by Mz. Lady P
“Thank you DeeDee!” She beamed spinning in the mirror.
Looking at my little sister my heart began to fill with so much love. That little girl made me feel a whole new type of love. I imagined if this was the type of love that mothers are suppose to feel towards their children. If so, I couldn’t understand why our mother didn’t feel that way towards us. Like the old lady that lived across the street would say, ‘there’s no use in crying over spilled milk’ so I made a vow to show and give my little sister all my love. We were all we needed.
The horn of her school bus started to violently beep, which let me know that her impatient driver was outside. I grabbed her lunch box, clipped it to the back of her book bag and placed it on her back. Giving her a hug and kissed I watched her get on the bus and continued to watch until the bus disappeared down the block.
I walked back into the house and went to clean up the kitchen. I was hoping to hurry up and get out of the house before I had another run in with my mother. After whipping down the counters with bleach I went to my bathroom to go take a shower.
Standing under the running warm water I began to feel on my curves. I was only fifteen but I had the body of a goddess. I studied the bodies of the woman on the music videos and I could have been mistaken for one of them. I really didn’t like the attention that my fat ass, thick thighs, and double D breast got me so I hid my body under baggy clothes.
I used the Olay cleansing brush to wash my face. I took pride in my beautiful smooth dark skin and I did everything in my power to keep it radiant. After moisturizing my face, I rinsed off and got out of the shower.
The iPhone default ringtone blared through my room letting me know that someone was trying to get in contact with me.
“Hello!” I yelled into the phone that I had on speaker.
“Yo Diamond where you at?” Bobby’s voice echoed through my room.
“I’m home give me a few minutes to get dressed I’ll be out.”
“Hurry up D, time is money baby!”
“I’m coming.” I said before ending the call.
Bobby was the only block nigga that took me seriously. When I finally realized that my mother really wasn’t going to take care of us I had to find a way to make money. That bullshit job I had at McDonald’s wasn’t giving me enough hours so my checks couldn’t support us. I only had two options; sell ass or hustle. I wasn’t the type to fuck for money so I decided to bleed the block.
No one would take me seriously because I was a female but that didn’t stop me. Everyday I would stand on the corner with the corner boys and I would learn. I studied them closely finding flaws in the way they conducted things. Bobby saw the determination in me so he decided to put me on. Every since then I been making mad money. Majority of my money went in the safe that I had built underneath a floorboard in my closet.
I was saving up for my eighteenth birthday. The day I turned eighteen Kay and I was out of here. I planned on copping me a nice little spot near downtown Fort Lauderdale and finally getting out of this hellhole. Three more years of hustling then I would be out the game. This was only temporary for me, this wasn’t a lifestyle I planned on living for long.
Dressed in an oversized pair of blue and white Fort Lauderdale’s High School sweat suit, I laced up my blue and white Jordan. I used the brush to pull my hair back into a long ponytail. I wasn’t really a girly girl, but I did make it my business to go to the Dominicans every two weeks to have my hair treated. I wasn’t trying to walk around with sprayed on edges like half the bitches that was in the hood.
Grabbing Kay’s iPad, and all of our other valuable things I locked them up in the safe. I didn’t want to risk my father stealing and pawning any of our shit. After making sure that the room was cleaned and our things were locked up I grabbed my black Jansport book bag, slung it on my back. Locking my room door I walked across the street where Bobby was waiting for me.
“For once I’d like to see you dressed like a girl.” Bobby said as soon as I took a seat in his all black Chevy Impala.
“Don’t hold your breath nigga.”
“You a butch or some shit?”
“Why the fuck would you ask me that?”
“I never see you with no nigga, plus look how your ass dress.” He said passing me a bag of weed and a grape Swisher Sweet.
“I ain’t focused on no nigga right now, I’m just trying to get this money.”
“I feel. Aye but check me out roll that shit.” He nodded towards the weed.
I rolled the blunts with Bobby words dancing in my head. It’s not that I wasn’t interested in men; the one that I was in love with didn’t feel the same way about me. I was madly in love with Bobby but I knew there was no chance that we could be together. I wasn’t the type of girl he went for plus he made it clear that I was his right hand. I was already in the homie category and there was no recovering from that.
I sealed the blunt, stealing glances at his sexy face. Bobby was personally made by God, that’s how handsome he was. His deep dark chocolate skin was as smooth as silk. He had some dreamy hazel eyes, and deep dimples that I desperately wanted to stick my tongue in. His body was rip and cut in all the right places. He turned the steering wheel to the right causing his muscles to flex and my panties to get wet. Although I haven’t been sexually active I was aware of my body. I spent countless of hours in the bathroom exploring myself while watching porn.
“Pass that shit.” Bobby said stirring me away from my thoughts. I was so deep in my thoughts that I didn’t realize that the blunt was halfway gone.
“What’s so heavy on your mind?” Bobby asked choking on that Stanky.
Stankey was some new weed that hit the streets from Haiti. It burned real smooth and had a strong odor to it. We copped from some Haitian boys on 13th street. They were the only ones that had this good weed. Countless of times I tried to convince Bobby into doing business with them, but he always decline. Bobby’s uncle, our connect held him by the balls so even if he wanted to make a move like that wouldn’t be able to.
“Nothing why you asked?”
“You damn near smoked the whole joint!”
“My bad boy, that’s some good shit though.” I said trying to change the subject.
“I know it.” he replied pulling up to the trap.
We walked inside the run down apartment and immediately got to work. To make the money counting process go faster we used a money counter. After putting rubber bands around stacks of money I neatly placed them in the duffle bags that were on the floor. Bobby locked the bags up in the safe for the drop off with his uncle later on while I re-upped on some work.
