“Maybe.” Zwaantie wasn’t going to commit to anything.
“Just don’t break his heart. I don’t care what your motives are, but he loves you.”
She nodded, not daring to lie out loud. She was disgusted with herself.
Luna wasn’t feeling good during dinner, so Zwaantie sent her home. Zwaantie worried about her. She hoped she wasn’t coming down with something bad.
After dinner, Leo walked Zwaantie to her room, and Hunter miraculously disappeared. She’d never seen Leo without him. He followed her into her room, as if that was okay.
He sprawled out on her bed and looked at Zwaantie expectantly.
“It will be gray soon,” she said. She didn’t want him in her room after midnight. Who knew what would happen. Nothing good, that’s for sure. Phoenix had been a gentleman. Leo was not.
“We have time,” he said drowsily. “Come here.”
Don’t listen to him. Get him out of your room.
She sat tentatively on the edge of the bed, and pain flashed across her forehead.
You are playing with danger.
“Would you relax?” he asked.
“You are in my room with me alone and are on my bed. Not exactly relaxing for me.” Especially with the Voice reminding her how dangerous it was.
“I’m have no intention of taking advantage of you tonight. I just want to talk. And those chairs of yours are bloody uncomfortable. I won’t even touch you, but lay here with me and talk. And take that stupid dress off.”
“I thought you said you weren’t going to do anything to me, yet here you are trying to get me to take my clothes off.”
She gave him a smile to show she was joking and felt instantly guilty. She shouldn’t enjoy her time with him. He was a road to Phoenix. That was all.
“Put something else on then. Something comfortable.”
Zwaantie escaped behind her dressing screen. But try as she might, she couldn’t get the laces on the back of her dress undone.
“Leo, can you help me?”
He nearly fell out of the bed trying to get to her. Probably thought she had less on.
“I can’t get the laces. Can you?”
He undid the laces, lingering at the bottom of her spine. His fingers were soft and gentle. “Anything else?” he asked, his voice gruff.
“No, I think I got it.”
Zwaantie put on a nightgown, which was just as modest as her dress but more comfortable. She lay down on the edge of her bed. Far enough away that he couldn’t touch her, but close enough to talk.
“What do the stars look like?” she asked.
He smiled, and it was a nice smile. “Millions of tiny lights scattered across the navy blue sky. I miss them. It’s so bright here all the time. The stars are harder to see in the cities, but out on the ocean you can see them all.”
“I think that is what I am most looking forward to. Seeing the stars. Isn’t it scary in the dark?”
He laughed. “It’s never completely dark in Stella. I mean, we have no sun, but that doesn’t mean we have a shortage of light. Sometimes it’s brighter there than here. But our lights are different colors.”
“How?” Zwaantie asked. The idea of brightness in Stella surprised her.
“Magic. I’ll show you sometime how they do it. It’s pretty amazing.”
They talked for a while about Stella and all the things he would show her.
The midnight hour comes. Get him out.
“It’s nearly midnight. You should go.”
He sighed. “Why?”
“Because you can’t be in here after midnight. We might do something we’d regret.”
“We are going to be married. How much could we regret?”
Zwaantie shook her head. “You need to go. Now.”
He sat up. “Okay, I’ll go, but under one condition.”
“And what’s that?”
“On Saturday night, the night of the dance, I want you to wear one of the dresses I brought you.”
Zwaantie almost argued with him, but midnight was approaching quickly.
“Okay. I’ll wear one. But I get to pick.”
“Excellent.”
He kissed her on the lips and disappeared. The Voice didn’t say anything. It must’ve been chaste enough.
She waited for about ten minutes and then heard her lock click. Locked in for the night.
The Voice in her head cleared with the midnight hour, and she wondered why she didn’t want to wear the dresses. She pulled out the trunk and opened it. Each dress was had more than one color. She didn’t realize that dresses could be that beautiful. In Sol, the clothes only contained one solid color. They may have adornments and things, but the color was always solid.
