My eyes snapped open and the fantasy was gone. “I failed him.”
“Who?” Cameron asked. I’d almost forgotten he was there.
“Knight. I never…” I turned away from the window. “I never looked for him. I never checked to see if he was really dead. At the time, just the thought of him gone was too painful. But now…”
“You need to know,” Cameron finished. I nodded. “What if he’s alive? As improbable as it might be.”
My hand went to my stomach. I could never face him again. I couldn’t bear to think of him seeing me pregnant or holding my child. “He’s not. And he wouldn’t want me now if he was. An unfaithful woman.”
Cameron shrugged. “You don’t know that.”
“He’s dead,” I affirmed. “But I still need to know.”
That moment, with my hand on my stomach, was when I first felt my baby move. A little sensation, like a goldfish was in my belly moving around. I gasped, and joy exploded inside me.
“She moved,” I exclaimed, a spark of happiness blooming from within. “Feel, feel.” Cameron put his hand on my stomach and we felt my baby’s little feet kick against our palms.
Everything would be okay. It wouldn’t be, I knew it. I had no illusions. But I tried to believe it, if only for that little baby inside me.
I had no idea that what we’d done to Randall would end up spiraling out of control.
CHAPTER 15
THE CASTLE HAD A BLANKET of quiet the next few days. It wasn’t a calm quiet, or a lull in life where we had nothing to talk about. It was a silence full of unspoken emotion.
I joined Olivier, Renard, and Cameron on the back patio for lunch. Our table was overcast by the shadow of the castle to protect the turned, but it still had a large umbrella over it just in case. I sat down with my tray and unrolled my silverware. I could see each of them had a million things rolling around in their heads but weren’t ready to talk about any of it.
From the look on Renard’s face, though, I knew what he was thinking. Arabella had been so young and pure, and now she was gone. He’d been very close to her, keeping in touch and visiting ever since she was born. Every time he had gotten a new photo of her, he made everyone look at it at least once. She had been a beauty, with brains and a gentleness about her I rarely saw in others. Olivier knew what the money from a companion contract would do for her future, so Renard convinced Arabella to come here.
We failed her. We didn’t protect her like we promised we would. That was me, the vampire who never kept a promise. Not a promise to protect someone, or a promise to be true to the man I loved for the rest of my days. I sighed heavily as I mentally hated myself for a few moments. Yes, I was going to milk my sadness for as long as I wanted to. Being immortal, I had that right. Cameron nudged me with his elbow and broke the silence.
“Hey,” he said, his mouth full of noodles. He slurped them up and chewed quickly. “Did you reach out to the packs yet?”
My stomach plummeted and I felt the baby kick in response. “Umm, no not really.”
Cameron gave me a disapproving look. “You chickened out, didn’t you.”
I stuck my tongue out at him in protest. “I did not. I haven’t made my plan yet. I need to be careful. You know how the packs are about us in their territory.”
“Wouldn’t want one of them to get in trouble for sparing you, now would we?” Arthur said ironically, approaching the table. I raised an eyebrow at him that warned I might hit him if he kept talking. “If you need to go to the pack territory, I can take you. Hunters are allowed in certain circumstances, which is a good thing since you don’t have that bracelet full of vampire teeth to protect you.”
“You knew about that?” But I’d been so careful!
He rolled his eyes. “Please. I could smell it on you.” Let’s hope that’s all he smelled on me.
We left the castle together, on foot, to the Mohawk reservation. It was about ten miles away, which for humans would take several hours to trek on foot. For us, a quick sprint would reduce the time to about ten minutes.
With Arthur beside me, we took off at full speed. Another vampire nearby changed the dynamic of running. The forest unfolded in front of us, every creature, rock, and tree perfectly laid out in our minds. I sensed his power and speed next to me, and knew exactly how hunting with him would be, though we’d never done so together. It was the smallest of telepathic connections we didn’t have to drink to obtain. A natural link between hunters for them to effectively take down prey, the way we used to do it when hunting humans was part of surviving.
