by Lou Cameron
She did. He found her trying to sob herself to sleep in her own hut. She brightened as he got undressed to re-join her. She said, ‘I was so afraid you would spend the whole night with your other woman, querido.’
He took her in his arms again and told her to banish the thought. But he was going to have to level a little with at least one of them, so as he felt the delightfully different mestiza up he warned her, ‘You were right about Teresa being jealous. You see, she feels she saw me first.’
Emesta grabbed his organ-grinder and gave it a good crank as she giggled and said, ‘I don’t blame her. You fuck so good. But you told her I must be allowed to share this, no?’
‘Uh, not exactly. Like I said, she’s sort of unreasonable. So I think we’d better let her think she’s my favorite for now.’
‘But, Dick, how could that be? This is the second time you have come to me for loving, no?’
‘I said she was sort of unreasonable. What if we just let her go on thinking whatever she likes?’
The more pragmatic camp follower laughed and said, ‘As long as you give me plenty of this, I do not care what she thinks. It does not feel as if she got her fair share just now, by the way. How many times did you fuck her tonight?’
‘Hey, let’s not gossip about other people, Emesta. Did I or did I not save enough for everybody?’
She lay back, spreading her tawny thighs in welcome, to reply, ‘I do not know. Suppose you show me.’
So he did, and it was easy to convince her that she was getting more than her fair share, which was true, in a way. But if Teresa was satisfied with one old-fashioned donging, was that his fault? He still had plenty to give Emesta, thanks in part to the renewed inspiration their contrasting bodies offered a man. Just thinking about Teresa’s pale, slim body as he moved in and out of the short brown Emesta made him hot. He’d noticed while he’d been laying Teresa that fond memories of perky brown breasts and a love box that gripped differently did a lot for his libido as well. So, if only he could stay alive before he got tired of either of them, he had this particular problem licked. But he told Emesta not to talk about him licking her until all three of them had had a bath.
Captain Gringo wasn’t the only one who’d spent an enjoyable night. So the next morning, as they broke fast together in a moment of privacy amid the confusion of the guerrilla camp, Gaston told him, ‘We have five to consider now, Dick. Tobasca should come in très handy on the trail, hein?’ Captain Gringo blinked and said, ‘Are we talking about that fat old cook with red hair, for God’s sake?’
Gaston grinned sheepishly and said, ‘Oui. When you are my age, you will understand that there is more to a woman than the way she spreads her legs. They all do that adorably. Mais Tobasca is a fantastic cook as well. More important, she is in charge of the rations. Need one say more?’
Captain Gringo glanced across the clearing where a fat, middle-aged mujer with moon-faced Mayan features and frizzy carrot-red hair was stirring a pot of beans, not looking their way. He repressed a shudder and said, ‘I love ladies with keys to the larder too. But do you think she’s up to much running?’
Gaston nodded and said, ‘Mais oui. Though I was first attracted to her by the smell of spicy beans, she showed amazing powers of endurance in bed. The poor thing says she has not had a man for some time.’
‘That I believe. I hope you didn’t let her in on any secrets?’
‘Mais non. Do I look like a man who was never betrayed by a slip of a kissable lip? The three swiftest means of communication known to modem man are telephone, telegraph, and tell a woman. I recall an Arab girl in Orlan who swore she loved me who—’
‘Never mind the bullshit,’ Captain Gringo cut in. ‘How do you know that fat redhead’s on our side when the time comes?’
‘Because I spent a good part of the night inside her, of course. Tobasca is not a deep thinker, and as I just told you, it has been some time since she’s had any kind of man and I, in all modesty, am some kind of man. I had her swearing eternal devotion, even before we got down to oral sex.’
‘Glugh! You went down on that old pig?’
‘It was only common courtesy, since she was going down on me, as you Americans put it so crudely. I assure you she is très clean and free of crabs. I looked. Mais forget her personal habits, since she is my true love, not yours. I shall enjoy all her charms, including extra rations, until you are ready to lead on our Macduffs. May one ask when that might be? I mean, a few more nights, perhaps a week, with such a lovely cow might be amusing enough. But between the two of us, I do not wish to make a career of Tobasca.’
