So where did that leave them?
* * *
Well, what a surprise. They’d ended up with their clothes off again and nothing was discussed or planned.
On the upside, she wasn’t nauseous this morning...yet.
As she headed toward the makeup trailer, her new agent Ian Schaffer stepped out of one of the cottages on the Barrington estate. Ian had initially come out to the movie set in hopes of getting Lily to sign with his agency, and she did, but then he had gone and fallen in love with one of the beautiful Barrington sisters.
Sweet Cassie, the gentle trainer, and her precious girl, Emily, were both part of Ian’s life now and family had never looked so adorable. Ian caught her eye and waved as he headed her way. At some point she’d have to discuss her own family situation with Ian and what this meant for upcoming films...especially since he was already getting several scripts for her to look over.
Too bad none of those movies called for a pukey pregnant heroine. She’d so nail that audition with her pasty complexion and random bouts of profuse sweating.
“You have a second?” he asked.
“Sure.” Lily shifted so Ian’s height blocked the morning sun. “We’re heading into town today to shoot a scene near the flower shop, but I’m not due in wardrobe for a few more minutes. What’s up?”
“I have a really good script that came through yesterday I’d like you to look at it.” Ian rested his hands on his hips and smiled. “I know we’ve only worked together for a few weeks, but you had indicated that you’d like to try something different, maybe break away from the softer, family-style roles and into something more edgy. Are you still up for that?”
Lily tilted her head and shrugged. “Depends on the role and the producer. What do you have for me?”
“How would you feel about playing a showgirl who is a struggling single mother?”
Lily froze. “Um...yeah, that’s quite the opposite of anything I’ve done before.”
Oh the irony. Showgirl? By the time the movie started filming Lily figured her waistline would be nonexistent. As far as the single mom aspect? She honestly had no clue. Nash claimed he wouldn’t leave her, but he’d only been aware of the baby for less than twenty-four hours. Once reality set in would he still feel the same?
“Lily?” Ian eased his head down until his gaze caught hers. “You all right? You don’t have to look at the script if that’s too far outside your comfort level, but I will say the producers are amazing and the script is actually very well plotted. Aiden O’Neil was just cast as the opposite lead.”
Aiden was a great guy, an awesome actor and would be a joy to work with again. But how could she accept this role knowing she couldn’t commit to the grueling hours of exercise and perfecting her body that, no doubt, Hollywood would require in order to portray a showgirl?
Lily’s eyes drifted over Ian’s shoulder and landed on Nash. Now that was a leading man...and he’d sneaked out of her trailer without her noticing. He’d promised to be gone by morning, and he was, but still she’d been a little disappointed not to be able to wake up next to him. Yes, she was quickly losing control over her feelings for Nash and she feared she’d have a hard time keeping them tucked against her heart.
Ian swiveled, glanced across the estate and turned back to Lily. “I’m not sure why you keep hiding what you two have going on.”
Lily jerked her attention back to Ian. “Excuse me?”
Shrugging, Ian smiled. “I won’t say anything, and honestly I doubt anyone else has picked up on the vibes you two are sending out.”
Lily wasn’t sure if she was relieved or afraid that someone else knew about her and Nash. Old images of a video she’d thought private played through her mind. That was another time, another man. Nash was trustworthy...wasn’t he?
“What is it you think you know?” she asked, crossing her arms over her chest.
“I caught you two in a rather...comfortable embrace about a month ago. I was looking for Cassie and you and Nash were in the stables. I didn’t say anything because I know you value your privacy and it was nobody’s business what you two do in your downtime.”
Lily had thought for sure no one would’ve spotted them at night and after hours. Thankfully it was only Ian who most definitely had her best interest at heart. As her agent, he didn’t want any bad press surrounding her, either. The limelight would stay directed elsewhere, for now.
Blowing out a sigh, Lily nodded. “I don’t know what is going on between Nash and me, to be honest. But just keep this between us, okay?”
Ian smiled. “You’re my client, and I’d like to think, friend. We all have secrets, Lily. I won’t say a word.”
Speaking of secrets, she had a doozy. But for now, she would keep the pregnancy to herself. This was definitely something she and Nash needed to work through before sharing the announcement with any outsiders. They were still riding the sexual high, the excitement of being so physically attracted to each other, she had no clue how to discuss something so permanent with him. They were facing a relationship she didn’t think either of them was ready for.
“You sure you’re okay?” Ian asked.
Pulling out her most convincing smile, Lily nodded and turned to head toward the wardrobe trailer. “Fine. Just ready to relax after this shoot is over.”
“Well, when you get a chance, come find me. I’ll let you look over those scripts.” He fell into step with her. “I believe the single mom part would be perfect for you, but that’s going to depend on how comfortable you are with playing a showgirl. I also have a part that is set in a mythical world, and that also involves bearing a great deal of skin because from what I can see, the women all wear bikini tops and short skirts.”
Lily refrained from groaning because here she was, just discovering her pregnancy and already having to choose between her career and her personal life.
