by Nhys Glover
The madness that had claimed the monster only moments before was eerily absent now, as it turned in her direction. She saw blue eyes staring at her, glowing strangely in the moonlit darkness. Those eyes held wildness and something else…Regret? Shame? Surely not.
Then the anomaly struck her.
Blue eyes? How could this beast have blue eyes?
But before she could properly process what she was seeing, the monster began to lope towards her.
For a moment, Fidelia almost gave in to the urge to run. But her dress was too cumbersome, her shoes not suitable for the snow. And she was just too tired, traumatised and defeated to even attempt an escape. If her fate was to be torn apart by this beast, as it had done to Rathgart, then so be it.
But the huge wolf-creature came to a halt just in front of her. It whined and cocked its head to the side, as if trying to understand why she just stood there, waiting for her end. Then it moved closer and sniffed at her hand, its bloody muzzle soft against her gloved skin.
Surely, if it was going to take her down it would be snarling at her, wouldn’t it?
Instead, it was nudging her hand gently, as if asking to be stroked. The creature stood almost to her breast, and its frame was huge. She should have been terrified. But, as the beast continued to gently nudge her hand, she realised she wasn’t afraid. This creature from her worst nightmare didn’t mean her any harm.
Tentatively, she lifted her hand and rested it on top of the surprisingly soft fur of its head. Familiar blue eyes met hers for a moment before closing, as if savouring the moment. Then it lifted its great head, encouraging her to do more than rest her hand there. Slowly, very slowly, she began to stroke the beast between its ears, and then down its neck. It whined again and ran its jowls along the side of her breast, more like a cat than a dog.
A cold wind blew at her skirts and she shivered. Now that the immediate threat of death from the beast had passed, she realised she was still in great danger. If she didn’t find shelter soon, she would die. Her clothes, which barely kept her warm enough within the heated coach, were now no impediment to the icy wind.
The wolf turned and began nudging her toward the woods. Should she let it take her? Maybe it waited to kill her until it was closer to its home. Even for such a big beast, dragging her body would have been difficult. But no, she was giving human intellect to an instinctual creature. It would never think to do something so sensible. And if food was what it was after, it would have eaten Rathgart or dragged his body to its home.
She let it nudge her on, still undecided about its intentions. What she did know was that staying where she was seemed the poorest of alternatives. At least if she was moving, she could keep warm. And the roads were deserted. No passing carriage would come down this road to pick her up. They had been the only fools out on the road tonight.
Because she had the blind pulled down on the carriage, she hadn’t been aware of her surroundings until she left it. By moonlight, all she had seen was trees. But the further into the forest she went, the more she was aware of something towering in front of them, something bigger than the trees, something that blocked out part of the sky. It was a rocky cliff gouged out of the hillside, she decided, as the wolf led her to its base.
Then, before she had properly taken it in, the creature nudged her to the right and she saw a cave entrance. Was this the creature’s home? Would there be other wolves in that cave, wolves less friendly than this one?
It didn’t give her a chance to wonder further. Another gust of freezing air had her moving forward at its direction, lowering her head to enter the small, confined space. No, not big enough for a family of these creatures. If this was its home, then it lived here alone. It was so dark she could only make out the outline of the walls as she felt her way with her hands. At least the snow hadn’t blown in, and when she bent over to touch it, the dirt of the cave floor seemed dry.
She sat down, her back against the wall, and wrapped her arms around her legs, shivering so hard her teeth chattered.
The wolf-creature sat down next to her and leaned against her side. Its body was heavenly warm and soft and so she carefully lifted her arm and wrapped it around the creature’s neck. As if that was exactly what it had wanted, the wolf whined and rubbed its muzzle against the side of her face. It smelled of blood and feral creature, but although she grimaced, she didn’t draw away. Damp dog was a familiar smell, and this wasn’t that different. And this damp, smelly monster was soft and warm, and willing to share its comfort and heat with her. Who was she to reject it?