Captain Gringo couldn’t blame him. The old broad was so ugly, she was almost interesting. He said, ‘We’re heading up into horse country. Verdugo wants to steal some horses. If we can steal some horses, we’ll have a better chance. It won’t matter whether the dames run good or not, and we can pack more rations.’
Gaston swallowed some coffee and said, ‘True. Mais our chances of running into both cavalry and mounted bandits go up as well, non?’
‘Can’t be helped. Verdugo’s leading us that way. So that’s the way we have to go. We’re too far from Limón for a jungle run now. Teresa would never be able to keep afoot, and there just aren’t any handy rivers running the right way.’
‘Then how do you propose we get her back to her grandfather?’
‘Easy. We swipe some horses and ride like hell for the nearest cavalry post. It’s hard as hell to murder an heiress in a cavalry post. Once we deliver her to good guys with guns, we can let them worry about it. We never signed on to bodyguard her the rest of her life.’
‘Merde alors, I don’t recall signing on at all. What is to stop this très wicked step-slut from doing the child in at some future date, Dick?’
‘Nothing, if Teresa can’t convince Don Alberto how wicked she is. But like I said, we can’t hang around forever. She knows the score. She must have her own Mends in high places. It’s not our fight. Our fight’s over once we finish rescuing her from those kidnappers.’
‘I thought we’d done that already. Don’t hit me. I understand the situation. The next time you screw her, you might ask her if she has any ranchero friends in the high country. Cavalry makes me nervous, even when I know I have not done anything to them.’
Captain Gringo nodded and said, ‘Good thinking. At the rate Verdugo’s going we might have to do something to the Costa Rican Cavalry before we can make an educated break for it.’
‘Merde alors, surely you do not intend to fire on Costa Ricans, Dick?’
‘If they’re coming at me with sabers drawn? Who are we kidding? If we punk out on Verdugo before the action gets heavy, we’ll wind up with his bullets in us. If we don’t put up a good fight for him, we’ll wind up with Costa Rican bullets in us. What do you think kept me awake half the night, for Pete’s sake?’
‘You screwed a girl named Pete too? Let us hope the matter does not come up. I will be très damned if I can see a way out either!’
Before they could discuss it further, Robles joined them to snap, ‘On your feet, cabrones! El Generale is ready for to move out, and stragglers will be shot!’
As he turned away to give others a hard time, Gaston spat and muttered, ‘Speaking of oral sex, one of us will have to take that sucker of cocks out before we leave. Do you desire the pleasure or can any number play, Dick?’
Captain Gringo remained seated and refilled his coffee cup as he growled, ‘It’s too early in the game. I think I have tacit permission to clean his plow, but it could be a test. Let’s just wait till we see how popular he is.’
They switched to idle chatter, in Spanish, as the bustle of an outfit-breaking camp closed in around them. Emesta came over to tell them the mules were loaded and ready to move out. Captain Gringo asked where Teresa was, and the peon girl replied, ‘On one of the mules, of course. She told me she felt too stiff for to walk after all the love you gave her last night.’ Emesta laughed deep in her throat and added, ‘The lying pig. I was keepi
ng count as you gave your all to me.’
Captain Gringo told her not to be mean and poured her a cup as he kept an eye on the others. The hospitality was meant not only for his loader. Robles thundered over to demand, ‘Have you wax in your ears, Yanqui? I told you to get ready to hit the trail!’
Captain Gringo nodded and said, ‘My section’s ready. Some of the others aren’t yet. Want some coffee, Major?’
Robles hissed like a snake about to strike and roared, ‘You dare to defy me, you Anglo motherfucker?’
Captain Gringo got slowly to his feet as others moved in to enjoy the show, attracted by the camp bully’s spout. Captain Gringo smiled at Robles coldly and asked, ‘Would you like to rephrase that last remark, Major? I could almost swear I heard someone refer to my mother, but it couldn’t have been you. You look like an intelligent person.’
