by Aiden Bates
Zachary didn’t remember the movie, nor the date, and when he later watched the movie on his own while trying to pass the hours, he thought it was the most boring sap he’d even seen . . . not that he could remember ever seeing anything else.
He felt guilty about it, but for some reason, Dr. Nichols—Thomas—was annoying him. Maybe it was because Dr. Nichols was trying so hard to get Zachary to remember him. It felt . . . forced. Perhaps that was because Dr. Nichols was so worried.
Zachary also wondered who the shirtless man was on his camera. Was he cheating on someone with Dr. Nichols? The thought made him miserable, and he found himself being stiff when the doctor was around.
The doctor was being patient, though. He told Zachary that they should hold off from romance until Zachary was one-hundred-percent better. He also asked Zachary not to mention their relationship to anyone else.
“It could be perceived as a conflict of interests,” he explained as he peered into Zachary’s eye with a penlight for what felt like the hundredth time since the accident. “But we don’t have any other alternatives right now, do we? So let’s just keep it between us for now.”
Zachary felt both confusion and relief.
Chapter Twelve
“Up and at ‘em!”
A video played on the TV but Zachary’s eyes were closed. When Bastian tossed a bundle of clothes on top of him, Zachary’s eyes sprung open in alarm.
Bastian laughed then covered his mouth with his hands as if he felt bad.
“Sorry, man. Didn’t mean to scare you. But the nurse says you can go for a walk. I took the liberty of grabbing some clothes from your room. I hope you don’t mind.”
Zachary’s eyes went from startled to elated within half a second.
“Is the snow gone?” He started to tear off the white hospital gown before he even got an answer.
Bastian felt his face color as soon as he saw Zachary’s pecs—beautifully carved, he noticed—so he turned quickly and picked up an outdated People magazine while the patient got dressed.
“Uh, not exactly. We can’t leave the building. However, you may not remember this, but the building is pretty cool.” Bastian heard his voice get high, as if trying to sound tempting. “I thought I’d show you around.”
When the grunts of effort stopped, Bastian turned back. Zachary sat perched on the side of the cot, looking like an excited kid, his hair in disarray and his bandaged ankle dangling in the air.
The first stop was at the café for lunch. Bastian had the foresight to avoid the rush, thinking that it might be overwhelming for Zachary. When Bastian wheeled Zachary in, Holly rushed forward and gave Zachary a hug, her face bunched up in worry.
“We’re all prayin’ for you, honey,” she cooed, and then told him whatever he wanted was on the house. When he ordered a chicken pot pie, she exclaimed, “That’s just what you ordered last week! That’s a good sign!”
It was clear that Zachary’s spirits were lifting already.
The small talk was not great. Bastian considered that Zachary must not have a lot of the typical stuff to draw from, not knowing anything about his family, or where he grew up, or his job. As in introvert, Bastian hated small talk himself, and he struggled to fill the silence himself, telling Zachary about the people of Stellar and the interesting community.
“It’s a fun group,” he told Zachary. “There a frequent parties and social events. A lot of the residents are single, so everyone does a good job of making sure no one feels left out.”
“This kind of isolated environment must make it hard to find a date.”
Bastian considered that comment. He realized he didn’t really know, considering he hadn’t even looked for a date in the year since he’d been here.
“Probably so. But I think that’s the case for anyone who lives in Alaska.”
They were now exiting the elevator on the twelfth floor. Zachary had given up on his stubborn efforts to wheel himself around with his tired arms and allowed Bastian to push him.
“I’ll let you in on a secret,” Bastian began in a hushed tone, even though the corridor was completely empty except for the two of them. “There’s a swinger’s club—I guess that’s what you’d call it—in the building.”
“No way!” Zachary was suitable impressed.
“Yep. Apparently, some of the married couples get a little bored themselves, and like to get a little frisky. And from what I understand, they sometimes invite the singletons to join them.”
“Seriously? Have you—?”
