by Taryn Quinn
I headed for the ticket booth, but a haunting combination of notes floated my way. I didn’t know the song, but it didn’t stop my shoulders from hunching up in reaction. There was a sadness to the song that climbed inside me and urged me closer. Whoever it was, there was a talent that couldn’t be denied.
Even with the overwhelming feedback from speakers calling out track numbers and the cacophony of conversations, I knew that was definitely the thundering echo of a keyboard.
“Plenty of keyboard players out there,” I muttered to myself. Still, I moved forward toward the crowd. Tall as I was, I still couldn’t see over the heads of half the people. A guitarist strummed out a frantic pace, accompanying the piano. I dodged heads and weaved around people. A few shuffled out of the way for me, but a woman directly in front of me was intent on keeping her spot.
It couldn’t be.
Suddenly a voice rose—and my heart stopped.
There was no denying it now.
Myles.
The urge to back up was overwhelming, but there were too many people around me. The lyrics were unapologetic, the music a study in grit and less polish than I was used to when it came to his songs. The guitar was a steady thrum followed by a slap against the body of the instrument until it mimicked a heartbeat. It framed out Myles’s playing and made the need for drums obsolete.
But it was the words that I couldn’t shut out.
These roads I’ve traveled
Have all led me back here
A shadow of a man
Heart carved out and in hand
In my mind
I offered her all
In my heart
I didn’t trust
These faces I’ve studied
Reminded me of the one
I’ve missed for so long
Heart bleeding and in hand
In my mind
I offered her all
In my heart
I couldn’t trust
These nights I’ve lived
With the ghost of her
Now I need her light
Heart beating in hand
In my mind
I offered her all
In my heart
I needed to trust
Tears dripped down my chin and splashed my chest before I realized it. The lyrics were powerful and gritty. Honest to the point of a knife’s edge. Totally different than the music he created with his band. Myles had always had an amazing voice, but here there was no artifice. It was so raw it made my chest ache.
Finally, the girl in front of me moved to the side.
Myles’s hair was in his eyes and the cords in his neck were straining with the power of his words. He wore a long-sleeved white Henley, the sleeves pushed up to his elbows, revealing the winding color of his ink. A navy vest made his shoulders seem wider. Each wrist was banded with a leather cuff that showed off his amazing arms. A flash of silver caught my eye as his fingers chased down the keyboard before he started slamming out notes again as the song built to its end.
The people around me clapped and a wolf whistle traveled up my spine like an icy finger.
This was a Myles I’d never heard before. Never seen either. He was actually busking like a street performer. There was even a half dozen bills and handfuls of coins littering the guitarist’s case. I didn’t recognize the scruffy-faced man with messy ginger hair and Buddy Holly glasses who was accompanying Myles.
Myles flung back his head and his chest heaved with exertion. He raked his fingers through his curls before smiling into the crowd. “Thanks. First time I’ve played that one.” His smile froze and slid away as he found me in the crowd. “I wrote it with a particular someone in mind.”
I tried to back away, but his voice rose as he picked out soft notes. His voice pure and sweet with the barest piano accompaniment.
I have lost
The light you brought
And in the dark
I found my truth
My head told me to love
My heart trembled and fled
Here I am
Heart full and on edge
Now my head
And my heart
Know where I belong
Damn him. His gaze never left mine. It pinned me as effectively as his arms had yesterday. Up against that wall with all the love and passion in his eyes. Here there was only love.
He had to use words against me.
And unlike the song with my name attached to it, this was honest to a fault.
Honest in a way I hadn’t allowed myself to be.
I wanted to run. There was no way I could say no to this. No way I could walk away. The room shimmered with my tears running unchecked down my stupid cheeks.
Myles came out from behind the piano stand. “Fee, wait.”
I didn’t even know I was trying to run until he caught my hand.
“I’m not here to change your mind.”
“What?” I looked around at the people making way for us. Not dispersing, because of course not. My face flamed as I caught phones being lifted to film us. They’d been filming Myles’s songs, but now we were making a damn spectacle.
“I’m not. I needed to play.” He laughed. “I haven’t said that in a damn long time. I needed to play and I hoped you’d hear me. That I could maybe show you exactly what I was feeling. To let me tell you how I felt the right way.”
“Myles, I can’t do this with all these people.”
“I don’t care who knows.” He looked at the crowd around us. “I’ll tell it to fifty YouTube channels and a thousand Facebook Lives.” Then his gaze locked on mine again. “It doesn’t matter if I tell you here, or yell it over the loudspeaker. I love you, Fee. I’ll wait for you if I need to.”
My heart raced in my chest as I reached up to wipe my tears. Instead, Myles cupped my face, his crazy-long fingers blocking out everyone around us. He brushed away my tears with his thumbs. The silver glint I’d seen was the necklace I’d given him woven into the leather of one of his cuffs.
A sob welled up. “Oh, Myles. I don’t have to go.”
“Of course you do. I’ve chased my dreams for years, but I was really just winding my way back to you.”
