by Stella James
*
I’m standing off to the side, sipping a beer while Cassie directs Dru around the mingling crowd. The gallery is packed with people and from the murmuring that I’ve heard, people like what they see.
“Ethan!”
I look up and see Dru’s sisters, Elle and Anna, making their way toward me. We haven’t formally met yet, but I recognize them from the night they came to the club. I know they aren’t related by blood and there isn’t a single similarity between the three women, but Dru has never referred to them as anything but her sisters and I know it means a great deal to her that they hold that title.
“It’s nice to see you again Ethan,” Elle says.
“Likewise,” I reply.
“There he is, finally. Sorry, excuse me, I see my husband just walked in.”
She turns and navigates her way through the crowd until she reaches a man wearing an expensive suit. He pulls her close and they stand like that, speaking quietly to each other as people detour around them.
“Don’t mind them,” Anna says. “They are crazy in love and pretty much forget about the entire human race when they’re together.”
I know that Dru and Anna are close and that Dru often worries about her younger sister. I don’t have siblings of my own to compare that to, but Anna seems like a nice person and as we stand there making small talk I begin to understand what Dru meant when she said that Anna has a way about her with people. She’s easy to talk to and there’s something soothing and kind in her voice even if the conversation isn’t important.
“So, I guess this is the part where I give you the third degree about not hurting my sister, right?” she asks with a grin.
“At least let me get you a drink first,” I say as I snag a glass of champagne off the tray on the bar behind me.
“Thank you,” she smiles. “And relax, I’m not very good at stern warnings, so I’ll just cut to the chase. Dru’s never looked at anyone the way she looks at you and I know you mean a lot to her. I hope you know how lucky you are,” she says, clinking her glass against mine.
I take the last sip of my beer and wash down the bitter taste of a reality that Anna just unknowingly rubbed in my face. I watch Dru as she stands in front of the piece she painted in Maria’s honour, she’s talking with the lady beside her and I can tell from the look on her face that she’s describing the inspiration behind the painting. There’s a sadness in her eyes but also a sense of pride in her expression. Anna continues to speak but her words fall on deaf ears as I continue to stare and slowly begin to accept that my time is running out.
It’s close to ten by the time everything wraps up and the crowd begins to thin out. Dru hasn’t stopped for more than a minute all night and I’ve hardly gotten a moment alone with her. Anna has kept me company most of the evening, further cementing Dru’s opinion that her sister is a complete and total saint since I’ve offered little more than a grunted response to her since she arrived. I’m sitting in one of the plastic chairs near the door when Dru finally emerges from the office.
“Hey you,” she says, sitting down next to me. “I’m sorry about that, I didn’t think I’d be so busy. Did everyone leave already?”
“You just missed Blake and Elle. Gus took Esme and Anna home about an hour ago,” I respond. She reaches for my hand and leans into me.
“Okay,” she sighs. “Cassie is going to do a tally tomorrow morning and let me know how we did.” Her lips brush my neck. “Take me home Ethan.”
She pulls me to stand and the blind faith shining in her gorgeous eyes has the truth that I owe her on the tip of my tongue. But I swallow it down like the coward I am and hold her close to me as we walk through the doors of the gallery and into the night. When we reach her apartment, I take my time loving every inch of her body. I taste her thoroughly and when she breathlessly chants my name, I commit the sweet sound to memory. I take her slowly and selfishly and with the certainty that this will be the last time I feel her heart beating against mine.
Chapter 21
Dru
I roll over and swipe the snooze function on my phone, effectively silencing the obnoxious ring tone. Light is starting to seep in through the semi-open curtains and I know I should get up. I set the damn alarm for a reason, but I just can’t seem to peel myself from the comfort of my bed.