Soon, she found tiredness overcoming her, and she leaned in to the wolf more heavily. When it shifted into a lying position, she followed it, laying across the full length of its body with her head resting on its neck, curling in, so that as much of her body as possible was in contact with the warm fur.
And much to her surprise, she felt sleep overtake her as the warmth soaked deep into her bones.
CHAPTER SEVEN
'Phil, stop pushing your horse,' Byron said from the back of his own huge stallion. ‘We have to watch the tracks. If we go too fast we might miss something important.’
'I am trying, but I am afraid that they will get further ahead of us the longer we dawdle along like this. I am worried about my friend! If Rathgart still has her she is already ravished. If Jasper caught up to them and turned… She could be dead or injured. Turned. He betrayed us, Byron. Jasper risked lives. He risked Dee's life, going off like that! I will never forgive him!'
' Phil, please, I know you are worried, but I do not think Jasper is a threat to her, even if he did come across her in his beast form. He is a studious scholar! Even in wolf form he is more reticent than the others, gentler somehow. This behaviour is uncharacteristic, you know that. But it does not mean he would harm her.'
'So he is changing! People do! I know he is your friend, but he is also a monster! I will never forgive him if he has hurt her! I was the one who kept telling them that it was an illness and they were not their wolves. But damn it, Byron, he was manhandling her when he was in human form. And he admitted to nearly ravaging her, again in human form, before he regained control. He claimed she was unafraid of him, but how do we know he was telling us the truth? If he would betray us with the key to his cell, then he cannot be trusted at all.' Phil burst into exhausted tears brought on by fear and a long, cold night in the saddle. Byron brought his mount in closer to hers and reached over to take her hand.
'You have been here for such a short time. It is hard for you to understand. They each have a character, a personality in werewolf form. It is often not so different from their human self. I know we can never trust any of them around humans when 'turned', but I know Jasper. I have watched him in and out of werewolf form for two and a half years. If he found her, I do not believe he would hurt her.'
At that moment they reached a bend in the road, and around the corner they saw a dark shape lying in the roadway ahead. They kicked their horses into a canter and reached the body quickly. Byron dismounted and moved closer to get a better look.
‘Oh, Lord help us! It is he, is it not?’ Phil said with disgust, her gorge rising at the bloody sight.
‘Walrus moustache, young and skinny. Most likely. His throat has been torn out. It can only have been done by Jas.’ He looked around at the disturbed snow and the tracks of the carriage. ‘Looks like the carriage left him. Maybe Dee was still on board.’
Phil searched the surrounding area. When she saw tracks heading away from the carriage to their left, she rode over for a closer look.
‘These are the marks of a woman’s skirt dragging through the snow. Look! And here are wolf tracks. Surely this cannot be right.’
Byron walked over to her horse and squatted down for a closer inspection. ‘It looks like they are walking together. Off that way…’He pointed into the woods. At that moment, the naked form of Lord Jasper Horton came into view. Phil turned her gaze to the ground.
‘Jas, old man! Are you all r
ight? Is Dee all right? Good Lord, you are freezing!’
Jasper hurried over to the dead body and began tearing off its clothes, with little concern for the bloody corpse. The man was smaller and skinnier than Jasper, but at least having something covering his body seemed to rid him of some of his blue colouring.
‘Jasper, where is Dee? If you hurt her, I swear I will kill you!’ Phil cried in exasperation as she watched him silently putting on the undersized overcoat and fur hat.
Jasper looked up and met her gaze. ‘She is fine. The wolf led her to a nearby cave and used his body to keep her warm all night. She was asleep when I came back to myself and decided I better get some clothes on before she woke up. If you follow my tracks, you will find her. I have to go find Conrad. I tied him up under a rock overhang a few miles away when I felt the change start.’
‘What happened?’ Byron asked.
