by SL Schiefer
Raven is sitting in a chair I had hauled up here for her, with Jazz sticking close to her side and Creep close to hers. Prospects and brothers are milling around, having a Scotch in my dad’s honor.
My eyes always come back to Raven’s. That girl knocked me on my ass the first time I met her, and nothing has changed since. She’s the only woman who has ever dared challenge me and pushes my buttons on a regular basis. She’s the only woman who will ever have my heart.
My fingers roll around in my pocket and feel for the diamond ring I’ve been carrying around. When I finally gave in and started pursuing her, I started glancing at rings whenever I was somewhere that had them.
I finally went into a small, mom and pop jewelry store and had one designed. It has a one carat princess cut diamond with smaller diamonds all the way around it and diamonds down the band. When I went and picked it up, I knew it was perfect.
I know marrying her will be one of the best things I do. The only thing that will top this is having kids with her.
Smiling, I start walking through the overgrown grass and make it back to her side. I reach my hand out and place it around her shoulders, giving her a light squeeze. She turns and smiles at me.
“Angel, are you ready to get out of here?” I ask, really hoping she says yes. I didn’t plan on asking her today, but I think I need to make this day good. There’s been so much dark shit, I need my light.
“Sure, we taking the bike?” she questions, slowly standing up from her chair.
“We can. Are you up for the ride?” My hand follows her spine as I lower it to the small of her back.
“Sure, I know you won’t let anything happen to me.”
After saying our goodbyes to everyone still hanging around, we finally find ourselves on my bike. Trying not to give anything away, I just start riding around town.
When we finally made it back to our home, but I ended up not asking her because she distracted me with her mouth and gave me the best blowjob I’ve ever had. And being considerate of the taking it easy instructions from the doctor, I got her off with just my tongue.
***
A couple days later, we’re back at my house, just relaxing. With all of her stuff finally moved in, it feels like home. I never realized how empty this place was before Raven was here. It’s still got a lot of empty room, but that just means more kids for us to have.
“What are you thinking about so hard over there?” We’re lying on the bed, where we always seem to end up because it’s the most comfortable for us.
I’m lying on my back and have one arm under her neck while she’s curled into me as much as she can. I’m absently stroking her hair with the hand that’s under her. “I wasn’t thinking about anything,” I lie. Almost feeling bad for lying to her, but not wanting to open that can of worms just yet.
“Mmhmmm. You’re a terrible liar sometimes,” she chuckles.
“Well, as long as it’s only sometimes then that’s good,” I say to her, joking.
A bark of laughter escapes her lips, which immediately makes me laugh, too. “Angel, do you know how much I love you?” I guess it’s now or never.
“Of course, I love you just as much.” She keeps her eyes on the TV still, trying to keep up with whatever is happening on there.
“I would do anything for you, including taking a bullet, but I really hope that doesn’t have to happen again. That shit hurts. I’m not going to lie.”
She smiles against my chest. “I really hope it doesn’t come to that. Although, if you get shot again, you’re leaving the club. I’m not going to be able to handle you being out there with the possibility you may not come home.”
Nodding, I tell her, “I know, Angel. I’ll do everything in my power to come home to you. Every. Single. Night.”
Reaching into the pocket of my jeans, I grab the ring I’ve had in there for the past week. Pulling it out, I hold it in my hand for a second, steeling myself to ask the most important question I’ll ever ask. Setting the ring on top of her breasts, I roll so I’m facing her more fully.
“Angel, I’ll never want another woman. You’re all I ever think about. I want to make you mine permanently. Marry me?”
“Is that supposed to be a question or a demand?”
“It’s a bit of both. Now, if you don’t mind…” I grab the ring and reach for her other hand, sliding the ring onto her finger. Knowing what her answer is going to be, I don’t have to wait for possible rejection.
“Yes, you know I’ll marry you.”
Leaning forward, I press my lips against hers, savoring the feel of her soft lips against mine.
