Lizzy closed her eyes and felt the stillness of the room, and in the quiet, she could feel his love filling every part of her being. And then she knew—beyond a doubt she knew—that she would stand by this man no matter what.
“There is no window in this room, Mr. Darcy, but here is the candle.” She picked it up, and it illuminated them. With a shaking hand, he took the candle from her and placed it on the table, and he brought her to him. But as he felt her body against his, his passion overtook everything, and he picked her up and took her to the sofa and lay on top of her. As he moved against her, his warm lips kissed her mouth and neck, and then his fingers reached for the buttons on her dress. While he was attempting to open the tiny pearl buttons, she pushed him as hard as she could, and he fell off her and onto the floor. Although she was nearly panting from passion and exertion, she managed to sputter, “Mr. Darcy, you must not. I am a maiden.”
“I know. But I don’t mind.” He tried to get back on the sofa, but she stopped him with her foot.
“No, it is not all right. It is my intention to leave this room in the same way I came in. And what do you mean you don’t mind? You would never marry someone who is not a maiden.”
“I would if the former maiden was you, and I was the reason you weren’t.” There was that half smile that had so charmed her—the reason she had forgiven his objectionable behavior at Hunsford and why she had allowed him to come to Longbourn time after time even though he would depart without making her an offer of marriage.
“You see, it does not matter,” he said, and the fire in his eyes returned. “There are few advantages to my situation, but one of them is that I am the freest of creatures when I transform, and because of that, I see how stupid society is with its suffocating rules. In my world, I am bound only by my loyalty to my pack, that is, my family. All of this nitpicking nonsense invented by people who need something to fill their idle hours does not matter.
“In the wild you deal with the reality of the moment. There are no such things as artifice and lies, and so I speak what I feel. Right now, I want to tell you how much I love you and need you and want to make love to you. I want to taste and touch every inch of your body and…”
“Mr. Darcy, please,” Lizzy said covering her ears, but placing her hand over her ears did not stop what was happening to her physically.
“Mr. Darcy!” he cried. “Mr. Darcy! There is another damnable convention—no first names are permitted,” he said in extreme frustration. “Call me Fitzwilliam or William or Will, I answer to all three, but do not call me Mr. Darcy, especially when we are alone together as we are now.”
“Very well. Fitzwilliam, William, and Will, I am going to bed.”
When she started walking toward the door, he called after her, “Would you like to see my scar?”
That statement caused her to stop, and she turned to look at him. “Your scar? Do you mean from when you were bitten? But you said the bite was on your, um, your rump.”
“Yes, it is. Do you want to see it?” And there was that devilish grin again.
Lizzy’s mouth dropped open. “Certainly not.”
“You are not curious?” Lizzy shook her head vigorously. “Elizabeth, before you say anything else, there is something you should know. Because I am part wolf, all of my senses are heightened, and I can tell what you are feeling and where you are feeling it.”
“Oh, my God!”
“Exactly. I know that you want me as much as I want you.” He started to close the distance between them.
“Yes, I would like to see your scar,” she quickly said in order to stop his advance, and when he started to open his breeches, she closed her eyes.
“You may look now. You see, it looks fresh, but if you touch it, it is smooth.”
Lizzy looked at his muscled buttocks, and she felt a jolt go through her, and after looking at his smirk, she knew that he was aware of her physical response, and she tried to focus on his scar.
“There is not much to see, is there?” she said, trying to modulate her voice. The scar was bright red, and barely a half inch in length, and without thinking how inappropriate her action was, she placed her finger on it and found that it was as smooth as he had said it would be. “I do not understand. It has healed, but it looks as if it just happened.”
“I know. It is a curious thing.” After pulling up his breeches, he said, “Now where were we?”
“I was making good my escape,” she said as she moved closer to the door. “You may not care if I remain a maiden, but I most certainly do.” Lizzy scooted past him, opened the door, and practically ran across the foyer. She was halfway up the stairs, when he called after her.
“Lizzy, I have not yet proposed.”
“Oh, my love,” she sighed, “that is the first time you have called me Lizzy.” She started to go downstairs, but then stopped because she knew what would happen.
“Will you not come back so that I may ask you properly?”
“No, I shall not. Ask me after breakfast when you have shoes on and your breeches buttoned.” She blew him a kiss before running up the stairs, and Darcy fought the urge to go outside and let out one of his loudest and longest howls.
Chapter 10
Mr. Darcy opened his pocket watch for the fifth time and held it out so that Anne and Georgiana could see that it was now eleven fifteen. The morning was nearly gone, but Elizabeth had yet to put in an appearance.
“She has changed her mind and is holed up in her room or is making good her escape. She said as much last night,” Darcy said, addressing his cousin and sister, who were sitting across from him at the breakfast room table.
“William, that does not make any sense,” Anne insisted. “If Elizabeth had changed her mind, she would have asked Jackson to see to the necessary arrangements so that she might return to Longbourn. She most certainly would not ‘hole up’ in her room like some frightened sparrow or ‘make good her escape’ by climbing down a trellis.”
