by Lisa DeVore
“Of course,” she sniffed as she dabbed her eyes. What was she thinking? He was offering to be there for her? His concern was for Andrea. She understood.
Andrea came bounding up to her. “Aunt Jen, can we go now?”
Her niece appeared totally unaffected while she could hardly contain the panic that was growing stronger by the second. At thirty-one, she had lost her parents, her brother-in-law, and now her sister…and gained full time responsibility of an eight year-old child. And she was face to face with the only man she ever loved; the man that turned her away.
“Aunt Jen?” Andrea whined.
“I’ll follow you,” Chase promised.
Jena’s nod was her only reply. She didn’t dare open her mouth. If she did, she would scream. She was smothering under all the demands and expectations. Jena concentrated on suppressing the panic. She was going to raise Jasmine’s daughter just as Jasmine had raised her. She was a Shea, and they lived up to their responsibilities.
She took Andrea’s hand and led her to the car. Her head was starting to pound. The sooner she could get through this, the sooner she could take Andrea back to Ohio and resume her life.
With Andrea nodding off in the backseat, the ride to her sister’s house gave her plenty of time to think. Her memories became a movie in her mind, drifting to the night her parents died, her sister taking charge, raising her, sacrificing for her… Jasmine put her through law school. When she met Collin on vacation and moved to Florida Jena supported the decision. Yes, the move was out of character for Jasmine, but Jena didn’t question her. She deserved happiness and Collin was a great guy. Jena smiled as she thought of him. Then she had met Chase. Jena sighed. No happy ending there.
Pulling in the driveway, Jena nudged Andrea. “Wake up, honey, we’re here.”
Andrea yawned and climbed out of the car, holding her stuffed teddy bear closely. Jena followed her to the back of the house and into the kitchen. Food trays, casserole dishes, and desserts covered every available space. Mrs. Reynolds, the housekeeper, was busily removing tin foil and plastic wrap as Andrea inspected the cookies.
“Can I help with anything, Mrs. R.?” Jena asked hopefully. Maybe she could hide out in the kitchen.
“I have everything ready. We only need to move it to the tables. Are you all right, dear?”
“I’m holding up, thanks.” Exhaling deeply she tossed her purse on the counter. “And thank you for doing all of this. I don’t know how I’d cope without you.”
She gave Jena a quick hug. “We all have our way of dealing with grief, and this is mine. Andrea, make yourself a plate, dear. My great-niece is in the living room waiting for you.”
“Noel’s here?” Andrea’s excitement was evident, but she remembered her manners. “May I go, Aunt Jen?”
“Sure, go on. Make sure you eat something.”
Andrea was through the door before Jena turned her attention back to Mrs. R. “You know, she’s as cool as a cucumber and I’m falling apart. I’m supposed to be taking care of her.”
“None of that now. You’re doing fine. That girl is lucky to have you and Chase.”
With the mention of his name, Jena flinched. Had the housekeeper noticed?
“By the way, where is Chase?” Mrs. R. questioned with hands on hips.
“I don’t know. He said he was following us.” She cleared her throat. The heat of embarrassment crept up her neck and into her face. Hoping to gain composure, she turned her back and filled a glass with water.
“I’m sure you’ll feel better, dear, once he gets here.” Mrs. R. walked over to the kitchen window and peered out. Jena heard her say under her breath, “Where is that boy? He needs to be here for you.”
Jena’s temper rose as she became defensive. She took a deep breath, considering her words before speaking. Mrs. R. was more than a housekeeper. She was family to Andrea and Jasmine, and Jena didn’t want to hurt her feelings. “Mrs. R., Chase is Andrea’s uncle and is welcome to be here for her. He is nothing to me. I don’t know why you would think otherwise.”
Jena grabbed two covered dishes before she bolted for the living room. Why must everyone assume she needed Chase Reiss? She hadn’t needed him for ten years and she sure as hell wasn’t going to start now.