***
Four Months Later
I’ve been dragged to the doctor’s office, more specifically an OBGYN. I’ve decided I really fucking hate the doctor she has picked out. I try to keep in mind he’s only doing his job, but I fucking hate it.
Today, we’re seeing the ultrasound technician. Today, we find out the sex of our baby. To say I’m nervous is an understatement. I’ve been ready for this appointment since about two weeks after I found out she was pregnant.
The inside of the ultrasound room is dark, with a big wheeled machine that I’m assuming is what we’re going to be looking at. Raven climbs up onto the bed, undoes the button to her jeans, and rolls them down.
Once the technician is inside, she introduces herself to me and then explains what she’ll be doing today. “Hey, guys, I’m Tasha. Obviously, you’re here for your five month ultrasound. We’ll be checking the size of the baby, heart, and the sex. Do you want to know what you’re having?”
We both nod our heads vigorously. Tasha then squirts some jelly onto Raven’s belly. I reach out and grab onto her hand closest to me, needing the only physical connection I can get right now.
The tech grabs the wand she will use and places it against Raven’s stomach, rubbing the jelly all around. She reaches and hits a button on the machine and a whoosh, whoosh, whoosh fills the room.
“Is that the baby’s heartbeat?” I ask. I’m trying to contain my excitement here, but from the smile spreading across my face, you wouldn’t be able to tell.
“Yeah, a strong heartbeat.” She goes about checking bone sizes, a couple other measurements, and checks the heart. She then starts working the wand around in one small spot—trying to get the right angle—to see whether I’m going to have a little girl or a little boy.
“Alright, mom and dad. You ready?” Again with the head nods, I stare straight at the screen, trying to figure it out for myself before she tells us. No such luck, since I have no clue what it is I’m really looking for.
“Well, congrats, dad. You might want to stock up on some guns.” I groan and my Angel has the nerve to laugh out an “I told you so.” Damn her.
“You don’t need to give him a reason for more guns. He’ll turn our house into a fortress by the time she arrives.”
Laughing, the tech stands up and hands Raven a towel for her to wipe the jelly off. “Congratulations, you two, here are some pictures you get to take home for yourselves.”
She leaves the room without another word. Raven hands me the pictures and stands up from the exam table. Fastening her jeans, she gives me a sly look. “I really don’t think you have as much to worry about as you think. You have some years before you will have to put any guns to use.”
“Your fortress idea sounds like a great plan.”
Her eyes light up, a smile that reaches her eyes splitting her face. “If I wouldn’t know better, I think I found your kryptonite. The big, bad biker can’t handle having a little girl.”
“You’re damn right I can’t handle this shit!”
I hand her the pictures so she can look at them. Once we schedule her next appointment, we end up going for a drive, which takes us to a store called Pottery Barn for kids. Jesus, this store is fucking expensive, but if I’m going to have a little girl, she’s going to have the best of the best.
She’s not going to need for anything. Love, food
, clothes… whatever she wants, she’ll get. Oh, her mom probably will, too.
I just continue to smile as I follow my fiancée through this store, wondering what the fuck I did right to deserve to be this fucking happy.
Epilogue
Mace
TODAY IS MY BABY girl’s first birthday party. I’ve balked and fought over every single pink thing that entered this house. But just as I think I’ve won… more pink arrives.
At least I won with the nursery and we did a light green and pink theme. That way I’m not overwhelmed every time I walk in there. And I spend a lot of time in there.
“Gunner! Since you’re not helping us set up, can you please grab your daughter and get her dressed?”
“Sure. Where is my little firecracker?” This child acts like she’s running on Red Bull twenty-four hours a day. I wish I could syphon some of her energy to make it through more than half of a day before I’m wanting to take a nap.
“She’s running around somewhere.” Raven barely spares me a glance as she runs around the kitchen, trying to get all the food together and in their specific containers.
“Rosalynn Marie! Where are you?”
