“I’m not in any rush, darling, are you?” He spoke as if he were calm and unaffected, but she felt his excitement against her leg, she heard his breath hitch with each soft moan.
“I want you to come,” he whispered into her ear. “Show me how to make you feel good.”
“I thought you were leaving.” She pulled at the buttons of his trousers.
He grinned down at her, his eyes heavy with want. He helped her shaking hand undo his buttons. “I can stay a while longer,” he said, nipping at her neck. “If you’d like.”
He stood, stripping off his trousers and smalls. The man was beautiful, impossibly so. That lanky boy in London was like a stranger compared to the body in front of her now. This was another secret that Alex kept hidden from her all these years—the other markings on his body. She wanted to trace her hand over the small swallow tattoo etched over the sharp edge of his hip, up over his flat stomach, to the stars on his chest. The marks she had seen before on his hands, climbed up his arms—the same strange markings that weren’t illustrations, but symbols. The small clover just below the ridge of his collarbone made her lips ache to kiss it until he confessed his secrets.
Minnie pushed up onto her elbows and crooked her finger, beckoning him on. Instead of following suit, Alex grabbed her foot and ran his hands up her calf. She melted back into the mattress with another moan. His lips replaced his fingers, his fingers were replaced with the ghost of his body until, at last, he covered her. His warmth seeped into her skin, but he didn’t move closer. Minnie rocked upward and wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling him to her, impatient to feel him against her once more.
Her hands trembled, her breath faltered, as his cock pressed against her. She rushed forward and pulled his lips to hers, needing that small comfort as his weight pushed against her, then inside her, stretching her with a wonderful fullness. But she could not stop the pain. Minnie whimpered, pulling away from his lips slightly, even as she tried to take him in stride. To make no fuss over the matter.
“Minnie?” His frustration was hot on her neck, his exhale long and slow. Alex dropped his head to rest on her shoulder.
She stared up at the ceiling, feeling a sudden sense of loss when he stilled inside of her.
“Look at me.” His velvet timbre faded to something more dangerous, threatening. He was cross with her, and rightfully so. It was a rotten trick to play on someone as honest as Alex.
She puffed out a wary breath, relieved his eyes softened toward her. His hand cupped her face.
“Don’t stop,” she said, reeling from the sensation of him inside her. “Please.”
“I didn’t know…You’ve never lain with a man?”
The simple truth was they desired each other and she didn’t want to deny herself that pleasure because of rules dictated by society. The world would not end because of their coupling before commitment.
“Alex, it doesn’t matter.”
The matter of her virginity was solely her concern, not something to bid upon, contrary to Monsieur Peprin’s thinking, or that of any other man, Alex included. She despised being mooned after because she was pure and virginal. She never felt innocent, especially with Alex around.
“It matters to me,” he said, his voice firm.
Minnie closed her eyes and pressed her body tighter against his, hoping to erase his misguided chivalry.
“Christ, I just—”
“Shut up and kiss me, Alex.”
“I hurt you.” He pushed up onto his hands and stared down at her. “Min, for the love of all that’s holy, look at me.”
Seduction was a tricky business, and apparently an art at which she didn’t excel. If only they could return to a few minutes earlier and forget this uncomfortable discussion. If only she could bring herself to look at him and be rid of the guilt twisting inside of her, chilling the pleasure that was raging within her minutes earlier.
His fingers curled around her chin tenderly, drawing her eyes to his finally. “Have I hurt you?”
There were tears in her eyes, but not because he had hurt her. The pain wasn’t awfully bad, not as bad as what the other girls had warned her about. “Please. Kiss me.”
“Fuck, Min,” he said, the pain of her betrayal so heartbreakingly clear. “I could have been gentler, I could have…”
“I’m sorry. I—”
She didn’t enjoy seeing Alex hurt at her expense. There was no need for complications. They had been playing at this for some time and she wanted him.
