by Stella James
“Hey,” she says as she walks toward me and stands on her toes, pressing her lips to mine. I put my arms around her and hold her tightly to me, deepening our kiss and not giving a single fuck who’s watching. When I finally lean back I rest my forehead against hers.
“How was your day?” she asks.
“Boring, until now.” I press my lips quickly to hers once more before leading her around to the passenger side and opening her door. I take an appreciative look at her perfect ass as she steps up and into the Jeep before I head back to the driver’s side and start the engine.
“So, what are we doing?” she asks.
“How about dinner? I know a good place if you like Chinese food.” The place I’m thinking of is small and cheap but it’s the best in the city.
“Sure, just swing by my place quick so I can take a quick shower?”
“You got it.” I lace her fingers with mine and hold her slim hand on my lap the entire drive to her apartment.
When we get there, I’m expecting to be waiting for at least an hour, so I’m surprised when she comes out of the bathroom showered and dressed in twenty minutes. I’m sitting on the couch flipping through the channels while her cat sits beside me, watching me yet refusing to come near me. Dru looks casual but sexy in a tight pair of jeans and a loose fitting black T-shirt. Her hair is still up but she’s put on a bit of makeup and added a long necklace with a large turquoise pendant on the end.
“I hope I didn’t take too long, I’m ready if you are,” she says.
I flick off the T.V and step toward her while she sits on a chair by the door and zips up her black boots. I hold out my hand for her and pull her to stand. I can smell her familiar perfume, it’s sweet and subtle and a scent that I don’t think I will ever forget.
“You look beautiful.”
“Thanks,” she smiles and wraps her arms around my neck, pulling me down. Our kiss starts slow but then takes on a life of its own as I back her up against the door and slide my tongue against hers. She tastes minty and so fucking good. She moans into my mouth and when my hand trails up to her breast she pulls away, breathing heavily.
“I can’t control myself with you Ethan,” she breathes. “As soon as you touch me, I want more.”
She places her hand on my chest and when her eyes flash to mine, I see a hint of uncertainty that she quickly masks with a laugh.
“If we don’t leave now, we’ll never eat. And I’m starving,” she says.
Before she can open the door, I pull her back against me. I can’t help but breathe her in, nor can I help pressing my mouth to the back of her neck.
“I’m in this too,” I say against her skin. When she turns to me, I hate that I see such visible reassurance on her face. I hate that she needed it, because I should have made certain that she knew without a doubt that we are wrapped up in this thing together. There are things that I’m willing to keep from her in the name of my own selfishness, but I don’t want her doubting how much I want her.
“Thank you for saying that. Now take me to dinner,” she says, brushing her soft lips against my cheek.
*
When we pull up to the dingy old restaurant, Dru looks at me with one perfect eyebrow raised in question. I can’t really blame her; the place looks like a complete shithole. But I’ve been eating here since I was a kid and I swear the food is worth it. I turn off the engine and reach for her hand.
“Trust me, I wouldn’t take you out to dinner just to end up killing you,” I point out.
She looks out her window again at the faded awning and stained windows before she responds with a smirk, “Whatever you say, but if I end up hugging the toilet all night, you’re holding my hair back for me.”
I get out and round the vehicle to open her door. When we step inside the same small bell that’s been hanging on the front door since I was ten jingles and soon there’s a young hostess showing us to our table. The outside might be questionable, but the inside is nice and clean. We take our seats and flip through the menus, I’m about to suggest something to Dru who is clearly still skeptical when I hear the bell jingle again behind us.
“Ethan?”
I look up and see that my parents are about to be seated on the opposite side of the dining room. Fuck. I haven’t seen my folks in at least a month. We used to have dinner together at least once a week but the last time I was there, my old man and I got into it and I haven’t been back since. Seeing my mom and how happy she looks to see me makes me feel like a piece of shit. I stand as she makes her way to our table and pulls me into a tight hug.
“Hey, Mom.”
“What a nice surprise,” she says as she turns to where my dad stands, refusing to budge another inch. He’s always been a stubborn bastard, but he loves my mom and when she gives him a look of contempt, he steps forward and offers his hand.
“Son, it’s good to see you,” he says gruffly.
“Dad.”
Becker Talbot was a rookie cop when he met and married my mom. He worked hard and climbed his way up the ranks, working as a senior detective for over a decade before retiring from the force two years ago. As his son, it was understood and expected that I would follow in his footsteps. Me quitting the force is a disappointment he hasn’t been able to let go of. And no matter how hard my mom tries, there’s no easy fix for the current rift between us. I hear Dru clear her throat as she looks up at me waiting for an introduction.
“Right. Mom, Dad, this is Dru Marx. Dru, these are my folks, Becker and Gina.”
She stands and offers her hand to my dad first. “It’s a pleasure to meet you sir,” she says, and I see a slight pink blush in my old man’s cheeks as he instructs her to call him Beck.
She turns to my mom next who waves off her formality and pulls her in for a hug. Dru looks surprised but humours my mom and hugs her back.
“It’s so nice to meet you Dru, would you two like to join us?”