A high-pitched squeal sounds from the direction of her room. Shit, I hope she isn’t destroying it like she did yesterday. I walk briskly toward her room.
“Rose, please, for the love of all things holy, tell me you’re not making it look like Toys-R-Us threw up in there!”
When I walk in, I’m not prepared for what I see. My child is naked and playing in a dirty diaper full of shit. Fuck my life.
“Firecracker, your mommy is going to murder me. Daddy’s President of a motorcycle club and can take anyone on, but I can’t beat your mommy. She’s going to be so upset. Let’s go get a bath real quick.”
Picking her up under her armpits, I hold her away from my body, considering I’m already dressed. I plop her down in the tub in the bathroom across the hall from her room. Turning the water on, I sit and watch as the water fills up.
She’s just playing in the water, splashing around while chanting, “Baf, baf, baf…” She’s so fucking cute.
Never did I imagine I would be the guy who whips his phone out at a moment’s notice to record something Rose is doing. I became that parent.
She’s slowly sucking all of my manliness right out of me.
I wouldn’t trade a fucking second of my crazy-ass life for anything. I love my girls, more than anything else in this world. That is the only reason you’ll catch me in a bathroom washing shit off of my toddler.
I love my life.
***
Raven
So much has happened since Gunner was shot. Well, maybe not so much, but it sure as hell feels that way to me. We redecorated the house after we finished the nursery. Gunner went on a safety kick, making sure all sharp edges on the furniture were guarded, all outlets were covered, doorknobs baby proofed, and so on. Even though none of that would’ve been needed throughout most of the first year, he insisted it all be done before our daughter was born.
I was amazed at how involved Gunner was throughout everything. If he wasn’t working on the nursery, or baby proofing something in the house, he was wanting to buy his ‘little princess’ something. And he never missed a doctor’s appointment. Now here we are, celebrating Rosalynn’s first birthday.
I can’t believe she’s already a year old. Everyone is here, too. All the guys from the club and their families, Dad, Luke, Jazz. Even Ginger and Big Bertha helped me and Jazz make the food for the party.
“Good turn out,” Jazz says as she comes to stand next to me, a beer in hand.
“It is,” I smile. I watch everyone around us laughing and having a good time. I never once thought my life would be like this. After finding Mom dead, I never allowed myself to think of a happy ever after.
“Rosalynn looks so happy. I think she loved Auntie Jazz’s gift best,” Jazz grins.
“Yeah, because it’s a great way to ruin something in the house. You just had to get her a tie-dye kit.” I laugh, shaking my head.
“Nah, it’ll be fun.” She waves a hand through the air to dismiss the idea that our princess would ever do wrong.
“Jas!” Rosalynn screams as she runs up with her hands in the air.
“Yes, princess?” Jazz asks, squatting down to lift her up.
“Pway!”
“You want to play?” Jazz laughs. Rose nods her head furiously and giggles.
“Well, it is your birthday, your royal highness.” She drops into a curtsy before shooting me a wink and sauntering off with Rose.
“Do you want a drink?” Gunner asks as he wraps his arms from behind me around my waist, his chin resting in the crook of my shoulder.
“No, I’m good, babe,” I sigh, my body relaxing into him.
“Have a beer with me, Angel. Everyone’s taken care of, it’s time to relax and enjoy.” He presses soft, feather light kisses to the side of my neck. Desire swirls through my veins.
“Mmm. Don’t start something you can’t finish,” I warn playfully.
“Oh, Angel, I can finish,” he chuckles, his breath hot against my neck. “Pretty sure Rosalynn is proof of that.”
“Well, Rose isn’t the only proof,” I whisper. I wasn’t sure how I was going to tell him, but today seems as good as a time than any.
His lips cease their sensual assault. His arms tense to rock. “What?”
“Remember that time you finally took me on Kate?”
“How could I forget? Hottest fucking night ever,” he growls into my ear.