Darcy was not reassured. He had assumed that Elizabeth would be as excited as he was after their passionate time together in his study and would come downstairs as early as possible. That is exactly what he had done. Looking in the mirror, he saw that he looked like a perfect peacock. He could have attended a ball without changing his clothes.
“From what you told us this morning, I do not understand why you would think that you have not secured Elizabeth’s affections. What was the last thing she said before you parted?” Anne asked, pressing her cousin.
Darcy smiled at the memory of Elizabeth standing on the staircase with her long curls flowing over her shoulders and the top two buttons on her dress undone. “She called me ‘my love.’”
“Is that not proof enough of her affection?”
“It is just that I have waited so long to find a mate. I don’t want anything to go wrong.”
“I would suggest that you not use the word ‘mate.’ I made the mistake of using that term, and when I did, she blanched,” Anne counseled.
It was another ten minutes before he once again produced the pocket watch. “The time is now 11:25. She has changed her mind,” Darcy said and started to pace.
“Will, she may have overslept,” his sister said. “She was greatly affected by your revelation, and when you consider that she spent part of last night out on the terrace and then waited for your return at dawn, it is perfectly logical to assume that she was exhausted and needed her sleep.”
Georgiana had guessed correctly. When Lizzy had returned to her room, her spirits were soaring, and she was too excited to sleep. She went to the settee and replayed the events of the night in her mind, beginning with Mr. Darcy finding her on the terrace and standing watch over her, followed by that awful moment in the study when he had found her waiting for him, and she had been truly frightened. But he had quickly recovered from his surprise and had put her at ease by telling her
how much he loved her. And when he had kissed her, she experienced a sensation that was so new to her. It made her want to slip her hands under his open shirt and run her fingers over his muscled chest. The same warmth that she had felt then returned now, and her eyes popped open thinking that if Mr. Darcy was nearby he would know that she was thinking of him and his member, which, when pressed against her, was as hard as her father’s walnut walking stick.
There were no words to explain what she felt when he had lain on top of her fully aroused. At least, she hoped he was fully aroused. When he had first reached for the buttons on her dress, she had allowed him to open the first two before regaining her senses. If she hadn’t stopped him at that moment, she would have been down to her chemise in no time at all, and with thoughts of Mr. Darcy helping her out of her undergarments, she drifted off to sleep. Flooded by warm memories and new sensations, she remained in a deep sleep and did not hear Ellie when she came into the bed chamber at 9:30, 10:15, and again at 10:45.
“Elizabeth was exhausted and needed her sleep?” Darcy said to his sister and cousin. “Well, excuse me. Even though I have barely closed my eyes for the past two days, I did not go to bed. It shows a lack of interest on her part.” Once again he pointed to the ever-present pocket watch. “It is now 11:35. Jackson,” he called to his butler, “breakfast is over. You may clear everything away and await my instructions. At present, we do not know if our guest will remain closeted in her room and will choose only to join us for supper.”
Georgiana looked sympathetically at the butler. Jackson would understand that Mr. Darcy was in a fit of pique, but that it would pass. The butler had known the master of Pemberley for most of his life and had witnessed many such scenes as the gentleman he served suffered from a lack of patience.
Darcy was pacing in front of the window when Lizzy burst into the room. “My most sincere apologies, Miss Darcy, Miss de Bourgh, Mr. Darcy. I overslept. Ellie, fearing I was unwell, finally gave me a shake to see if I was still of this earth.” After spreading her hands wide and turning around, she said, smiling, “As you can see, I am.” Rather than look at Mr. Darcy, who was clearly out of sorts, she turned her gaze upon Anne and Georgiana. “How is everyone this morning?”
“Splendid,” Georgiana said. “It is truly a beautiful day.” When her brother glanced out at the chilly gray day and made a face, she refused to follow his gaze. Instead, she glared at him. “Beauty is often a matter of opinion, and to me, it is a beautiful day.”
Anne interjected herself between the two staring siblings. “It is true that it is not the prettiest of days, but it will do for a walk. Georgiana, will you accompany me?”
“No, she will not,” Darcy said in a firm voice. “Anne, you are not going outside. You will catch a chill, and then your mother will have been right about how ill advised it was for you to come to Pemberley in the autumn.”
“So that is your concern? Not my health, but my mother and her opinions and which of you was right? Very well, we shall remain indoors and go to the conservatory.”
“You know exactly what I meant,” he called after his cousin as Georgiana and she walked arm-in-arm out of the room.
Once he turned his attention to Lizzy, she asked if she should return when he was in better humor. “I see that someone got up on the wrong side of the bed this morning.”
“I did not get up on any side of the bed. I never went to bed.” Softening his tone, he asked, “Did you really oversleep?”
“Yes. I fell asleep on the settee and slept for three solid hours, which is the most I have slept since you shared your news with me. It was eleven o’clock when Ellie woke me, and I have been running around like a chicken without its head so that I might complete my toilette and get down here as quickly as possible. And how am I greeted? With a sour look and a sharp tongue. But I must say that you look very handsome. Are you going somewhere?”
