Catching Caroline (Silver Falls Book 1)

by Megan Nugen Isbell

  Twenty-Six

  The door to the restaurant opened and I turned to see the face of my cousin. We hadn’t spoken. Not since I left her in the parking lot. The last time I’d seen her was in my rearview mirror, looking bewildered and stunned. Now, she looked nervous and timid, which was not something I was used to with Erica. I wasn’t expecting her today, which meant she was here to talk to me. That was the only time she ever came by The Silver Falls House unless she was working.

  “Hey,” she said, walking slowly towards me.

  “Hey,” I said back and then it grew quiet for a few moments as we just looked at each other.

  “You’re just about to get off, aren’t you?” she asked and I nodded.

  “In about five minutes actually.”

  “Can you meet me for coffee when you’re done?”

  “Um, yeah,” I hesitated.

  “Okay. I’ll be at the coffee shop then,” she said and then turned and walked out.

  I stood for a moment, watching Erica through the window until she was in her car and driving away before I went and cleaned up my last table that had just left. I didn’t know what Erica wanted to talk to me about. She’d said plenty during our last conversation.

  I finished cleaning up and after kissing my grandmother on the cheek, I headed to meet Erica at Silver Falls Coffee, a small place that served coffee and pastries. Unlike the rest of New England, Silver Falls had yet to get a Dunkin Donuts. I was certain we were the only town left without one.

  Her car was in the parking lot when I pulled in and I could see her sitting in the window. She turned her head, seeing me pull in. Our eyes met and then I got out, opening the door to the sound of a jingling bell. The girl behind the counter smiled at me. I smiled back and headed straight for the booth Erica was sitting in.

  “I ordered you an iced mocha,” she said, pushing the cup towards me.

  “Thanks,” I said, taking a sip and then it grew awkwardly silent.

  “Busy day at the restaurant?” she asked finally and I shook my head.

  “Not especially so,” I answered and it grew quiet again.

  “Listen, Caroline,” she sighed. “I’m no good at this. You know I’m not, so I’m just gonna come out and say it. I’m sorry about the other day. I’m sorry for upsetting you. I was a total bitch and I’m sorry.”

  I could see the remorse on Erica’s face and she looked across the table at me nervously, waiting for me to speak.

  “It’s okay,” I finally said. Even when it’d been happening, I knew she hadn’t meant to hurt me. Just like Sawyer, she was only thinking of me.

  “It’s not okay, Caroline. I feel horrible. All I want is for you to be happy and if you think Adam will make you happy, I shouldn’t be saying anything that would stop that for you. I guess I was just totally taken off guard. I didn’t expect it. I thought you’d have a little fun with him. I really didn’t expect you to say you’d fallen in love with the guy, but if you say you’re in love with him, I wish you only the best.” She was talking quickly, the way she always did when she was anxious. I reached over and placed my hand over hers and I felt her relax.

  “Thank you for apologizing. I forgive you.” I smiled over to Erica and I could see the relief wash over her face.

  “I hate when we’re mad at each other,” she said.

  “Me too,” I said, smiling at her again. “And I have to apologize too…for the way I spoke to you.”

  “You were only putting me in my place, which I totally deserved.”

  “You didn’t deserve to be called a bitch.”

  “Yeah, I did, because I was one,” she scoffed.

  “No, you weren’t. You were just looking out for me. You’re worried about me, Erica, and you have no idea what that means to me, to know I have someone like you in my corner.”

  “I love you, Caroline. You’re like the sister I always wanted,” she said and I started laughing.

  “You have a sister,” I said, referring to my cousin, Lori, Erica’s older sister.

  “I said you’re like the sister I always wanted. I never wanted Lori. She’s horrible,” Erica said, pursing her lips and I laughed again.

  “I won’t tell her you said that,” I said, smiling over to her again and it grew quiet for a few seconds until Erica sighed.

  “Really though, Care. I am sorry and I hope you will be happy,” she said and I suddenly found my smile that had been coming so easily, dropping now as my eyes stared down at the table. “What is it? Did I say something wrong again?”