Past hunts played in my head, from the times I ran with Olivier and her friends. I won’t lie. I missed the thrill of hunting. It wasn’t killing them, or even drinking from them that was fun, because both of those things were abhorrent to me now. It was chasing them as a group. Connecting with other vampires telepathically, knowing exactly how you needed to move or compensate for the rest of them. You moved as one, together, until you had your prey cornered, and everyone could feed.
I slowed down as the prey in my memory morphed into Arabella’s lifeless face. Arthur immediately slowed as well and stood beside me. The telepathic link faded.
“Is the baby alright?” he asked in a worried tone.
“She’s fine,” I assured him. And then something occurred to me. “Why did you go after me alone when you caught me? You had a group of Hunters with you, but you went alone. Why didn’t you hunt together?”
Arthur worked his jaw and looked away before answering, like he almost felt guilty, but not really. “It was so the werewolf wouldn’t run away. I was tracking both of you. If I went in with a group, taking you down would’ve been loud enough for him to hear, and vice versa. One of you would’ve escaped. And I needed both of you alive.”
“Both of us? Me for my trial, I know.”
“And him for his.”
Right. Being taken back to the Lycan packs and tried for no other reason than simply existing.
“No offense, Arthur, but every time you talk, I grow to like you even less,” I informed him.
He tilted his head towards me in acknowledgement. “Noted.” He didn’t look upset by the notion. “We should keep going. We’re almost to the territory line.”
“Ah, so that’s why I smelled dog pee,” I complained, wrinkling my nose.
We walked further, passing the fence of the reservation, and were greeted by a stronger scent of urine. I had to put my hand over my mouth to block the stench.
“Is this their porta potty or something?” Breathing through my mouth only made it worse, and I tried not to gag, or throw up.
“They’re marking their turf. They want to make sure it will scare off other Lycans,” Arthur said calmly, unaffected by the odor. Or just pretending nothing ever bothered him, as usual.
“I know, but this is just overkill. Geez.” I walked faster, trying to get away from the fence and back to fresh air.
Arthur gave me that look, like I was that special kind of person who looks for their phone while holding it in their hand. I pranced past him, and straight into a Lycan’s claws. The pack had snuck up on us, using the overwhelming scent of wolf pee to mask their approach.
The Lycan in front of me wrapped a long-fingered hand around my throat before wrenching me to the side and bringing me against his chest. I could feel his heart pounding on my back, and his acrid scent turned my stomach. I hoped my pregnancy wouldn’t make me barf on him. Blowing chunks on a Lycan would probably earn me death.
“Let her go,” Arthur demanded, but he was in no position to make demands, as we were surrounded by a very large pack. By the looks of their faces, vampires as a whole hadn’t made a good impression on them. “We’re not here to hurt you. We just need to see your Alpha.” Arthur carefully reached to pull his shirt collar back. Beneath it, right on the chest muscle over his heart, was a tattoo of a sword rune. The symbol of the vampire Hunters.
The Lycans weren’t impressed.
They grabbed Arthu
r and dragged us away.
CHAPTER 16
BEING MANHANDLED BY A PACK of Lycans wasn’t exactly on my bucket list. Especially while six months pregnant. The one holding me loosened his grip on my neck when he noticed my belly, but he continued pulling me along with him.
At the center of the reservation village was a large open area where the rest of the pack stood. They were talking amongst themselves, but turned when we were brought before them. Arthur was thrown onto the ground and held with his face to the dirt. My captor pushed me down to my knees and pulled my arm at an angle that hurt.
“Oww!” I complained, trying to get free. The Lycan backhanded me on the face. This trip was going so well.
The group of humans and Lycans parted, and their Alpha stepped towards us. I caught his scent and recognized it. This was the pack of the pup I’d spared, and this was his Alpha. The Alpha that gave me his bracelet full of vampire teeth from his various kills, the bracelet that had kept me alive.