How would she juggle this all when the baby came? Eventually the world would know she was pregnant, then she couldn’t keep Nash a secret any longer—couldn’t keep her feelings for him a secret. Sooner rather than later, their relationship—whatever it became—would be out front and center.
How would he cope? How would they get through this? As a couple? As two people just sharing a child? With the depth of her feelings only growing stronger, Lily worried she was in for a long road of heartache.
Three
It was after midnight and Lily hadn’t come to him. He’d spent the night in her trailer, in her arms. So why wasn’t she here?
Turning off the lights in the stables, Nash kept to the shadows of the property and headed toward the back of the estate where Lily’s trailer sat. He told himself he just wanted to check on her to make sure she was feeling okay. Nash refused to believe he was developing deeper feelings for her. He couldn’t afford to be sidetracked right now, not until his plan was fully executed.
He climbed the two steps and glanced over his shoulder to double-check he was alone before giving her door a couple taps with his knuckles. When she didn’t answer, he tried the handle, surprised it turned easily beneath his palm. Even with security, keeping the door unlocked wasn’t smart. You never knew what length the crazies would go to in order to snap a picture of a celebrity. Money held more power than people gave it credit for.
“You need to keep this locked,” he told her as he entered. “Anybody could walk right in.”
Lily sat hunched over the small dinette table, papers spread all around her. When she glanced up at him, tear tracks marred her creamy cheeks.
Fear gripped him as he crossed the small space. “Lily, what happened? Is it the baby?”
Raking her hands through her long, dark hair, she shook her head. “No, no. The baby is fine.”
A slight sense of relief swept through him, but still, something was wrong. He’d never seen such fierc
e emotions from the woman who always appeared so flawless, so in control...except when she surrendered herself to him and she unleashed all of that pent-up passion.
“Then what is it?” he asked, sliding in beside her on the narrow booth.
Her hand waved across the table. “All of this. I’m looking at the future of my career, yet I have no clue what way to go. I’m at a crossroads, Nash, and I’m scared. There’s no good answer.”
Nash wrapped his arm around her and pulled her against his side. He’d grown used to the perfect feel of her petite body nestled next against his. What he wasn’t used to was consoling a woman, delving into feelings beyond the superficial. This was definitely out of his comfort zone and he absolutely hated it. Hated how he’d allowed himself to get in this position of being vulnerable with the threat of being exposed before he was ready.
More than anything else, he hated lying to Lily. She didn’t deserve to be pulled into his web of deceit and lies, but now that she was pregnant, there was no other option. He’d already put his plan in motion and he wasn’t leaving until Damon Barrington gave up the horses and Nash disclosed his real identity to the man. Nash couldn’t wait to see Damon’s face when the truth was revealed.
But now he had Lily and a baby to worry about. He sure as hell didn’t want innocents caught in the mix. Things had been so simple before, when Lily planned to wrap up filming and go on her way. Everything in her life from this moment on would revolve around their child and he had to figure out a way to make this right...he just had no clue how.
Angst rolled through him at the thought of his own mother feeling even an inkling of what Lily was going through. And his mother had been all on her own. No way would he ever let Lily feel as if she didn’t have him to lean on. He wasn’t looking for that traditional family, but he wouldn’t abandon what was his.
For so long it had been just Nash and his mother. She’d always put his needs first, rarely dating, never bringing a man to the house until Nash was in his late teens when she got engaged and eventually married. She’d always made sure her two jobs covered their bills and a few extras.
In short, she worked her ass off, purposely setting her own needs aside until Nash was old enough to understand and care for himself.
He didn’t want to see Lily struggling as a single mother, juggling a career and a child.
Added to that, she was pregnant with his child. It would take death to tear him away from what belonged to him. Did he love her? No. Love wasn’t in the cards for him, wasn’t something he believed in. That didn’t mean he didn’t already love this child they’d created. Now Nash had to make sure once she discovered the truth, she wouldn’t shut him out.
He knew how she loathed liars, how she’d been betrayed by a man in her past. Surely she would see this situation was completely different.
“What are all these papers that have you so upset?” he asked her.
Lily rested a hand on his thigh, tapping a stack with her finger. “Scripts Ian gave me to look over for the next film. He’s so excited because this will be our first film together, but everything here would be impossible for me to do until after the baby is born and that’s if I get my body back. Hollywood is ruthless when it comes to added pounds.”
He kept his opinion about Hollywood and their warped sense of “beautiful” to himself. Not all women needed to be rails to be stunning and added pounds didn’t take away from a woman’s talents. Lily was a petite woman, but she had curves in all the right places.
“Why don’t you tell Ian that none of these will work for you?”
Lily lazily drew an invisible pattern over his jeans with her fingertips. “I need to tell him about the baby. This has to be my sole focus. My career will have to come second for a while. I only hope I’m not committing career suicide.”
Nash smiled and stroked away a strand of hair from her eyes. “I highly doubt this will kill your career. Ian will understand, I’m sure.”