  “No,” I said quietly.

  “Then why do you suddenly look like someone killed your cat?” she asked and I looked up at her.

  “Because I’m scared.”

  “What are you afraid of?”

  “That everything you and Sawyer said is true.”

  “Wait,” she said abruptly. “Sawyer knows?”

  “Yeah. He walked in when Adam and I were kissing.”

  “Shit,” she said softly. “That must’ve been incredibly weird.”

  “He lost his mind, Erica. I’ve never seen him so angry,” I said, replaying the whole scene in my head, causing a knot in my stomach.

  “What’d he say?” she asked.

  “That Adam’s a liar. Only cares about himself. That he’ll break my heart. You know, the basic big brother pep talk,” I said, trying to laugh, but when I looked at Erica, I saw her mouth was in a straight line.

  “And compounded with what I said really messed with your head, didn’t it?” she asked softly and I nodded hesitantly. “Don’t listen to us, Caroline,” she said adamantly. “What the hell do I know about men anyway? I’m pathetic when it comes to relationships. I can’t keep a guy to save my life, so don’t listen to a damn word I have to say. I’m going to grow old alone and end up as the crazy cat lady, so anything I say, just let it in one ear and out the other.”

  “Don’t say that!” I said quickly. “You are not going to turn into the crazy cat lady and you are not going to be an old maid.”

  “Yes, I will, Caroline. Men are too weird. I always find something wrong with them, so unless Prince Charming comes along, and I mean the actual Prince Charming, there is no hope for me.” Erica was always so animated and I couldn’t help but chuckle when her eyes got big and she puffed out her cheeks. “Face it, I’m allergic to relationships.”

  “Because you choose to be,” I told her and she rolled her eyes. “Stop being so picky and realize what a catch you are. You’re amazing, Erica. You’re hilarious and gorgeous…”

  She started laughing out loud.

  “Stop, Caroline. Please!” she said, still cracking up.

  “What’s so funny?”

  “You trying to boost my confidence like some motivational speaker. I’m not hilarious and I’m not gorgeous. I’m just me,” she said and I leaned across the table to look into her eyes.

  “And that’s why someday you’re going to find someone who sees you for the amazing woman you are because you are you and there’s no one else in the world like Erica Hale.”

  I watched as a timid smile spread on my cousin’s face. She never showed her vulnerable side. She never talked about wanting to find someone serious. She seemed perfectly content hopping from man to man, having her fun and then moving on to the next shiny new toy, but I knew better. She wanted that special someone, that one person who loved her above anything else and I knew someday she’d find him.

  “Enough of this shit,” she said with a laugh and I knew our conversation about her was over. “We are not talking about me. We’re talking about you. Now back to your brother. He’s pissed. What’s he doing about it?”

  “He made Adam leave. He doesn’t want anything to do with him,” I said quietly. “I can’t let that happen though. They’ve been best friends their whole lives. I can’t be the reason that changes.”

  “I think the reasons are deeper than just you,” Erica said and I nodded. I knew that too, but I’d exacerbated the problem.

&n
bsp; “Still, I can’t have Sawyer hating Adam.”

  “Maybe he just needs to settle down and once he sees that Adam isn’t the asshole Sawyer thinks he is, he’ll be okay.”

  “Maybe,” I said despondently and Erica raised an eyebrow at me.

  “You’re still afraid that Sawyer’s right though; that Adam’s going to break your heart.”

  I looked up from the table top to meet Erica’s eyes and I nodded.

  “I don’t want to believe it. I don’t want to think it, but…I can’t help it.”

  “Do you think Adam loves you?” she asked and I didn’t hesitate when I nodded.

  “I do. I feel it when I’m with him. I’ve never felt this way about anyone. Not even Caleb, which is why I’m so afraid. He’s Adam DeLain and I’m just Caroline from Silver Falls. What can I offer him?” I asked softly and this time Erica took my hand.

  “You. You can offer him you because that’s what he wants and I, for one, happen to think you’re pretty damn special.”

  She squeezed my hand and smiled over to me.