The first dress she pulled out was a red dress with no sleeves that had a long black ruffled train. She jerked off her nightgown and pulled the dress on. It fit perfectly. Almost too small and it pushed her breasts up. The dress made her feel alive.
She twirled around and giggled. Then she stripped it off and tried on another. Before collapsing into bed, she tried on all of the dresses and picked the one she would wear to the dance.
The dress was a deep black dress with bright blue jewels. It was the dress Mother would hate the worst. No sleeves and way, way too short.
Chapter 26
The Dance
The evening of the dance, butterflies fluttered in Zwaantie’s belly. She and Luna had spent most of the day packing Zwaantie’s things because they would leave for Stella in the morning.
Zwaantie pulled out the dress. The material flowed through her fingers.
“That’s a little short. And revealing. Are you sure your mother will be okay with that?” Luna asked with raised eyebrows.
“I’m not wearing it for her.”
Filthy. You know better. Put the dress back in the trunk and put on one of your own dresses. NOW.
The dress fit well. Zwaantie gave Luna the shoes she had found in the trunk. They had high heels and tiny blue jewels on the toes. They pinched her toes.
Slut. That’s what you are. Take the dress off and put on something decent.
A small headache appeared behind her eyes. She didn’t want to be in pain the whole evening, but she wanted to wear this dress.
Zwaantie tried to push the thoughts away. Guilt gnawed at her insides, and her headache grew. On her bedside table sat the necklace Leo had presented to her when he arrived. She’d never worn it, thinking it was stupid to need protection because the Voice kept everyone from committing crimes.
Now though, she needed it. Someone was trying to kill her. She wished she’d thought of this earlier. She put it on, and her headache disappeared. A knock sounded at the door, and Luna answered it.
“I don’t think this is a good time. Zwaantie is getting ready.”
“I don’t care. I need to talk to my sister before she leaves.” Raaf pushed his way into the room, followed by his new slave. Zwaantie’s heart clenched at the site of him. It should’ve been Phoenix.
“What are you wearing?” Raaf asked and quickly averted his eyes. His slave wasn’t quite as discreet. His mouth dropped open. Zwaantie gave him a wink.
“A dress. From Stella. Why don’t you sit?”
Raaf shook his head, still not looking directly at her. “Mother is not going to let you wear that.”
“By the time Mother sees the dress, it will be too late. What did you want to talk about? We have a dance to attend.”
Raaf sat, meeting her eyes. He creased his eyebrows and pulled her hands into his own. He’d never been so affectionate before. “Are you going to be okay in Stella? I can get you out of this marriage if you want. You don’t seem happy with Leo.”
Zwaantie gave him a sad smile. If he only knew. “Of course this is what I want. When have I ever done anything that I haven’t wanted to?”
“I know. But I just want to make sure you’ll be okay. Do you need anything from me? We probably won’t get to talk much before you leave.”<
br />
Zwaantie hugged him. “I’ll miss you too, baby brother, but I’ll be fine. Besides, it’s only for a year. Then I’ll be queen. That’s a scary thought.”
He grimaced. “Yeah, it is. Can I escort you to the dance? I won’t be able to do that after you are married.”
She almost invited him to come with on the tour of Stella, but then remembered that she wouldn’t be coming back because she and Phoenix would run away once he had his bands removed. And that made her sad.
Zwaantie entered the grand hall, and her breath caught in her throat. Normally, banners of the sun and bright colors covered the room, but today half of the banners had been replaced with stars and a moon. They stood out in such stark contrast to the bright sun. It was gorgeous.
“I can’t believe you’re joining Stella and Sol. This is historical,” Raaf said.
Zwaantie didn’t want to be historical. She wanted to be normal. But she’d do this for Phoenix. Even if they couldn’t run away, she had to get him out of the sewers. She would marry Leo if that meant Phoenix could be free.
She searched for her parents. They stood on the opposite side of the hall deep in conversation with the lower king of Sonnenschein. Standing next to them was Leo. He wore light pants made of a shimmery silver material and no shirt. But he wore an open vest that matched her dress. His eyes met hers.