“So,” the Alpha said, his voice full of authority. “Two vampires caught on my territory. Are you here because you wish to die? It is my right to kill you.” Arthur struggled against the Lycans holding him down, but they had a firm hold on him.
“It is also our right to kill Lycans in our borders,” I stated, hoping the Alpha would remember me and what I’d done for his pack. The Alpha stepped forward and grabbed me, pulling me up until I was standing. He looked at my face and I could tell he hadn’t noticed who I was until that moment.
“You,” he said in revelation. What passed on his face wasn’t anger, or dismissal. It was respect. “Let them go,” he ordered. His pack looked confused, but they obeyed. Arthur wiped dirt from his face when he got up. He looked pissed.
“I’m a Hunter.” Arthur showed his tattoo off again in an offended huff. “Your pack should’ve granted us safe passage.”
The Alpha shrugged. “You’re not broken.” He turned back to me and lifted my arms to inspect my wrists. “You are not wearing my bracelet.”
“I lost it,” I said regretfully. “I’m sorry.”
“No need to be sorry.” He let me go. “I hope it protected you.” I nodded. His gift had done much more than that. He flicked his wrist at the pack and they moved away. “We will talk.”
The Alpha, whose name was Alexander, as I came to find, led us into his home. It was a simple rustic structure that looked like he’d built it himself from nearby trees. I appreciated the unpolished style of the handmade wooden table and chairs he motioned for us to sit at. They were comfortable. I considered asking him to make me some for my new rooms, but that would probably never happen.
“So,” he said once we’d both sat down. “What brings you to pack territory?” He offered us each a bottle of water before joining us at the head of the table. Arthur took a long swig of his water, so Alexander turned his focus to me.
Now that I was here, I found it hard to form my words into a proper sentence. How would I put it? Well, I’m here to find out if my werewolf boyfriend is dead or not so I can stop feeling guilty that I cheated on him. Too much?
“I’m trying to find out some information on the whereabouts of a friend of mine.” There, that was neutral enough.
Alexander raised his eyebrows. “You risked your life to ask me where your vampire friend is? Don’t you keep track of your own kind.”
“He’s not a vampire,” Arthur chimed in. He sounded insulted, like of course we’d never consult Lycans about anything that wasn’t Lycan related. And maybe then, even not.
“Your friend is a Lycan,” Alexander surmised.
“A werewolf,” I clarified.
That made his eyebrows go even higher. “One of the Marked. I heard they found one but I didn’t believe it. And you know him? He is your friend?”
“Friend is a relative term,” Arthur said sarcastically.
I turned to glare at him. “I didn’t bring you here for commentary, Arthur. Shut up and drink your water.” Arthur grunted and I rolled my eyes in exasperation, glancing back at Alexander. A light of understanding had passed over his face.
“The werewolf is your mate,” he said. There wasn’t judgement in his voice, surprisingly, but I caught him glancing at my belly. “His?”
“No,” I affirmed. It was silly to even ask. Even if he and I had gone that far, I’d never heard of a Lycan/vampire child. Werepire. That sounded good. No. I’d never heard of a werepire. What would my child with Balthazar be? Vamcubus. Incupire? Neither option sounded trendy.
Alexander sighed and folded his hands on the table in front of him. “I can find out his status for you.” He hesitated, absently picking at a knot in the table. “They will not allow him to live,” he added gently, repeating almost verbatim what everyone else had said to me. I was grateful he was trying to spare my feelings, but I was beyond that now. He glanced up at me to see if I was upset, and I stared back unblinking.
“I’m aware.” He relaxed with the knowledge I wasn’t about to get weepy on him. “I still need to know.”
He nodded and stood up. “Very well. I will do this for you. But I am afraid this is the only boon I can give you. As much as I want to protect you because of what you did for Simon, you have lost my bracelet, and without it my pack will not be compliant about sparing you.”
Yeah, rub it in that I lost the one thing that would ensure I can enter pack territory safely to find out about Knight myself.
“I understand, and I appreciate you helping me even though I don’t have it anymore,” I told him sincerely.
