Stella flashed him a quick look that, if he didn’t know how fearless she was, might have been panic. He gave her an encouraging smile and tried not to panic himself. She wanted everything. This was it. This was his world. These were the people and situations that she’d avoided for so long but would have to get used to if she really wanted what she said she did.
He walked around the room admiring Franc’s work and talking with some of his friends. They all inclined their heads as their eyes flicked to the hulking figure of his driver-bodyguard in a corner of the gallery. After that, they talked to him like any other artist. It what he liked best about them; they cared more about what he could do than who his family was.
They swapped stories of their own nightmares of unfinished pieces and creative blocks. It was nice for him to be with people who understood what he was going through. It was even nicer to be out and about after what felt like endless weeks of non-stop work. The drinks and food were better than he’d expected, and everyone was chatting animatedly about upcoming shows they were looking forward to, including his own.
Then Stella joined him after a good fifteen minutes in the back, and his mood instantly sank. Her face was the same blank indifference he’d seen in the studio that morning. He couldn’t tell what she thought of what she’d seen in the back. A knot started to form in the pit of his stomach. He took a long sip from his drink, finishing the whiskey in a single gulp before placing the empty glass on a nearby table.
He put his hand around her shoulder and leaned his head to her ear.
“Everything okay?”
She nodded and leaned into him slightly. Not too much, not enough to seem overly affectionate to onlookers, but enough to let him know she was there.
He took a deep breath and reminded himself of what she’d said at his studio. Just because she didn’t seem excited didn’t mean she wasn’t. Her discreteness was one of the things he appreciated most about her, even if right now he wished she wasn’t quite so good at masking her feelings.
They walked around the room and he talked about the different pieces as she nodded, silently, her fingers tugging gently at her bottom lip.
When someone stopped him to talk she went ahead on her own. She took in everything with her serious, blank face, revealing nothing. She smiled when people talked to her, and chatted animatedly with them, but her concentration was clearly on the work displayed. It was hard to tell if she was interested, confused, or simply bored.
As the night wore on, he started to grow irritated by her silence. It had been reassuring at first that she clearly wasn’t there to steal attention from him, or from Franc, the way the other women there were trying to do. Not that he’d really expected her to do that. The past few years, she’d shown how much she could avoid the spotlight when required.
But here was a chance to be at his side and get attention from both him and the crowd. And she was choosing instead to retreat and become nothing more than background dressing. He remembered seeing her like this at parties when they were younger always careful and observing. Days later, when scandal broke, it was usually due to something Stella had seen or heard.
Old habits can be hard to break, he thought as he felt his eyes taking in the movements of several of the more scantily dressed women. Not that he was at all tempted. But he was an artist after all, and was used to appreciating beautiful forms without necessarily feeling any desire behind it.
After her third circle around the studio, Stella came to stand next to him, and he put his arm around her shoulder once again.
“You look amazing,” he whispered into her hair, holding her close. He felt her arm stiffen beneath his hand. She looked up at him and simply smiled. His brows furrowed.
What the hell is wrong with her? Isn’t this what she wanted?
“Are we staying much longer?” she asked quietly, leaning her head next to his so that only he heard her words.
Instead of a sultry, excited voice, it was flat and tired. A ripple of irritation ran through him.
“This may go on for awhile longer,” he said, noticing that the bar in the corner had only just started to get busy. “And Franc’s having something at his place afterwards.”
“Okay, but I might not go with you. I have work tomorrow,” she said, turning to look out into the room. She kept a slight smile on her face so that no one looking at them would think anything was amiss. He did the same, keeping his arm draped over her shoulders, but his other hand was clenched tight inside of his pocket.
“I think I’ll just go now, actually,” she said, not looking at him. “You’ll have more fun without me.”
He took a deep breath and closed his eyes, biting back his frustration.
Give her space, he told himself. Today’s been a big day. She has somewhere to be at 8am every day and would never go in hungover. She’s responsible. That’s what you like about her, right?
She planted a quick kiss on his cheek and turned to go.
“I’ll see you tomorrow?”
He nodded, watching her walk out into the dark night, his stomach once again in a tangle of knots no amount of whiskey could undo.
Chapter 15
“I just don’t understand,” Stella said, pouting into the camera on her computer.
“That he’s obsessed with you?” Alix’s tone was teasing, her lips lifted in an almost-smile, but Stella didn’t find anything funny about the situation.
“He’s obsessed with my body,” said Stella. She’d though long and hard about it in the two days since she’d seen Anton’s studio. “It was all my body. That’s all anyone sees.”
“Well, you are pretty hot.”
Stella huffed in annoyance.
“I thought he saw more in me! Is that all he cares about?”
“What’s he supposed to do? Paint your brain?” Now Alix was almost laughing.
“It’s not funny! Everyone knows how smart you are, Princess Doctor de Neunesse. I’m just your pretty and shallow best friend.”
“Right, I forgot how dumb all financial analysts are supposed to be.” Alix rolled her eyes.