“I want this. You didn’t do a thing wrong. I’m not hurt,” she whispered into his ear. “I want you, Alex.” His hips pressed against hers, moving inside, inciting that wild fire within her again. “No one needs to know. This can remain between us.” Alex pushed against her, filling her until she felt complete. “I want to share myself with you. I—”
“Shh,” he flicked his tongue along her jaw. “I want this too.” He nipped her earlobe. “I promise it won’t…we can take our time. I can—” He rocked against her. Then again. Her heart fluttered, pounding against her chest at the mere possibility that she could fall apart and fly away. When he did it a third time, she rolled her hips to meet him.
Her hands fluttered over him as she tried to relax or concentrate or breathe, but it was too much. “I don’t know what to do.” Her words left her in a hurried exhale, the heat of embarrassment climbing to her cheeks.
Her body had never felt as if it were on fire before. She had never felt as if she would burst and melt and scream all at the same time. Minnie wanted for Alex to enjoy himself and she wanted to learn from him. She wanted everything in that moment.
“Tell me what feels good,” he said. “Tell me, and I’ll make you happy.”
“You.” Minnie meant it as a question, but it came out more as a statement. She wanted him too, so all was well. As for what she wanted…well, everything was a start.
He stilled again, staring down at her. “We can stop. Minnie, this doesn’t have to happen. I never—”
“—but I do want this. I do, Alex.”
“I only came to apologize.” His brows furrowed and she worried that this would be the end—a disastrous attempt at seducing the only man she ever wanted. “There—”
“—you’re doing a splendid job.”
“—are no expectations,” he said over her.
Perhaps not on his behalf, but Minnie had been garnering expectations of their paring since she saw him at the dinner party. She dreamt about it the night of the opera, the way he had pressed her against the wall, hidden away, and taken her body for his.
It was the memory of him telling her she was beautiful that brought her lips to his shoulder, her arms around his neck. Minnie shut her eyes and rocked against him, feeling the panic dissolve to pleasure. She wanted pleasure, and she had faith they could find it together.
And with patience, a virtue she never possessed, their bodies worked together and she was no longer afraid. Slow and long strokes drew the wickedest of noises from her throat. Her lips moved over his as he swallowed her moans, keeping the secret they now shared between them.
What started out slow became desperate and hungry for an end she had never experienced before with a man. Minnie moved with him as their rhythm quickened.
His eyes widened as her hand cupped her breast. “God, you’re beautiful.”
“You’ve become a religious man tonight,” she said, raking her fingers over the curve of his arse. He liked that too; his paced quickened, even as he let out a throaty laugh. “I think you—”
He pushed into her hard and drew out a scream as pleasure coursed through her body. She looked up to that smile on his face, so proud, even as she threw her hand over her mouth, blushing.
“Now you’re prudish?”
She felt nothing close to prudish. In fact, she felt a lot like the woman others believed Evangeline to be as her body tightened and it felt as if she had been thrown into a fire. “Alex.” His lips were the only answer she needed,
guiding her as her body tightened and tightened. His hand pulled her hand between them, urging her to touch herself. She did, his hand still resting on hers as if he wanted to learn and study her. The pressure within suddenly uncoiled in a violent snap, pulsing through her body. As she fell apart around him, his pace quickened and his hands held hers over her head as she whispered his name.
Alex tensed above her, throwing his head back, his Adam’s apple moving with each gasp. He pulled out of her, spilling himself over her stomach, slowly crumbling down around her, caging her in against the mattress.
“You’re so much trouble, Minnie.” His touch was tender, his voice the same. “But I don’t think I can stay away now that I’ve found you.”
For the first time, he bent down and kissed her on the lips, sweetly and tenderly, as if he cared.
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
Peprin’s private train car was a royal blue palace of deep sapphire velvet against mahogany paneling and intricate Persian carpeting. It was like the first touch of silk after wearing cotton for years. So rich and luxurious.