It was 11:15 when I served my last fiend before heading to school. I was trying to make in time for third period, my teacher Ms. Bell was a bitch and she would do anything in her power to make my life a living hell. Stuffing some weed bags in my pencil case, I put it in my book bag and made my way to the car.
Bobby and I road to Fort Lauderdale High School in silence. The only sounds that could be heard were Ricky Smiley cutting up on the radio. Bobby pulled up in the circular bus loop and sat and waited for me to get out.
“You not coming to school?” I asked when I noticed Bobby wasn’t getting out the car.
“I’mma go handle something I’ll be back later.”
“Iight cool.” I replied trying to disguise my disappointment.
As soon as I made it through the gate the warning bell rang. I rushed to my locker grabbed my things and tried to make to class before the late bell. Ms. Bell was standing at the door and saw me rushing to get to her class on time. I walked in a second after the late bell and was about to take my seat until the evil bitch decided to fuck with me.
“Diamond you are late.”
“How am I late when I made it inside right at the late bell?”
“My classroom rules are you have to be seated before the late bell or you’re considered late. Now take this pass and go down to Lockout.”
“Today is a test
day though!” I yelled feeling myself about to snap. According to Ms. Bell’s grading scale tests were 60% 0f our grade so I couldn’t afford to fail.
“Next time learn how to come to class on time. Now dismiss yourself before I call security.”
“MAN FUCK THIS SHIT!!” I yelled flipping the desk over storming out of the class. I could feel the tears began to build up in my eyes. I couldn’t afford to fail an advance class that would put me in jeopardy of taking another one and I was too smart to be sitting in regular classes. Plus advance classes looked way better on a transcript, colleges paid attention to those types of things.
“Ms. Bell got yo ass?” Cookie asked as I took a seat next to her in lockout. I swear Cookie’s ass lived in lockout; she stayed in this bitch like it was club Wal-Mart or some shit.
Lockout was a place where they sent late students. We had to sit in this cold ass room until next period. Good thing I decided to wear sweats today I thought trying to make myself comfortable in the hard ass orange chair the public school system provided us with. I often wondered where did all the tax money go? Sholl nuff wasn’t spent in this damn school everything was raggedy.
“Where’s Bobby fine ass?” Cookie said filing her nails.
“I don’t know I’m not his keeper.” I sucked my teeth
“You always with him y’all like best friends.”
“Ok and?”
“When you gon’ put me down with him?” she eagerly asked.
The thought of Cookie and Bobby dating made me cringe. Cookie was the only female friend that I had. No other chick would hang with me because they all thought I was a dyke. Even Cookie low key thought that I was into eating pussy. I never shared with her my feeling for Bobby out of fear of losing her friendship.
Cookie was definitely Bobby’s type. Her shapely body didn’t hold a candle to mine but she always had it on display causing guys mouth to drool. Cookie was a high maintenance hood chick. She was the type that only fucked with nigga that was money. Every month she was looking for a new nigga to upgrade her. She claimed Bobby was the love of her life and that she would change her ways if he ever gave her a chance, but I saw right through that shit.
Bitches like Cookie was capable of settling down. Her dumb ass wouldn’t know the meaning of love if I looked it up in a dictionary and handed it to her. The only thing that made her world go round was long weaves, fake nails, designer clothes, and clubbing.
A part of me wanted to be like Cookie. I wanted to know how it felt to have a guy melt in the palm of your hands based off your appearance. Looking Cookie over, she kind of reminded me of Lauren London.
“Diamond, are you listening to me?” Cookie asked popping her gum.
“What you was saying?”
“You going to Knight party with us tonight?”
“Us?” I asked giving her a puzzled look
“Yes Me, Natasha, and Cray.”
“Now you know them hoes don’t like me.” I said giving her a look of disgust.
Natasha and Cray were two hood bitches that my blood couldn’t mix with. One day I called myself trying to chill with them and they did everything in their power to make me feel uncomfortable. I almost had to put my hands on one of them hoes that’ how bad they worked my nerves.
“They do like you.”
“So why they always throwing shade?”
“I don’t think they’re throwing shade, I just think they trying to help you?”
“Help me?” I asked. “Help me how?” At this point I was livid and ready to clock Cookie’s ass in the jaw for trying to come for me.
“I mean look at you Diamond you are a very pretty girl. Hell you can pass for Keshia Knight. You have a body that I would sell my soul for, but nobody gets to see it because you hid it under all of them baggy clothes. Instead of living your life you rather run around the hood acting like you some nigga and shit slanging dope.”
“That’s low Cookie. You think I want to do that for a living? I have no fucking choice I have a fucking little sister to look after.”
“I understand that, but instead of running around dealing that shit you could be with any baller you want and have them take care of you and your sister.”
“I ain’t like that.”
“And that’s your damn problem. You see that between your legs that’s a gold mind. With that fat ass you sitting on you have the capability of living like a kingpin's wife.”
“I don’t want that life.”
“You a damn fool shit, that perfect body going to waste. Shit lets swap bodies, I bet I’ll be walking around here laced in gold.” She laughed.
I ain’t find shit she was saying seriously. I didn’t need no nigga to take care of my sister and I, I was capable of doing that on my own. There’s was nothing wrong with me dealing drugs or dressing the way I do. Teen pregnancy, STDs, baby mama drama would be the least of my worries. There was no room in my life for any niggas, unless it was Bobby. The thought of Bobby made me smile as my mind wondered what he was doing.