Bastian laughed. “No, no, no. I would say no even if I had been invited. Not my scene. But I haven’t been asked. I guess they prefer to invite women.”
“Yeah. No one wants too much sausage at the party.”
Bastian laughed loudly. “I guess not.”
He unlocked the blank white door at the end of the hall, swung it open, and then pushed Zachary in before him.
“Holy shit . . . ” Zachary muttered, his tone more reverent than his words. “Sorry, it’s just . . . ”
“Magnificent?”
“Yeah. That’s . . . a word for it, all right.”
The Alaskan vista spread before them: snow-covered peaks and brilliant blue skies. It was the first day in almost a week that the sun had come out, and the empty unit’s floor-to-ceiling windows showcased the great outdoors beautifully. An ominous darkness was just shading the horizon—the new storm that everyone was talking about, which hadn’t decided if it was going to hit Stellar or not.
Bastian pushed Zachary forward to the window. It was as if Zachary was seeing the view for the first time, huge eyes darting around to capture everything. When the sun hit the snow, it glinted and sparkled, and the mountains looked straight out of a fairy tale. Bastian remembered his first day in Alaska well. He probably had the exact same look on his face that Zachary had now.
Zachary couldn’t tear his eyes from the view.
Bastian couldn’t tear his eyes from Zachary’s face.
It wasn’t just that Zachary was an exceptionally handsome man, with his luminous gray eyes and strong jaw. It was the wonder and intelligence that he projected, even while saying nothing. And his smell—good God—away from the antiseptic odors of the clinic, his omega smell wafted into Bastian’s receptive nose and was nothing short of arousing.
Don’t get hard now, he told himself, and then he immediately remembered that he couldn’t if he wanted to.
Bastian wondered if Zachary was into sports. He certainly looked like the kind of rugged, hot, outdoorsy type who would be comfortable on skis or even a snowboard. Considering the steep slopes before them, Bastian shivered. No way.
After enjoying the view, they wandered around the building, meeting the same people and seeing the same locations that Zachary no doubt saw when he first came to Stellar. He remembered none of it, and might remember none of it tomorrow, but he seemed to be thoroughly enjoying the tour.
Zachary charmed everyone he met, with his adorable smile and his wide-eyed interest in everything around him. It said a lot about his character that he remained so positive despite not really knowing what was going on. Bastian wondered if he himself would be so upbeat.
By the time dinner rolled around, Zachary’s smile remained but his eyes were hooded with exhaustion and pain. A resident was carrying in his dinner as they arrived back at the clinic. Bastian helped Zachary back into bed, then got him a glass of water and his pain pill.
Within ten minutes, Zachary was passed out, the pain gone and a faint smile on his lips. As always, Bastian stayed the night, occasionally looking up from his book to check on the patient, the handsome patient whom he was growing more and more attracted to by the day.
***
The storm passed them by.
The atmosphere in the building was almost like a twelve-story high party with everyone cheerful—ecstatic, even—that Mother Nature decided to give them a break. A voluntary crew of strong people with shovels were outside already, clearing away the me
lting slush from sidewalks.
Bastian peeked outside and was surprised that it felt almost warm, in the high fifties and sunny. No doubt, they’d be able to leave the building the next day, and the phones would be back on soon.
He couldn’t wait to tell Zachary.
And Zachary reacted just as enthusiastically as Bastian hoped, with lots of “thank gods!” and hoots and a demand to be driven around the next day.
Bastian didn’t have to be asked twice, calling the rental place across the street and booking a Jeep. The roads might still be rough, but he wasn’t going to let that deter from being Zachary’s hero . . . because that’s what Zachary called him, “my hero.” Bastian thought he’d melt.