Darcy went over and took Lizzy in his arms. “You are a saucy, impertinent girl. Even so, I love you. I was afraid that you had changed your mind.”
“If I were to change my mind, it would not be for the reason you think.”
“And what reason would that be?” he said with a hint of concern creeping into his voice.
“You are very bossy. You order people around with your harsh tone of voice or by pushing them about with your muzzle. You may be the master of Pemberley, but you will not be the master of me. I must be free to speak my mind.”
“When have you not spoken your mind?” Darcy stepped away from her, and with his hands behind his back, he recited word for word a part of Elizabeth’s refusal of his offer of marriage. “‘You are mistaken if you suppose that the mode of your declaration affected me in any other way than sparing me the concern I might have felt in refusing you if you had behaved in a more gentlemanlike manner.’ Need I say more?”
“No, please don’t. You should not repeat what I said. A memory at such a time as this is unpardonable.”
“And what time would that be, Elizabeth? Are you saying that you will accept my offer of marriage?”
“Not yet. There are things I would like to discuss.”
“Then let us go into my study.”
Lizzy laughed. “Absolutely not. I will not risk a repeat of last night. I suggest the first drawing room.”
“The first drawing room? The one next to the foyer where all of the servants go back and forth? If we are to have no privacy, why don’t we just sit on the stairs in the foyer and have everyone listen in on our conversation?”
“I think mine is the better suggestion, but whichever you prefer is fine with me, dear,” she answered while trying to suppress a smile.
Darcy gestured for her to go ahead of him into the first drawing room, and so she would have her way once again, he thought. Shaking his head, he reminded himself that he had wanted to marry a lady with spirit. Well, he was about to get his wish—in spades.
Chapter 11
Darcy directed Lizzy to a corner of the drawing room that was not directly in view of the foyer, but rather than sitting on the sofa, Lizzy chose one of a pair of chairs nearest to the fire. Although Darcy had surrounded himself with the most loyal of servants, there was no doubt that the lives of their master and mistress were of keen interest to those who lived belowstairs, and Lizzy’s presence had prompted much speculation as to whether the master would finally take a wife, creating a palpable buzz in the house.
After moving his chair closer to hers, Darcy began by apologizing for his aggressive behavior the previous night. “It may be helpful if you understand what happens during my transformation back to human form. As soon as the sun appears over the horizon, the changes begin. The physical process lasts for about twenty minutes. However, it takes longer for the mind to adjust to the altered state. Because of this, I remain in my study until I am sure that I am thinking as a person and not as an animal. But last night, as soon as I entered the room, I knew that someone was there, and my lupine instincts took over. I am truly sorry that I frightened you.”
“I do understand,” Lizzy quickly responded. “I should have waited for you to come to me in the morning. That was really my fault, not yours.”
“Thank you for that,” he said and reached across the divide and took hold of her hand. He wanted to kiss it, but that would have meant bending over so that his head was almost at her knees. “Damn it! This is ridiculous,” he said standing up.
“Why don’t we go to the second drawing room, where we will have more privacy?” Lizzy offered.
“Thank you,” he said with a sigh of relief, and the couple quickly made their way to the yellow drawing room. But they were not alone. David and Goliath had been with their master all morning, ready to spring into action if necessary. Lizzy was of the opinion that the whippets did not approve of her and that would explain why they seemed always to walk between Mr. Darcy and her. After signaling to his dogs that they were to
stay put, he looked at Lizzy. “Now, where was I?”
“You were speaking of your transformation.”
“Ah, yes. Well, the same thing happens when I go from human to wolf form. It is in that first hour that I must be careful, as my mind has not fully gone over to being a wolf. Lest I confuse you, you should know that there is a part of me that always remains human, which is why I understood what you were saying on the terrace, and there is a part of me that always remains a wolf, which is why I knew that…”
“Yes, I understand,” Lizzy quickly interjected. “You were speaking of your transformation.”
Darcy smiled, remembering Lizzy’s embarrassment when she learned that he knew how she was reacting to him physically. He would never have kissed her in such a way if she had not signaled her interest with her scent.
“I realize that I quite overpowered you last night when I carried you to the sofa and…”
“William, I completely comprehend what happened last night. There is no reason to go into detail. All is forgiven.” She looked away from him because the mysterious stirring had returned, and there was no way he would not know what was happening to her.
“Again, I thank you for your understanding,” he said with a smile in his voice. “Now, you said that you had some questions for me.” With that, his back stiffened. He could just imagine what she must be thinking and what questions she would ask. Would she be disgusted by the idea of his hunting down an animal and eating it raw? Would their children be werewolves? Why did wolves howl? But the question he feared the most was that she would want a detailed description of his transformation. She would be repulsed by a vision of a man dropping to his knees as his arms became legs, followed quickly by the thickening of his neck, an emerging muzzle, and the change in his teeth that were designed to tear an animal apart. The metamorphosis was completed when his hair became fur. She would want to know all of that, and his stomach churned at the idea of speaking of such things to the woman he loved.
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