He pushed his chair in and motioned for us to follow him out the back door. His backyard was open to the forest, and on the edge of it was a group of children playing. I instantly recognized Simon to be among them. He looked happy, kicking an old soccer ball around with his friends. He was taller now, and his hair had an extra year of growth on it. He was starting to look like a shaggy pre-teen.
“You risked death to save him,” Alexander said thoughtfully. “Even if we cannot continue to protect you, we can never repay what you did for us.”
“And that’s why you’re helping me, isn’t it? To repay me?” I didn’t want to ask a favor of him if it was because of that. He might put himself at unnecessary risk out of duty.
He shook his head. “No. Information is not the same as sparing a life. One day, I hope we can make it even. And that day may come sooner than we think.”
Arthur stopped staring at a crack in the window and looked up sharply. “What does that mean?”
Alexander looked like it was obvious, whatever he knew, and shocked that we were unaware of it. “There are whispers among the packs. Some of the wolves overseas have seen the vampires there acting strangely.” So they had a party line about our business but not about Knight. Maybe he was kept a dirty little secret.
“Strange how?” I asked Alexander.
He shrugged. “I don’t know much more than that. But if even Lycans notice something…”
“Then there’s something wrong,” Arthur finished. “Thank you, Alexander.” He looked at me. “We have to go.”
I turned back to Alexander, who nodded and said, “I’ll send a messenger when we know something about your mate. A human messenger,” he added. Yes. Wouldn’t want a repeat of last time.
CHAPTER 17
ARTHUR WENT STRAIGHT TO OTHELLO’S office after he escorted me home. I was mentally exhausted and went to my rooms to rest. What I really wanted was extra blood. In rare moments, like this one, I was angry at the restrictions on my blood intake. One extra mouthful wouldn’t hurt me. I felt like an addict. I missed being able to drink whenever I wanted. I had total freedom outside of the Order, and now I was back to rules and standards and ugh.
Then I remembered Knight’s face when I almost drained him, that moment forever burned into my perfect memory. His skin had gone pale, and his eyes almost lost their glow. I’d never been so scared in all four hundred plus years of my life. And even being so close to death, he still chose to com
fort me when I started crying like a baby.
Benjamin broke through my memories when he came in through the front door of my suite, carrying a half-eaten loaf of French bread. He took several nibbles of it before he noticed me sitting in my new rocking chair by the bird cage.
“Are you alright?” he asked me. I was used to him being kind to me, more so than Alfred, but his expression made me realize I had tears on my face. I sniffed, stood up, and wiped my face with my hands.
“Yes. I’m fine,” I told him. I placed a hand on my belly, feeling a kick from my baby. She didn’t like it when I was sad.
Benjamin was about to shut his bedroom door when he remembered something. “Oh, I almost forgot. They need you in Othello’s office.” He closed his door and that was that.
Marie gave me the death glare when I walked past her to Othello’s office. I considered flipping her off, but being petty wasn’t my style, so I ignored her and went straight through the enormous double doors. I expected to see Othello and Arthur in a deep discussion, but instead, there was a group of about ten vampires, all of them the oldest in the Order, Olivier included. The decision makers.
Othello looked up from his seat at his desk and stood up when he saw me. “Good. You’re here. Arthur insisted you rest before coming in.” God, this Hunter was babying me. It was the opposite of cute.
“I don’t recall hiring him to be my nanny,” I said tartly. I didn’t care about his feelings. Not that he had any.
“Not important,” Olivier said before Othello or Arthur could respond. “Clue her in.”
Othello made his way to in front of his giant desk. “We looked into what the Lycan told you and Arthur.”
“And?” I asked.
“Apparently, the other Orders have been having issues with the turned. They chose to not say anything, since each one thought it was only in their ranks, and it prevented us from knowing about it.”
That was troubling, but it could easily be contained.
“They were told about the execution here, correct?” I asked him. That would cause unrest. It should also spark fear in them.
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