“Okay, love you.’’
“Love you more. See you in a few days.’’
“Bye, Mum,’’ I smile, excited it’s all happening.
She disconnects and I open the door, ready to grab the key to the next step in my life. I just hope Max will be as happy as I am.
CHAPTER THIRTY ONE
MAX
“I’m going out. Clean your fucking shit up before we get back,’’ Myles snaps, grabbing Kayla’s hand.
I scratch my balls, ignoring them. They’ve been on my case for the past two days and I’m sick of it. Literally. I’m literally fucking sick of it.
I’ve had a hangover since my binge drinking at MC5 four days ago. I didn’t even make it outside MC5 before I started puking my guts up. You’d think after all the puking I did I wouldn’t have anything left to throw up. Wrong.
Today is the first day I haven’t thrown up and I’m relishing in the moment. It’s why I’m currently sprawled out on the couch wearing only my boxers, a blanket kicked down at my feet and junk food wrappers littered around me. I’ve also got a week’s worth of cups surrounding me, some with tea in, some with soup. I guess walking into the kitchen was hard enough, I didn’t want to add to the strain by carrying a mug along with me too.
“Whatever,’’ I tell him, throwing a pillow at his retreating back. The front door slams and I relax back down on the sofa, turning the volume up on The Lucky One and shoving some stale crisps into my mouth.
Don’t judge.
When a bloke gets dumped they automatically think we’re wired to move on, not wallow or have feelings and shit. They just hand you a beer and tell you to move on, find another pussy.
With chicks, it’s different. They get you burning pictures of you together, get you to throw out anything that belongs to your ex and will list a million reasons why you’re better off without them and let you have a cry fest. Then they hand you a glass of wine, a box of chocolates and a collection of cheesy romance movies.
I’m not wired that way.
I passed on the wine but I did drink myself stupid on chicken soup. I’ve eaten my body weight in chocolate and other junk foods, which probably didn’t help my queasy stomach. I never had any pictures of me and Lake printed off so I made up some sob story to Kayla and had her go into town and get me some. She did and when I started burning them it ended badly. I should have Googled that shit because I ended up burning a hole in the carpet. Mav and Myles were not impressed at all.
I never had anything that belonged to her, so unfortunately I had to pass on that part of the moving on ritual. Kayla seemed unimpressed but sympathetic when I had her up most of the night crying about Lake, then I’d get angry and then I’d end up crying all over again. It was an emotional experience. One that ended with me getting an earful off Myles and having Kayla, my rock, taken away from me.
Now I’m onto the last stage. The movie fest stage. I decided it was safer to Google it this time, since the burning fiasco with the pictures. I started off heavy, going in strong like a soldier, and watched The Notebook.
Somehow Joan sensed I needed her and we cried together as we watched the movie. I passed out not long after the two old people died in each other’s arms. The heaviness weighing on my heart became too much and I couldn’t cope. The movie was just too much for my heart to handle.
Joan then wrote me a list of recommendations. I’ve also watched Titanic, Safe Haven, Pretty Woman and Twilight. I’ve still got Dirty Dancing, John Tucker Must Die and The Breakup left to watch. I’m still trying to get the rest of the movies on the list but I’m good with what I’ve got for now. It’s really helping me get through my breakup with Lake. Kind of.
A message alert beeps from my phone and I begrudgingly grab it, looking down at the text message from Myles.
Myles: And take a fucking shower, you stink.
“I don’t fucking stink,’’ I grumble, frowning. Bending a little I sniff my pits and gag at the odour lingering there. “Well, shit, I stink.’’
Getting up, wrappers, DVD cases and the remote fall to the floor in a heap. I don’t bother picking them up as I bypass all the shit lying around. I’ve literally been sleeping on the couch as my bed still smells of Lake. I couldn’t stomach the thought of it not smelling like her again, so I left it alone. Joan went to change my sheets and I hit the roof. Thankfully, she hasn’t been back in my room since. Not that I would know anyway. I’ve pretty much ignored anyone who walked through the front door.