Thus Bastian planned their adventure together to the nines: blankets and a pillow so that Zachary would be comfortable and warm in the passenger seat; one of Zachary’s cameras in case he suddenly recalled his talent; several hours of pop music, classic rock, and indie favorites to enjoy and hopefully pique Zachary’s memory; snacks and drinks in a small cooler; and one fabulous lunch of everything good that Carl still had in the grocery—some fancy cheeses, a bottle of castelvetrano olives, crispy chicken (that Bastian baked the night before), and since there was no bread or fresh fruit left in grocery, a box of Ritz crackers and some canned pineapple rings. There was also one bottle of chardonnay, which was disappointingly cheap, but Bastian hoped it would do for a casual lunch. In Bastian’s mind, it could either be a fun lunch between friends, or an incredibly romantic gesture. It all depended on how Zachary felt about Bastian.
As Bastian wheeled him out to the Jeep the next morning, residents were hesitantly exploring the area outside, looking for damages and breathing in the fresh air for the first time in days. Children were playing in the yard, making mushy snowballs and snow angels from what remained, while their teachers tried to force lessons on weather patterns. The kids ignored the teachers and the teachers finally just smiled, happy to be getting a little sun on their faces. Three different phone company trucks were visible just from the parking lot of Stellar Landing, as its trained employees worked hard to get the town connected again.
The two men stopped for a moment next to the Jeep, and also enjoyed the brisk air and the sunshine. That darkness still hung around the horizon, but it was retreating from them, said the local meteorologist. Perhaps the Alaskan summer could start in earnest now.
As he helped Zachary get into the car, the cast on his foot making him awkward and unbalanced, Bastian told him about Alaskan summers—valleys of wild flowers, excellent fishing, and days that sometimes got up to eighty degrees. If one drove to the fjords, sometimes orcas could be seen, enjoying the calm, warm waters.
“If you’re still here, you will have to go the strait and see the fields of fireweed. Vivid purple, like a plush carpet. It would make for some gorgeous photos.”
Perhaps it was Bastian’s imagination, but when he mentioned photography, a scared look came over Zachary’s face, but just for a fleeting second. It wasn’t the first time this had happened, either. Bastian’s heart hurt for him—there must be so much fear in not remembering who you were, even in your very core.
Bastian decided not to mention photography again, not until Zachary regained his memory. Hopefully what they saw today would only bring Zachary happiness.
It certainly seemed like that was the case. As they headed down the newly cleared roads and into the forest, Zachary’s oohs and ahhs could be heard on a regular basis. A group of caribou were wading in a stream, enjoying a fresh drink, resulting in an unexpected squeal of joy. Every new mountain view from every new corner elicited a gasp of appreciation. Once inside the boundaries of the state park, more animals could be seen from the road, including a huge musk ox. Bastian had never seen one in his brief time in Alaska, and Zachary was almost apoplectic with joy. Bastian pulled the Jeep to a quiet stop and they watched in awe as the beast lumbered slowly away.
Finally, they arrived at their destination. It was a surprise, and Bastian was holding his breath, not sure if the recent crazy weather was going to ruin it. Fortunately, this part of the huge park had not been hit by the blizzard, and the paths were clear. A small sign read To Glacier Caves, but Zachary didn’t even seem to notice it, looking around as he was like a small child at the zoo. He still needed the wheelchair and was bundled up almost comically, but his energy was so high that Bastian half-expected him to leap out of the chair and go bounding down the path. But no, he stayed put, and even offered to carry that bag of lunch supplies on his lap.
Thanks to the Americans with Disabilities Act, the trail from the parking lot to the caves was smooth and easy to follow. They moved slowly and spoke softly so that they could catch as much wildlife as possible. The birds were taking full advantage of the warmer weather, singing and making nests. Bastian watched Zachary for any sign of recognition—birds were why he was here, after all—but saw nothing but passive pleasure.
At the end of the trail was a dock, and attached to the dock was a manned ferry, a relatively small thing that could probably carry a few cars if it needed to. Instead, it just carried Zachary and Bastian across a clear, rock-lined lake to the other side, where they started up another path.
This time, Zachary did not miss the signs.
“Glacier caves?” he asked. “Is that . . . caves in glaciers? Like, ice caves?”