“Well, seems like we’ll be pushing the wedding off until I can get my body back… again… after this little guy arrives.” I turn in his arms and gently press my lips to his. He breaks our kiss, pulling back and just stares at me, his eyes wide, mouth slack.
“Say something.”
“We’ve…you…you’re pregnant?”
I can’t help but smile at his stunned reaction. “Seven weeks.”
Without another word, he crushes his lips to mine. Owning my mouth, every emotion and thought is shared as our tongues glide with each other’s. He quickly pulls away before he shouts to everyone, “I’m going to be a dad!” Cheers erupt from our friends and family as Gunner picks me up and spins us around in a circle.
“You already are a dad,” I remind him, laughing.
“Again,” he grins. Pressing his forehead to mine, he sets me back on my feet and whispers, “I’m going to be a dad. God, Angel, I don’t even know what to say.”
“I love you.”
“I love you, too.”
***
Jazz
I’m happy for Raven. I really am. If anyone deserves this happiness, it’s her. After her mom killed herself, I never thought I’d get my best friend back. Shit was dark for a long time following that, and rightfully so. It took forever to get her back, but she’s stayed guarded after it all, only letting a slim few through her walls.
It’s amazing to see her as happy as she is. And being Auntie Jazz is the best experience ever, but it makes me feel a bit lonely. Seeing my best friend’s life moving forward, I feel like I’m at a standstill in my life. I’m all for having fun, but I won’t allow myself to find that happiness.
Ever since the shit that happened to me at Jake’s club, I feel like I hesitate on every decision. And if I don’t, then I’m constantly second guessing a decision I made. I mean, what kind of moron will go back to a club where bad shit happened to them the first time? Me. That’s who.
“Jazz.” Creep’s low, husky voice floats over me. Internally, I sigh, but I steel my face to hide the way he affects me. I continue to clear the last of the used paper plates and napkins into the trash bag. “You’re avoiding me again.”
I risk a quick look at him, knowing I shouldn’t. His head is bald, his body strong and firm. Even though he towers over me, I still feel safe and protected when I’m with him. So why can’t I give in to his constant requests?
“I’m
not avoiding you, Creep. I’m busy.”
“Bullshit,” he spits, his eyes narrow, jaw clenched. When he crosses his arms over his chest, his muscles ripple. Even through the short sleeves of his shirt, I can make out every dip and curve under the fabric. “You slipped out in the middle of the night and have avoided me ever since,” he growls.
“Do you not understand the definition of a one night stand? I’d rather avoid the awkward next morning and walk of shame.”
“Honey, there’s no awkward or shame when we’re together and you know it. Only fireworks.” A crooked grin lights up his face, forcing me to turn away before I turn to mush.
“Whatever. Here,” I hand him the full garbage bag before turning to walk away.
“Where you goin’?” he yells after me.
“Crazy!” I shoot over my shoulder. I hear him groan in annoyance right before I walk inside to say my goodbyes. When I finally walk out to my car, Creep is right on my tail. Gunner gives me a quick hug but stops him before he follows me. As soon as I hear the word ‘club’ leave Gunner’s mouth, I silently thank him for the distraction to give me time to leave.
I peel away from the curb right as Creep makes it to the sidewalk. The last thing I want to do right now is make shit more awkward. I’m hoping if I continue to give him the cold shoulder, he’ll eventually get the hint.
My phone buzzes loudly and I contemplate on whether I should check it. I know texting and driving is bad, but there’s no oncoming traffic right now, just a car behind me. I grab my phone and swipe the screen to bring the text message up. I should have known it would be from Creep.
What are you so afraid of, woman?
Woman? Really? I glance at the road to ensure my car is straight and nothing is coming before typing out a quick response.
This woman has a name, asshole.
Rolling my eyes, I toss my phone on the passenger seat. When I look up, a ginormous buck is standing in the road. “Oh, fuck!” My foot slams on the brakes, my tires screeching against the pavement. When I turn my wheel to hopefully miss him, I lose complete control of the car.