Robles stared into the taller American’s gunmetal gray eyes as long as he could, then looked away and said, ‘As an old soldier, I speak as an old soldier. The remark was not meant to be taken as an invitation to mano a mano.’
‘I didn’t think it was. But for the record, don’t ever say that again. I told you I was ready to move out anytime. Meanwhile I’m an old soldier, too, and old soldiers don’t stand on one foot flapping their wings while they wait for people they outrank to fall in. The cooks haven’t even doused this fire yet. Are you sure you wouldn’t like some coffee?’ Before the major could answer one way or the other, they were joined by their self-styled general, who asked, ‘What the fuck are you two arguing about now, eh?’
Captain Gringo said, ‘We weren’t arguing, Generale. We had nothing worth arguing about. We were just discussing whether we had time for some more coffee. No offense, but people marching under you need lots of coffee.’
Verdugo smiled and said, ‘By the balls of Christ, that is true. We should be moving up the aprons of the highland mesas before this day is over. I want you and that Maxim closer to the head of the column from here on. Foothills make me wary. One never knows what may lie over the next rise.’
Captain Gringo nodded and asked, ‘May I make a tactical suggestion, Generale?’
Verdugo’s brows frowned, even as his mouth kept smiling. He nodded grudgingly and said, ‘If you were not an experienced officer, you would be of little use to me. What do you suggest, Captain Gringo?’
The American said, ‘Like yourself, I’ve run into a few ambushes. A machine gun has good stopping power, but it’s clumsy to run with. If we march into a setup, I’ll set up the Maxim on the spot while the rest of you fall back and—’
‘You suggest El Generale retreat! You dare!’ Robles cut in.
But Verdugo snapped, ‘Shut up. Let the man finish.’
So Captain Gringo explained, ‘You move your rifles back and form a line, belly down. If the enemy thinks you’re falling back in panic, that’s his problem. I can cover for you as you spread out and form a good defense line. If I’m still alive when you have your people dug in, I can fall back to join you. Unless the other side outnumbers us at least ten to one, they won’t have a chance of rolling over us. Once we’ve stopped their first boyish enthusiasm I’m sure the general will know what he wants to do from there.’
Verdugo thought, nodded, and said, ‘I like the part about a line of rifles firing from cover. What about you, out front in that exposed position?’
‘I’ll probably be very nervous, and it wouldn’t work if I had only a rifle to work with. The Maxim spits six hundred rounds a minute and I know how to aim it. So I add up to one small target with the fire power of a well-trained infantry squad. On top of that, most troops are rattled by machine gun fire. It’s a new weapon a lot of people aren’t familiar with. So they tend to give it credit for more than it can really do. If they flatten when I open up, I ought to be okay. If we’re talking about a really big unit of well-disciplined soldados, it was nice knowing you. But at least I should be able to slow them down for the rest of you.’
Robles asked in a pouty voice, ‘What if they have their own automatic weapons or artillery?’ So Captain Gringo said, ‘War is always a what-if. That’s why people win or lose wars, Major. Napoleon could have used a crystal ball at Waterloo. But crystal balls aren’t army issue. A soldier has to do the best he can with what he has. If the other side is smarter or has more, tough shit.’
El Generale laughed, punched his shoulder, and said, ‘Spoken like a Nicaraguan. Let us march on to liberate Nicaragua, now, eh?’
They did, and it was a long, rough day. Verdugo insisted on the same killing pace and, worse yet, since the soldiers of fortune were now near the head of the column, they had to be careful about what they said to one another, and of course, they both knew without having to say it that making a break would be even tougher now.