Twisting the shower on, I don’t bother waiting for it to heat up before I strip myself of my boxers, my new, very expensive boxers and step in. The cold water hitting me is the wakeup call I needed. I can’t keep wallowing in my own self pity.
She left and isn’t coming back.
Well, not until I get off my lazy backside and tell her I’m sorry. Tell her I fucked up and didn’t mean to push her away.
Fuck! Who am I kidding? I can’t even build up the courage to even send her a text message, let alone turn up at her doorstep and tell her I’m sorry. Then there’s the fact I couldn’t ask her to leave her family. It’s been a fighting battle in my mind since Maverick told me to make it right. At least, I’m sure that’s what he said; that day is still a blur. The only thing that comes to mind when I think of that day is Cher’s, I Got You Babe.
The only other option is for me to move over by her house which means leaving my family behind. Anyone else I couldn’t care less about, but my family… my family is all I’ve got and I love them. There’s never been a time in my life when I’ve thought about leaving them or moving out of town, no matter how bad life got. We’ve always stuck together and the thought of being without them and moving hours away turns my stomach.
Some may say I sound like a baby, that one day I’ll have to grow my own roots, cut the cord, but when you have a family like mine, they are my roots. We are all equal, always there for each other through the bad and the good. We’ve never needed space away from each other, even when we argued back and forth. It’s always been this way and if I left it would ruin the dynamic of what we have. It’s more than just a brother’s bond. Plus, they’d miss me. There’s only one Max Carter.
The doorbell ringing makes me groan. Cutting my relaxing shower short, I quickly rinse the soap from off my body before stepping out and pulling on a pair of boxers which cling to my wet body. Not bothering with a towel, I run down the stairs, opening the door.
My breath leaves my lungs.
Lake!
It’s really fucking Lake. Well, the back of Lake.
I rub my eyes, praying my hangover isn’t making me delusional. She was walking away from the house but once she hears my intake of breath, her body spins around, her eyes widening when she sees me.
The heavy pressure that’s been weighing down on my chest begins to lighten now that I have her in front of me. She’s really here.
She’s wearing a leather jacket, blue skinny jeans, with leather boots. She has a small black bag with a gold chain attached to it, along with gold jewellery adding to her look. She looks completely different and something tells me I’m finally seeing the real Lake for the first time. Even her hair is different. Usually she’d leave it down, wild, or throw it up in a bun, but I can tell she’s made an effort, straightening her hair, but curling the ends into a loose wave. It looks longer, healthier, along with her appearance. She’s wearing makeup, but not much, just some eyeliner I think as her eyes look darker.
“Hey,’’ she whispers, causing me to jump and my body to break out in goosebumps. Fuck! She only said one word and already she has my body reacting to her.
“Hey,’’ I choke out then cough, clearing my throat.
“So,’’ she says quietly, rocking back and forth on her heels. “Nice boxers,’’ she comments, eyeing the new, expensive boxers.
I give her a dry look, not impressed with her sense of humour. “Thanks, seems I’ve got bowel problems and according to Myles and Mason, I need to be potty trained again.’’
> She giggles, her face relaxing and looking carefree. It doesn’t last long and before I know it her expression sobers, turning serious. “Can we talk?’’
Furiously, I nod my head. “Yeah, um, come in. Come in,’’ I offer, feeling like a bigger dick for not inviting her in sooner.
We walk into the front room and I watch Lake look around the room with wide eyes, looking disgusted. It’s like I’m seeing the room through her eyes and I cringe at the mess.
“Myles,’’ I scoff. “He’s disgusting,’’ I mutter, sounding disappointed in my twin brother.
“Myles made this mess?’’ she asks incredulously.
“Well, yeah. Who did you think made the mess? He’s had…. His… um… His goldfish died,’’ I lie, feeling proud that I come up with such a brilliant excuse.
“Oh, I didn’t know he had a goldfish,’’ she tells me, her lips twitching.
“Yeah, he doesn’t like to show him off. He wasn’t gold like normal goldfish and Myles didn’t want him to feel like less of a fish.’’
“Less of a fish?’’ she asks, her luscious lips twitching.
