by Frankie Love
When she comes, she moans, and I cover her mouth, knowing how hard she worked to nurse and put those babies to sleep. Our babies.
I'm a father. And I am going to make Cherish my wife the first chance I get.
I come in her too, hard and fast, filling her the way I did under the oak tree, knowing I am going to take her again before the sun rises. Knowing I need to run my fingers over her ass, filling her up from behind. She is my gentle flower that is finally in bloom. I want to examine her petals, let her take hold of my stem.
She falls against my chest, exhausted from the talking and the fucking, and when I wrap my arms around her, I sing her to sleep. The song on my lips, one I know she loves: Don't Talk. Put Your Head On My Shoulder. The Beach Boys were always her favorite, and when she begins to breathe heavily, her body cradled in my hold, I know I picked the right one to put her to sleep.
___
The next day, I realize just how hard my love has been working doing this on her own. She's nursing these babies around the clock, in between changing cloth diapers, hand washing them in the boiling water, hanging them to dry—it's a full day’s work—and she hasn't even fed herself. I notice her stomach rumbling, and ask what she's been eating.
"Canned beans and veggies." She points to her makeshift pantry. All home-canned goods—which is impressive, but she's burning through so many calories a day just feeding our children.
"You need some meat on your bones, woman. Some eggs at least."
"If I go to the store I’ll raise a lot of questions. Like, why is a woman with newborn triplets alone in the middle of nowhere?"
I nod. "I get that, baby, but I hate seeing you this way. Half-starved. And we need some tools. Do you even have an ax for firewood?"
She scrunches up her adorable nose. "No, I've been gathering sticks for kindling, for boiling water when I wash the diapers."
"Baby," I tell her, holding a cooing Andrew in my arms. "We're gonna need some more supplies."
Cherish folds her hands over her chest. "You think I need a man to survive? I've been doing just fine on my own."
"I know you have, this set up is impressive as hell, considering you already have so much on your plate. But let me go to town, buy some tools, talk to Jaxon about getting the utilities turned on out here. Hell, there’s an ancient stove and fridge—you just need the power turned on. You're roughing it more than you have to."
"I've been a squatter, James, I couldn't exactly call the utility company. I'm on the run, remember?"'
"You were on the run. You aren't running anymore. Jaxon already told me he has a job for me, so that's covered. We can fix this cabin up real nice, and hell, once we add another few bedrooms on the back, it will be home we can really live in. I can do that in no time."
"Nothing is ever that easy for us, James."
"It's different now. Now we are free from the past, remember? And when I'm in town I'll also find out about a marriage certificate."
Cherish purses her lips. "Is that a proposal?"
I shake my head. "Not officially. I need a ring first, for that." I pull a guitar pick from my jeans pocket. "But for now, take this and know I have been preparing for our life together for as long as I can remember."
She leans over and kisses me. "You better get me some carbs when you're in town too, forget the eggs and bacon. I want a donut and coffee. With cream." Her eyes light up at the thought.
I kiss her back. "You'll be okay up here while I go get some stuff?"
She smiles. "I've been here for a month, hanging on. I'll be okay for a while longer."
"I'll stop at Jaxon's and tell Harper to come over, is that okay? I'd feel better if you weren't alone."
"Okay, baby," she says, kissing the guitar pick, and slipping it into her skirt pocket. "I'll be waiting for you, now and forever."
I kiss her again, then the heads of our three babies, feeling like the goddamn king of this mountain. I have my woman, our children, and a place to make a home.
Now that we are together nothing can stop us.
Chapter Thirteen
I'm laying the babies down in their bassinets when I hear a car rumbling down the driveway. I look up, surprised that Harper could be here so soon. It seems as if James left less than 15 minutes ago.
My eyes sweep over the babies, and even though I'm surprised someone is here, more than anything I feel content—maybe for the first time in my life. Because it feels like my babies are going to be okay. They are safe, wrapped in their little cocoons, sleeping contentedly.
My feet are bare and the air is warm. But when I step outside, the feelings of safety vanish immediately. I pull the door tight, as tight as it can go, and I wish I had a key so I could lock it. Because what I see is terrifying.
I know that car, and I know the man getting out of it. And I know he has come for me.
He's not alone.
Behind him, there are men from our church––his church. Not mine. I've moved on, I let go of those demons and I'm walking in the light. I walked away from their oppressive chains—but here is George and the elders. They don’t belong here.
There's only space for love on this mountain. True, pure love. The love I have in my heart. And I will George to leave, to turn away and go.
But he has other plans for me. I blink hard, imagining him away, but when I open my eyes, he’s still there.
He walks closer, close enough to see my eyes, I know what is to come.
So, I do the only thing I can manage.
I run. I throw my body through the front of the door, the idea of him penetrating the space where my children sleep unfathomable. He bangs his fists on the wooden door and my body leans against the back side, bracing myself in the frame, wanting to keep this monster out.
“Open the door, Cherish,” he bellows.