Zwaantie and Raaf approached their parents, and Leo slipped his arm around Zwaantie’s waist and pulled her close to him.
“You look amazing,” he whispered. “I take back everything I ever thought about you.”
Zwaantie’s mother turned and looked at her. Her face twisted into a combination of horror and revulsion. In a matter of seconds, Zwaantie could see a thousand different emotions cross her face.
Her mouth opened. Zwaantie was about to have it.
“What do you think of the dress my sisters sent for Zwaantie?” Leo said. “Doesn’t she look gorgeous?”
Zwaantie’s mother recovered and looked at Leo. Cleary, she’d forgotten he was there. Zwaantie could see her fingers trembling, but she was never one to be rude. “Of course, but I think perhaps she should find something to cover her shoulders.”
Leo didn’t respond but swept Zwaantie out onto the dance floor. He pulled her close and led her in a dance she was unfamiliar with. In Sol, they didn’t touch much when they danced and never like the embrace he had Zwaantie in. But between the choice of facing her mother and dancing close to Leo, Zwaantie chose Leo. Though she felt guilty for enjoying it. She should be thinking of Phoenix. Not Leo.
They danced all night long. Occasionally they would dance the traditional Sol dances, but mostly he held her, and she was bothered that she enjoyed his touch. She fit nicely in the prince’s arms. She noticed the Voice was silent. Strange, it never missed an opportunity to berate her.
That night he walked her to her room about eleven thirty. She was sorry to see the night end. She’d had a good time and found that she was altogether too comfortable with Leo. In another life, she’d marry him and be happy. But her heart belonged with Phoenix.
“I’m excited to bring you home. I think you’ll like Stella. And you’ll love Sage, my sister.”
He kissed Zwaantie again, long this time, and her insides tickled. It was sweet, but she couldn’t see herself marrying him. But she could see herself being his friend. Although after she betrayed him, she doubted he’d be interested in any kind of friendship.
Chapter 27
The Complication
Mother stood next to Zwaantie on the steps as several slaves packed the carriages. There were a few trunks with dresses and personal items, but most of what they brought was food.
Mother frowned at the slaves. “He’s taking so many.”
Zwaantie shrugged. “He felt I was worth it.” She was studying all the slaves. She needed to find Phoenix. He had to be among them. There he was standing near the back, filthy but with a wide smile. His eyes were on her. She smiled back, her insides warming. She was so very close.
Mother followed Zwaantie’s line of sight. She gasped and gripped Zwaantie’s arm.
“Did you agree to marry the prince so you could get Phoenix? Do you think you’ll just run away with him in Stella? Oh, I was such a fool. No wonder you wanted to marry a Stellan.”
Zwaantie kept her face straight. She could not give anything away. “No. Mother, that won’t be possible, but at least he won’t be in the sewers anymore.”
Mother pulled her close and whispered fiercely in her ear. “You better be telling the truth, because my reach is farther than you think. If you don’t marry the prince, I will find you, and I will make sure Phoenix dies. And you will watch. Do you understand? You could start a war if you backpedal on this wedding. Why did you think we discouraged it from the beginning?”
“Is everything okay?” Leo asked, causing Zwaantie to jump.
Mother jerked back and gave Leo a sugary sweet smile. “Of course, dear. Zwaantie and I have never been apart. I’m going to miss her so much.”
Zwaantie shook out of her mother’s grasp and took a few steps down to meet Leo.
“Goodbye, Mother. We’ll see you at the wedding.”
Mother nodded but didn’t say anything more.
“Are you sure you’re okay?” Leo asked Zwaantie.
“I’m fine.” Her heart raced, but she couldn’t tell Leo why she was upset. She hoped she’d be able to get away from Leo before her Mother tried anything.
Luna approached with tears on her face.
“What’s the matter?” Zwaantie asked.
“Why is Pieter not among the freed slaves?” Luna asked.
