"Alena, you okay?"
"Hmm? Yeah. Fine. Sorry. Just thinking. How was the funeral?"
Marija smiled. “Good. Beautiful. It is sad you could not come. Jamie would have liked it if you had been there."
"Next time. I guess.” Alena dunked her hands in the warm water and pulled them out quickly. The water was so hot the temperature reminded her of when the stranger had healed her hand. She curled her fingers and realized her eyes were blurred with tears because she was beginning to cry. This over a man she didn't know who had almost hit her. What was wrong with her?
"Alena, are sure you're okay? Is it about Darius?"
Darius. That was the stranger's name. Alena wondered if he had found anything on the killer. Even though she knew she should be thinking about who or what was stalking the pack, she was more concerned with whether she would ever get to feel his lips. Were they soft like they appeared to be? Would they be rough? Would he know how to use them? How would they feel on her skin? On her breasts? God it had been so long since she had been with a man. Since she had been with anyone. Ever since she had run away from the pack she had kept everyone at bay. She hadn't needed walls around her thoughts when she had lived with her parents.
When they had been killed, part of her died too. She had built a barrier around her emotions to keep them contained and to keep others outs. Her relationships had been disasters. The last date she had been on was one which Deborah had set up, and the outing had gone badly. The guy had tried to get into her pants, but she had turned him down because that was all he was interested in. She had to push him out of her place. But he didn't want to go, so she had to use her mind to make him go. He had ended up with a burst blood vessel and in the emergency room. The last time she had had sex was—well, too long for her to count. She had always wanted someone with whom she could be open with her power. And if she dared to hope, Darius would have somewhat of a touch of her own powers. Then, like she had with her mother, they would be able to share her emotions. If that were possible, then she could share her feelings with the man she was having sex with. The blending of her powers had only happened once before and on an unconscious level. The guy she had slept with had a faint touch of her powers, only his were buried so he didn't know what was happening. For her, the experience had made their lovemaking so intense she had an orgasm that cramped her toes and her legs for a week, making it hard for her to walk. The echo of their lovemaking had stayed with her for years. Now a faint memory, she wanted so much to be able to experience that again. Something was drawing her to Darius. Even now, she was still so angry with him, but she wanted other things, too.
The near kiss had made her hot. Her legs had been weak as they stood face to face in the kitchen. Why had he been such an ass? Everything had been going great, and then suddenly he changed.
"Darius, who is he really? Why did you call him?"
Marija nearly dropped one of the plates she was holding. “He is a creature of the moon just as we both are. You know as well as I do he is here to help us find the one who is killing the children of our pack. And, well, he has things he has to work out. Don't let his gruff demeanor get to you. If you feel something for him, then you—"
"Then what?"
The werewolf shook her head. “Nothing. There are things in the dark, in the past, spoken in the shadows that have to be worked out. Sometimes things that are secret and long since buried have a way of digging themselves back up."
"What does that mean?” Alena asked.
"It means nothing you have to worry about.” Vincent walked in and stared at the two women.
Alena saw the looked exchanged between Marija and her cousin. Something was said between them. She hated the fact she did not have the power of telepathy. All wolves communicated with one another in that manner. Her power was something along the same lines of telepathy, but was different, not on the same wavelength. After a moment, the vedma exited the kitchen leaving the two of them alone. Alena stared at her cousin. He had a powerful aura, which made everyone respond to him. She even felt the allure of his animal magnetism.
"What do you want, Vincent?"
He moved across the room faster than she could see. He grabbed her around the waist and pulled her into him. Her body responded to him even though she didn't want it to. His mind touched hers, and she tried not to let him affect her, but the wall around her thoughts fell, and she felt the wolf inside of him. With a couple of steps, he had her pushed back against the counter. His lips claimed hers and she reacted. He knew how to kiss, and with each passing second, the faint burning inside her gut reignited. A soft moan escaped her throat between his stolen kisses before he pulled away, leaving her to catch her breath.
