“I couldn’t help myself. I picked it up and went back to the bar. I read the inscription over and over again that night while I sipped on another drink. Having your watch made me feel like I had a connection with you, and I’ve carried it in my purse ever since.”
“So you weren’t the girl that I slept with that night?”
I shook my head.
“And you let me believe that you were?”
“I know, and I’m sorry, but Rachel has tormented me. When I saw the look on her face, when I realized what the two of you thought…I couldn’t bring myself to say it wasn’t true.”
“Damn, woman, what kind of games are you playing? You could have sent me a text or called me. Instead, you left and let me believe that I was Joseph’s father and then you refused to answer my calls.”
“Look how you let Rachel treat me!”
“How I let her treat you?” He shook his head. “Sorry if I was too busy having the hell shocked out of me to monitor her actions.”
I turned my head away from him, staring at customers who were walking to their car.
Paxton
I took a deep breath, trying to wrap my head around the convoluted truth.
“So he’s not mine?”
“No, I told you. You’re off the hook.”
I squeezed my temples with the heels of my palms. I’d come here, wanting my son to come home, and now she was telling me that he wasn’t mine. I smacked my palm on the roof of her car, and she jumped in response, focusing her attention back on me.
“If I’m not his father, then who is?”
“A guy walked up to the bar and paid for my drink. I was upset,” she said, her voice fading. “Seeing you reminded me of just how lonely I was, and I didn’t want to be lonely, anymore. Not when I’d just watched you walk into the hotel room with another woman. I made a stupid decision, and even though I regret it, I don’t regret having Joseph.”
“Why, Jess?” Barely concealed fury emanated from my body. “Why would you let me think he was mine?”
She hugged her body. “You’ve admitted to being selfish. I didn’t immediately correct you because I was being selfish, too. Once I realized that you misread the facts, part of me wanted you to believe it to be true. I wondered how you would feel if he really did belong to you.”
She pressed her palm against her chest, and a sob escaped her. “I want a family, Paxton. I want a happy ending. I didn’t immediately tell you the truth because I wanted you to be his father and I wanted you to love him. Is that so horrible?” Glistening in the soft light, tears streamed down her face in rivulets.
“I know what it’s like to grow up without a father, and I swore I would never do that to my child. But look at me, Paxton. Look at me! That’s exactly what I’ve done to Joseph, and I hate myself for it!” She screeched like a feral animal, her eyes wild. “I hate that in a moment of weakness, I tried to find comfort in someone else’s arms when you were the one I wanted. I hate that because of my negligence, I’ve deprived my baby of his father. I don’t even know his father’s last name. Once he’s old enough to ask questions, what am I going to tell him?”
She leaned against the car and slid down to the ground, her breathing rapid as she struggled to fill her lungs with air. “Ever since I found out I was pregnant, I’ve been afraid. What if Joseph resents me? What if he hates me?” She expelled a shattered breath. “What am I going to do, Paxton?”
Hearing the anguish pour from her soul affected me. I’d been so consumed with my own emotions that I hadn’t stopped to consider what she might be going through. I dropped to my knees and pulled her to my chest. All the anger I’d felt toward her dissipated, and my only thought was to ease her distress. She wrapped her arms around my waist and laid her cheek against me. “What if he hates me?” she repeated, cries racking her body. “He deserves so much more than what I can give him.”
“You’re an incredible mother,” I assured her, smoothing her hair away from her face. “No one’s going to love him the way you love him.”
“I’m sorry,” she whispered. “I’m so sorry. I just wanted so badly for you to be his father and for you to love him.”
Her breathing returned to normal as she began to calm down.
“Jess, you haven’t been listening to me, babe. I know you’ve been under a lot of stress, and believe me, I understand why you would question me. But I told you I loved him, and I do. I love both of you. Hell, do you think I would ask you to marry me if I wasn’t prepared to be his father?”
