The important thing, though, was that anyone looking for us would have to enter the shrine to find us, and even then it wouldn't be easy in the dim light. We could relax, just a little. I didn't have to keep it all inside any more.
As soon as I relaxed my self-control, though, the feelings I'd been pushing down overwhelmed me. And unlike Kadran, I didn't know a trick to bring them under control again. My legs wobbled and my vision blurred with tears as the fear, the shock, the everything overwhelmed me in a rush of emotion. I let out a sob and felt my knees buckle under me.
11
Kadran
Amy's sob caught me by surprise, but I was by her side as she started to sink to the floor. My arms were around her before I could even think about it, cradling her soft body and holding her to me.
Hungry Stars devour me, I was so caught up in my own pain that I didn't see how much distress she is in. I should have known better. I did know better — I had my own experience to draw on, and if it wasn't the same as hers I could at least empathize.
"It will be alright," I told her, speaking softly and stroking her hair. That seemed to help, and she hugged me back hard. If there were words in what she was saying, I couldn't make them out. "All will be well, I am here to protect you."
Carefully, I lowered her to the shrine's hard floor, undoing the pack she'd strapped to her back. It wasn't easy to do one-handed, but I wasn't about to let go of Amy when she needed me.
She's not used to this kind of adventure, I reminded myself. It was hard to remember that. Since my childhood I'd been thrust into one dangerous situation after another, thanks to the humans who'd snatched me from my home.
The humans who had forced me into service, trained me and used me. The humans whose living goddess towered over us as a statue, smiling down benevolently. Humans who had destroyed my family and taken my homeworld from me.
I could blame humans for every bad thing in my life. This human, though, had never been off her homeworld before I took her from it.
The fury in my blood wanted to call that revenge for my own experience, but that was unworthy of a warrior. It was the humans of the Silent Empire who I owed my vengeance and Amy wasn't one of them. In any case, it was impossible to take any satisfaction in her misery. My heart ached to see her suffer, quenching my anger.
Shaking, Amy clung to me, pressing her tearstained face against my body.
"You will be alright, I promise," I told her, speaking softly and sliding my hand through her soft hair in what I hoped was a soothing gesture. "I will keep you safe."
"I want to go home," she said, voice indistinct against my chest. Taking a deep breath she pulled away, dragging the back of her hand across her face to wipe away the tears. "Safe is one thing, but I've got to get back. You don't have to help me, you've done enough, but I am going to go home."
The fierce anger in her voice was a surprise but her tear-filled eyes blazed with it. I knew that reaction well, though I hadn't expected to see it in a human. The fear and pain were still there, buried under the rage she was glaring at me, but she wasn't going to let fear rule her.
That fierceness is going to get her in trouble, I thought. This human wasn't going to back down and in a place like this that could get her killed. I'd seen her combat skills, or lack of them.
On the other hand, I couldn't fault her for her anger. I'd just have to stop the consequences from catching her.
"Listen to me," I said, looking her in the eyes. "I understand. You want to fight anyone between you and your home. Let me try to get us both out of here safely, though, and then we can work out what happens next."
"You aren't going to take me back to Earth," she said, glaring. "If you were, you'd have said so before."
"I can't take you home." She was right and there was no point in denying it. "It's against all the rules of the ASP, and for good reason. I know that won't satisfy you, Amy, but you won't get home if you get yourself captured. You don't know this place or its culture, you don't know how to ask for what you want."
Her lips tightened and her eyes narrowed. I hurried on before she decided to do something we'd both regret. "You're not my prisoner. You may come and go as you please, and do whatever you like. All I'm asking is that you take the time to think about your actions and make a plan. If you just storm off now, nothing good will come of it. You'll be captured at best and killed at worst."
I looked her in the eye, hoping she'd see how serious I was. Silence hung in the shine, stretching out until Amy let out a sigh.
"Fine. I'll wait, I won't go charging off. But you'd better not be playing me — if you're keeping me here for yourself, you'll regret it."