“Yeah, less of a fish. You know Myles, he doesn’t like seeing anyone being bullied,’’ I remind her, rolling my eyes. “The other fish were really mean to him.’’
“Okayyy,’’ she says slowly and I’m hoping by the small smirk playing on her lips that she believes me.
“Here. Have a seat.’’ I move over to the sofa, cursing when I have to move piles of crap from the sofa. I’m surprised we don’t have rats. I’m actually feeling kind of ashamed. Just a little.
She gingerly sits on the sofa, mindful of the mess on the floor and around her. When I notice her hand disappearing down the side of the sofa, my eyes widen and I dive forward, snatching the object she retrieves before she can see it. But it’s too late. Her eyes narrow before they light up. Looking up at me with soft eyes, she smiles.
“I guess that picture of me and you is Myles’ too?’’
I cough, clearing my throat. “Sick prick. I’ll have words with him,’’ I grumble, folding the picture up and hiding it away in my back pocket. “He can’t go anywhere without having a picture of me.’’
Out of sight, out of mind.
“Of course,’’ she nods looking clearly amused.
Neither of us speak and the silence is awkward and uncomfortable. We’ve never had problems before now filling in the silence or having something to talk about. It doesn’t feel right.
“How come you’re back?’’ I ask. I’ve been wondering ‘why’ since the moment I opened the front door. Is she here to stay or is this some trick so she can ruin my boxers all over again? My heart can’t take her leaving, especially since I admitted to myself as well as Mav how deep my feelings for Lake run. And there’s the fact I can’t afford anymore boxers.
“We’re moving here,’’ she tells me, her eyes shining. She looks happy, really happy, and I don’t think I’ve ever seen her look so content, so peaceful and overjoyed before. Her admission registers and I sit forward in the armchair, shocked.
“What? Can you repeat that?’’
“We’re moving here,’’ she chuckles, a light blush pinking her cheeks.
“Let me get this right, you’re moving here, to Coldenshire?’’
“Yes, here. Five minutes around the corner to be exact.’’
“No shit?’’ I can’t wrap my head around it. “Why? How? What about your parents, I don’t understand,’’ I rush out, pulling at the ends of my hair. I even pinch my arm just to make sure I’m not dreaming again. When I don’t wake up and a red mark appears on my arm, I know this is real. Unless she’s playing some sick joke on me, of course.
“Mum and Dad didn’t want me to be unhappy. We’re all moving here. Cowen, Marybeth and I drove down early so that they could sort out the moving arrangements and so I could come back to make things right with everyone.’’
“Why would you need to make things right?’’ I swallow, feeling my chest tighten.
“For leaving when I knew I belonged here,’’ she says surely. That weight in my chest lightens some more and I have to take in a deep breath.
“But I was cruel?’’ I whisper, ashamed at my behaviour towards her. I acted out of fear and I shouldn’t have. I won’t lie and tell you the thought of her leaving didn’t cross my mind, but as the days passed and her parents made no move to leave, I guess I made myself push it all aside, hoping everything would turn out okay and she wouldn’t need to leave.
“Yeah, you were, Max,’’ she whispers, her voice pained.
“I’m sorry, Lake. So fucking sorry. I’ve replayed that evening over and over in my head and every single time I would change the outcome, change my reaction. I was scared and I acted out of fear when I shouldn’t have. It was a dick move to speak to you like that, especially in front of everyone. I love you. I love you so fucking much that it literally scared me stupid that I acted like a complete prick to you. I wouldn’t blame you if you never forgive me or if you’re here to warn me to stay away from you,’’ I ramble. I’m rambling that much that I didn’t even notice Lake stand, looking like a lion after his prey.
“Say it again,’’ she whispers.
“Huh? I don’t think I can remember what I just said word for word but I’ll have a go,’’ I rush out to reassure her. “I’m sorry…’’
“No. Not that. The way you feel,’’ she whispers, stepping closer. Feeling vulnerable sitting down with Lake prowling towards me, I stand up, getting ready for the slap across the cheek that I’ve been waiting for since she arrived. I deserve a few for my actions.