“The ones who work for their dads are,” she grumbled.
The video call had been a bad idea. Alix knew her little mannerisms too well. It was easier to hide her feelings when they were just on the phone.
Still, it was great to finally have her face to face, even virtually, after so long. What had started as a quick rundown of the engagement party details had quickly shifted gears to a Stella/Anton discussion. Alix hadn’t been too surprised by their reunion, but seemed confused by Stella’s reaction to his art.
Alix sighed and her eyebrows drew together. Stella squirmed uncomfortably under her best friend’s questioning gaze.
“Wasn’t it what you wanted? To see his studio?”
Stella hesitated then nodded.
“He’s so talented,” she said, not even trying to hide the pride in her voice. There was no denying that, despite the questionable motives in his subject matter.
“This was a big step for him. Showing you everything couldn’t have been easy.”
“I know,” said Stella, her hands twisting in her lap where Alix couldn’t see them. It was still a little overwhelming and humbling to think of how much he trusted her. It was tempering her annoyance quite a bit.
“I just wish he showed me he loves all of me,” Stella said, biting back the lower lip she wanted to jut out.
“He said that he loves you?” Alix’s eyebrows shot up.
“Not in so many words.”
“Do you love him?”
Stella remained silent. Of course she did. She’d loved him since they were teenagers. It had been her singular goal to get his attention for years. She’d been willing to put up with so much, and give up so much of herself just to be with him, on his terms. Walking away from him a few months ago had been the hardest thing she’d ever done. But it had been worth it now that it made him open up like this. He had to feel the same, right?
“He took me to an opening at the gallery.” Stella decided to avoid answering Alix’s question and made a face to distract her. Alix laughed.
“You didn’t have a good time I take it?”
Stella shook her head.
“No one talked to me the entire night.” She sighed and put her head in her hands, her nose taking on a large bulbous quality in the tiny camera on the edge of her laptop. She sat up, and was pleased to see her face go back to normal. “They all just stared at me, and whenever I asked a question about one of the pieces, they just wrinkled their nose or chuckled.”
“Why didn’t you say anything to Anton?”
“I wasn’t about to badmouth his friends in front of him! But there was no way I was going to stay there all night with people who clearly thought I was just some hot noble he’s banging.”
She’d used work as an excuse to duck out early, and the tension radiating from him when she left had been hard to read. She’d sent him a message before she fell asleep that night thanking him again for showing her his world. He’d replied with a sweet photo of a sketch on the back of a cocktail napkin of her face and the caption ‘can’t get you out of my head.’ She’d fallen asleep with a warm happy feeling in her stomach that lasted through the next day at work.
Still, the little messages they’d been sending the past few days were not something she was used to. She got a flutter in her stomach just thinking about them. It seemed like things were really going to work this time, if she could just get used to his artist friends. And if they could get used to her.
“Hmm,” Alix looked thoughtful at Stella’s interpretation of how she’d been treated at the gallery. “Are you sure you’re not overreacting just a little? It was your first semi-official outing with Anton, right? Maybe you were just hyper aware of everyone.”
She shrugged, not willing to admit to Alix that she was possibly right.
“I’m sure a few people talked to you.”
“Yeah, Marcella, the gallery owner, trying to look so smart about it all when she took me back to show me the work they’d already started installing.”
She rolled her eyes.
“God, she was so annoying, talking about Anton’s show and how the different pieces meant this and that. He wasn’t even there, but it was like she was trying to make me look dumb in front of him.”
Alix clicked her tongue and shook her head.
“So of course I bragged just a little about the works I’d seen in his studio.”
Alix raised an eyebrow.
“I didn’t say what they were or anything! He doesn’t like people to know about them before they’re finished. I just kind of casually mentioned something like ‘oh yeah, he was telling me about that when we were his studio the other day.’ You should have seen her eyes then.”
Stella let out a satisfied laugh and crossed her arms.
“I don’t get it, Stella,” said Alix, her eyebrows drawn together. “You’re happy he’s showing you his world, but you don’t seem to like what you see.”
Stella twirled a piece of her hair around her finger, trying to figure out a way to explain it. She’d been lying to herself for two years thinking she didn’t want something serious and that she was happy with whatever he could give her. But now, it was suddenly all too much. Going from a private and physical relationship to something so public and emotional... She’d been the one to ask for it, but she wasn’t sure she was really ready.
She took a deep breath and gave Alix a small smile and a shrug. She loved him. That much was clear, even if she didn’t want to admit it out loud. And she was pretty sure he loved her, or was very close, though he hadn’t said it... yet.
She’d been mindlessly scrolling through the various news and gossip sites as they talked, a habit she hadn’t been able to completely break over the past few years.
“Oh, shit,” she said suddenly, her eyes catching sight of Anton’s name.
“What?” Alix sounded panicked at Stella’s wide eyes and open mouth. She rushed to explain.
“There are pictures from Anton’s studio online.”
“Oh, that’s good thought, right? Didn’t some interior design magazine do a whole spread on Helena’s apartment last year?”
