by Debra Webb
The threat of it hadn’t left him since. It hummed just behind his every waking thought, never really quieting. Never really going away. His only escape was sleep and even then he dreamed. Dreamed of staring at himself... hearing his own voice, tasting his own fear and knowing somehow that he was already dead. The only time that perpetual awareness had slowed, at times ceasing altogether, was when he drowned it with enough alcohol. Didn’t matter what kind. The stronger, the better.
Not even the loving parents he remembered so well could protect him from the fear of that darkness. They had loved him, had protected him as best they could. But he’d always felt separate from them. An emotional distance he couldn’t quite identify. He could replay every birthday, every Christmas, every vacation they’d shared, but it was as if seeing it from some detached place. Pictures in a book. His book, but one that held nothing except impersonal landmarks of his early life which stirred no distinctive reaction.
That emptiness and the perpetual undercurrent of fear marked him as flawed, seriously screwed up.
He let go a shaky breath and almost laughed. This was why he never got close to anyone. Never allowed another human being to touch him. His whole life was superficial... skin deep.
Somehow Jill Ellington was in a similar place. Detached yet eyeball deep in the muck. She couldn’t do this alone. Her ability to deny what she felt was far too strong.
She needed help.
He shook his head. He wasn’t supposed to get involved.
Yet he wanted to go back. Needed to help her for some reason that eluded him.
He was a fool.
More of that panic exploded in his chest.
He shoved the door open and half stumbled out of the Land Rover. He reached back onto the dash for his cigarettes. His hands shook so badly it took three attempts to light one. He inhaled deeply, waiting for relief that wouldn’t come. He closed his eyes and exhaled. The silence was deafening, broken only by the hiss of smoke as he released it from his lungs.
He’d lost complete control once and it had cost him everything. It had taken him nearly a year to pull himself together again. Two months of that year were spent in a psychiatric hospital. Oh the Feds had sprung for a ritzy joint. They’d wanted the best for their top dog-and-pony show. The doctors had filled him full of powerful meds unknowingly sending him deeper into the black abyss.
He’d barely survived.
He took another deep drag from the cigarette. He couldn’t go back there.
The hero the world had once deemed him to be had died in that darkness a long time ago. There wasn’t a force on earth that could resurrect the dead.
He dropped the cigarette butt onto the pavement and squashed it with the heel of his shoe.
Besides, Jill Ellington didn’t need a hero. She needed a miracle. He’d stopped believing in miracles about ten years ago.
Chapter 6
Wednesday, July 13
Kate suffered a grand mal seizure during the night. Her condition had been touch and go for a time, but she eventually stabilized. The doctor was performing tests this morning to determine the cause of the seizure and any possible damage incurred during the episode.
Jill sat at Kate’s bedside, not bothering to restrain the tears that trekked down her cheeks. Her sister was asleep, had been since Jill’s arrival. She had prayed over and over this latest turn of events wouldn’t make things any worse for Kate. And if her sister suddenly awoke, how would Jill tell her that Cody remained missing? The chief had warned her this morning that hope of finding him alive was waning fast. There had been no hits on the Amber Alert. No one had seen him… no one had come forward with any sort of knowledge about him or about Kate.
Richard called to see how things were going. Jill couldn’t bring herself to tell him Phillips had gone. Instead, she discussed Cullen Marks’ recommendation with Richard. To her surprise, he agreed. If no supporting evidence could be found, her options were sorely limited. She had to face that reality. When Richard asked what Phillips thought, she’d at first considered not telling him. It would only make him all the more certain of her only recourse. In the end, she’d told him that Phillips felt confident Kate had killed her husband. What else was there to say?
Jill barely slept last night. Those last few minutes with Phillips kept playing over and over in her head. His fear had been palpable. At first she’d been angry that he’d just walked away. Despite the glaring fact she’d wanted him to go from the beginning. But some part of her wouldn’t let go of the idea that he knew something. Sensed something more than he’d shared.
He made several valid points.
If only she could get the police to look more thoroughly into why Kate had been beaten and where it happened. What, if anything, did the beating have to do with Karl’s murder? Those were answers she urgently needed but no one wanted to bother finding them. They had their murderer, who was clearly not competent to stand trial. End of discussion. Kate’s motives would only sully the family name. Jill should let it be. That was the general consensus. The chief was only dragging his feet with formal charges because it was unnecessary until all the facts were in. But it was only a matter of time before charges were made.
But Jill wanted answers, whatever it did to the family name. She wanted Cody found. Hope bloomed anew as she replayed Phillips’ certainty about her nephew being alive. Why she foolishly clung to that hope was beyond her.
Jill exhaled a heavy breath, her gaze settling on her twin’s battered face. Why would Kate hide her son? What if he’d been kidnapped by whoever beat her? Jill stilled. She hadn’t considered that scenario. Had the chief? What if someone had taken him and that’s what this was all about?