It’s been five days since my show and I’ve I spent exactly one of those days basking in the afterglow of what Cassie referred to as a successful debut. I didn’t sell every piece, but I sold more than half and that’s more than I ever hoped for. The rest of my time since then has been spent fielding nonstop inquiries on commissioned pieces for both private purposes and commercial. Cassie warned me that if my show went well things could blow up, but I had now idea to what degree. I finally made at least some semblance of a plan yesterday and decided which offers I would accept for now and which ones would have to wait.
I’ve almost been busy enough not to notice the shift in my relationship with Ethan. Almost. Things have been off since the night of my exhibit and I remain in the dark as to why. I told Ethan that I would give him time but the longer he puts me off, the harder it is to not feel hurt that he won’t confide in me. I know that he senses my growing impatience because he’s been scarce since that night, offering me nothing besides a text or a quick phone call to let me know that he’s working late or attending some function with Ty. I wish he would just let me in.
My phone goes off again and this time I snatch it off the nightstand, checking for any indication that maybe Ethan was thinking enough of me last night to leave me a message. Nothing.
Me: Just wanted to let you know that I’m thinking of you. Please call me xo
I still haven’t gotten a response by the time I make a cup of coffee and start on my first commission.
*
I toss my brushes into the sink and begin cleaning them, rolling my shoulders in a sad attempt to ease the ache from working steadily all day. I never did hear from Ethan and after my third call went unanswered, I cut my losses and threw myself into my work and didn’t stop until about ten minutes ago. I glance at the clock and see that it’s just past midnight. Lucy dances at my feet, rubbing her head against my leg.
“I know, you were just starting to like him, weren’t you?”
I was hoping that the distraction of work might offer me the slightest bit of clarity or at the very least, the hope that this is simply a rough patch that we can overcome. Sadly, I still feel as wretched now as I did this morning. It’s obvious that Ethan has a past, the fact that whatever that past is now effects where things between us go, frustrates me to say the least. I lay my brushes out to dry and wipe my hands when my phone begins to chime. I instantly get my hopes up only to be let down when I glance at the screen and see that it’s Elle.
“Hey, aren’t you working tonight?”
“Yeah, I’m at the hospital now. Dru, you need to get down here,” she pauses. “It’s Anna.”
I hang up the phone and scramble to find pants and a sweater before I’m out the door with a lump lodged in my throat. I flag down a cab and give him the name of the hospital, trying to keep the hysteria out of my voice. It isn’t far, but the drive feels like it takes twice as long. I type out one last message to Ethan and hit send just as we pull up to the large building.
Me: I need you. Please.
Elle is waiting for me just inside the doors to emergency, I jog up the sidewalk and throw my arms around her.
“What’s going on? Where is she?”
“She’s going to be okay, the cops are interviewing her now,” she says.
“The cops?”
“I don’t know much yet, but according to her neighbour he found her in the hallway. She was laid out on the floor; her door was wide open apparently. She didn’t speak much, he said she was pretty in and out of it on the way here.”
We pass through the sliding glass doors and she takes me down the hallway to one of the waiting areas. The place is practically deser
ted except for a man sitting in the corner of the room. Elle nudges my side and mouths neighbour as we approach the row of chairs across from him.
“Mr. Miller, this is my sister Dru,” she says.
Wait. Neighbour?
“Hey, sorry abou-.”
“You! You’re the bastard that’s been terrorizing our sister with your bullshit parties,” I hiss. “Was it one of your friends that did this? I swear to God if you were responsible for this, I’ll-.”
“Dru!”
Elle pulls me back and pushes me into one of the cold plastic chairs. I look over at the man responsible for my sister’s sleep deprivation and stress. At least has the decency to look remorseful, which softens my anger by a small fraction.
“It wasn’t anyone that I know. And trust me, if it was, I would have dealt with them myself.” His deep voice is certain and even if I think he’s a complete prick, I also think that I believe him. Anna failed to mention that she and her elusive neighbour from hell seem to have formed some kind of truce. Interesting.
“I’m going to go check with the doctor and see if we can go in,” Elle says.