But then my mind goes over everything I said and my eyes dilate when I realise what she wants me to repeat, what I let slip. Sweating with nerves, I step forward, smirking when I notice Lake’s body shudder and watch her eyes fill with desire.
Moving forward a step, so that I’m standing closer to her, our bodies barely touching, but close enough so that when she takes in a heavy breath and her chest swells, her chest brushes across my bare chest. It feels good, and my dick jumps to attention in my boxers.
Leaning down so that my lips are level with hers, I lightly brush a kiss across her lips before moving back a breath. Her eyes close, her breathing heavy and I smirk.
“I love you, Lake Miller,’’ I whisper, putting everything I am into those five words, hoping she can feel how much I mean every single one of them.
Her eyes slowly lift open and the desire, lust and sexual want is written all over her face. She wants me. And by the way her body noticeably trembles when I run my finger down her neck before palming my hand over her heart; I can tell she’s holding on by a thread.
“I love you, Lake Miller,’’ I repeat, bending down to run my lips across hers.
Her body moves like lightning and before I know it she’s wrapped around me, her legs around my waist and her arms around my neck. Her lips crash to mine and I groan the second I taste her in my mouth. Fuck! I’ve missed this. Missed her.
“Let’s just forget it happened,’’ she whispers against my mouth, rubbing her core against my stomach.
My nose crinkles, something Malik was telling me not so long ago coming to my mind. “Do you really mean that you’ll forget it, or is this some sort of trick and really you’re just waiting to strike?’’
She pulls back, sighing. “Yes, I really mean to forget it, okay?’’
“I’m puzzled. You used ‘okay’ in the same sentence and I’m pretty sure when a woman says it’s okay, it’s seriously not okay.’’
“Jesus, Max. Can we just back to get back to what we were doing?’’
“But, we’re good?’’
“Yeah, whatever,’’ she sighs loudly, not looking impressed at the sudden change of mood.
“Now I know you’re still pissed at me. Malik said, Mason told him that when a woman says, ‘whatever,’ it’s really them giving you the middle finger.’’
“For fuck’s sake, Max, since when do yo
u listen to anything your brothers tell you? At one point or another, one of them has done something to you. I can name a few. Mason spiked your drink with laxative, Malik crumbled Viagra in your dinner and I’m not even going to go there with Myles turning you blue. Your pubic hair was still blue a week later,’’ she reminds me, looking pissed.
Christ, I don’t win.
“You have a really good point,’’ I point out, mulling it over in my mind.
“I do. Now kiss me and take me to bed before I walk out that door and never talk to you again.’’
“No need to be mean,’’ I comment before slamming my lips to hers. I squeeze her ass in my hands tightly, loving how good it feels. I stumble towards the stairs, nearly tripping over the leftover takeaway boxes.
Lake pulls away, grinning down at me. “Just out of curiosity, what was Myles’ fish called?’’
She got me. My mind is too focused on getting in her pants to even think of a name. “Shut up,’’ I smirk before claiming her lips once again.
The door to my room doesn’t even close before we’re ripping each other’s clothes off. Our desperation for each other is making everything feel more erotic. Each touch, each caress, and each taste of her skin makes the sparks between us intensify, blowing my mind as well as Lake’s.
The second her orgasm explodes around my dick, I release myself inside her. I’ve never cum so hard before, it’s never been that intense, but to be fair, it makes sense. I’ve never had sex with someone I’ve loved before. It’s just more proof of how much we belong together. I’ve slept with so many girls, and a few older women, but none, and I mean, not even one, comes close to how good it feels when I’m with Lake. I reckon just kissing her could get me off.
Breathing heavily, I roll us so we’re facing each other. My hand reaches out, moving the hair covering Lake’s face and chuckle at her flushed face.
“You’re beautiful,’’ I whisper, leaning forward and kissing her nose.
“So are you,’’ she smiles, her cheeks flushed from our activities.
“Pfttt,’’ I scoff. “I’m more of a ruggedly handsome or fit as fuck kind of lad. I am not fucking beautiful.’’
Max (A Carter Brother series Book 4) Page 41