The tears sting my eyes but I’m not crying for him. It’s the fate of my children that worries me.
"How did you find me?” I ask through the door. “How did you know I was here?"
He laughs, kicking open the door and pushing me aside. When he pulls out a gun, holding it much too close to me, I know the worst is yet to come. The other men I recognize create a circle around me and I don’t move.
James has just got his family back. George can’t take his flesh and blood. Our children were born from something beautiful, and I won’t allow them to go somewhere so wicked.
"That stupid boy, coming back and looking for you. Dumb enough to mention it in town. Dumber still to come back to the compound. He thought we were all gone, but like hell we were. Of course, Luke has people watching the place. James doesn’t seem to understand the game he's playing."
"You followed him to find me?"
George shakes his head. "I got a call yesterday afternoon from these friends of mine at the compound." George looks at the men with him. "Telling me the boy was looking for you."
"Where were you? Did you go to Montana?" I ask.
"Think I'm going to tell you that? Like I could trust you with that information after you betrayed me?"
"If I betrayed you once, why would you trust me? Why would you force me to—"
"Because the Lord gave you to me. There is no question about where you belong. You belong in my house. In my bed. As my wife. Not with some piece of shit boy who thinks he's a man. I paid for you––you’re mine."
I shake my head, wiping my eyes with the palm of my hand. Refusing to cry over George’s words.
His words try to break me, but I've already been broken and beyond that, I'm already rising again. I’m a phoenix, born from the ashes of his own making and I’m not going to stand here and walk across fire for George.
No.
The only person I'm going to go to the flames for is James.
For our babies.
But not George. Not now, not ever.
"I'm not coming with you. You can't make me."
George laughs in my face, his breath as sour as it ever was. His hair gray and his body week.
But he's holding a gun.
And I'm only holding my heart.
He has the power to kill me. And after what they did to James, I don't doubt they’ll do it if they see fit.
But they will not take my children.
I can be strong. I can be strong.
I am strong.
"I will make you do as I say. You’re coming back to the compound and you're going to be taught a lesson."
"Don't do this, “I beg. “I'll never love you."
"No one is talking about love. We are talking about the Lord’s will. You are mine, dammit. And in God’s name alone I claim you as such."
I'm shaking now, my hands trembling, my bare legs threatening to collapse.
I will not fall.
I will not.
The gun is to my head, and the babies must sense my fear because they start crying, all of them at once.
The babies. My precious lambs. Hollering like wolves in the night.
"These babies aren't coming with us," George says with disgust, the spittle from his mouth flying. "I knew they were never mine. But I wasn't going to say anything around the other sister-wives."
His words prove to me what a coward he is. What cowards all these men are. Paying for young virgins, and claiming it’s God's will.
"Then you already know. You know I don't love you."
"I already told you, this isn't about love. This is about what is right. And you are rightfully my property."
I'm glad he realizes the babies aren't his. I don't want them to come in that van with me. Because if they do, I don't know if they will ever come back.
I couldn't bear that, to have them ripped from their father.
"Just take me then," I tell him, falling to his feet. This time I let myself fall because it's my one chance of saving the babies from this cult.
George pulls me up by my hands, dragging me from the cabin. Slamming the door. Shoving me in the van.
And then, before I can stop what's happening, we’re pulling out of the driveway, a blindfold is wrapped around my eyes, my wrists bound by rough rope. The tires peel out, spraying mud behind them, and carry us down the mountain.
My heart. My heart.
I thought it had broken so many times before but I didn't know what heartbreak was.
My babies. My James. They are my everything.
I have none of them.
This is worse than death.
This life I'm being led to is worse than it was in the past. Now they are going to make me pay.
James barely made it out alive when they punished him.
I don't know if my fate will be better or be worse.
Chapter Fourteen
The fact that I have triplets is astonishing—this is more than coincidence. This is mother fucking destiny.
Harper and Jackson can hardly believe it when I tell them Cherish had been up here all along over the last month with our children. Harper smacks me, tells me to stop messing with her.
She laughs and says there is something about this mountain that makes babies come faster than any other place on Earth. I don't think she's exaggerating.
When I explain that I’m not messing with her, she says she plans on coming up right away.
Jaxon smirks. “Holding those newborns better not give you baby fever.”
Harper sticks a tongue out at her husband, scrunching up her nose. “We’ll just see about that,” she says, her words telling everyone who’s the real boss in their house.
I tell her I appreciate it, considering I have a handful of errands to deal with in town and don’t want Cherish to be alone.
As I make my way down the mountain road, I think about all the things that need to get done today. My main goals are to get the phone line and electricity turned on, we may live in a ramshackle cabin, but we don't need to live like hillbillies.
It doesn’t take more than twenty minutes to get to town, and thankfully both the phone company and power company turn out to be quicker errands than I had thought they’d be. After I finish there, I stop at the market—I need to get some real food in my woman’s belly. She's been up here alone for a month, living on powdered milk and shit. It's time for her to be fed.