“Did you call Esme?”
“Uh, she was pretty out of it on the ride over, but she did mention that she didn’t want me to call Esme. I didn’t know who she was talking about, so I didn’t think to mention it when we arrived,” he says.
“I won’t call her for now, unless things are worse than we think,” she says, leaving the room.
The ticking clock on the wall echoes in the tiny space as we continue to ignore each other. “You can go if you want. I’m here now and I’m sure you have people to get back to,” I say.
“Nah, I’m good. I told Anna I’d stay.”
Okay then.
I keep getting the nagging feeling that I know this guy from somewhere, but I can’t place it. He doesn’t look familiar but I’m sure I’ve heard his name before and I know Anna wasn’t the one who told me.
“Wait. You’re Sebastian Miller? The potter?” I remember now, his name was mentioned in an article that I read not that long ago. He was teaching pottery classes for kids at one of the community centers downtown. Free of charge.
“Last I checked,” he grins.
“Hm. Well I guess just because you do nice things for children, it doesn’t obligate you to be a decent neighbour,” I snap back.
His reply is interrupted when Elle walks back into room and says we can see her now. I practically jump from my chair and follow her down the hallway. Two officers pass us as we reach the door to the exam room where Anna is being treated. I don’t even realize that Sebastian has followed us until I hear one of the officers speak and I turn around to see that they’ve stopped him and are jotting down whatever he’s saying. Elle opens the door and I sigh in relief when we see Anna sitting upright on the bed, a white bandage wrapped around her head. I rush to the bed and wrap my arms around my sister while Elle picks up her chart and begins reading it out loud.
“Stitches, a mild concussion and a decent sized lump,” she says.
“Jesus Anna, what happened?” I ask.
“I went out with some people from work and when I got home I noticed my door was open a bit. I wasn’t going to go in, but before I could turn around the door whipped open and someone crashed into me. I fell back and must have hit my head,” she says. “It’s kind of foggy after that but I think Sebastian must have found me, he brought me here, right?”
“Yeah. I did,” he says from the doorway.
All three of us look at him and he shrugs his shoulder as if to say it was no big deal. Elle gets paged just then and gives Anna a quick hug, stopping to take Sebastian’s hand in hers and squeezing it on her way out.
“Thank you,” she says to him. He looks uncomfortable and again tries to brush it off.
We’re told by another nurse that the doctor will be in shortly but after thirty minutes I decide to go in search of him instead. When I come back into the room, Sebastian is standing in front of Anna and it seems like they are in deep conversation. I need to grill her in a few days when she’s feeling better and find out what the hell is up with the two of them. The doctor comes in and gives Anna instructions on how to deal with her head wound. She’ll have to wear the bandage for at least twenty-four hours and come back in two weeks to have her stitches removed.
“I recommend that you don’t spend tonight alone,” he says. “I’d like to be cautious and have you woken up every couple of hours just to be safe.”
“I’ll stay with her,” Sebastian and I say at the same time.
“What? She’s not staying with you, you’re a stranger,” I say.
“I’m not a stranger, we’re friends. Right Anna?”
She looks down at her hands and then up at the doctor.
“I’ll let you sort this out Ms. Brookes and when you’re ready, your discharge papers will be at the front desk.”
“Seriously, she’s not staying with you.”
“Dru. It’s fine. You’ve been crazy busy, and you need to sleep. Sebastian and I have gotten to know each other and I’m sure he can manage to wake me up a couple times, right?”
“I think I can handle it,” he concedes.
I want to fight her on this but she’s giving me the same look she used to give me when I’d interfere with the mean girls at school. She wants to handle this on her own, and I get it. I don’t like it. But I get it.
“Are you sure?” I ask her.
“Yes. I’ll be fine, and I’ll call you first thing in the morning,” she says.
“Ugh, fine. But if I don’t hear from you first thing I’m calling the cops,” I say glaring in Sebastian’s general direction.