“I’m terrified you’ll change your mind,” she said softly.
“I won’t change my mind, and my offer of marriage still stands.”
“And what about your mother?”
“What about her?”
“She hates me.”
I chuckled. “She hates everybody, and you’re not marrying my mother.”
Pulling her to her feet, I hugged her to me, relishing the feel of her in my arms. “Where have you been staying?”
She sniffled. “At a hotel in Creekview.”
“You have stuff there?”
“Yeah, I wasn’t going to check out until tomorrow.”
“Where’s Joseph?”
“Mrs. Hawkins is watching him.”
“You’re coming home tonight. I’ll follow you back to Creekview. You can check out of the hotel while I pick up Joseph, and we’ll meet back at the apartment. Okay?”
She nodded, and I opened the driver’s door for her.
I wanted my family home.
Chapter 19
Exercise
Jessica
I awoke to Paxton’s deep voice. “Tell Mommy to wake up.”
The past few months had been emotionally exhausting, the past week especially so. Last night came back to me in a blur, and I realized that I had slept the entire night. “What time is it?”
“Almost ten.”
“Shouldn’t you be at work?”
“Took the day off.”
“Really?”
“Joseph and I wanted to serve our favorite person breakfast in bed.” Joseph squealed his approval while Paxton pushed the door open with his foot, one hand secured around my baby, the other one carrying a tray.
I pushed myself into a sitting position, and Paxton walked around the bed and settled the tray on my lap. He and Joseph sat in bed beside me, and Joseph wielded a large plastic spoon as he took turns chewing on it and hitting the bed with it.
Once I turned my attention to the tray, I laughed. “Cookies for breakfast?” My meal consisted of a huge plate of cookies and a tall glass of milk. I tore a warm cookie in half, and it oozed melted chocolate. “Oh, my gosh,” I whispered, amazed at what this man had done for me. “They have chocolate chips and white chocolate chips.”
“There’s no such thing as too much chocolate, right?”
My heart filled with joy as he mimicked my mother’s words, and not trusting my voice, I nodded my agreement.
Overcome with emotion, I set the cookie back down on the plate.
Paxton reached out and took my hand in his. “I can’t promise they’re as good as your mother’s, but Baby J and I wanted you to know how much we love you.”
Gently clasping my chin, he turned my face until I looked at him. “Look, I’m not perfect. I can be stubborn and selfish and a total ass. But damn, Jess, I love you, and I’m not proud that I let my jealousy and insecurities come between us when we were younger, but maybe all the things we’ve gone through will make us stronger now.
“I didn’t know it at the time, but that night you called me, that was one of the best nights of my life. If you hadn’t reached out to me, I might not have ever known how incredible it would feel to have you in my arms again.”
He rubbed his large palm across Joseph’s soft hair. “And this little guy. I sure as hell didn’t expect him to win me over, but he did.
“When I thought Joseph was my son—once the shock had settled down a bit—I was actually proud. I wante
d to be his father.”
He looked back at me. “But the truth is, it doesn’t even matter anymore. I love him, and I want to raise him as my son. I know you’re afraid, but I’ve thought about it a lot. That day in the ocean, I asked you to trust me. And you did. You trusted me with your life. Now I’m asking you to trust me with Joseph’s life, too. I want us to be a family. Marry me, Jess.”
As I listened to his words, I could hear the veracity with which he spoke. His eyes were focused on me, and his sincerity was etched in the lines on his face. His strong, powerful hand skimmed Joseph’s fragile crown with the gentlest of strokes. He was right. That day when he swam to me and asked me to trust him, I did, without hesitation.
It was time for me to trust him again.
“I can’t offer you a big wedding. All I can offer is my promise to love you and Joseph.”
Leaning into him, I hugged him, and he wrapped his arm around me, pulling me close while Joseph sat between us. Joseph turned to look at us over his shoulder, a huge smile lighting his face.