Maybe Karl had been the one to inadvertently allow it to happen and in her grief and despair, Kate killed him. Jill frowned. That didn’t feel fully plausible. Karl wouldn’t have done such a thing on purpose. If a scenario like that had taken place, surely he would have called the police. But, as a criminal attorney, she’d seen and heard a lot that appeared far less plausible. The human psyche was a strange and delicate thing. Maybe some external trouble, such as the loss of her child, had disrupted the delicate balance of Kate’s.
But why wouldn’t she and Karl have contacted the police?
Who had beaten her so badly?
Jill chewed her bottom lip. What if this was solely about the child or money or both?
Phillips was so certain that Kate had killed her husband, but what if he was wrong? He couldn’t be absolutely certain. It wasn’t like he’d been there. His success rate was only about forty percent.
Funny how she tossed those percentage points around to best suit the scenario she preferred.
One thing was certain, she would never know what happened if she didn’t get out there and find out for herself. No one else was going to do the job. Renewed enthusiasm revved inside her. If she could find Cody, this mystery would unravel itself. Kate would want her to find the truth. She placed a gentle kiss on Kate’s forehead and pressed the buzzer to let the nurse know she was ready to leave. Jill intended to start her own investigation. She didn’t need the police or Paul Phillips.
Movement beneath the bed sheet jerked Jill’s gaze downward. She drew the cover back and watched, startled, as Kate’s right leg trembled for ten or fifteen seconds before growing still once more. Kate slept through the episode, her respiration and heart rate remaining the same according to the monitors.
“You ready to go, Miss Ellington?” the nurse asked from the door.
Jill looked from her sister to the nurse in confusion and no small amount of fear. “Kate’s right leg suddenly started shaking. Has that happened before?”
Sympathy shadowed the nurse’s expression. “I’m afraid so, Miss Ellington. It happened several times last night. The doctor is running tests to try and determine if the episodes have anything to do with the seizure.”
Jill nodded slowly, defeat tugging at her. What was happening to her sister? She smoothed the she
et back over Kate and pressed another kiss to her forehead. Somehow she would find the answers... she wouldn’t let Kate down.
~*~
Twenty minutes later, Jill parked in front of Kate’s High Point mansion. She emerged from her car, unable to take her eyes off the yellow crime scene tape that marked her sister’s home as a place where tragedy had occurred. The tape fluttered in the on again, off again breeze, running a chill over her skin despite the suffocating heat. High Point was an exclusive housing development on a ridge overlooking Paradise. Most of the homeowners were local professionals either at MedTech or the thriving fertility clinic, LifeCycle.
Karl Manning had been a wealthy man. His family would certainly be a ripe target for kidnapping. The theory was definitely worth looking into. Why the hell hadn’t the chief investigated this avenue? She supposed he may have but he certainly hadn’t mentioned it. Jill studied the homes of the surrounding neighbors on the cul-de-sac as she formed her plan of action. Why not start right here?
She moved up the paved walk of the house to the right of Kate’s. Though the residents of Paradise had always been considerably more affluent than their counterparts in other small Tennessee towns, this, she studied the sprawling home, was not old money whose roots went back more than a hundred years. This was new money, the kind earned in recent decades.
People like Karl Manning built their houses high above those he wanted to impress. He and his new money could look down on those who had struggled for generations to pass along their dwindling wealth to their heirs. Karl resented having to earn his standing in the community despite the fortune he’d amassed. That was one of many things Jill hadn’t liked about him.
She pushed her personal feelings aside and pressed the doorbell. The door opened immediately, as if someone had watched her approach. A young woman with Asian features and holding a squirming toddler in her arms stood on the other side of the threshold.
Dark eyes widened. “Kate?” She gasped. “I didn’t know you’d been released!”
“I’m sorry,” Jill hastened to explain. “I’m her sister, Jillian.”
The young woman’s expression immediately turned guarded. “Oh, sorry. May I help you?” Her tone had dropped somewhere in the vicinity of the Arctic.
“Are you the lady of the house?” Jill pushed a pleasant smile into place.
“No. Mrs. Radcliff is at the clinic. Would you like to leave a message for her?” She swayed when a boy of about four crashed into her legs. “Roman, stop that,” she scolded.
“Are you the nanny?” The woman looked entirely too young to be the mother of two.
She shifted the toddler to her other hip. “Yes.” She frowned then. “I don’t mean to be rude, but I’m very busy right now.”
Jill tacked her sagging smile back into place. “I apologize for the intrusion.” She extended her hand. “As I said, I’m Kate’s sister and I wanted to ask you a few questions that might help her.”
The woman’s expression froze, as did her hand, just shy of reaching Jill’s. “I’m afraid I can’t tell you anything about the Mannings.” She drew her hand back and lifted her chin into a more wary tilt. “You’ll have to excuse me, I have the children to attend to.”