Stella shook her head.
“No, no, no, this is totally different. This is his art studio, all his new stuff. It’s not just me who never sees it. No one ever does before a show. He’s going to be furious.”
Alix’s eyes widened.
“That’s crazy, then! How did someone get access?”
“I don’t know!” Stella stood and started looking around for her bag. She found it underneath her bed, and then ran around putting on her shoes and a jacket. “I should go see him. He’s probably pissed.”
“Are you sure?” Alix called from the screen. Stella stopped and turned to look at her.
“Why not? I’ve seen him mad before. I think I can handle it.”
“But this seems like it’ll be so much worse.”
“That’s what being together is about, right? Helping each other through hard times? What do you do when Duncan is mad? Run away?”
This was her chance to step up, show him that she wanted what she’d asked for. To be there for him in his life when he needed her.
Alix frowned but said nothing while Stella quickly applied some makeup at the mirror on her desk.
“Just… be careful,” Alix said finally.
With a quick air kiss and wave at the screen, Stella closed her laptop and rushed out the door.
Chapter 16
Anton was just returning from an all-day meeting at the museum where he was royal patron when his phone buzzed with a text message. He picked it up eagerly, thinking it might be Stella. They hadn’t been able to see each other since the gallery and while normally he’d want to shut himself off to work, he felt an even stronger need to see her again. The messages they’d been sending back and forth were tamer than they’d ever sent in the past, but more personal. He was still working out how exactly to integrate this new emotional connection he was feeling into his work. Maybe something with softer colors or a lighter bronze...
The emotion he was feeling from his phone, however, would be bright splashes of red. He scowled when he saw Helena’s name on the screen. Probably something for the party, he grumbled to himself.
“Yeah?” He unlocked the door to his penthouse and dropped his keys on the table in the hall. His stomach dropped and his breath caught in his throat at the lack of the spare set of keys. Before they’d gone to the gallery for the show, Anton had brought Stella here and given her the keys. He wanted to show her how serious he was about giving her access to everything in his life.
While the gallery hadn’t gone quite the way he’d expected, this was all new. He was willing to give her time now that he saw so clearly how much he needed her. He had no doubt she’d learn how to handle herself in public with him just as she’d learned how to keep things private.
“Have you seen the papers tonight?” Helena said, breaking him out of his constant stream of thoughts of Stella.
“No, I’ve been at the museum board meeting all day.” He was suddenly anxious. “Is it something about Stella being at the gallery with me?” He had expected a little attention, but since it had been a private event and not an official visit, there hadn’t been many photographers. He didn’t see why Helena would be calling him for one or two random pictures. Maybe they’d written something unflattering about her? Stella can take it, he thought proudly.
“Not exactly.”
She was infuriating. He sat down on the couch and stretched out, eager for a little relaxation at the end of a long day. His fingers itched to get into the studio, but he didn’t have anything planned for the next day and knew he could work late into the night. He could put his feet up for a few minutes if his sister would only let him.
“Just tell me, Lena. I swear, you do this to piss me off on purpose.” Using her childhood nickname was his way of piss
ing her off in exchange.
“It mentions the gallery, but it’s all your new stuff.”
“My show opens in three weeks. They’d better be advertising already.”
“It’s not an advertisement! It’s pictures of your studio with some of the new pieces.”
“What?” He sat up, his feet slamming to the ground, all thoughts of relaxing forgotten. His heartbeat was suddenly twice as fast. He took a deep breath. He raced to his computer set up in a corner of the room.
“Did someone break in?” Helena sounded worried as he clicked furiously to wake it up.
“No! Don’t you think I’d have told you?” He tapped in the homepage of The Prynessian Gazette, the country’s largest newspaper, with shaking fingers.
“Maybe someone on the cleaning crew?” She knew how private he was about his work. He hadn’t told her that Stella had seen it; that he’d given her keys.
The page finally loaded, and his eyes took in the familiar space bathed in early afternoon light.
I am such an idiot.
“No,” he answered his sister, his voice a low growl. “I just showed it to someone I shouldn’t have trusted.”
He heard Helena start to ask another question, but he couldn’t breathe, let alone talk anymore. He hung up, throwing the phone with unnecessary force onto the couch. He sank into a crouch and let out a frustrated cry. He took several deep breaths to calm his boiling blood. It wasn’t working. He stood up and started pacing the room.
It had been a mistake to let her in. He thought she’d changed. For two years they’d had perfect privacy. And just by chance, the same week he lets her in, lets her see more, it’s splashed around for everyone to see.
Had he done something that would make her want to hurt him? Everything seemed to be going well. He thought back to the gallery. Was she jealous of the attention he was starting to get as an artist? Maybe that’s why she’d never seemed interested in his shows before. She couldn’t stand seeing him so successful.
Or maybe it was finally too much, holding her tongue and keeping things private. Of all the ways to finally break her silence, and come back as Prynesse’s prime source of information on the nobility, this was the worst way she could have done it.
A Royal Decision Page 7