I decline Sebastian’s offer to drive me home and instead hail a cab. I check my phone and see that my last message to Ethan remains unanswered. Great. It’s just past two when I pay the driver and head upstairs, my exhaustion quickly catching up with me. I walk around the corner and look up to see the current occupant of my thoughts sitting in front of my apartment door, leaning against it and looking just a little bit drunk.
*
I let my feet hit the floor a little harder than necessary as I approach Ethan, his eyes peel open and when I expect a sloppy grin, I get a blank stare instead.
“Where have you been?” I ask as I lean above him and unlock the door.
“I should ask you the same thing,” he counters. I catch a whiff of liquor on his breathe but his words aren’t quite slurred which I’m hoping means that we can have an actual conversation. I push open the door and wait impatiently for him to stand and follow me into the kitchen. I toss my bag onto the counter and unzip my coat while he flicks the lock behind him and leans against the door.
“I was at the hospital with Anna, she surprised some asshole while he was in the middle of robbing her and she fell and hit her head. I tried calling you. I also tried texting you, and not just tonight Ethan, I’ve tried all damn day. What’s going on?”
He exhales loudly and rubs his eyes roughly with the heels of his palms. I’m not sure what he hopes the gesture will achieve but I’m running low on sleep and my patience is wearing thin.
“Ethan, talk to me. Please.”
He looks up at me with remorse in his eyes and I know that I’m about to be let down gently.
“This isn’t going to work Dru, I think it’s better if we end things now before it’s too late,” he says.
“End things before it’s too late?” I can feel my eyes begin to burn but I push the emotion away and speak with as much confidence as I can muster. “No. I don’t accept that Ethan, whatever is going on with you is something we can work through together. I’m not giving up, not without a fight. God, don’t you care about me? About us?”
“It’s because I care about you that this has to end now. If it doesn’t end now, it will eventually, and I’d rather get it done.”
“I’m not a fucking Band-Aid that you rip off Ethan, and how is ending things now sparing anyone when
I’m already in love with you?”
“You’re not in love with me Dru, you’re in love with an idea. And it’s not me,” he says sadly.
There’s a finality in his voice but I can’t bring myself to accept it. Not when I know that whatever haunts him is behind this whole bullshit conversation. I take a step forward and reach my hand for his.
“Talk to me, please. Tell me what this is all about and we can figure it out together,” I say gently. “Whatever it is Ethan, I can help.”
He rips his hand from mine and puts distance between us as he paces back and forth. “You can’t help, don’t you get that? There’s nothing you can do because you don’t even know the real me.”
“So, tell me then. Does this have to do with Lindsey?”
His gaze flashes to mine. Bingo.
“You don’t know what the fuck you’re talking about,” his voice is cold and has me withdrawing my hand before I can touch him.
“Maybe not Ethan, but if you would just talk to me, we could figure this out. You must see that, don’t you? Don’t you want to at least try and move on from whatever has been holding you back?”
“Oh, and is that what you’re doing?” he shoots back.
“What is that supposed to mean?”
“I don’t know Dru, is that envelope still stuck to your fridge?” He glances to where the envelope in question still hangs beneath the pink magnet.
“That’s different,” I argue, my own temper beginning to flare. “And don’t try to change the subject, I just want you to talk to me so we can move forward. Don’t you want to move forward?”
“You can tell yourself that you’re moving on Dru, but you’re just as stuck as I am. The only difference here is that I’m not on my damn high horse trying to pry shit from you that I have no business sticking my nose in.”
“Get out.” The words come out calm, but the storm brewing behind them is dangerously close to the surface. We aren’t speaking like rational adults and I can’t continue talking in circles to someone who won’t let me in. “Get out of my apartment,” I repeat, my voice catching this time. I keep my chin up and swallow hard past the despair in my throat. He hesitates for a moment before heading for the door.