Chapter Three
Chase took the scenic route to Jasmine’s house in an attempt to gather some self-control. He wanted to kiss away the tears, hold her in his arms and tell her how wrong he had been. He was desperate to explain why he walked away all those years ago. When he saw her in the church he had to force himself to keep quiet about the past. This wasn’t the time. Oh, she was polite, but he knew she wished he would disappear.
Chase turned the radio on in an attempt to distract himself from his thoughts. Great, just what he needed to hear, a sappy love song. Shutting the radio off in disgust, he let his thoughts drift again. He would wait, but he would make her understand why he ended their relationship. He wanted a second chance and he wouldn’t stop until he got just that.
He rolled to a stop in front of the house and shut the motor off, watching people enter through the front door. He knew his presence wouldn’t be appreciated, but this is where he needed to be. “Well, no putting it off, Dude,” he said aloud, opening the truck door with a confidence he wasn’t feeling. He decided to use the back entrance, maybe talk to the housekeeper first.
“Well, now, my kitchen is Grand Central Station today,” Mrs. R. complained. “The food is in there,” she pointed toward the living room.
“Hey, calm down. I always come in through the kitchen.” With the look Mrs. R. gave him he quickly backtracked, holding his hands up in surrender. “Okay, okay…sorry.”
“Anyway, it’s about time you got here. Where have you been?” she demanded.
Attempting a convincing fib, he grabbed a cookie. “I had to stop for gas.”
“Chase, I’m not an idiot. Any fool can see you’re still in love with that girl.”
“Excuse me?”
“Chase Reiss, I have known you going on a year now, have I not?”
He inwardly cringed while Mrs. R. went into lecture mode. The door was a few feet away. He could make a run for it. No, she would follow him and make his life hell. He decided on self-preservation. “Yes, ma’am, you have.”
“Jasmine and I have had many a conversation over you two.”
Here it comes, he thought. He chose silence.
“She was hoping this vacation of Jena’s would be a reunion of the romantic kind.”
“That was a long time ago.”
“Chase, don’t insult my intelligence.”
Uh-oh. The last thing he wanted was Mrs. R.’s anger directed at him. “I’m not. She doesn’t share the admiration.”
“Oh, well, look at you. The big rock star,” she quipped.
“That’s part of the problem,” he replied honestly.
Leaning against the kitchen counter, arms folded in front of her, Mrs. R. replied, “If you don’t try to make this right you will regret it for the rest of your life.”
“I already have plenty of regrets.”
“So, why add this to the file?” she challenged.
“Now is not the time,” he reasoned.
“I’ve heard of giving people their space, but ten years is a bit much, don’t you think?”
He shook his head slowly and grinned. Mrs. R. was direct and he usually liked that about her. “Thanks for the advice.”
“Well, it’s free, so do what you want with it.” She whipped a dishtowel over her shoulder and filled the sink with water.
He was dismissed. Chase placed his hand on the swinging door that separated him from Jena and paused. Jasmine just died. Complicating her life further would be selfish, right? He couldn’t do that.
Pushing through the door he found the room full of people. He immediately spotted Jena talking with a guy who looked a little too interested in her. His muscles tensed, blood pounded in his ears.
He clenched his hands int
o fists, suddenly realizing he was the selfish type. Jena was his and he would make her see that…starting now.
****
Jena attempted a smile as she forced herself to concentrate on the words coming from a boring surgeon that had her cornered. He was a little too touchy-feely with his conversation and certainly had no self-esteem issues as he bragged on about his attributes. She looked for an escape. She gazed toward the kitchen door as Chase’s eyes locked on hers. Her heart pounded so loudly she imagined everyone in the room could hear it. Allowing herself to get lost in those eyes would be a huge mistake. Choosing her pride, she turned her attention back to the arrogant Dr. Neanderthal.
Chase’s intoxicating scent was forever burned in her brain. She knew he was beside her before turning to see him. Jena took a deep, meant-to-be calming breath…a mistake…forced a smile, and went on with the introduction. “Dr. Netherington, this is Collin’s brother, Chase Reiss. Chase, Dr. Netherington. He was on staff with Collin.”