"I haven't had a moment alone with you, and I wanted to welcome you back to the pack personally. When I saw you walk through that door and stare down Ivan and the rest of the pack, I knew you were Morena incarnate. You were my goddess.” He leaned in and let his lips play bite the left side of her neck. If he wished to mate her, he would claim her with a bite and draw blood.
Alena put a hand on his chest. The heartbeat under her palm was faster than a human's. Her action seemed to encourage Vincent because he nibbled her a little harder, but she needed time to think and took in a breath. Her fingers slid over her lips. How should she answer her cousin? That was it. He was her cousin, a blood relative. In the pack, relatives did mate with one another. Still, she wasn't interested in him like that. There was something about Vincent, his animal magnetism, which ignited the burning in her gut, but the attraction wasn't as strong as with Darius, and she hadn't even kissed him. She wanted him, though, even if he was an asshole. Every fiber of her being desired him. Argh. Why am I thinking about him when Vincent is being such a prick? And he thinks he can sweep me off my feet? Besides, Jamie said Vincent had been after me. Even Marija said I was on his brain. Yeah, I know what brain that is. I can't let this go much further or he'll get the wrong idea. Remember, he was the one stalking me at the restaurant like common prey.
"Vincent, I do appreciate the, ahh ... welcome, but if you don't mind, I really want to finish up these dishes and get to bed. I've been working all day. Cooking can take a lot out of you if you're making food for a hundred starving mouths. And feeding this pack is like feeding two hundred mouths the way your stomachs are.” The smug smile dripped off his face as she tried to get out of his grasp, but he grabbed her apron, not letting her escape.
"You ignored my advances in the city, and I really don't like cities. Neither did Ivan."
Alena hardened the wall around her mind and desperately searched her emotions to try and send a bolt into his mind, but she was too tired. “Vincent, let me by."
He responded by yanking on the clothing and pulling her tighter against him. “Now that you're here, you aren't going anywhere.” He guided her hand down to the bulge in his pants and held it there. “I've wanted you for a long time, cousin. I knew before you ran away you were destined to be my mate. Father had no idea what power you have inside of you. The others think you can't change, but I can sense the wolf in you, hidden away in a dark cage. Just now, when we kissed, it stirred, yelping to come out and play. We can have pure children. It took me so long to find you, I don't want to let you go. Can't you feel how much I want you?” He pressed her hand against his hard length. His nose ran the expanse of her neck before he licked a line up to her ear and then nibbled on her throat.
Alena couldn't help but shiver. However, her reaction was not brought on by pleasure, but by disgust. She wanted nothing to do with Vincent. He may have been pack leader, but she was not ruled by anyone. “Oh yeah, Vincent. I know how much you want me,” she said, dropping her voice to a sultry tone.
He smiled as if he really believed she was falling for his lines. She even let a devilish smile touch her lips as she held back a shiver and brought up her knee right into his crotch. The pack leader's eyes widened and glinted in the light when he let her go and fell to the floor. Alena didn't wait to see
what he would do.
"I'll get you for that.” He clutched his balls. “One way or another, you'll be mine. I don't care if I have to bite you to force the change. You will be my mate!"
"Go to hell, Vincent.” Alena ran from the kitchen outside. Tears of anger and disgust ran hot down her cheeks. She stumbled over roots, trying to find some safety in the darkness. The moon overhead was almost full. She felt its power caressing her flesh, but she didn't know how to give herself over to the night. She didn't know how to unlock the cage her wolf was in. What Vincent had said was true. He stirred the beast in her, but Darius stirred her buried half more. The burn was the start of her transformation. Maybe there was hope yet for her to slip her skin. She was old to change for the first time. The oldest werewolf she knew of had been twenty. Granted, there were the humans who were bitten, and if they survived the initial wound, they changed the first full moon. But the transformation was different for pure-bred wolves. The change came on with puberty, and she had pushed her wolf away in order to keep her sanity and to not be beaten to death by her uncle.
