by Ali Parker
Of all the times we’d had sex, none felt like this.
With Ryan holding me against his sweaty body and me pulling him down on top of me, our bodies seemed to fuse together. We formed an unshakeable connection that I was certain I’d never felt with anyone before.
I always knew that I loved Ryan, but after what we just experienced, I no longer had any doubts that he was the right man for me.
“I love you so fucking much,” he breathed.
“I love you too.”
“Really?” he teased. “I couldn’t tell.”
I laughed, but the movement shook him away from me, so I stopped. My nails dug into his back as I held him to me, desperately needing to hold onto that connection.
Ryan felt it too. He settled against me and rolled his head to the side. His cheek hit my chest gently and one of my hands moved to his hair.
I trailed my fingers through it, massaging his head and eliciting moans of contentment with each stroke. His body finally relaxed, and mine followed close behind. Finally, after what felt like hours, Ryan rolled to the side and landed with a soft thud against the mattress.
Without thinking, I moved with him. My head fell against his chest, and just like that, we’d taken up our permanent position. It was one we’d found ourselves in every night while in Seattle and every night since. This was how I hoped we’d end every night for the rest of our lives.
“Are you nervous about the presentation?” Ryan asked, shaking me back to reality.
“I am,” I admitted. “But then again, I’m not.”
“Explain.”
“I’ve done this sort of thing before,” I reminded him. “Presentations. Pitches. All of it is second nature to me at this point. I can win over a boardroom full of men in my sleep.”
“With that face?” He kissed my head. “I know you can.”
“I’m serious.”
“I know, I know. I’m sorry.”
Sighing, I said, “It’s not the presentation that scares me. It’s what comes after.”
“What do you mean?” Ryan asked. “The Seattle office?”
My voice seemed to fail me. The truth of my own fear worked its way into my brain before I was ready to face it.
“Would you go with me?”
The question poured off my tongue. Ryan tensed behind me, his arms still engulfing me in their warmth. I froze. And waited.
I opened my mouth three times, ready to take it back and pretend I hadn’t been brave enough to ask. But I couldn’t. It was out. I’d asked, and now, I needed to hear his answer.
“I would go anywhere with you.”
My heart beat rapidly inside my chest, pounding against my ribcage with all its might. Ryan tightened his hold on me and buried his face in my hair. He breathed me in and then exhaled slowly, blowing his warm breath along the back of my neck.
I shivered and searched for his hand. Our fingers wove together, and we clutched at each other desperately.
Silence enveloped us, wrapping around us to form an impenetrable bubble that nothing and no one could break. Ryan’s words were everything I needed to hear and more. They filled me with the confidence I needed to move forward with the Seattle proposal.
“And Paisley?” I asked, picturing her little face in my mind’s eye. “How would she feel about moving? Leaving all her friends behind? And Max?”
Ryan hesitated as the reality of our conversation sank in. Talking about moving across the country was one thing, but this was no longer just talk. My proposal was complete. All that was left was the presentation.
“Paisley loves you,” Ryan said slowly. He pressed his lips to my ear and whispered, “Almost as much as I do.”
“I love her too,” I said. “But this is big, especially for a little girl.”
Ryan let go of my hand just long enough to brush my hair off my shoulder. Reaching back around, he clutched my fingers once again and laid his chin on my bare shoulder. I could feel his cheek pressed against mine. My eyes closed automatically, my other senses taking over as they always did when Ryan touched me.
“You’re the closest thing to a mother she’s ever had,” Ryan finally said. “Don’t underestimate what that means.”
My back tensed. The breath caught in my chest, and when I forced it out, it sounded shaky. Ryan froze behind me. We both stopped talking and held our breath.
Slowly, Ryan pulled away.
“I’m sorry.” He sat up. “I didn’t mean to scare you.”
“You didn’t.” I jumped up, twisting around to look at him. “No, you didn’t scare me at all.”
“Then, what happened? What’s wrong?”
I paused, trying to think of how best to explain my emotions. So many were coursing through my veins that I didn’t even know where to begin.
“I think of her as my kid,” I admitted. “All the time. But I didn’t want to say that out loud in case you thought it was too much too soon. She’s your daughter, your baby, and the last thing I want to do is step over a line.”
“You couldn’t.”
Ryan’s smile was everything. I lost myself in his green eyes as he leaned in to kiss me. We lingered a second longer before pulling apart and falling into each other’s arms.
We didn’t need to discuss anything else that night. The promises we’d just made said everything that could ever need to be said.
Chapter 83
Ryan
With sweaty palms, I pulled open the door to the Romeo Rebound office and stepped inside. A cold blast of air conditioning hit my face, and I inhaled sharply, trying to clear my head. I marched purposefully across the room.
A few other Romeos were sitting at the long conference table, a couple more by the espresso machine. Two potential clients were flipping through the binder of Romeos, stopping every few pages to drool over a particularly attractive choice. I averted my eyes and walked on.
Just as I reached Beatrice’s office, the door swung open.
Kason’s icy blue ices fell on my face. With a grin, he hurried over. He slapped his hand against my shoulder and turned me away from B’s office.