“Indeed. I didn’t want to get your hopes too high up. If the cave floors are smooth, we should be able to go inside with the wheel chair. If there’s a lot of debris, though . . . ”
But the cave floors were smooth, gloriously so, and shiny. As they stepped inside the mouth of the cave, Zachary let out an excited yell that echoed back to them a few times. The glass-like ice all around them—dry and unaffected by the spring sun due to its thickness—lent a bluish cast to everything. It was magical.
It was also freezing, much colder than the air outside the caves. Bastian had the foresight to borrow extra coats and hats from Aaron, but even so, they both were shivering within fifteen minutes. Neither seemed to want to go back, but they had to.
“Absolutely amazing,” was all Zachary could say, as they turned for a last glance into the gaping maw of the cave. In better physical condition, with more hardcore gear, one could explore for hours. It was impressive enough just to spend half an hour there.
“The unfortunate thing is that the caves happened when the glaciers started melting. This beauty is fleeting.”
The two men were quiet for a moment, as if absorbing that grim fact and what it meant for the wilderness of Alaska.
In the trees, the sunshine was not as brilliant, and every once in a while, a frigid blast of air rushed past them. That was part of the charm of spring in Alaska—you could be warm one minute and cold the next. Bastian’s goal was to get them to a place known as Flat Rock by noon for lunch. Flat Rock was—get this—a large, flat rock, out in the open where it and anyone on top of it could absorb the sunshine. With any luck, they would be able to continue watching the wildlife as they ate their meal. And with extra luck, Zachary would appreciate how much care Bastian had put into that one little meal.
Bastian was huffing by the time they reached their destination. The path had gotten slightly muddy, offering some resistance, and it became harder to push the wheelchair. It was worth it, though, and he would be well-rested by the time they had to head back to the Jeep.
From the path to the top of the rock was just a few steps up an easy incline, and Zachary leaned on Bastian as he hopped up. As soon as his head cleared and he saw the beautiful valley below, he gasped and flung his arms out in his excitement . . . causing himself to lose his balance.
Bastian grabbed at him, but the sleekness of the slippery nylon coat he was wearing didn’t give him a solid grip, and Zachary landed on his side hard against the unforgiving rock.
Bastian felt a different kind of cold course through him as he hurried to Zachary’s side.
“It’s just my hip,” Zachary said, pant
ing from pain, barely able to speak. “Just . . . hurts . . . like a motherfucker . . . ”
Bastian laughed with relief at Zachary’s swearing, glad that his friend wasn’t more severely injured. But he was still worried. It would be a painful ride back in the wheelchair, and even in the Jeep after that.
They decided to sit and eat anyway. Bastian needed to get his strength up. He took off his coat now that they were in the sunshine, and created a pillow for Zachary to lean on, off of his battered hip.
“I feel like a Persian prince,” Zachary joked, but Bastian could still hear the pain in his voice.
The sunshine helped, but it was still chilly. Bastian tried not to let on that he was shivering. They ate quickly, the “romantic” foods that Bastian had picked out now just cold foods, but Bastian hoped the fat content from the cheese and olives would warm them up.
“I brought this for you,” Bastian lied, holding up the bottle of chardonnay. “I shouldn’t, since I’m driving. But maybe it will dim the pain a little?” He poured some into a plastic cup, and Zachary accepted it gratefully. It was gone in seconds, and Bastian poured him another. He certainly couldn’t blame him.
After another long pull of the wine, Zachary got a thoughtful look. “How far away are we from Stellar?”
“Only about fifty miles. I took it slow so we could look around, but on clear days, you can make it here in less than an hour.”
“I was just noticing how we seemed to have followed the storm,” Zachary said, pointing to the horizon to their right. “It’s darker than it was earlier.”
Bastian hadn’t noticed. Earlier, they were in the trees and in the cave, and since they made it to the rock, all his attention had been on Zachary. He turned toward the west, and then swore under his breath.
“We’ve got to get out of here,” he said, standing quickly and throwing things into the bad.
“What’s wrong?” Zachary looked alarmed, and he struggled to right himself, wincing as he did so.