“But—”
“We don’t have to stay in Baltimore. I just need you. If you’ll let me, I’ll go with you.”
“Right now?” I couldn’t have heard him correctly. My head was full of white noise. Actually, it was the sound of clapping. I gripped his wrists.
He laughed. “Don’t pay attention to them. Yes, right now. I just happen to be available. I’m unemployed though. Think you can handle that?”
“I always knew you were a slacker at heart.”
“Slacker who loves you like crazy.” He lowered his mouth to mine.
“I love you too,” I said before he closed his mouth over mine.
All too soon, he eased back and blew out a shaky breath. “Thank God.”
The next kiss was sweet and soft with just a little bit of that wild I’d tasted before. And now I didn’t have to live without it. Without him.
“Would you really go with me?” I whispered against his lips. “I have an itinerary and we’d have to get you tickets—”
He shut me up with a hard, thorough kiss. I wanted to melt into the tiled floor as people clapped again. He curled his arms around me, dragging me into his chest. “I’d go anywhere with you, Fee.”
Epilogue
Myles
My shoulder was on fire. Mostly because it was jammed against the hot-enough-to-fry-an-egg window as Fee dozed against my chest. The fact that I wouldn’t move for the world—or flayed flesh—made me a sap. I knew it. Was more than okay with it.
It was our fourth week in Felicity’s crazy, winding itinerary around the United States. We’d tried to get a sleeper car on the last train out of San Jose but the ticket agent had literally laughed in our faces. So here we were wedged against the window as the endless desert of California whipped by.
It had taken some convincing to get her to change course for this last leg of our grand adventure. We’d spent a full week in Portland. I’d been there before, but when touring with a band, there wasn’t time for the touristy things. Airports and venues with a side of hotels if we were lucky had been my normal.
Now it was trains and inventive ways to use a sleeper car. The first week, she wouldn’t hear of using my money. She wanted to try a hostel. That had ended quickly. My Felicity loved the idea of adventure, but the actual reality of communal bathrooms had taken the polish off her to-do list.
Her long, slim fingers slid under my shirt and around my side in sleep.
Another thing I’d learned in the last few weeks was that Felicity liked to touch me—all the time. Even when we’d been platonic, she was a toucher, but nothing like now. Her nails grazed my skin and my traitorous dick didn’t care that we were in the main part of the train with about fifteen people around us.
“Open up those pretty brown eyes. I know you’re not sleeping.”
Her lips twitched. “I’m totally sleeping.”
I stretched and curled my arm around her shoulder, dragging her mouth up to mine. “Liar.”
She moaned into my mouth after a sweet kiss. “Are we there yet?”
“About an hour away from the first stop.”
Felicity winced. “I’m hungry. Think we can go find the food car?”
“If I eat another egg sandwich, I’ll cut someone.” My phone buzzed against my hip. I quickly pulled it out and checked the screen before stuffing it back into my pocket before she could see it.
“One of the guys texting you?”
I’d finally started talking to my old bandmates. Mostly thanks to our video from the Baltimore train station going viral. My original guess of fifty people had been a very low estimate. Nearly a hundred uploads had multiplied as people shared videos on a half dozen forms of social media. Snaps, Instagrams, Facebook, Twitter—you name it, it was out there.
Enough that I’d gotten a few offers from some indie labels asking if I was going solo.
I was thinking about it. And Felicity was behind me all the way. We’d even stopped in at a few Open Mic nights during our tour across the United States. She was scary organized in a way that I’d never understand. She’d started talking about contracts, rights, and even a business license I hadn’t been aware I needed to perform.
Did I mention scary?
But that wasn’t what the text had been about. I smiled down at her. “That was a surprise I have for you in Los Angeles.”
She squinted at me. “What kind of surprise?”
One that I was a little nervous about. I’d fucked up the last time I’d made a decision on my own, but I thought I knew her a little better now. Sharing a sleeper car that was approximately a closet could do that to a body.
She stood up and dragged me out of my seat. “Food.”
Saved by Fee’s rumbling stomach.
Hopefully, this would be my last crappy breakfast on a train. Please God.
I trailed behind her, the steady rocking of the car now a familiar motion in my life. We’d seen amazing things like the French Quarter, the Grand Canyon, Mount Rushmore, and Yosemite. She’d dragged me all over Washington, DC, introduced me to lemon trees in Florida, where we met up with her folks, and we’d picked peaches at a farm in Georgia.
I hadn’t known Felicity was so adept at climbing said trees. Or that juicy peaches tasted even better on a sunny afternoon with a naked and very inventive girl who’d owned my heart for as long as I could remember.
But if we were going to continue on this crazy journey together, I had to get off these goddamn trains.
I’d put the wheels in motion after our first night in a hostel but designing something of this magnitude took time. Four weeks to be exact. Four long goddamn weeks.
Felicity pushed me into a booth. When the harried dining car attendant came by, Felicity slapped a hand over my mouth. “We’ll both have the pancakes, orange juice, and coffee.”