Alena wanted safety, but most of all, she wanted someone to hold and comfort her. It had been so long since she had any kind of affection. It was killing her, and she wanted more. She didn't know where she was going, but now, finally in the woods, she stopped and found the hollow of a tree where she sat and rested. There she wiped her eyes and looked at the view before her. She hadn't realized her feet had traveled a path she had walked as a child. Once, she used to love to come and sit out here. At the end of the trail was at a cliff which over looked a lake in the state park. She used to come up here when her aunt and uncle were fighting to get away from the emotions battering against the then fragile walls of her mind. This place held serenity for her. An oasis of emotions never touched her. The only thing which knew how she truly felt was the wind she whispered her secrets to.
"My, my, I guess even wolves need to get away. What happened? Lover boy get too r-ruff with you?"
Alena looked up to see Darius leaning against a tree with his arms crossed over his chest. Immediately, the heat she had felt from before returned. This time the attraction simmered her whole body. She hadn't heard him come through the woods and he wasn't there when she arrived since she hadn't sensed him. Whoever or whatever he was, she had no understanding of it, nor had she encountered it. She wiped the last of her tears away and stared up at him.
"Not that it's any of your business, but Vincent and I are not involved."
"That's not what it looked like a few minutes ago. Both of you were panting."
Alena launched herself off the ground, fury driving her thoughts. She didn't care if she hurt Darius or not. Right now, she wanted to hurt someone. She balled her fist, gathered the energy of her mind, and swung both at the same time. The dark stranger caught her fist and then blocked her mental onslaught, rebounding it onto her. She would have fallen to her knees, but Darius caught her, and she fell into him. Her head felt like it had been slammed with a concrete slab. Her forehead fell against his chest. Silence stretched between them while she caught her breath. Her body seemed meant to be next to his. He smelled vaguely like the forest and something else she couldn't place. Her anger washed away while he made her feel safe. She even forgot what their conversation was about. He had shunned her while they ate, not even saying thank you when she handed him a plate of food, but he had eaten greedily and seemed to enjoy the meal He was a mystery. Gruff to the point he wanted to keep her at bay, yet, like now, and in the kitchen, he seemed to desire her to be close. She couldn't figure him out. He was an enigma, and when she tried to read his emotions, all she got was a blank wall.
Finally, he let go of her wrist and tentatively placed his hand on the small of her back very lightly, as if he were afraid she was going to break. His muscles were hard like a steel frame made up his body. Gently, he rested his head on the top of hers. Alena heard him inhale. She swallowed, not wanting to break the moment. Just being in his arms was satisfying enough. Her emotions were as confused as his. The burn inside her gut reawakened, was held at bay by her own feelings. She broke the moment and looked up, staring into his deep eyes.
"Who are you really, Darius?” she asked softly.
He closed his eyes but didn't relinquish his light hold on her. Their bodies shared warmth as she inched closer into him. Alena wanted him to sweep her up in his arms and open up his mind so she would know how he felt, but he was being cautious. “Does it matter who I really am?” he whispered.
"No, I guess not. But why do you make me feel this way?"
"What way?” His eyes searched her face for the answer.
"One minute you're an asshole. And the next, I want to be in your arms and feel your mouth on mine. I want—"
Darius didn't let Alena finish her sentence, demanding her lips at that precise moment. Once their mouths met, she felt the moon's power zing down her spine. She wrapped her hands around his neck as the fire burning in her belly ignited her soul. Even now, drowning in his embrace, she couldn't read his mind. She wanted to. The kiss was passionate, yet chaste. It was open mouthed with no tongue, slow yet frenzied at moments, as if he couldn't make up his mind on what to do with her or what she wanted. That he had seen Vincent kiss her was obvious, and maybe he was jealous, which was why he lashed out in the first place.