But as the forest floor began to steepen under them, without a break in the forest canopy above, Verdugo did call more trail breaks, and though these were short, the soldiers of fortune got a chance to know the other guerrillas better. Captain Gringo wasn’t sure he wanted to. A soldier of fortune operating in Latin America had to get used to fighting former comrades, the shifting alliances of an excitable culture being what they were. But he’d never enjoyed it. He liked most simple Hispanics, warts and all. The educated classes were much like educated people anywhere, good and bad. The peon was a simple soul, good-natured at heart, albeit with a simple view of good and bad, friend or foe. Like the American Indian so many mestizos owed part of their complexions to, peons of all complexions tended to accept a stranger as a long-lost relative or a deadly enemy bent on rape and ruin. They found the normal reserve Anglo Saxons considered polite sort of spooky. He’d found the best way to be accepted was to jump in with both feet, taking what was offered in the spirit it was offered and avoiding moral judgments. He knew that coarse humor was to be enjoyed, with a few but important limits to the comments one could make about another. You could call a peon a lazy drunken bum, and he meant no harm when he said that you were fat or farted too much. It was understood that no man who wanted to be your friend ever hinted you had a yellow streak or, God forbid, even mentioned a woman who was at all related to you unless they had been properly introduced.
Hence Captain Gringo didn’t expect anyone to mention Teresa or Emesta, and or course, nobody did. If anyone suspected Gaston had a romance going with the fat Tobasca, they kept any comments to themselves. At least the men did. Since women were not expected to kill one another when insulted, women being the weak and foolish sex, the adelitas were free to gossip a bit. But in a guerrilla band, even the women were a little macho. So nobody teased openly.
That night, as they made camp again, Teresa gained a few good marks on her report card by attempting to help the other girls, to the limits of her abilities. The tougher adelitas seemed touched by her feeble efforts. So though more than one told her gruffly to get out of the way, some smiled at her now and called her by name. An officer’s adelita who didn’t put on airs was obviously a woman of the people, and she looked pure Spanish too. Muy simpatico, no?
The two soldiers of fortune lingered longer around the leader’s campfire that evening. When Robles asked Captain Gringo in a whisper if he was trying to butter up El Generale, the American laughed and said, ‘Sure. Aren’t you?’
Robles didn’t think it was funny and moved off to sit alone and nurse his snit. Verdugo was in an expansive mood, now that he was closer to horses, or thought he was. He’d had scouts out ahead all day who hadn’t reported horses or anything else to get excited about. But Verdugo said, ‘We are making good time. All my weaklings dropped out long ago.’
Gaston thought it too good a chance to miss. So he said, ‘Eh bien, one of our party, as you know, has an injured foot. May one ask just what the rules are, should she not be able to continue?’
Verdugo frowned and said, ‘I have noticed you have one of the adelitas riding the mule I gave you for to carry the Maxim. That is your problem. I do not have another mule to spare for your section. If
the cunt is becoming a bother, shoot her and use the mule as it was intended for to be used.’
‘Could she not simply be left behind, perhaps with a few rations and a map?’
‘Do not speak childishly, my little French friend. How long could we keep these pobrecitos marching so good if word got around that stragglers were not to be shot after all?’
Captain Gringo nudged Gaston and interjected, ‘I don’t know what he’s talking about, Generale. I’m not about to let anything that good get away from me. She’s worth the inconvenience on the trail.’
Verdugo grinned and said, ‘She makes up for it at night, eh? I mean, of course, she cooks and sews very well. She is built well for such camp chores. I think I would wish to keep her too. But let us return to important matters. According to my map, we are not too far from a Costa Rican stagecoach station. They are sure to have many horses on hand there, no?’
Captain Gringo had to try. So he said, ‘We’ve ridden the mail stages in the high country, Generale. The coaches are drawn mostly by Spanish mules.’
‘Bueno, this far south a good mule has most horses beat. I must mount my people in any case.’
Captain Gringo shook his head and said, ‘You have almost a hundred men, and some of your men have more than one adelita. That adds up to at least two hundred mounts, even with some of the lighter girls riding double. No stage station is about to keep two hundred mules in its corral, sir.’
‘What do you suggest, then? I must have horses or mules. I agree that it is rare to find two hundred head in one place. So what is wrong with picking them up a few head at a time?’
‘The Costa Rican Guard, sir. When people lose even one mount, they yell about it a lot. Would you really want cavalry chasing you with more than half your people still on foot? Everyone on the other side will be mounted. There’s simply no way of outrunning cavalry on foot.’
‘Perhaps. But infantry can always outmaneuver cavalry in rough country, and I intend to follow the escarpment north to our own country, once I get some mounts.’