Her suspicion cut deep and I hid a wince. It wasn't true, of course, but I could understand why she might think so. It was up to me to give her a reason to trust me. Drawing myself up to my full height, I looked down at the Earthwoman and placed a fist over my heart. "Seven Divine Graces witness, I am giving you the best advice I know. I swear I will always act in your best interest, Amy of Earth, and may the Hungry Stars devour me if I break this oath."
She wouldn't know the importance of the formal oath, but I did. I was a warrior of the Ikarna Temple, and I would not betray it or its teachings. Some of that clearly carried through my tone: Amy nodded reluctantly, accepting my words.
"Okay, I'll trust you for now. You did get me off the slave ship, and I do owe you for that. And I know that you are trying to help, Kadran." She sighed, turning away and pushing the hair out of her face again. "But that won't hold me forever, understand?"
"I do, and I have no desire to cower here at the feet of the Empress," I assured her. "Just until I can contact my base and get some backup. Then, once we're out of danger, I promise that we will see what we can do about getting you home."
The thought of that hurt, and I tried to push it down. This wasn't the time to worry about what I felt. The same advice I'd given her applied to me as well: first get out of danger, then worry about the next step. We had enough problems facing us already.
I turned away, looking around the shrine. There were only two ways in, and that was counting the giant hole the battle had torn in the wall. Good news and bad at the same time. I had no way to watch multiple entrances, so limited access helped there. But if someone did attack us we had no easy route to retreat by. We had to trust that the ship-priest was right and no one would come here.
"I'm going to scout the area around us," I announced. "I won't go far, I just need to know that we're secure. And see what facilities are nearby that we can use."
Amy nodded and I thought I could see relief in her eyes. We both needed a little distance from this conversation.
"I'll set up here, then," she said, crouching by her pack and pulling it open. "It's not much, but I've got some food. And a sleeping bag — I'm not sure how long it's been since I slept."
Reluctantly, I left Amy behind. I wouldn't go far, I promised myself — if someone did come looking for her, I'd be able to get back in a heartbeat. But that wasn't the worry that consumed me. I knew all too well how off balance someone away from their homeworld for the first time could be, and Amy's emotional rollercoaster was familiar. She no doubt intended to keep her word and stay put for now... but that didn't mean that she would.
I have to trust her. If I don't, why should she trust me? It wasn't easy, not when I knew that she was torn by such a fierce storm of emotions. But she also needed some time to herself, without me breathing down her neck. If I sat there staring at her constantly she'd never make the adjustments she needed to.
Besides, we really did need to know the layout of the surrounding area. Not just in case we needed to leave in a hurry, though that was important. We also needed to know where certain facilities were. Like a bathroom, for starters. Fortunately, that was easy to find. One advantage of the Empire — no Prince wanted the commoners aboard his ship to be filthy.
The nearest was just around the corner from the shrine, and while it was basic it would d
o. It even had a vibroshower for washing in. A quick run through that made me feel a little better, and I expected Amy would appreciate it too. She hadn't had a chance to wash since leaving Earth, and mud still caked her beautiful golden hair.
Stop thinking of her like that, I commanded myself with a little shiver. It was difficult enough being this close to the human without letting my thoughts stray in that direction. Yes, she was beautiful. More beautiful than any woman I'd ever seen. But I needed to focus on keeping her safe, on protecting her. Anything else was a distraction that I couldn't afford and she wouldn't appreciate.
Are you sure about that? A treacherous part of my mind thought differently, but I pushed it down ruthlessly. I was good at that, by training and inclination. I'd spent my life hiding my thoughts and my feelings from everyone, even myself.
Now was not the time to let them out unfiltered. Amy's collapse showed me what could happen if I did. Getting control back over my emotions, I returned to the shrine.
Amy was still there, thank the Graces. She'd set up a little camp, a small stack of food packs beside her, but evidently she'd been too tired to prepare any. I found her slumped against the statue's pedestal, her eyes closed and a sleeping bag pulled over her as a makeshift blanket.