Minnie chatted with the rest of the women of their party, half-listening to their idle foolishness about the latest fashions and gossip. Her attention was pinned to the swaying gold tassels of the lamp above Alex’s head. He peeked around his newspaper and winked. A girlish blush instantly rose to her cheeks. He hid behind the paper then while Minnie continued her conversation, mindful that he had now folded the paper and made a joke to the gentleman beside him. He exited the train car and left Minnie waiting.
Monsieur D’Ambreious sat opposite Minnie, eyeing her as he drank his brandy alongside Peprin. Both men sat there, wolves on their heels, waiting for her. When she’d first started dancing as a chorus girl, her flirtations with patrons meant dinners and furs, even marriage proposals. But as she earned a name for herself in le demimonde, men circled, waiting for one to leave, trying to outbid one patron with ridiculous gifts.
She made her excuses and slipped out into the crowded hallway. She adjusted the netting on her hat and walked right, feeling that if he were to go somewhere, it would be near the refreshment car. At least they could talk there without much suspicion.
She averted her eyes away from the other passersby as she made her way down the narrow hallway, the fields of southern France passing by outside. A door opened and she was pulled inside, a hand stifling her gasp of surprise.
“Mademoiselle,” a voice whispered in her ear. “It won’t do to have you scream.”
Minnie pushed her elbow into Alex’s chest and spun around to face him, dragging his face to hers for a hungry kiss. There was no point in wasting time.
“Unhand me, you scoundrel,” she whispered, feathering kisses upon his face.
He didn’t listen, only gathered her closer to avoid anyone discovering them. “I don’t know if I can do this, Min.”
“Of course you can. Pretend you hate me and we will survive Peprin’s party swimmingly.”
“But I don’t hate you,” he said, taking her earlobe between his teeth. “Quite the opposite, in fact.” He licked the curve of her ear. “I might even like you, troublemaker.”
She looked out in the hallway, fighting the way his husky voice shook its way into her body and demanded attention. “Behave yourself, Marwick.”
The low rumble of his laugh echoed around the carriage, drawing her own laugh. “You’ve never called me that before.”
“I’ve called you a great many things.”
“I’ve called you more.”
She kissed him again to silence their silly argument. There wasn’t time to waste on idle chatter when passengers walked by, just beyond the door.
“And if we endure and survive this party, what shall we do after?” he asked.
“Return to Paris, of course.” She pulled away, confused by the question.
“You wouldn’t return to London with me?” His teasing tone turned serious.
Return to London? To what end? “Let’s not talk about this now. I’m sure we have been se—”
“I want to talk about this now. We’re in a tight spot. Of our own accord.” He cupped her face, his eyes begging her for an answer she would never be able to give him. “I’ll ask you again, what are we playing at, Min?”
She gave a soft laugh, ringing with carelessness. What they had was nothing to warrant such a serious conversation. It was just some fun. That was all. A passing fancy. A fleeting passion. They were not the first to carry on such an affair.
“What if we are discovered?” he asked, undeterred by her indifference. “What if I get you with child? What will become of us if I’m not successful?”
She pulled at his lapels and pouted. “Pish posh, Alex. Do you have to ruin this?” He looked unaffected by her charms so she gave him a quick kiss. “We are being careful…in all ways,” she said, wishing to avoid telling him the lengths she was going to avoid having his child. “Have some faith. Enjoy what we have while we have it.”
His eyes widened at her last words, and she felt their weight as well—the reality that what they shared could end. And the realization that she might be averse to such an ending more than she had first thought.
“So modern,” he said, nipping her nose playfully with his gloved hand. “Are you keeping me as your lover?”
“What I lack in money, I make up for in other skills.” She waggled her eyebrows. “Enjoy your trip to the south of France, monsieur.” Minnie gave a saucy wink and pulled the netting back over her face, squeaking as Alex cupped her bottom and squeezed, roping her in for one more kiss.
“Until later, darling.”
Minnie exited the private carriage and adjusted her hat, completely unraveled. She was foolish to believe she could continue on with Alex as if it meant nothing. She was foolish, but she would keep trying, because she didn’t want to consider actually marrying the man.