I say no just as Dru says yes and before I know it my mother is flagging down the hostess and asking for a bigger table.
Once we’ve sat down and placed our order I wait for the inevitable third degree from my dad, but before he can get a word out my mom takes over and asks Dru how we met.
“Well, actually we met at work,” she says. “Ethan was hired to do security at the club where I work part time.”
“Oh good for you, I imagine waitressing brings in plenty of tips with people always coming and going in this city,” my mother says.
Dru looks to me for what I assume is reassurance and since I would never want nor expect her to be anyone other than herself, I quietly urge her to tell my mom what exactly she does.
“I used to wait tables when I first started but I actually perform on stage now. The Nightingale is a burlesque club,” she says proudly. “The only one in the city, in fact.”
“Well isn’t that something, I’ve always admired dancers. I am completely tone deaf and not nearly coordinated enough for that type of thing. That’s wonderful that you’re able to make a living doing something that you clearly have a joy for.”
“I also paint,” she says. “And I sketch.”
“Dru actually has her own exhibit coming up next month at one of the galleries downtown where she sells her work,” I add. “She’s an incredible artist.” She reaches her under the table and laces her fingers with mine, blushing slightly.
“That must take a lot of commitment, developing a skill like that,” my dad acknowledges.
I know exactly where this conversation is headed and so does my mom because she looks at him pleadingly before glancing down at the table and softly shaking her head.
“Beck, not tonight,” she says.
“Gina, you can’t expect me to sit here and understand why our son threw away his entire future. And for what? To work security at some damn night club?”
“Beck!”
“No Mom, it’s fine. If you want to be pissed at me, be pissed at me,” I tell my dad. “But don’t take this shi
t out on Dru.”
“Ethan, maybe I should just head home and give you some time alone with your parents,” Dru offers quietly.
“Does your girl here know that you’re a quitter, son? Does she know that you were one of the best damn cops in your precinct? That you were months away from making detective before you blew your chance?” He’s raising his voice now and as people begin to glance at our table, my mom offers an apologetic smile. “And for-.”
“Enough!” My fist hits the table and I can hear Dru’s sharp intake of breath beside me. “That’s enough,” I say calmly. “You want to call me a quitter, go ahead, that’s exactly what I am. But you don’t know the fucking half of it and I’m not going to sit here and listen to you tell me what a damn disappointment I am.” I look at my mom and can see her blinking back tears. “We’re leaving. I’m sorry, Mom.”
I stand and urge Dru to do the same. She hesitates for a minute but allows me to lead her from the restaurant. I feel bad for walking out on my mom, but I know that if I don’t get the hell out of here, I’ll end up saying something to my dad that I can’t take back. My parents don’t know the real reason I quit being a cop and the last thing I want right now is an inquisition with Dru there to witness it.
I pull away from the curb with no destination in mind, when her soft voice pulls me from my thoughts. “Ethan?”
“Yeah,” I exhale roughly and keep my eyes on the road.
“Are we going to talk about what happened back there?” she asks.
We sit in silence as I navigate the busy city streets. I know she deserves some sort of explanation for tonight. When we reach my building, I pull into the underground garage and turn off the engine but don’t move.
“My dad’s a good man, but things have been tense between us lately. He thinks I threw my future away and he can’t seem to move past it. I can’t stand to hear him tell me how little he thinks of my choices. There’s not much else to it,” I explain.
She’s quiet for a moment and looks down at her hands before her brown eyes flash to mine and she lets go of a sigh. “You’re going to have to give me answers eventually, Ethan. I understand more than anyone, not wanting to drag up the past. But if this is going to go beyond what we have now then you have to let me in at some point,” she says. “I won’t live in the shadow of whatever is holding you back, I’m just not built that way.”
I have no words of reassurance for her because I don’t want to lie by more than just omission. So when she slips her hand in mine, I let the warmth of her touch convince me that I’m doing the right thing by preventing my past from tainting what we have with each other. I am a coward plain and simple. She tugs on my hand and offers me a smile.
“Come on, take me upstairs and show me your apartment. “You still haven’t fed me and I’m close to wasting away over here,” she laughs.
I don’t deserve her.
Chapter 15
Dru
This is the first time I’ve been to Ethan’s apartment and I’m pleasantly surprised at how clean and tidy it is. I’ve been in my fair share of bachelor pads and although Ethan’s place screams single man, it’s nowhere near the worst that I’ve seen. The décor in the living room is minimal and the furniture is worn but comfortable looking. A large flat screen T.V. is mounted on the wall and the two standing shelves on either side are lined with books and movies. His kitchen is small but clean with a table and two chairs and not much else. I’m still taking everything in when he opens the fridge and digs around for something for us to eat.
“The pickings are slim,” he says.
“That’s okay, I’m not fussy.”
I pick up a framed picture off the shelf of him and his parents from what appears to be his academy graduation. He looks so young and handsome. He hasn’t changed drastically, except for the scruff that now covers his jaw and his hair is a bit longer. The young man in the photo looks a bit softer than the man I’ve come to know. There’s a weariness currently in his eyes that doesn’t appear to be present back then.