It clearly had been too long since she'd last slept. I looked down at her, seeing her peaceful expression, and smiled. She looked so sweet like that, the ferocity gone from her face, and it suited her. Tomorrow will be soon enough for any more conversation, I decided. Careful not to wake her, I wrapped her in the sleeping bag and zipped it up. Let her rest — she needed it.
12
Amy
Huddled in my sleeping bag I woke slowly, drifting in the darkness. Weird dreams flickered through my mind as I tried to remember where I was. Camping? That sounded right, but the ground didn't feel like the forest floor. And the air felt too warm, too dry. There was no sound of wind in the trees.
My eyes flickered open and I looked up at the giant statue rising to the ceiling high above. Oh. Right. It wasn't a dream.
Shit.
Sitting up, I blinked sleep from my eyes and looked around, trying to suppress the burst of panic. That was one way to wake up quick in the morning, and if I could bottle the experience I'd make a fortune selling it on Earth. If I ever saw Earth again.
Trying to ignore that thought I focused on the room, looking for my protector. Kadran stood in front of the hole into space, moving slowly and purposefully. And soooo distractingly. He seemed to glide across the floor, extending his arms in slow-motion punches, sliding a leg out in a low sweep, darting forward and back. It was a beautiful, incredible display of skill and grace.
I had no idea what I was watching. Some kind of martial art? Or maybe a dance? Both? It didn't matter, at that moment it was a welcome distraction from my confused haze of worry. And, to be honest, I would have stared anyway. He'd stripped down to the waist and the beautiful play of muscles on his torso made me bite my lip as I stared.
Don't be weird about this, I told myself. Don't just stare at him.
It didn't help, I couldn't tear my eyes off him. I tried to tell myself it was because he was an alien, but that excuse hadn't been convincing the day before and it was no better now. But god, those abs! And the grace, the smooth control he had over his body as he moved. It was like a dance, if a dance could kill.
My heart started to race as I sat up and watched. Kadran didn't seem to have noticed me, his focus on his deadly dance, and with every move he sped up a little until I could barely follow the movements. It was a blur of dodges and parries and attacks, each one precise and controlled.
I'd been impressed watching him fight on the Red King's Revenge, but this? This was awe-inspiring.
Okay, Amy. If he wants to keep you safe, stick close to him, because you're never going to find a better bodyguard.
I shivered, flustered. That wasn't the only reason I wanted to stay close to him, but I really didn't want to think about how attracted I was to that perfect body. Just thinking about what he could do to me with that much focus and precision...
No. Stop it. I said I don't want to think about it.
With a final whip-fast kick, Kadran spun to a stop facing the starry void and bowed. He held the pose for a long moment and then straightened, exhaling in a sigh before turning back toward me. He glowed in the starlight, sweat-slick body gleaming, his chest rising and falling in deep even breaths.
I couldn't tear my eyes off him. And the intensity of his gaze as he looked back made my skin flush and my breath catch. For the first time I saw him without anger in his eyes, and he was even more attractive than he'd been yesterday. That took some doing.
"That was amazing," I said eventually, almost sorry to break the silence. But if I didn't say something I was afraid I might do something, and that couldn't lead anywhere good.
Yes it could, my treacherous brain insisted. It could lead to his hands on my—
Shut up! Flustered, I realized I'd missed Kadran's answer. His lips twitched into a little smile and I knew he'd spotted my distraction. My eyes narrowed expecting him to make fun of me, but the laughter didn't follow the smile.
"I trained at the Ikarna Temple," he said, sinking to sit across from me on the floor. If the cold hard surface bothered him he didn't show it at all. "The forms calm me, let me channel my anger. It feels good to be able to do the exercises — there was never a chance on the Red King's Revenge."
"Why?" I asked, pulling the water flask from my pack and taking a swig. "I'd have thought those bastards would have liked you being able to fight."