Alex left next, walking the opposite way while she leaned against the narrow hall of the train car. It rocked gently from side to side, reminding her of that voyage from India, when the world was uncertain. But here she was, traveling besides gray, rocky mountains patched with evergreen and pools of jadeite water. She was on solid ground now, or so she told herself. As she tried to even her breathing and tried to control the flush from Alex’s kisses that painted itself on her pale cheeks, she might as well have been back on that ship, tossing among endless depths of ocean.
“Are you well, Evie?” Peprin said, surprising her as he approached.
The faulty reassurance trapped itself in her throat as her heart raced once more. Had he caught them? Did he suspect she was with Alex when she was supposed to be on Peprin’s arm? He had given her the world, pushed her into the spotlight, removed her from the filthy room at the hôtel grisettes she shared with Vivien and Chantal.
He leaned in, the spicy cologne of his that he nearly bathed in filling her lungs. She hadn’t a sip of champagne yet on the trip, but with the way her head spun now, she was well on her way to being drunk. “Your cheeks are the loveliest shade of pink, ma colombe. Almost as daring as that dress you wore to the opera. Are you keeping a secret from me?”
Minnie closed her eyes briefly, the image of Alex’s smile burning bright in her memory, of his lips on hers. Of their new habit of sneaking around Paris to steal time together, or more often a bed to share their love in. She meant it only moments ago when she confessed to him that it wasn’t serious, but now, when faced with the very wolf who could tear apart both of their worlds, the truth revealed itself and pressed heavy against her chest.
She’d held Peprin off so far with a few kisses and flirtation. That had been enough until now, now his eyes burned with conviction. She might be that alluring virgin to the rest of Paris, but Peprin could claim what was his whenever he wished. And now he’d find her ruined. Except that wasn’t the right word for what she shared with Alex.
“Of course not,” she said opening her eyes. Minnie reached for his vest, running her gloves over the polished br
ass buttons with a flirty smile.
He leaned forward as she tilted her head, unwilling to have his lips steal away the ghost of Alex’s just then. “My Evie, one day you’ll slow down and realize what you have to lose.” He pressed his lips against her cheek, tugging at her waist to kiss her in the hallway, just as Alex emerged from the end of the hallway. “You’re mine. Don’t think of straying for that Irish puppy of yours.”
*
The villa was a fine house, grander than Alex was used to staying in. He wouldn’t complain though, when there was a room solely for exercise, overlooking the ocean beyond the manicured lawn outside.
Alex struck the bag again, the impact rattling through his body. His arms were tired, exhausted even, but he punched again.
He heard someone else enter the room behind him, but he was too focused on the bag in front of him to care much. He pictured Peprin’s face in front him and took another punch, taking a deep drag of air as his body burned. He couldn’t remember when he had come down to the small room, but it had been a few hours at least.
It was impossible to sleep knowing Minnie was a few rooms down and she was forbidden to him. The men all thought she was some virginal temptress, a commodity among the male species for sure.
“You have quite the punch.”
Alex ignored the praise. It meant nothing coming from the man who spoke.
“I heard you were a terrible a fighter,” Peprin said.
He didn’t trust himself when he felt this way. Alex had worked to make his body exhausted, but Peprin was an exception. He would pummel him until he received the money, if necessary. That theater would be his. And once he had his theater, he would convince Minnie to return with him to London. Then he’d be a man of property and power, and would run Millay’s after Ainsworth retired. Alex would finally be a worthy husband to Minnie.
He whirled around and punched the bag again with such force his knuckles started to bleed. “My aim is good when needed.” He faced Peprin, folding his arms so he wouldn’t keep moving even when it felt like he must or he would fall apart. The older man was taller, fit for his age. He tossed Alex a towel and leaned back against the wall. “I know why you invited me, but thank you for the invitation nonetheless,” Alex said. He rubbed the towel over his body, biting back how badly he didn’t want it touching his skin in that instant.
A Proper Scandal (Ravensdale Family Book 2) Page 16