“I can also offer you this,” he said softly, reaching into his pocket.
He held up an engagement ring, a solitary diamond set in white gold. Timeless and classic.
“Will you marry me?” he asked, holding the ring between his thumb and forefinger.
Squeezing him tighter, I nodded and held my hand out, my fingers outstretched. “Yes.” My throat constricted, and it came out as a whisper.
He slid the ring on my finger. “Does today work?”
I gasped. “Today?”
“Today. Right now. Get ready.”
I squealed as I kissed his cheek, jumped off the bed, and snatched half of the cookie I’d torn apart earlier, cramming it in my mouth as I raced toward the shower.
It was real.
This moment was real.
By the end of the day, I would be Jessica Mayfield.
Paxton
I stopped by the gym to tell Cade there would be a slight change in tonight’s Mayfield meeting. He leaned against the counter, cocking his head as his brow furrowed.
“So you want me to bring Flanagan tonight?” he asked.
“Yes, and I’m bringing Jessica.”
“So first you decide we’re going to start talking about women, and now we’re actually bringing them?”
“Yes.”
“That’s unlike you.” Cade grinned. “What’s up? You need to get in touch with your feminine side?”
I scoffed. “I don’t have a feminine side.”
“Heard that,” Cade said, giving me a fist bump. “Oh, shit,” he exclaimed, looking at my hand. “What the hell are you wearing?”
“Jeans and a dress shirt. I’ve got some boxer briefs on, too, if you really must know.”
“Very funny, but I’m talking about the ring. It looks suspiciously like a wedding band.”
Holding my hand up, I stared at the ring. “That’s why I want you to bring Seren tonight. So keep your mouth shut. Jess and Baby J are out in the car. We’re driving over to Mom and Dad’s right now to break the news.”
“Oh, hell. You’re serious.” Cade whistled. “Mom’s going to shit when she finds out you’re married.”
“I’ll take her a roll of toilet paper.”
A boisterous laugh escaped him. “Can’t wait to hear how it goes.”
“It should be interesting. See you in a little while.”
I hurried back out to the car and headed toward my parents’ house. As I drove, my eyes kept falling to the ring on my finger.
I had a wife.
And a son.
Jessica focused on the view outside the driver’s side window while she fidgeted with her necklace.
“Are you nervous?” I asked, reaching over and giving her hand a squeeze.
“Of course I am. Your mother hates me.”
“If it’s any consolation, we won’t be staying long. We’re going to meet Cade and Seren and Evan at Whiskey Nights in a little while.”
“I wish we could just go there and skip your parents’ house altogether.”
“It’ll be okay. I’ll be with you the whole time.”
Jess tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. “Have you confirmed to her that Joseph isn’t really yours?”
“No, do you want me to?”
“I think it’s better if Joseph knows the truth. That way he’ll hear it from us, and we won’t have to worry about him finding out we lied to him. I think it’s the best way to make sure he doesn’t resent us later. What do you think?”
“I know how hurt Cade was when he found out our mother wasn’t his biological mother, and you’re right, I wouldn’t want that to happen to Joseph.”
She sighed. “Then we’ll just tell him the truth in age appropriate ways as he grows up. I think your family deserves to know the truth, too.”
“I see no reason to mention it today. You and I can discuss that later. Right now, I’m just going to let my parents know we’re married. They need to hear it from me.”
When I pulled into my parents’ driveway, I parked beside Rachel’s car.
“Great,” Jess whispered.
“It’ll be fine,” I assured her. “There is something I should tell you, though. Maybe I should have told you sooner, but I had promised that I wouldn’t. Now that we’re married, my secrets are your secrets.”
“What is it?”
“It’s about Rachel. I know things have been a little crazy, but...her mom has cancer, and it’s terminal. Her mother, Etta, is well-known in Creekview. She doesn’t want anyone to know because she doesn’t want them treating her differently. Rachel confided in me a few months ago, and I promised her I wouldn’t tell a soul.”
