by Anna Hub
“Ah yes, a cousin.” She probably wouldn’t let me in if I were merely a friend.
“Ward Eight.” She pointed to a door then turned her attention to the paper on her desk.
The door was pale blue with a window. I looked through and was horrified to find another door only a metre inside. I pushed on it, but it was locked. I pressed the doorbell and waited until a man relocked the inside door before he opened mine.
“I’m here to see Brayden Shaw.”
He nodded and stepped aside to let me past. “First time in here?”
I nodded as he gave me a warm smile.
“You should have come in with his brother. He was here only a moment ago.”
We walked into a common room, and a man spun around to stare. He wore jeans and a t-shirt; too casual to be a staff member. I'd expected the patients to be wearing gowns like they did in medical hospitals. His eyes traced the air around my head, and I squeezed the handle of my bag tighter.
“He-llo,” he said in a slow voice.
“Hi.” I looked down and steered closer to the man who'd let me in.
“No ...” The patient’s eyes were wide with wonder. “Halo. You’ve got a halo.”
“Oh.” I wasn’t sure what to do, but thankfully we reached another door, and my guide turned to help.
He gently touched his hand to the patient following us. “Thanks, Craig. You can head back to the dining room.”
We walked further, my shoulders tightening as we went. I wished the man would say something to put me at ease but instead he did the opposite.
“Brayden generally seems calm with people he’s familiar with, so you shouldn’t have anything to worry about. If he does get agitated, just give me a wave or push on this button.” He handed me a pager.
Was it too late to turn back? He opened a door and watched me with expectant eyes.
What I saw was not at all what I had prepared for. A sick man lay in a hospital bed with the bars raised. His face thin and drawn, eyes closed and body completely still. A drip line fed into his arm and above that was a cuff connected to a machine. I was dumbfounded, and when I turned to ask what was wrong with him, the nurse was gone.
Brayden breathed gently, his chest rising and falling rhythmically. Overwhelming sadness spread through me: this man wasn’t quite the same person from the restaurant. With his eyes closed, there was no fight within him, he was undeniably vulnerable. It felt wrong to be here. He wasn’t well, and I had no right to have come uninvited. I took a step back, but the lamp beside the bed caught my eye. I stared at the shadows beneath it, wondering if perhaps Brayden was in that other world right now.
His arm rested on the sheet, and I tentatively reached out to touch his hand. My fingers brushed against his and I waited to see if he would wake. He lay still, so I shook his hand and called his name. He didn't respond. I gently lifted his arm from the bed and looked beneath it. My shadow was easily distinguishable, but he didn’t seem to have one. I dropped his arm back in shock. Somehow, that was all the evidence I needed—he wasn’t inside his body right now.
I raced to the door and called for help. “I can’t wake him; something's wrong. You need to wake him.”
The nurse walked casually and led me back into the room. He studied my face. “No. This is what his condition entails. Moments of delusions and paranoia followed by unconsciousness.”
That meant it had been happening long enough for it to be considered normal.
He frowned. “I’m sorry, I assumed the family would have told you what to expect.”
I shook my head.
“We don’t know exactly what’s wrong with him. While unconscious, his blood pressure and pulse fluctuate, which is unusual. And normally, when a person is in a coma or unconscious like this, their brain function will decrease, but scans have shown his mind is still functioning as though he is awake.”
I couldn't think straight. The florescent light blurred my vision as I gripped the railing. “How long until he wakes up?”
“It usually lasts at least a few hours, but it seems to be getting worse. He now spends more time asleep than awake.”
“Then why is he in a mental hospital?”
“Because he’s dangerous when he’s awake.”
I swallowed. “Is it okay if I wait?”
“Sure.” He searched my face, perhaps checking if I was really okay before he left me alone again.
I moved to the foot of the bed and lifted the blanket to check Brayden's feet. They were covered with scratches and bruises. That was one thing we had in common, but I wasn’t entirely sure our experiences were the same. If he hadn’t mentioned the shadows to me, I’d have no idea they had anything to do with it. He knew more than he told me that night in the restaurant. Still, there was no way to be sure how far his knowledge went without talking to him directly. I moved the visitor’s seat far from the lamp and sat down.
A long time had passed before the nurse returned to check his blood pressure.
“We do this every couple of hours.” He switched the machine on, the hum drowning out the sound of Brayden’s breathing. The nurse drew medication into a syringe and injected it into his drip.
“What’s that?”
“An antipsychotic medication to help with the delusions. We’re trying a new one to see if it has a better effect.”
Numbers flashed on the machine but the nurse didn’t appear alarmed. He wrote in the chart before stepping out of the room.
Hours passed and Brayden showed no sign of waking. My stomach groaned—in a different hospital I would have gone searching for a vending machine, but here, the idea of leaving the room was too frightening. Soon, they would probably kick me out, and I would have wasted all this time watching an unconscious body.