  “Who’s the motivational speaker now?” I said with a laugh. “But thank you, Erica. I needed to hear that, especially before we leave tomorrow morning.”

  “Leave?” she asked.

  “I’m going with him to Boston. He’s got an appointment and he wants me to see his place and show me around the city.”

  “A weekend alone in Boston with Adam DeLain,” she said, coyly. “I do believe you’re about to start living that fairy tale, my dear cousin.”

  I started to laugh, but it faded quickly.

  “It could be a disaster,” I said and she shook her head.

  “I don’t think so and even if it is, I’m sure you’ll get some good sex out of it,” she said and I burst out laughing, my face turning bright red.

  “Shut up!” I exclaimed, reaching over and slapping her on the arm.

  “Don’t hit me!” she said, rubbing it dramatically.

  “I will hit you if you keep talking like that.”

  “And I’ll hit you if you don’t start talking. I’m still waiting for details ever since you slept with him. Size, girth, stamina? I need to know because I’ve got to see if it’s close to what I’ve been picturing in my head.”

  “You’re crazy, Erica. Like certifiably insane.”

  “That may be, but my sick mind still needs to know.”

  “Well, you’re going to have to settle for whatever images your warped mind has created because you’re not getting any details from me.”

  “Well,” she scoffed, “all I can say is that based on what I’ve seen of the rest of his body and what I’ve seen in my mind’s eye, you’re a very lucky woman, Caroline Hale, and I’m surprised you can even walk anymore.”

  We both started laughing then and I knew we were okay again. Erica was back to being her crass, inappropriate self and I loved it. Now, if only I could find a way to fix things with Sawyer and get rid of the pit in my stomach.

  Twenty-Seven

  I wasn’t sure when Adam had arrived, but when I looked out the window, his truck was sitting in front of the house. I knew he was coming over soon. We had to leave for Boston, but I thought he would’ve texted me when he pulled in. The cab was empty and then my eyes drifted to the barn. I knew he was in there. I knew he had to be talking to Sawyer.

  A knot formed in my stomach and I made my way quickly downstairs. There was no telling what kind of stunt my brother was going to pull and part of me feared he might actually punch Adam. I needed to get out there and play referee before either of them did something they’d regret.

  I walked quickly towards the barn and when I walked inside, I instantly heard my brother’s voice, causing me to stop in my tracks. I couldn’t see them. They were in one of the stalls that was blocked from my view, but I had no trouble hearing them.

  “I can’t stop her from going with you, Adam, but I’m sure as hell not going to give you my damn blessing,” he said. He wasn’t yelling, which I took as a good sign, but his voice was harsh and I knew he was still upset.

  “I don’t expect you to, Sawyer, but I couldn’t go without at least trying to talk to you about this.”

  “What the hell do you want me to say? You’re lucky I didn’t start beating the shit out of you when you walked through that door.”

  “You don’t have to say anything.”

  “I can’t believe you’ve even got the balls to show your face to me right now after I walked in with your damn hands all over my sister.”

  “Sawyer, please…” Adam said.

  “How could you fuckin’ do this to me? She’s my sister for Christ’s sakes and I know how you are! Why would I ever want Caroline with someone like you?”

  “Because I care about her. I was nervous as hell to walk in here and talk to you because I know you’re pissed, but I needed you to know I care about her, Sawyer. I love her and you know I’ve never said that to a woman in my damn life, so your sister must be something pretty special, don’t you think? This isn’t a game to me. I know you think it is. I know what kind of man you think I am, but I’m not what you think I am. She’s different. You know that. She’s always been different,” Adam said and I could hear the strain in his voice as he spoke to my brother.

  “What the hell do you mean by that?” Sawyer was getting angry again and I felt my muscles tensing up. I shouldn’t be eavesdropping. I shouldn’t be intruding on their private conversation. It wasn’t right, but I couldn’t stop myself.