“I was not successful in obtaining the king’s slave,” Leo replied. “That’s your husband, right? We do need to get going, or we’ll never make it before midnight. Here, your midnight hours are relatively safe. In Stella, they are dangerous, so we must go?”
Zwaantie drew her best friend into a hug. “You can stay here. You don’t have to go with me.”
Luna gripped the back of Zwaantie’s dress and held her close. Then she pulled away, wiping at her eyes.
“We prepared for this possibility. I’ll come back to him after, well, after a while. I need to go with you.”
“I’m sorry,” Zwaantie whispered. “You should go say goodbye to him. Father won’t begrudge you for that.”
Chapter 28
The Betrayer
The horseless carriage was amazing. The seats were wide and comfortable. Soft music played from above Zwaantie’s head, and the whole inside was lit in a silvery blue. Leo sat close and put his arm around her. She leaned into him feeling guilty for enjoying it. Again, she waited for the Voice, but it never came. Weird.
Hunter flung himself down on one of the wide seats. “I will be so glad to get home, where things are normal again. No offense, Zwaantie, but Sol is the most uncomfortable place I’ve ever been. Plus, I miss my wife. She’s going to kill you, Leo.”
He raised his eyebrows. “Why?”
“You told Candace this would only take a day or two. It’s been a week. She’s due any day now. If our baby was born while we dawdled here, she will be one unhappy mama.”
Leo laughed. “I’m sure I can handle it. Candace has been mad at me before. I thought our timing was pretty swift actually.”
Hunter grunted. “Whatever.”
Hunter was not a slave, but the way he talked to Leo, it was like he was his friend, his equal. Luna was curt with her sometimes, but they’d been friends before, so Zwaantie allowed it. It gotten worse since Phoenix, but then Luna was his sister. Phoenix. He would be free in less than twelve hours, and then they could get married. The excitement was almost too much for her.
She was excited for more reasons than one. When she and Phoenix ran away, she’d have something she’d never had before. Freedom. No responsibility. No nagging that she was doing something dishonorable.
The wall came into view, black and ominous. They rode along the road next to the wal
l for about thirty minutes. Then they stopped abruptly.
“They’ll need to hook the carriages to the chains and give instructions to those who are walking how to get across the wall,” Leo said, climbing out of the carriage. Zwaantie and the rest followed.
She peered around him to the waiting slaves. “How will they get across?”
“They’ll hold to the Rod of Lost Memories. It spans the width of the wall. As long as they don’t let go, they’ll be fine. But there’s more to crossing the wall than just walking across it.”
“What do you mean?”
“The wall demands payment. It will take a memory. Whatever you are thinking about when you cross the wall is a memory you will no longer have on the other side.”
“So if I think of something bad, I won’t have to remember it anymore?”
“Exactly. But it’s best to do something unimportant. Bad memories usually have too many other things attached them that don’t make sense if you lose the memory. Choose carefully. You also will not remember anything that happens on the journey. It takes about a half hour by carriage. Two hours by walking.”
Zwaantie tried to think of something. “And I won’t remember the trip or what I was thinking of?”
“Nope. So make sure it is something you can live without. I need to go talk to Hunter. I’ll be right back.”
Zwaantie stared at the black mist. She crept around the carriage and stood as close as she dared to the wall. The tendrils whispered to her again, but she didn’t have the Voice encouraging her to plunge into the wall’s depths.
Zwaantie felt a hand on hers. She looked back and found herself face-to-face with Phoenix. They were alone, hidden behind the carriage. Her stomach buzzed.
“You did it,” he said.
She beamed at him and placed a palm on his cheek. “I did. A few more hours, and this will be over.”
He pulled her close, and she looked at him, surprised.
“Isn’t the Voice telling you off?” she asked.
He whispered into her ear. “The Voice is strangely quiet. Maybe I’m too close to the wall.”
That didn’t seem right. The last time she was this close to the wall, the Voice was louder than ever. It was quiet now, but she suspected that had to do with the necklace Leo gave her.
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