"No student of the temple would ever serve on a slave ship," he said, a dark look on his face. "We stand against slavery in all its forms. I doubt anyone aboard would have recognized the style, but it wasn't worth the risk. And it gives me a surprise to throw at them if I do meet them again."
His hands tightened into fists for a moment and I shivered. I didn't envy the slavers if he did run into them, but I couldn't think of a more deserving bunch of bastards. A smile spread across my face at the thought.
Kadran raised an eyebrow and looked me up and down. I shivered at the close examination, but didn't flinch from it.
"You never learned to fight, did you?" he asked. I shook my head and he nodded decisively. "Very well. I'll show you some of the basics."
"Hang on, I can't learn... that," I protested.
"Obviously," he answered, jumping up and holding out his hand. "It takes years of dedication to learn the Ikarna war dance, after all. But you need to be able to defend yourself, just in case. A few simple moves, we can manage that."
Reluctantly, I took his hand and let him help me up. Despite the padding of my sleeping bag, the hard decking of the shrine left me feeling stiff and sore. Maybe a little exercise was just what I needed and in any case, it gave me an excuse to be close to Kadran. That was its own reward.
The heat of his body washed over me and I realized I was biting my lip. Kadran's smile broadened as he looked down at me and it was only then that I remembered that I'd taken off my jeans before going to sleep.
Yep, he was looking at my bare legs. And it looked like he enjoyed the view. I tried to pull away, but Kadran didn't let go of my hand.
"We must warm up," he told me.
"Once I've put on my jeans," I said, trying to hide how flustered I was feeling. I doubted I managed it, given how hot my face was, and Kadran chuckled.
"No, Amy. Better like this," he said. "Those 'jeans' aren't designed for this kind of movement, and they'd get in your way."
His tone brooked no argument, and he pulled me out into the open space away from our little camp. After a second of struggling I gave up. There was no resisting his strength, and besides, he was right about the jeans. They were fine for hiking in, but stretches? I doubted it.
And it's not like I don't enjoy him looking at me, I admitted silently. Wasn't it fair? I'd been staring at him already, after all.
The basic exercises
were easy enough, stretching the kinks out of my muscles. We grinned at each other as we worked, each glad of the excuse to look at the other. But Kadran was demanding, and I wasn't in the best of shape, and by the time he was satisfied I'd warmed up I felt a little out of breath already.
"All right," he said, moving over to stand beside me. "We'll start with a simple punch. When you hit me, you were just striking with your arm."
"That's what a punch is," I protested.
"No," he said, very serious. "A good punch uses your whole body. Here, plant your feet like this..."
His hands guided me into position and the heat of his touch on my bare legs made me shiver. But now that he was teaching me, Kadran's focus was absolute. If my skin distracted him, he hid it well, his hands firmly but gently adjusting my stance until I was close enough.
It was maddening. We were so close, and my body ached for him, and he wasn't going to do anything about it. It was enough to make me want to hit someone.
I guess that works as motivation, I thought as he showed me how to strike. Twist the hips, punch at the same time, all my muscles working in one direction.
"That does feel better," I admitted as I tried it again, my fist whooshing through the air.
"Better, but not good enough," he growled. Stepping close behind me, he reached around to take my wrist in one hand. I could feel him, his body almost touching mine, his firm grip on my wrist positioning me to his satisfaction. Part of me wanted to turn and throw myself at him. Being this close to him and not doing anything about it was torture.
For both of us, I was pretty sure. I felt the heat radiating from him, the strained edges of his self-control. But Kadran's didn't let that distract him as he guided my hand through the punch again. And again, tiny changes to my stance each time, until at last he was satisfied.
"Try it now," he said, stepping back. Lowering my fist to my hip I took in a breath, and as I let it out I snapped the punch forward. Everything fell into one smooth movement, my hips putting power behind the punch. It felt perfect.
Stolen by the Alien Raider: A Novel of the Silent Empire Page 7