As I drive back to the cabin, I think how I'll work weekends and fix the cabin up right for her. For us. And I’ll take Jaxon up on his offer for a job as well. Between that and my savings, I’ll be able to care for my family.
I can't wait to walk through the door, and see my sister and Cherish together. With my errands done, I drive back up the mountain, ready to fry some bacon and gets some pancakes going on the griddle.
When I pull up to my uncle's cabin, a grin spreads upon my face. I see Harper's fancy ass sprinter van parked next to Cherish’s stolen vehicle.
I'm glad Harper could come up and keep Cherish company, I'm guessing they have a lot to catch up on. They go way back, we were all raised in the same church, kept company with the same people. And I'm hoping that the two of them can become friends. Maybe Harper can introduce her to the other women who live on the mountain––and I know seeing Honor would be good for Cherish too.
Before the car’s in park, Harper is running toward me, fear on her face.
"Oh my God,” she cries. “I’ve been trying to call you but my cell didn’t have service. And I couldn't just leave. I just—"
"Whoa, sister, what are you freaking out about?"
"She's gone!”
"What are you talking about?" I grab her hands and try to steady her. "Where is Cherish?"
"That's what I'm trying to tell you,” Harper cries. “She's gone. I went looking for her and but can't find her anywhere. I just don't understand. Her van is still here. The babies are––"
"Where are the babies?" I ask. "Where are my children?" Everything inside of me seizes. No, this cannot be happening. Not now. Not when everything was just beginning to make sense.
No. No. No.
Goddamnit.
"The babies are here," Harper says, trying to soothe me. "The babies are fine--"
She shakes her head, covering her face. "The babies are sleeping in their bassinets, but the door was swung wide open. She wouldn't have left. But look in the driveway." She points behind me and I turn to look.
That's when I see the tire marks in the soft mud, obviously new. Someone peeled out of here. Fast.
"We need to call the cops. Now," I tell Harper. "The church must have come back for her."
"How would they know?"
"I don't know, Harper," I shout—louder than I should. The last thing I want to do is startle her or the babies. But I'm torn up. "Go home, get Jaxon in case anything shady happens. I'll call the cops."
"Of course, but I can't leave you here."
We walk to the cabin, the babies whimpering, and I immediately pick one up. Andrew, I think. But I just met them last night. I rock him, immediately realizing he needs to be changed. And I realize they are all gonna be hungry soon.
"If we don't have Cherish back in an hour we're gonna need milk for the babies," I tell Harper.
She just shakes her head. "Three-month-olds can't have milk.They need formula." She exhales. "James, I'll take care of the babies. You drive down the mountain until you get cell service and call the cops, okay?”
___
Chapter Fifteen
When I get down to the station, they start questioning me. As if I might be involved, and the reason Cherish is missing. As they survey the crime scene, the babies need to stay at Harper and Jax’s for a few nights, and I crash there too. The whole time I can’t sleep. I’m all torn up. Having the woman I want given to me and then taken from me more than once is more than I can fucking take.
And now I have our children. I look at our three babies, crying all the time because all they want their mama, but she isn't here. I try to rock them to sleep, but I don't have that touch that Cherish does.
I hate to say it, but I feel slightly better knowing that Harper and her cronies, like Rosie and Honor and
Stella, can't do anything to calm the babies either. It's not just me. It's anyone who isn't mom.
But a few days later, I’m cleared by the police. My alibi was airtight, the footage at the hardware store proves I was there when Harper showed up at the house to find her gone. It doesn't change anything, though, Cherish is gone and there are no leads. I explain to the officers that Cherish told me the cult was headed to Montana to restart the compound. But Montana is a big fucking state. And it's not like I have anything else to go by. Of course, they promise to investigate, to follow any leads they may have. But I'm not holding my breath.
If I want to see my woman again then I have to find her myself.
Jaxon tries to talk me out of it: "You can’t go looking for her when you have her babies," he says.
But they aren’t just Cherish’s children. “They are my children too, and they need their mother.”
“They also need their father. And what are you going to do?” Jaxon asks. "Load those babies up in a van, driving up and down the interstate? It's a wild goose chase and you don’t know where you're going."
"Isn't that what love is?" I shake my head, furious. I'm sitting out on Jaxon's porch—the last place I want be. I want to be in my cabin, with my children and my woman. Not here. I'm ready for my life to begin, but one thing after another keeps happening. I'm tired of not having what I've wanted forever.
What I’m so fucking close to having.
"You can't load the babies up in a van," Jaxon says, softer now. “I know you know that, but sometimes it sounds like you're getting some harebrained idea in your mind."
“She is half of my heart."
"Are you sure you're not following your cock?" Jaxon asks.
I push Jax back because he doesn’t seem to understand what Cherish means to me. “No, I'm not following my fucking cock. How dare you to insinuate that?"
Jaxon raises his hands in the air. “Brother, I got your back, but you've only been here three days and already the mountain has lost its fucking cool.”