As if in a fairy tale, time stood still as Alena lost herself in Darius. Here was her knight rescuing her from the evil ogre named Vincent. But even while he was liberating her, the dragon was breathing fire inside her belly. The longer he held her, the more the fire in her soul spread outward, wrapping its arms around her just like she wished he would do tightening his grip. The burn was not bad, but she couldn't ignore the sensation, and the longer she was with him, the stronger the urge to slip her skin became.
Finally, time caught back up to them. Darius didn't say anything, but stepped away and turned toward the lake. Alena tentatively put a hand on his shoulder after a moment of him being quiet. She tried to read his emotions again and only came away with a void, like he wasn't even there. He turned slightly when her hand rested on his shoulder. She felt his muscles bunch under his T-shirt. He seemed afraid to be touched as much as he was afraid to touch her.
"You don't have to hide whatever it is you're trying to keep secret from me, Darius. Whatever it is we can work through it."
His response was to laugh cold and cruel. “You make it sound like we're soul mates, Alena. Why would I share my deepest secrets with you when I'm not going to be here forever? Once I find the killer of your pack, I am going. There's no reason for us to be close."
Irritation roped her heart, but she was not going to give up on him. She would break through his walls if the effort killed her. “Okay, so you're here for a little while. I can live with that. Darius, for whatever reason I like you. Can't we just have something in the moment? Even if it is short lived? If you don't want to tell me your secrets, I can respect that. But I like being in your arms. It feels right. I want more of you, and I haven't wanted that in a long time. Do you even want to give it a try?"
Darius stared down at her. Alena sensed a chink in his mental armor. Indecision and heartbreak moved across his soul, and she caught the deepest sense of loneliness like a never ending well. Then his walls were back up. He placed his hands on her shoulders and met her gaze.
"I'm sorry, Alena, but I can't. You wouldn't understand.” He brushed the side of her cheek ever so lightly like a bird's wing and then stepped back into the darkness. Alena watched the shadows wrap around him like a lover until he was gone.
Without knowing why, something broke in her heart. She heard it shatter into a thousand pieces. The burn quieted, replaced only by the light of the moon. She slipped to the ground, feeling his loneliness like the lake beneath her stretched forever and unbroken in the night reflected back onto her. Her head sank to her knees, and she began to sob. Soon tears flowed. Tears of loss. Tears in remembrance of her dead parents. Tears from knowing the
man she cared for didn't want her. Tears for everything that had happened to her in her life. The wall around her emotions had cracked, and the damn was overflowing, leaking from the cracks in her eyes. Before long, it was pouring over.
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Chapter Nine
Even as the shadows wrapped around Darius, Alena's pain sliced his heart. After dinner, he had planned to apologize to her, but when looking in the window and seeing Vincent kissing her, his anger had built, and he turned away. Rage had possessed him. He transformed into his raven form and was going to keep an eye on her to see what she would do, and when she was alone, he would show her what screwing with his mind meant. Then she had run out into the woods crying. He dropped down to a lower branch and watched as Vincent came out of the kitchen red-faced and seething. Something had happened between them. The pack leader had sniffed the air and was about go after her when Marija appeared and led him off into the night.
"You owe me for this, Darius," her mental whisper invaded his thought. "Now go after her and stop your brooding."
He hadn't responded, but followed Alena into the night. She was easy to trail. He latched onto her frothing emotions. His gift at sensing and reading feelings was not as strong as hers, but the ability came with the territory of being a Raven. Alena was like an open book and the hurt in her soul almost reminded him of himself. She was drowning. Darius morphed back to human form, he realized his anger for her had tempered. He wanted to hold her in his arms and take away her pain. However, he knew what would happen if he did anything more than touch her. He would begin to change, and he couldn't bare that. After a moment of letting her cry on her own, he felt the shadows slipping away as his unconscious desire to comfort released his hold on the darkness, and he became visible.
Fur and Feathers [A Raven Saga Book 2] Page 9