“How long does she have?”
“Doctors don’t really know. I suppose it’s made me a little more lenient with Rachel because I know how hard it’s been on you since you lost your mother. I’m sure it’s hard on Rachel, too.”
She took a deep breath and looked away. “I’m sure it is.” Her eyes turned back to me. “Did you say her mother’s name is Etta?”
“Yeah, most everyone in Creekview knows her.”
“I think I met her…when I worked at Mandy’s.”
“You probably did. Mandy’s a friend of hers.”
“Rachel’s mother was always real nice to me.”
“Yeah, she’s a sweet lady. Anyway, keep it under your hat, okay? It’s important to Etta to keep it a secret.”
“Of course.”
We unloaded Joseph from his car seat and walked in the house. Rachel’s face lit up when I first stepped into the living room, but when she saw Jess, her displeasure was evident.
“Hey,” I said as my parents looked up at me.
My dad nodded his head in my direction. “Hey, son.”
“I’m glad you’re here, Rachel.” I had no idea why Rachel would be hanging out with my mother, but hopefully, my announcement would put an end to their shenanigans.
“You are?” she asked, her perfect pink lips puckering into a frown.
“Yes, I have some exciting news.” I turned my attention to my parents. “Mom, Dad, I would like to introduce y’all to Mrs. Jessica Mayfield.”
Except for the fact that it was probably making Jess even more uncomfortable, it was almost amusing the way their mouths dropped open simultaneously. I squeezed Jessica’s hand to reassure her.
My dad recovered first. “Congratulations, son.” He stood and crossed the room to shake my hand.
“And you remember Joseph?” I asked my father.
“Of course. Hey, Joseph.” My dad shook his hand, too, and Joseph rewarded him with an infectious smile and a squeal. “Welcome to the family,” he told Jess as he hugged her neck.
Relief flowed into her features as she thanked him, and I was grateful my dad was cordial because I certainly didn’t expect my mother to be as hospitable.
“You married her?” my mother asked from her seat.
“I did.” I kissed Jess
on the cheek and rubbed her shoulder. “We went to the courthouse this morning.”
Rachel turned to my mother. “I should probably be going, Cheryl. I’ll talk to you later.”
She stood and walked toward us, her eyes appearing almost cobalt in contrast with her soft pink sweater. She stopped directly in front of me. “Bye, Paxton.” Her voice was low, defeated.
“Bye, Rachel.”
She studied Joseph a moment before she turned her attention to Jess. I tensed, preparing to step in if she did anything that would upset my wife.
Rachel took a deep breath, her expression unreadable. “I hope you know how lucky you are.”
Jess was silent, acknowledging Rachel’s words with a subtle nod. It was as if the two women were having some kind of unspoken conversation.
Rachel gave one last glance in my direction and left, her heels clicking against the hard wood floor until she slipped out the front door.
My father turned to my mother. “Aren’t you going to congratulate your son?”
The longer my mother sat in silence, the more annoyed I became. Finally, I crossed the room and sat on the couch beside her. “Mom, you know I love you.”
“I love you, too, dear, and that’s why I wanted you to marry Rachel.”
“It probably wouldn’t have been a good idea for me to marry Rachel since I’m in love with Jess.”
“Love isn’t everything.”
“No, but it’s a good start.”
“I just want you to be happy.”
I glanced at Jess, who was beaming as she handed Joseph over to my dad. Relieved that my father had distracted her, I turned back to my mother. “I am happy.”
My mother offered me a small smile. “I meant what I said. I’ll make sure your dad doesn’t sign the loan papers.”
“This isn’t about the loan papers. This is about my wife. I don’t give a damn whether those loan papers are ever signed.”
My mother stood. “I’m not feeling very well. I’m going to lie down.” She walked out of the room without so much as glancing at Jessica.
Betrayed (Whiskey Nights #4) Page 27