Another hour passed and I decided to give up. I shifted the chair back to the bedside and watched my shadow moving. If it took me now, I wouldn’t have fought it. At least, if I landed in the forest, I might have had a chance to find Brayden. I paused at that thought. It was an absurd idea, but I found myself lingering next to my shadow, slowly lowering my hand to the table. Nothing happened. I sighed and turned to walk away when the numb feeling ran up my fingers. My skin tingled as the shadow grew over my hand and I dropped into the seat before I could fall. The fact that I’d been hoping to cross over didn’t make it any easier to bear.
My limbs turned heavy and my vision blackened. Inside, my body felt like it was being torn apart, but I couldn’t scream out the agony. I fought the building panic, knowing that when I landed on the other side, anything could be waiting.
Chapter Four
At first, I couldn’t breathe, and once again my skin stung as though an unseen force might rip it from my body. I clamped my eyes shut and waited until the stagnant feeling in my lungs dissipated.
Darkness surrounded me, and the sound of crickets clicking became louder, as though they had paused upon my arrival and were beginning to relax. The forest floor was soft and moist, sinking as I crouched. I checked the ground was stable before I stood up and found my balance. The crickets stopped again. No other threatening sounds reached me and yet instinct warned me danger was nearby. Something wet crawled over my foot. I struggled to withhold a scream as I jumped to the side. Another warm body collided with me and a hand curled over my lips before I could cry out.
“Shh.” Warm breath exhaled over my neck.
I struggled to break free, but the hand tightened.
“Who are you?” he whispered.
I couldn't reply. He shuffled to the side dragging me with him as he moved. The trees rustled, and the light of the moon crept in to join us. We were surrounded by dense foliage, too conveniently wrapped around to have grown that way naturally. He released, and pushed me away in the same movement and finally I saw his face. Brayden. He looked completely different to the man unconscious in the hospital bed. His eyes were sharp—almost accusing.
“How did you get here?” he asked.
“Do you remember me?” He stare
d at me with fierce eyes, and I struggled to continue. “You spoke to me in the restaurant.”
“How did you land here?” his voice came out cold.
It didn’t matter where I'd landed, I needed to know why this was happening. “You warned me about this—about the shadows—”
“Tell me how you passed here.”
"I went to visit you in the hospital.”
“You shouldn’t be in the hospital. You shouldn't be here.”
I edged further away. “I didn’t know what else to do.”
Suddenly his back straightened, and he leaned outside to check our surroundings. Seconds past and he gradually turned back, his gaze resting by my feet. “If they find you they’ll kill you.”
He must have been talking about the men with the grey eyes. “What are they?”
“I don’t know.”
The crickets chirped again. “The other day I was chased by one—”
He nodded.
“You were there,” I prompted.
“It’s not just them, the ones with the grey eyes. There are animals too.”
Eventually, he leaned back against a tree; his demeanour flat. Shouldn't he be eager to hear my story? Didn't he want to share information so we could find a way to save ourselves? Instead, he closed his eyes, as though he had nothing else to say.
I stepped forward. “You grabbed me when I was being chased. Why did you do that?”
“Your shadow is the only way to escape,” his voice hollowed out—detached.
“Did you push me through it on purpose?”
“The more the shadows take you, the faster they come back for more. The only way to escape is to force yourself back through.”
In the darkness I could barely make out my own hand, there was no shadow. Did that mean there was no way to go back? My chest tightened as I realised I would be trapped with this stranger until morning hit. Back in the hospital, it had been late in the afternoon. Soon the sun would set there and perhaps that was when morning would break here.
I couldn't help wondering if I'd made a mistake coming here. There was something about him that made me uneasy. Not just his silence but the impression that he was lost. Both physically and mentally. Although his posture had been tense under the moonlight, he didn't actually seem afraid. Not the way I was—with wide eyes and shaking hands.
He turned, his eyes wandering blankly before they focused. “Soon it will be morning; that’s when they hunt. As soon as the sun hits, you need to force your way back through your shadow. Throw yourself at the ground, as hard as you can. The longer you spend here, the harder it is to go back.”
I blanched. I’d waited for the shadow to take me from the hospital. I’d almost come by choice but that only made things worse. “And then what?”
“Then you hide from them.”
My lungs swelled with air, but I couldn't force myself to exhale. “But I can’t. It doesn’t work.”
“There’s no other way.” He took my hand abruptly. I wanted to pull back, but he held on too tight. “I’ll try to come back with you.”
“Where are we going?”
He pushed the ferns aside and held a finger to his lips for silence. “We can’t stay here at morning, or they’ll find my shelter.”
I watched the dark tattoo on his shoulder as a guide. I hadn’t given much thought to my nakedness inside the shelter, but now I would be exposed if he turned around. It was a stupid thing to be worried about under the circumstances, but I tried to shield myself anyway.
The forest lightened with the approach of dawn. Brayden directed me as we climbed toward the peak of the valley in silence. Thick vines slung between the trees; harder to move through than the places I’d previously experienced. It scared me to think how difficult it would be to escape in a hurry.
Sweat built between our hands. Most of it was probably mine, but he gripped tighter and pulled me along without much consideration. His footsteps were notably quiet. Occasionally, a twig cracked beneath me, and he turned back with a scowl to remind me to move lightly.