‘Time for all that later. I will get this body off the road so it does not get found. Then I will go for Conrad. You get Dee. She will be cold without me keeping her warm.’
‘You did not hurt her?’ Phil asked again, still not reassured.
‘No. Neither the wolf nor I did her any harm. The beast killed this blackguard, though. And I feel no remorse over it. He received his just deserts. I do not know if he had his way with her, but what I can remember of last night, she seemed well enough. Not overly traumatised, considering she had seen a wolf tear a man to pieces and then had that same creature befriend her.’
‘You will not come with us to find her?’
‘No. It is better that she does not see me dressed like this. She might start putting the pieces together, and I do not think I could handle her knowing what I am.’
‘You do not think she connects you with the beast?’ Phil asked, calmer now.
‘I do not think so. Why should she?’
With that, he started dragging the corpse off the road. Byron remounted and led Phil off into the woods, following the tracks Jasper and Fidelia had made.
Fidelia came awake to a bone deep chill. She looked down at the ground beneath her and saw her hands, filthy and blue with cold. Then she looked up and saw the low roof of the cave above her. Bit by bit, memories of the night before started coming back to her. When she remembered the wolf, she jerked upright, searching the shadowy corners for his bulky form.
But her senses already knew he wasn’t there. His feral smell was faint and fading. He had left her some time ago, then. She didn’t know whether she was relieved or disappointed. The creature had been the only thing that kept her alive through the night. And kept her sane…if she was willing to admit it. They had formed a bond, strange as it was, and now she missed that bond. Missed the wolf.
She clambered out of the cave into the morning sunshine. It was late. Maybe ten o’clock. How had she slept so long? As she stretched her back to get the kinks out, she looked around. There was no sign of the wolf. But what was that in the snow? A man’s bare footprints leading back the way they had come the night before. What would a man be doing walking around in the snow without shoes?
Fidelia flashed to Jasper, standing naked and blue in the doorway of the hotel’s back entrance. He had been walking around in the snow in bare feet yesterday morning. But why would he be doing the same thing here?
Before she could think too much about that, she heard the sound of horses approaching. Then, as if by some miracle, she saw Phil and Byron riding towards her.
‘Oh thank heavens!’ she cried as she started running toward them, dragging her wet, snow-soaked skirts with her.
‘Dee! Oh Dee, I was so worried! Are you all right?’ Phil threw herself from her mare and came to Fidelia’s side. She wrapped her in a bear hug and clung for several long minutes, sharing her body heat with her. ‘Tell me you are unharmed!’
Fidelia laughed and then began to cry. It was all too much! ‘Yes…Yes, I am fine. Thanks to a big wolf that stopped the carriage, killed Rathgart and brought me here. It was the strangest night of my life. But I am so glad you found me! I did not know what I was going to do.’
‘Come on, you can ride with me. We need to get you to the nearest inn so you can have a hot breakfast and warm up by the fire. You must be freezing.’ Phil led her back to her horse, and Byron, who had dismounted when Phil had, helped her up onto the horse. Then he assisted Phil up, too. Cuddled close to her friend, Fidelia felt impossibly happy for the first time in days.
‘Rathgart’s body should be back on the road,’ she said as they began to walk the horses back the way they had come.
‘Yes. It has been taken care of. He is dead and will never bother you again. Did he…?’ Phil didn’t finish her question, but Fidelia knew exactly what she was asking.
‘No, he was trying to get us to Gretna Green as quickly as possible. He planned to marry me and then bed me. But I would never have agreed to either. I would have died first. Luckily, I did not need to. Although, there was a few moments, when that great wolf came toward me, after it finished with Rathgart, when I was sure I was done for.