  “Caroline…she’s...she’s special, Sawyer. You know she is. Ever since we were kids I’ve felt the need to protect her, to make sure she was okay. We both did. She’s always been there…in my head. Thoughts of her popping into my mind over the years for no reason at all. I’ve always loved her. You know I have. That love is just different now. When I came back here and saw her again, it changed. I didn’t mean for this to happen and I never want to hurt her, man. You have to know that.”

  Sawyer was quiet and my heart was pounding listening to Adam tell my brother how he felt about me. I knew he was right. Something had always been there between us. Looking back, I knew the seed had been planted since we were kids. It’d only grown as we grew up. I guess we just hadn’t been aware of it. When he left Silver Falls, I thought he wanted to leave us all behind, but he’d taken a piece of me with him.

  “I can’t do this right now,” Sawyer finally grumbled. “I’ve got work to do. Not one damn hair better be hurt on Caroline’s head this weekend. If anything happens to her, I swear to God, I’ll beat your ass so hard you’ll never throw another goddamn baseball again.”

  I felt my heart sink. As I stood listening to their conversation, I prayed Sawyer would soften towards Adam. It broke my heart to know the two of them were fighting and all because of me.

  “You know I’ll keep her safe,” Adam said.

  “Go fuck yourself, Adam!” I heard Sawyer shout, but then I heard Adam’s feet scraping against the dirt on the barn floor and I turned quickly and ran outside. I didn’t want him to know I’d heard the conversation between him and Sawyer.

  I knew I couldn’t make it all the way back to the house before Adam came out and so I stopped halfway and then started walking slowly back to the barn, hoping he’d be coming out soon, making our meeting appear accidental. My plan worked because a few seconds later, Adam appeared, the despondent look on his face more prominent than I’d imagined as I eavesdropped, but when he saw me, his expression changed and I wondered if he was just putting on a show or if he was genuinely happy to see me. I forced a smile on my face so he wouldn’t know that beneath my façade, my heart was a mix of emotions: breaking from hearing how cruel my brother had been to him, but soaring hearing how he’d always cared for me.

  “I didn’t know you were here already,” I said, stopping in front of him and taking both of his hands.

  “I got here a few minutes ago. I wanted to try and talk to Sawyer,” he said and I watched as his mouth dipped down into a
frown.

  “How’d that go?” I asked quietly, even though I knew exactly how it’d gone.

  “Not bad. Better than I expected,” he said and I knew he was lying. There was no way the exchange between them could ever be described as not bad, unless in his mind, ending a conversation by one person telling the other to go fuck themselves was a term of endearment.

  “I’m sorry our relationship is putting such a strain on yours and Sawyer’s,” I said softly.

  “Don’t be sorry. We’ll work it out. I’ve just gotta prove myself to him. I at least owe him that,” he said and I nodded. “It’ll be okay, Caroline. Don’t stress about this. We’re going to have an amazing weekend in Boston.” He was smiling again and then he leaned in, kissing me softly and I could only hope he was right. “Are you almost ready to go?”

  “Yeah. I’m ready. I’ll just grab my bag,” I said, motioning to the house.

  “Need any help?” he asked, but I shook my head.

  “I still have to grab my shampoo and stuff. Just gimme a sec and I’ll be right out,” I told him. He pulled me to him for a quick kiss and then I trotted up the steps and into the house. I went to the bathroom and grabbed my shampoo and makeup, putting them into my bag and going back downstairs. I locked the door and saw Adam was sitting in the truck. It was running and he was waiting for me. I walked down the steps and opened the passenger door.

  “Ready?” he asked and I nodded, tossing my bag into the back seat.

  “Yeah,” I said, smiling at him, but then I felt my smile fade when I caught sight of my brother. He was standing by the barn, staring over at the truck, his mouth in a straight line and his brow furrowed. Our eyes locked for a moment and then I turned back to Adam. “Can you give me a sec? I need to talk to him.”

  “Yeah,” he said, his eyes drifting over to Sawyer too. “Go ahead, Caroline.”

  I reached over, taking his hand for a moment before I closed the door and started slowly towards my brother. His arms were folded guardedly when I approached him and I stood in front of him for a few awkward seconds.