We end up sitting on his leather sofa eating sandwiches and each having a beer. I like being taken out just as much as the next girl, but I’m glad we ended up at Ethan’s place instead. It feels like I’m getting more and more of him each time we’re together and although he hasn’t come totally clean about whatever it is that not only troubles him but has apparently caused a rift with his parents, I find that I’m okay with it. For now. Taking things slow is probably for the best. Ethan and I have a connection, there’s no doubt about that and I can wait a little while longer for the rest. My past isn’t something that I often bring up, so I can understand him needing time. I’ve never shared my past with anyone I’ve dated before. On so many levels, things with Ethan are different.
“How was rehearsal today?” he asks.
“Really good! Maci seems to be working out and I actually think that if my exhibit goes well, I’m going to quit.” I haven’t told Gus or Vanessa yet, and as much as I love the girls and the club I think my time is coming to an end. I want to focus on my art full-time and if my show generates enough buzz, I should be able to do just that. I also have a modest amount of savings that I’ve banked over the years which further encourages me to think about moving on at this point.
Ethan takes our plates to the sink and grabs us each another beer. I take off my boots and curl my legs underneath me.
“Would you miss it?” He hands me a bottle and takes a sip of his own.
“I think I’ll miss the girls and of course I’ll miss Gus, but it just feels like the right thing to do. I mean, I’ve been there since I was eighteen and the long-term plan was always to be able to live off my paintings. Cassie seems to have faith in me and I know I have space at her gallery regardless of how the exhibit goes,” I say. “And besides, if you’re not going to be there to watch me then it just doesn’t have the same appeal.”
I place my bottle on the coffee table and reach for his, setting it beside mine while he watches me curiously. I grab the remote off the sofa and turn it to a top forty music channel. I can’t explain the sudden urge I have to show Ethan just how I feel but the need is strong and if it results with his hands on me then it’s well worth it. I crave his touch on my skin like I’ve never craved anything before and I see the same desire in his eyes as I turn up the volume and begin to circle my hips. The previous song ends and just as Selena Gomez’s Good For You begins to play, I take Ethan’s hand and wordlessly urge him to shift forward so that he sits near the edge of the sofa. His hands grip my hips as I slowly sway them side to side in time with the beat of the slow song. I lean down and brush my lips against his.
“Did you know that from the first time I saw you watching me onstage that every time I danced after that was for you? That I moved for you?” I pull the hem of my shirt up and over my head, tossing it on the floor. “That it was only ever the two of us in that entire room?”
I can hear the hiss of his breathe as I unclasp my lacy black bra and let it fall passed my shoulders and down my arms. My breasts are painfully heavy and my nipples are hard with the anticipation of feeling his mouth. I undo the button of my jeans, but his hands cover mine before I can pull the zipper down. When I look down at him his eyes are hooded and he’s looking at me like he’s about to devour me whole. The throbbing between my legs increases and I can feel my panties beginning to dampen.
“Take your hair down,” he demands roughly.
I’ve never been with someone who takes charge the way that Ethan does. It’s never forced or intimidating. He’s naturally commanding, and I find myself naturally submissive and more than willing to comply each and every time. Once I’ve pulled the elastic from my hair, I shake the strands loose, shivering as they fall around my shoulders and Ethan eyes shine with approval. He rolls my jeans over my hips, taking my black thong with them and pulls them all the way down. When I step from the garment, I stand in front of him completely naked and painfully aroused. He plants his strong hands back on m
y hips and urges me to pick up the beat up once more. I sway my hips back and forth and run my hands along my ribcage and into my hair. I tangle my fingers in the dark waves and lift my hair up so that he can see my breasts. My little performance was meant to be for him, but being naked while he is clothed and seeing the look of appreciation in his eyes is completely undoing me. I lose myself in the music and forget everything except how he makes me feel.
“Fuck, you’re so sexy Dru,” he praises, bringing his palms around to my ass and squeezing tightly. He pulls me into him and runs his nose along the small strip of hair on my sex, inhaling deeply and groaning. “I can’t fucking stand to not be inside of you Dru, my cock fucking aches for you.”
I moan deep in my chest at his words and nudge him back on the sofa so that I can bring myself down to rest on his lap. My thighs are on either side of him, my clit brushes against the stiffness of his jeans and nearly kills me. I grind myself shamelessly on his lap while he gathers my hair in his hands and tugs my head back, bringing his mouth to my neck, licking and nipping along my heated skin until he grazes past my ear.
“Are you wet?”
“Mm, yes Ethan, I’m always wet for you,” I gasp.
“What do you want Dru? Tell me what you need.”
Words fail me, I want so much from him and I can’t think past the aching in my core or the shortness of my breath. I want his mouth on me, I want his fingers inside me. I want him to taste me and use me. The room fills with my breathless moans and his deep guttural response to every twitch of my hips against his erection.
“I want everything Ethan, God please, I need everything,” I moan desperately as I grab his hand and shove it between us. I lift my hips and thrust two of his thick fingers inside of me. “Don’t you see Ethan, how much I need you? I ache for you just as much as you ache for me. I’m dripping for you.”