‘But all it did was sniff my hand and get me to stroke its head. Then it nudged me into the woods to that cave. It cuddled up close to keep warm, I suppose, although I think it was warm enough. I was the one who needed the heat, so I am not complaining, although I must smell terrible.’ She was rambling, she knew, but couldn’t bring herself to stop. ‘I do not know what would have happened if it had not stood in the road, making the carriage stop. Or if Rathgart had managed to shoot it. I thought he had shot me when the blast went off. But then I saw that the carriage was leaving and the wolf was tossing Rathgart around like a toy. I was sure I was going to be next. How could a wild creature be so vicious one minute and so tame the next?’
‘I do not know, Dee. But I am glad he was,’ Phil said softly.
‘I am not sure if it was male or female. I thought it was male, but it was so gentle I decided it had to be female. I wonder what happened to it?’
‘Hunting, probably. Do not worry about that now. You are safe. That is all that matters. And now you do not have a mad man to worry about.’
For a moment, Fidelia considered the other mad man in her life. Jasper. The man who had manhandled her and treated her so poorly one minute, then made passionate love to her in what felt like the next. But of course, there had been a day between those events. Yet, in the end, it was the pain she remembered from their time together: pain of rejection, confusion, and from something she could not properly name – Unrequited love? Was that the feeling? Having never experienced it, she had no idea. But she had read about it, and her reactions did seem similar.
But how could it be unrequited love when she had only just met the man? They barely shared more than a few sentences of conversation between them. More like it was unrequited lust. The man had aroused feelings in her that were new and tantalizing, and she had wanted more of them. But he had turned from her and told her to go, to leave Harrogate and get as far away from him as possible. And her new colourful life had suddenly turned grey.
Her heart hurt at the memory.
By late that afternoon, Fidelia was once more ensconced in her room at the private hotel in Harrogate with the fussing Maude her constant shadow. Over and over again Phil reassured Maude that Fidelia was now safe, and that in the morning she was to bring her mistress out to the Keep where she would be even safer. But Maude continued to fret.
‘But Jasper told me to go away. He will be mortified to have me underfoot,’ Fidelia said, even though the idea of going back to London so soon was the last thing she wanted to do.
‘It is not Jasper’s right to tell you to go or stay. You are my friend and I want you to stay with me for a few weeks, just until all this unpleasantness has faded. It seems that you have been beset with disasters in the last month or so. You do not deserve it. And I am going to do all that is in my power to try to make it up to you somehow.’
Fidela smiled in defeat. She liked it when Phil became bossy and protective like
this. It took her decisions from her and she could feel like a cossetted child once more. But, as she sat staring out at the white scene from the window of her rooms, she knew that being treated like a child was not what she really wanted anymore. She was an adult, a widow who had for a few short years, had the responsibility of children. Even though she had been kidnapped, she managed to survive. With the help of a beast, her conscience reminded her. Still, she had stood up to a great deal more than she ever thought she could. So it was time to rethink her assumptions about herself.
For one thing, thanks to Jasper, she had discovered that she was capable of “Grand Passion”. Even if that passion ended up hurting her greatly, she still discovered she was not the passionless milksop she had always seen herself to be.
Second, she had not fallen apart when a man tried to ravage her. Instead, she had taken action by coming here. That the man had somehow found out where she was and followed her was irrelevant. As was the fact that he had taken her captive and would have tried again to have his way with her, if not for the intervention of a beast. What mattered was that she had taken action rather than allowing events to take her where they would.
It still felt like an impossibly fortuitous twist of fate that had brought that great creature into the path of her carriage last night. And an even stranger twist to have that same creature kill her kidnapper, but keep her alive through a freezing winter’s night. How could such a remarkable series of events occur?
And what of Jasper arriving naked at her door yesterday, and the bare footprints of a man outside her cave this morning. What did that mean? Or did those two occurrences have no relationship to each other?
If Jasper could bear to be in the same room with her, she might ask him for more details of his so-called robbery. He had looked remarkably unharmed that morning for someone who had been put upon by villains and had every possession stolen. Jasper hardly looked the type to just stand there and let someone do such a thing to him without fighting back.