The forest canopy was too thick for the rising sun to create a shadow, but I checked regularly, anticipating the moment the trees cleared and my silhouette would arrive.
The higher we climbed, the brighter it became. It wouldn’t be long before the sun met us directly. Suddenly Brayden stopped. I almost bumped into him then froze when his shoulders tightened. He threw my hand away from his and nearly knocked me to the ground in the process. What the hell was wrong with this guy?
“Run!” he ordered.
Adrenaline flooded my system, and I bolted behind him. The forest and vines seemed to grow tighter in that instant, threatening to imprison us. I thrashed harder, determined to break free. Noises became louder—not voices but grunts, sometimes so close I thought I would be dragged down at any moment. I turned to find a man only a few metres away, his eyes crazed as he charged. I whimpered in terror as Brayden ran ahead. He moved faster and obviously found it easier to scale the slope. I focused on the top of the hill and the sparseness of the trees there. They offered my only chance at freedom. My calves burned, and my lungs had almost completely seized up, but I pushed myself faster.
The man grabbed at my ankle, tipping my balance before he shoved my face into the dirt. No matter how hard I kicked, I couldn't break free. Desperate for air, I sucked in debris from the forest floor and choked, head aching from lack of oxygen as my arms flailed uselessly. Then the pressure eased before I could realise what had happened.
I tilted my head to the side and spat out dirt. The man who'd attacked me jumped to his feet, his gaze was diverted as Brayden threw rocks at him.
He was taking my place. I wanted to help him; to find a way to save him from the fate that threatened me only seconds ago but I was too stunned to move. Suddenly, Brayden ran, and the man took off after him.
I trembled in my place before a cold gust of wind reminded me how vulnerable I was. I pushed on and hurried toward the top of the peak.
There was no sign of Brayden. I searched the landscape desperately, aware of the sun hitting my body and the shadow waiting on the ground. In the distance, the forest cracked. There was no way to be sure if that was Brayden trying to outrun his pursuer, or if another grey-eyed man was on his way toward me. I wished I had it in me to go after Brayden, but I was too afraid. Instead, I threw myself at the ground and suffered the tearing sensation as the shadow swallowed me.
Chapter Five
Passing back left me in agony. I tried to pick mud from the inside of my cheeks, but there was nothing there—as though nothing from that world could travel back.
Brayden’s eyes were closed. I jumped up and shook his shoulder again. Although his body was here, his mind was still trapped on the other side of the shadows.
“No.” I grabbed his face, speaking his name through a tight jaw. But what was the point? I couldn’t help him.
“Everything okay in here?” The nurse appeared.
I breathed deeply, battling to lock my emotions away. “It's nothing.”
“I came in a minute ago, and you were asleep on the chair.”
I couldn't believe this was happening.
The nurse softened his gaze as though he understood my struggle. “I’ll be outside if you need me."
Brayden lay completely still. His eyes were shifting beneath their lids as though he was dreaming. I sat down again, hands still shaking from the chase. I had no idea what he was going through right now. Whether he was safe, or fighting for his life. And he'd risked that for me.
--*--
The nurse had come back and checked his blood pressure twice. Both times it was higher than the last. He suggested I go home, saying Brayden may not wake up at all while I waited. But how could I abandon him with no idea if he would make it through the night?
“How long has Brayden been here?” I asked.
“Five weeks now.”
He must have been admitted shortly after our restaurant meeting. “I
didn’t know he had a history of mental illness.”
“He didn’t,” the nurse replied. “No previous psychotic episodes, no family history. But that’s the way it is sometimes.”
Was he in here because no one believed what was happening or had the shadows made him crazy?
The nurse looked at me, then did a double take. “You’re bleeding.” I wiped at my cheek, but he shook his head. “There’s a cut on your ear.”
I dabbed with my hand and found a fresh smudge of blood. I quickly turned away, eager to find a tissue and cover the injury. Perhaps being in this was hospital was dangerous for me. Falling asleep and sustaining injuries in a visitor’s chair wasn’t normal.
The nurse left me alone again, and I was about to leave when Brayden groaned. His eyes fluttered open, and he winced as I searched around for something to offer him.
“What are you still doing here?” he croaked.
“I’m sorry I didn’t help you,” I blurted out. “I didn’t know what to do.”
He tried to lift himself into a sitting position but his shoulders trembled, and he couldn't seem to find the strength.
“Do I need to get someone?”
“No,” he snapped. “They won’t help me. They think I’m insane.”
I pushed a glass of water toward him.
“You need to leave; you don’t even know me.”
"I think we need to help each other.”
“You can’t help me.”
I shrunk back in the chair. “I don’t have anyone else to go to.”
He turned away, and I wondered if that was his way of dismissing me. At least ten minutes passed, but I had no intention of leaving.
“How did you even find me?” he eventually asked.
I wasn't sure I wanted to admit the truth. “I went back to the restaurant and asked for your number.”
“Wow, you’re the crazy one.” He let out a hollow laugh, as though he was too numb to really feel it. He looked at me once again with a more sombre expression. “There’s no way to stop it.”