The guy nodded and shuffled off.
“What if I wanted a shitty egg sandwich?”
“Stop it.”
I huffed out an annoyed breath and checked my phone again. She tried to pluck it out of my hand, but I tucked it back into my jacket just in time. “Surprise.”
She gave me a snarl and crossed her arms. We sat shoulder to shoulder, so I knew she wasn’t really mad at me. At least not like she’d been during the ride from DC into Virginia. Keeping my girl away from all the monuments in DC had been a bad idea. I’d been bored out of my mind, but I learned to bring a notebook with me.
And that notebook was now bursting with lyrics.
All in all, traveling with Fee was pretty amazing. There was a sense of wonder and excitement in every one of her researched itineraries. It had taken a few weeks for her to loosen up and let me pick some stops, but it had allowed me to learn a thing or fifteen about my girl.
Now this surprise would be the true test.
Evidently, the Amtrak gods were with me because the pancakes were actually edible. I resisted the urge to shovel them all into my mouth at once. We’d run late for the last train out. Add in the overbooking and way too many people eyeing our upgraded seats—measly upgrade, I might add—and there’d been no dinner last night. Even our ever-present supply of trail mix had run out.
I would have happily eaten a soggy egg and biscuit sandwich that morning, not that I’d tell her that. But I didn’t have to. And when my phone buzzed again, my grin widened.
Product delivered.
Sweetest damn words in the English language.
I shoved another bite of pancake in my mouth and ordered a plate of bacon when our waiter returned.
“I don’t like that smile.”
I grinned down at her. “You love my smile.”
“Hmm.”
A tray of bacon consumed and three cups of coffee later, our stop was called. I’d ordered a driver to pick us up while she paid the bill. She really didn’t like when I tried to pay for things.
“I still don’t know why you wanted to get off here. There’s only a few more stops until we’re in downtown Los Angeles.”
“You’ll see.”
Like the seasoned travelers we were, we knew where to go to get our bags the quickest. Two bags had become three, thanks to our travels. We mailed most things back to our house in Baltimore. Yes, she’d finally relented there. Someday we might even live in the house.
But for now, I was more than ready to make a few upgrades.
“I ordered a car.”
She rolled her eyes. “It ruins the fun when you do that.” But her voice didn’t have the same loaded excitement it usually did when we got to a new town. It had been a damn long night, and I was looking forward to the king-size bed in our future.
The driver was chatty and helpful with the bags. When he parked at the strip mall I’d directed him to, Fee gave me a weird look. “Shopping?”
“Not quite.”
“I’m not really in the mood for another meal at In-N-Out Burger.”
“Bite your tongue, woman.” Nothing was better than an In-N-Out burger. “We’ll be right back,” I told the driver. My extra-large tip should keep him from driving off with our stuff. At least for the ten minutes it would take to show her what I’d done.
Either I’d end up back in the car with my ass handed to me, or she’d be happy as hell.
I led her behind the building at the edge of the strip. She let out a huff of dismay. “Would you stop fooling around? I have a list of places we have to see today and…”
She glanced at me, then the forty-five-foot luxury tour bus parked in front of us. “What did you do?”
I winced. That wasn’t promising. Crap. I swallowed. “Well, you still have at least a month’s worth of places on your list. And I was thinking maybe we could extend it and I could try out—”
I grunted as five-feet-eight-inches of Felicity came crashing into m
y body.
I widened my stance to take her weight as she wrapped her long, glorious legs around my hips and started kissing my face.
“Oh, you didn’t! Oh my God, you glorious, perfect man.” She laced her fingers behind my head and pulled my face up for a full-on kiss.
When she finally let me up for air, I grinned at her. “Good surprise, huh?”
“I hate that train.” She hopped down and ran around the front of the bus. She screeched out a laugh when she caught sight of the driver. “You have a driver?”
“You thought I could drive this thing?”
She ran back to me and I was ready for her this time. “I love you, I love you, I love you.” She punctuated each declaration with a kiss. “I didn’t want to tell you I hated the train because it was my idea, but oh my God, I hate that smelly train.”
I laughed. “Well, I figured if I wasn’t a fan of that stupid train, you’d eventually come around to my way of thinking.”
She jumped down and jogged back toward the front of the bus. “We have a driver. You hired a driver?”
I assumed that was a joyful rhetorical question at this point, so I grinned and nodded. “Wait until you see the inside.”
“But—”
I held up a hand. I already knew where she was going. “Fee, stop. I have a stupid amount of money, but beyond that, this will make you happy and, more importantly, us happy. Because if I had to cram myself into another sleeper car, I was going to—”
She launched herself at me one more time. The woman was going to put me in traction, but it was worth it.
“Nope. Perfect. I don’t care how much it cost.” Her dark hair curtained around us. “I don’t even care that you did it without telling me. I know it will be perfect. You know exactly what I like.”
I grinned up at her. “I certainly do.”
She pulled my hair. “Not about that, jerk. Though you are rather perfect in that regard.”