“She just called,” he said. “She’s not coming in today. I’m supposed to tell you that your meeting has been rescheduled for tomorrow.”
Relief flooded through my chest. I let out a sharp breath that I hadn’t realized I’d been holding. Groaning, I moved quickly to the espresso machine and made myself a cappuccino. Kason stood at my side, watching me with curious eyes as I took a huge sip.
“What’s up with you?” he asked.
“Nothing.”
Kason clucked his tongue and shook his head. “Bullshit, man. What’s up?”
I glanced around the office. Even with B gone, she had lookouts everywhere. Three of my fellow Romeos were already watching us with narrowed, suspicious eyes.
“Not here,” I hissed.
Kason followed my gaze around the room. He nodded with understanding and jerked his head toward the door. We hurried outside and stopped on the sidewalk, turning to face each other while I clenched my cappuccino between my hands.
“It’s a good thing B isn’t here today,” I said. “Because I have no idea what the fuck I’m going to do.”
“What are you talking about?”
My mouth opened, but the explanation was too complicated. Shaking my head, I let my lips fall together as I glanced behind me.
“Lunch?” I asked. “It’s a long story.”
“Sure.” He shrugged. “Why not?”
“Great.”
I tossed my cappuccino, and we hopped in a cab. The silence of the ride gave me too long to dwell on the decision I hadn’t yet made. And with Kason by my side, that decision suddenly felt more pressing and even more life-changing.
As I walked up to B’s office just minutes earlier, I had been conflicted. Max’s offer floated through my mind. B’s promise of more clients and more responsibility did the same. Either way, I would lose something precious. I’d hoped that when I saw B, th
e answer would magically come to me.
The cab driver slammed on his brakes, making Kason and me jerk against the seat. Groaning, we paid the driver and got out. A diner we both knew stood in front of us. I followed Kason inside and sank into a booth in the back.
Our waitress took our usual orders before slipping away. Kason fixed his eyes on my face and waited.
“Max offered me a job,” I blurted out.
Kason snorted. “Again?”
“It’s different this time,” I said. “He actually took me to the office, showed me around, introduced me to the ad sales team and—”
“Ad sales?” Kason winced. “God, that sounds so fucking boring.”
“I don’t know.” I shrugged and looked away. “It’s good money.”
“Romeo money is better.”
Now, it was my turn to snort. “My brother works on Wall Street, Kase. The money would be incredible.”
“Fine.” Kason rolled his eyes. “But is that really what you want? To sit behind a desk every day and—”
“It’s not a desk job!” I snapped defensively. “It’s a collective group of people all shooting around ideas and—”
“Holy shit.”
Kason’s eyes narrowed. Shaking his head in disgust, he leaned back against the booth and glared across the table.
“What?”
“You’re gonna fucking take it, aren’t you?”
My chin hit my chest. Kason’s look of disgust never fell from his face. I could feel his icy blue glare boring into the top of my head, daring me to argue. I’d never been afraid of Kason. Not once in the ten years we’d been friends. But sitting in that booth, feeling his anger radiate around us, I cowered.
“You asked me for this job,” he said, his voice low. “You needed help, and I helped you. Now, you’re just going to bail right when you finally did something right? Right when B is ready to rely on you?”
“I haven’t made a decision.”
“Then, why are we even talking about this?”
“Candice.”
My head snapped up, my eyes landing on Kason’s face. His anger seemed to ebb, but it didn’t disappear.
“I get it.” Kason laughed with humor. “She doesn’t like the job. She asked you to quit.”
“No.” I shook my head. “She didn’t ask me to do anything. She actually promised to support me no matter what I decide.”
“Then, what’s the fucking problem?”
“Me!” I ran my hand over my face to calm down. “How much longer can I do this, Kase? Paisley is almost five. In a few years, she’s going to start asking questions, and what will I tell her? How will I explain myself?”
Kason’s anger slipped away even more. With a sigh, he sat forward and placed his hands on the table between us.
“Look,” he said. “If this is what you want, then I’m behind you. I’m pissed, and I’ll kill you if this blows back on me, but I get it. I do.”
“Thanks, man.”
He nodded and said, “But make sure you’re sure about this. Once you do this—once you quit, B isn’t going to let you change your mind. You’ll be done. For good.”
“I still haven’t made a decision one way or the other,” I said quickly. “There’s so much to consider.”
Kason laughed derisively. “Bullshit,” he said again. “We wouldn’t even be having this conversation if you weren’t sure you wanted to quit.”
Was he right? Had I already decided? Was all this angst just me fighting with myself over the choice I was too afraid to admit I’d already made?
“You might be right.”
Our food arrived. We ate in silence while I disappeared inside my own head. I played out my conversation with B, imagining all the possible scenarios that might go down.
“I know it’s stupid,” I finally said. “But I really don’t want to disappoint B. She helped me out a lot these past few years.”
“I get it,” Kason said through a mouthful of food. “She’s our den mother. We’re all indebted to her in some way or another.”
“How pissed do you think she’ll be?”