Lily scrubbed her hands over her face. “This is my life. I don’t know anything else. What do I know about being a mom?”
About as much as he knew about being a dad.
She slid out the other side of the booth and grabbed a bottle of water from the fridge. Nash watched as she twisted off the cap and took a long drink. An overwhelming sense of possession swept through him. This sexy, vibrant woman would soon start showing visible signs of their secret affair.
“You can’t keep pushing yourself right now, Lily. It’s best you relax.”
Her eyes darted to his. “I don’t need you coming in here and telling me how I should be reacting. My life is mine alone, Nash. Yes, you’re the baby’s father, but I need to figure out what to do here. Even if I take some time off, I’m still in the spotlight. I don’t want...”
She bit her lip and glanced away. In the soft light casting a glow in the narrow space, Nash saw another fresh set of tears swimming in her eyes. Damn it.
“You don’t want the media to know,” he murmured.
After a slight hesitation, she nodded, but still didn’t meet his gaze. He climbed out of the seat and came up behind her, cupping her shoulders and easing her back against his chest.
“They’re going to find out, Lily. What you need to do is make sure you always stay in control.” Sliding his arms down, he covered her flat stomach with his hands, still in awe that a life grew inside there. “Don’t let them start the gossip. I’m sure you have TV interviews scheduled. Make a big bombshell announcement then. You’ll take the wind right out of the press’s sails.”
Lily turned in his arms. Her eyes met his as she blinked back tears. “That may be the best plan of action. But, I need to tell my mother first.”
Her mother. They’d never discussed their parents. That topic usually meant a relationship was building. He and Lily hadn’t planned on building on anything. They were enjoying their time together, not thinking of tomorrow.
Tomorrow, however, had caught up with them and smacked them in the face with a good dose of reality.
The fact they were bound forever now sent a bit of uncontrollable fear sliding through him. Whether either of them liked it or not, they were about to delve into personal territory.
Lily could talk about her mother all she wanted. That was most definitely an area in his life he wasn’t ready to reveal.
“Does your mother live in LA, too?”
“No, she lives in Arizona in a small, private community that’s run by an assisted living facility. She has her own home on the grounds and she’s very independent, but if her health gets bad or as she gets older and needs care, she’s already set.”
Lily stepped back and crossed her arms. “I don’t tell people where she is because I want her to have a normal life and not be hassled by the media.”
Nash didn’t want another reason to be drawn to Lily, but damn it she was protective of her mother. How could he not relate to that? Nash would do anything for his mother...which was why he was still harboring his secret instead of bursting through Damon’s front doors and laying it all out on the line.
Part of Nash wished he’d never kept this secret about his life, wished he’d just confronted his past immediately and moved on. But he’d wanted to protect his mother and wanted to move cautiously without making rash decisions. Lily was a different story. He’d seen her, he’d wanted her. Now, here they were, pregnant and discussing parents.
Irony shot at him from so many angles he could hardly keep up. He had been a secret baby, and Lily was expecting a baby that had to remain a secret for now. The best course of action for him would be to complete his original plans and confront Damon.
“Are you going to see your mom as soon as you’re done filming here?” he asked.
He needed her gone. He needed her away so he could have a face-to-face with Damon and not have Lily right there witnessing his co
nfession of every single lie he’d told since meeting her. There was no way he could avoid the outcome, but he could at least soften the blow if she weren’t present for the bomb he would drop.
He wanted so much, from Damon, from himself...from Lily. In the end, he would have it all. He hadn’t gotten this far in his life by sitting idly by and watching opportunities pass. He reached with both hands and took what he wanted.
“I just need to think.” She rubbed her head and sighed. “I need to find a doctor. I have no idea where to go. Obviously I should look in LA, but I won’t be back there for a while.”
“I’ll find you one.” When she quirked a brow, he added, “I know people in the area. You need a checkup and then you can see a doctor when you get home.”
Assuming she went back home after filming wrapped up. Hell, he had no idea what her plans were. Honestly, all they’d managed to work out was how well they fit together intimately. Any discussion beyond that would be a vast change of pace.
“Just get me a name,” she told him. “It’s going to be nearly impossible to get in and out of a doctor’s office here without word getting out about my condition.”
Nash’s mind was working overtime. He couldn’t say too much or she’d know something was off about him and who she believed he was. She had to keep thinking he was just a groom until he could tell her otherwise. The last thing he needed at this point was her, or anyone for that matter, getting suspicious. Still, money talked and he’d use any means necessary to get her the proper care she needed while she was here.
“I bet we could get a doctor to come here, secretly,” he offered. “People can be silenced for a price.”
Lily’s eyes widened. “You’re not paying someone to keep quiet. I know how this works, Nash. We just need to find someone who can be discreet.”
From her tone and the worry filling her eyes, Nash knew she didn’t like the idea of him spending his money on her health care. Little did she know how heavily padded his accounts were. Even if they weren’t, even if he did only make groom’s wages, he’d spend every last cent if that meant proper care for his baby.
Carrying the Lost Heir's Child Page 3