The words were barely out of her mouth when Dr. Neanderthal turned into an excited child with hero worship. “The Chase Reiss? The rock singer? I’m a huge fan. Can I have an autograph? The nurses will go crazy!”
Chase exchanged a handshake with the doctor, but Jena saw something different in his demeanor. The flash in his eyes confirmed he was angry about something. Jena bit down on her lower lip.
Watching the exchange in amazement, she heard Chase answer, “Sure, I’ll sign something before you leave.”
Rock Singer? Chase? Jasmine mentioned a band…must be a local thing.
Gratefully dismissing herself with an “I’ll let you two talk”, Jena moved to the food table. Grabbing a plate, she went through the motions of filling it.
Chase came up behind her. “Smooth, Jena, really smooth.”
Startled, she replied, “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”
“Nice attempt to brush me off; however, don’t forget I’m used to dealing with that.”
“I don’t want to seem like I’m using the same excuse, but really, I don’t have any idea what you’re talking about.”
“The rock thing…” She could tell he was trying to control his impatience with a deep breath.
“Rock thing?” Cryptic language wasn’t her forte. She could come up with nothing but a blank stare.
“I’m in a band,” he explained.
Taking a bite of celery and thinking back, “I remember Jasmine did mention something about that.” Truth was she always tuned out when Chase was mentioned in conversation….coping mechanism.
“You weren’t trying to get rid of me?”
“If only it were that easy,” she muttered loud enough for him to hear. Regretting the audible slip, she turned away from the table praying someone would approach her. When the only response was a low growl she quickly stole a glance in his direction.
His eyes narrowed and the muscles in his jaw twitched. Now, she’d done it. She insulted him. Jena nervously looked from side to side to see if anyone was paying attention to them. She knew Chase wouldn’t let the remark slide.
“Let’s get one thing straight. You… are stuck with me. I’m Andrea’s uncle and I can promise you…I’m not going anywhere.”
Confrontation came as easy to her as breathing. As a lawyer, she dealt with it daily. She really didn’t want a showdown at her sister’s funeral reception, but he was leaving her no choice. He was out of his league if he thought he could threaten her! Lifting her chin and putting on her lawyer hat, she replied coolly, “Yes…let’s get one thing straight. You are Andrea’s uncle, but you are nothing to me. I don’t need you. After this is all settled I’ll be going back home with Andrea and you can go back to whatever it is you do.”
He smiled at her through his anger. “I see we have some things to discuss.”
Adrenaline was pumping through her veins. Jena wasn’t sure if she could manage civility. She was always in control and this was disturbing. “I have nothing else to say.”
“I have plenty,” he threatened, “and I look forward to clearing the air.”
“Whatever you like, Chase, but it’ll change nothing.”
“We’ll see,” he met her eyes with the challenge.
Jena forced a smile. “If you’ll excuse me?” She made a beeline right for Dr. Netherington. As soon as he saw her approaching he grinned and winked in her direction. She immediately regretted her childish behavior. Now, she would pay for her rash decision as she attempted to extricate herself from his overblown opinion of himself.
As Dr. Neanderthal blathered on Jena silently replayed her conversation with Chase. She wasn’t sure what Chase was planning, but she would not allow him to take her independence or decide her life. He would not use Andrea as an excuse. Yes, they would fight this out, but he wouldn’t be facing the girl of ten years ago. Strength hadn’t come easy to her, but she had managed to develop a very strong backbone. She wouldn’t allow him to destroy who she’d become. Their relationship was officially buried.
Chapter Four
Jena mingled amongst those who knew her sister best. Tears were shed, stories were told, and even some laughter was in the mix. Gratefully, the last person left leaving Jena to survey the room. Half full red cups, foam plates with uneaten food, and casserole dishes that needed to be covered and refrigerated surrounded her. Sighing at the mess, she rubbed her palms over her eyes. The burning feeling reminded her of the sleepless night before. The sooner she cleaned up, the sooner she could climb into bed.