Kason sat back. He frowned thoughtfully and stared over my shoulder. Clearing his throat, he shifted his weight and met my eyes. With one look, all my fears intensified. We both knew B was going to throw a fucking fit the second I said the word “quit.”
“She talks about you like you’re royalty,” Kason admitted. “Frankly, I don’t get it. You aren’t that great.”
“Fuck you.”
Kason snorted. “Seriously, though,” he said. “You got the biggest contract in the history of the Romeos. Candice Smart was a goddamn gold mine, and you know it. Beatrice isn’t going to overlook that anytime soon.”
“But that’s not a reason to stay.”
“No,” Kason agreed. “It’s not.”
I picked up my fork and stabbed my food at random. Barely knowing what hit my tongue, I finished lunch and tried to think of something, anything other than my boss.
“She’ll get over it,” Kason said, reading my mind. “I mean, if Candice can get over the fact that you were hired to date her, then I think anyone can get over anything.”
“Screw you,” I said, but we both laughed.
It was true. After going through that drama, there wasn’t anything that should scare me, and yet, I was terrified. So scared, in fact, that my palms didn’t stop sweating for the rest of lunch.
“Have you ever thought about leaving?” I asked Kason.
He shook his head. “No,” he said. “Not really. But I’ve never had a woman love me the way Candice loves you.”
My smile was automatic. Kason rolled his eyes, but deep down, he was happy for me.
“This job isn’t for everyone,” he said. “Especially women. I knew a few guys who tried to have committed long-term relationships and still be a Romeo.”
“What happened?”
“Let’s just say, it wasn’t pretty. A lot of tears. Screaming matches at the office. Horrible.”
“I don’t want that.”
“No one does.”
Sighing, I ran my hand over my face. Kason was right. I already knew what to do. I just had to be brave enough to admit it.
“It’s time for me to move on,” I said firmly. “How could I not? Candice is my future, Kason. She’s everything to me.”
“And you’re everything to her,” Kason said with confidence. “At least, according to Leslie.”
I was in mid-chew when Kason let Leslie’s name slip from his lips. I froze. Staring across the table, my disbelief turned quickly to anger.
“Tell me you aren’t still seeing her.”
“It’s not like that,” he said quickly. “We’re friends, Ry.”
“Friends?”
“Yes. That’s it.”
I didn’t believe him, and he knew it. The way his eyes kept shifting back and forth, unable to maintain my gaze, told me everything I needed to know.
“If you hurt her—”
“Relax,” He snapped. “I’m not you. And Leslie isn’t Candice. She’s not the kind of girl to get emotionally attached, and well, you know me.”
That did nothing to calm my concerns, but I kept my mouth shut because I knew it wasn’t my business. Leslie knew about the Romeos, she knew who Kason really was. If she wanted to risk a broken heart, then who was I to stop her?
Besides, my mind was too busy with other things. Quitting the Romeos. Possibly moving Paisley and myself across the country.
“What do you think of Seattle?” I asked casually.
“Cool city.” Kason nodded. “I’ve only been twice, but it’s definitely hip in its own right.”
“I loved it,” I said. “And Candice is borderline obsessed.”
Kason laughed. “That girl needs to get out more if Seattle made her tick.”
“She works a lot,” I admitted. “But look at the empire she built. It’s fucking impressive.”
“For sure.”
Kason a
nd I spent the rest of lunch praising Candice and talking about my future with her. I told him I was certain this woman was it, that she was the person I was meant to spend my life with.
“I’m happy for you,” Kason said. I narrowed my eyes doubtfully. “I am! Really.”
“Sure.”
“I know I was hesitant at first,” he said. “But I get it now. Seeing you guys together at dinner that night and then the banquet, it’s obvious you love each other. I’m your best friend, Ryan. Why the hell wouldn’t I want you to be happy?”
“Because you’re a miserable bastard?”
“True.”
We snickered and both leaned back in the booth. We were done eating, just wasting time at the diner because neither of us wanted to go back to work. I didn’t have any clients today, and Kason’s date wasn’t until tonight.
Hanging out with Kason made me realize everything I was about to give up. Along with the Romeos, I would lose friends, guys I’d grown close to over the past three years. I would also lose the identity I’d built for myself, one I truly loved.
But as Kason and I left the diner, I found myself looking forward to seeing Candice. Her brown eyes swam in my mind, and my stomach tightened with longing. In that moment, I knew. I would give up everything for a chance at forever with her.
Chapter 84
Candice
Sweet hazelnut syrup filled my mouth, sliding delicately over my tongue and mingling with the rich coffee and creamy milk of my cappuccino.
“Mmm.” I moaned, my eyes fluttering closed with pleasure.
“Should I leave you two alone?” Leslie laughed, glancing at the cappuccino.
Grinning over the rim, I winked at her and closed my eyes again. I made sure to savor every sip of the cappuccino, knowing that this coffee shop would soon be in my past.
“What’s going on with you today?” Leslie asked. She broke off a piece of her blueberry scone and popped it in her mouth. “You seem—”
“Relaxed?” I offered. “Mind-numbingly happy?”
“Something like that.”
