breasts, soothing the imaginary wounds and making her forget her troubles.
His fingers took her, moved rhythmically, his thumb circling her clit
. Why was this so easy with him? There was no worry or embarrassment, only a longing for him greater than she’d ever known.
“More,” she told him. And he gave it to her, brought her to a first and then second orgasm in quick succession while his tongue played on her nipple and her body soared with pleasure.
If she wasn’t already unconscious, she would’ve sworn she passed out. But when she opened her eyes, everything was covered in that thin, gauzy film, the way it had been at the party. This wasn’t the first time Rifter had walked inside her dreams, but now that she knew what was happening, she was definitely not comfortable with it.
Knowing she was stuck between worlds this time definitely added to her fear.
After her heartbeat returned to normal, she looked around. They were in Rifter’s bed, not outside, which was the last place she remembered being. “I’m sorry… I tried to hold it off, but I got so mad—at Max and then at Harm.”
Rifter stretched, his massive chest rippling when he shrugged. “That’ll do it, especially when your wolf is young and uncontrolled.”
Your wolf… “Does Harm hate me?”
“No. He doesn’t want you to be immortal, to have to deal with what we’ve had to.”
“His life doesn’t seem so bad,” she muttered.
“He’s alone, Gwen. We all are—and I was.” He paused. “Our mating gives them a hope they don’t want. Because this might all be an aberration, a once in a lifetime. We were prepared to never have mates. So my brothers are pulling for us as hard as we are… and I hope the Elders let them experience what I am.”
She let that soak in for a long moment. Stroked his hair, touched his lips with her fingers. And then realized that, if Rifter was in her dream with her, the way he’d been the first night they met, something could possibly be wrong.
“Rifter, did I… I mean, I felt like something was happening to me. But did I actually… you know…”
“Shift?” He took her hand and held it. “No, you didn’t. I think you’re trying, but it hasn’t happened yet. You’re in human form still.”
“And asleep?”
“Unconscious.”
Damn it. “What can I do?”
Dire Needs: A Novel of the Eternal Wolf Clan Page 25