Swinging open the kitchen door Jena stopped in her tracks. Chase sat at the table with a cup of coffee in front of him. Pushing aside her surprise, she continued through the door. “I thought you left.”
Not waiting for an answer, she made her way to the closet to grab a garbage bag. The electricity in the room had her nerves sizzling, but she made every attempt to appear calm.
“Come sit, Jen.”
Jen? Really? How dare he be so familiar? He lost that right years ago.
“We need to talk, and you need to sit. You’re going to fall over from exhaustion.”
She turned to him impatiently. “What I need is to get this mess cleaned up and get some sleep. What I don’t need is another round with you.”
“Give me a couple minutes to say what’s on my mind and I’ll help you.”
She crossed her arms. She was not in the mood to deal with this.
“Please?” he asked softly.
Ignoring the impulse to flee, she pulled out a chair and sat stiffly. The sooner she could put this behind her the better. “I have a feeling when you say what’s on your mind I won’t want your help.”
He chuckled in response. She watched as he walked to the counter and filled his coffee mug, opened the cupboard and removed a cup for her. The thoughtful move softened her thoughts as she followed his every move.
She couldn’t take her eyes off him. He was no longer the lanky boy she fell in love with. He had the build…the muscles of a man. His sleeves rolled up, he turned toward her carrying the mugs in his strong hands; hands that once touched her. Heat filling her face, she quickly looked down wishing she hadn’t agreed to Andrea’s request for a sleepover with Noel. Mrs. R. had left with them over an hour ago, and now she was left alone with him.
He handed her the cup. “Thank you.”
“You’re welcome.” He paused as he sat. “We’re both adults, Jen. We need to talk about what happened.”
She gripped her coffee mug. “I’m a big girl. I’m over that…really.”
The sadness on his face was unmistakable. “You’re angry with me. You avoid me. I think we need to talk about what happened to us.”
Why did he have to go there? “Us? There is no ‘us,’ Chase.”
“It’s me you’re talking to. Did you think Jaz and I didn’t notice all the holidays you missed? The visits that never happened?” He paused and looked down at his coffee. “I’m sorry I was responsible for that.”
“You think you were
responsible for that?” She shook her head from side to side. Her eyes were wide with disbelief. “Wow. Not full of yourself, are you?”
“Stop it, Jena. I deserve your anger. I’ll take it, but at least be honest with me.”
Leaning forward, she replied evenly, “I’m not the naïve girl you knew, Chase. I understand you lost interest. I suppose you had needs. I’m all grown up and educated in the ways of the world now. I don’t need you to bare your soul. If you need some kind of closure, go ahead and say what you need to say, but make it quick, okay?” She glanced at her watch as she rested back against the chair and replied, “I’d like to get some sleep.” She knew she was being snide. The hurt was in his eyes, but she didn’t care. She had carried enough pain in her heart the last ten years to last a lifetime. She had no sympathy for him.
There was no angry response to her tirade. “You think I broke up with you because I lost interest? I broke up with you because I had to make a choice.”
“A choice? Huh. Okay…so, I lost. Case closed. Goodnight, Chase.” The anger she was spewing from her mouth shocked her. The in-control lawyer was non-existent. Pushing out her chair she stood to make her exit.
“Stay.”
The word wasn’t a command, but a plea and Jena saw the pain in his eyes. “What good would it do? It won’t change the past.”
“Maybe the truth will change the future.”
Those eyes again, piercing her soul and leaving her breathless. Placing her palms on the table, she slowly lowered to the chair.
“Thank you…I don’t know where to begin.” He ran his hand absently through his hair. A trait Jena remembered well.
“How about when you turned your back on me and walked away?” Leaning her arms on the table and hiding her face she said, “I’m sorry.”
“I’ll start with how much I loved you…how much I still love you.”
She slowly pulled her hands away and met his eyes with disbelief. She searched his face. Had she heard him right? The breath left her lungs. Jena responded icily, “How dare you say those words to me.”