Neighbors had always been close in Paradise. Jill didn’t understand this reaction. She flattened her palm against the door and held it open a moment longer. She needed answers. “What about the children? Did Roman ever play with Cody?”
Uncertainty flashed in those dark eyes. She hadn’t anticipated that question. Or Jill’s persistence. “No. Never.”
Jill scoffed. “You’re telling me that two rambunctious little boys living this close together never managed to share the same outdoor playtime.”
She shook her head. “Cody attended the MedTech Child Development Program. He was never home.” She seemed relieved that she’d come up with what sounded like an irrefutable answer.
“I see. Well, thank you anyway.”
Jill knew fear when she saw it and this woman was scared. Once she’d recovered from the initial surprise of seeing Kate’s identical twin, she’d done okay until Jill asked that one unexpected question. Why would anyone tell her not to answer questions about Kate? That was exactly how it felt. And it didn’t make sense.
“One more thing.” Jill turned back, once more preventing the nanny from closing the door. “Did my sister and her husband quarrel frequently?” The question came out of nowhere, surprising Jill almost as much as it did the other woman.
She shrugged. “I... ah. I wouldn’t know.”
Jill nodded. “Thank you again.”
This time it was the younger woman’s voice that stalled her departure. “Miss Ellington?”
Jill hesitated, her heart racing at the prospect of gleaning some tidbit after all.
“Don’t bother going across the street. No one’s home. And they don’t have any children.” She glanced around the yard as if fearful someone would overhear her. “You shouldn’t waste your time here. The police have already talked to everyone. No one here knows anything.”
The door promptly closed.
Despite the woman’s warning, Jill spent the rest of the day going from door to door. When she’d been to every house in High Point, she dropped by Kate’s medical doctor’s office. Then the library. Kate loved to read. She’d told Jill about taking Cody to the library even as an infant. After that, Jill hit the market and shops where she knew Kate most likely shopped. She had shocked most of the citizens before the day was through. They all thought she was Kate. Apparently the whole town had forgotten all about Jill. Of course, the moment she’d made the correction there was a new set of questions to be answered. When did you get back into town? How’s your law practice? Are you married yet?
In the end, the story of the Manning family was always the same. Kate was a wonderful mother. Cody a lovely child, obedient and so intelligent. And Karl, he was a perfect father and husband. The Mannings were touted as a storybook family. No one could think of a thing negative to say. And no one had seen Cody since that fateful day. It was such a tragedy. Not one of the people she interviewed could believe it happened.
By the time Jill parked in front of the garage behind her mother’s house, it was almost dark and she was ready to cry with defeat and exhaustion.
Her mother was waiting for her at the back door. “Where have you been?”
Jill was taken aback by the question and her tone. “I’ve been following leads. Has something happened?” Her heart fluttered.
Claire stepped aside so that her daughter could enter through the kitchen door. “I want to know exactly what you’ve been doing all day.”
Jill tossed her purse onto the oak breakfast table and dropped into one of the Windsor back chairs. She kicked her shoes off. Her feet were killing her. “I told you. I’ve been running down leads on Kate’s case.”
“You’ve been talking to people,” her mother accused. Her chin jutted out at a defiant angle, her slender shoulders rigid with outrage.
Jill couldn’t fathom what this was all about. “Yes. I have.” She massaged one foot. “Why are you so upset?”
“Would you like a glass of iced tea?”
Talk about split personality. “Sure. I’d love one.” It hit her then that she hadn’t eaten all day and she was suddenly starved. As soon as she caught her breath she’d make herself a sandwich. But first, she had to figure out what was going on with her mother.
Claire busied herself with preparing two glasses of iced tea, carefully placing a wedge of lemon on the rim of each. When she’d completed her task, she joined Jill at the kitchen table that had served Ellingtons for more than a century.
“Chief Dotson called me,” Claire announced after tasting her tea.
Jill almost choked on her first sip. “Have they found Cody?” Anticipation pounded in her chest. Why hadn’t her mother said something right at the start?
Claire shook her head. “It wasn’t about my grandson. It was about you.”
>
The anticipation drained away, leaving a deeper sense of exhaustion. “Me? Why did he call about me?”
Claire folded her hands primly on the table and studied them, anything to avoid meeting Jill’s gaze. “He said you’d spent the entire day going all over town asking questions about your sister and her marriage.”
Dumbfounded, Jill could only shake her head in confusion. She worked hard at keeping a respectful tone with her mother. Sometimes, like now, it was difficult. Jill had always tended to speak her mind, Kate was the more discreet one. What she’d done today shouldn’t surprise anyone, least of all her mother.
“That’s true.” No need to lie. “I hope to find some lead on what happened to Cody and why Karl is dead. I would think you’d be interested in that as well.”
Claire cut her a sharp glance. “Of course I’m interested in the welfare of my grandson. And certainly I would like this whole business solved. Put to rest once and for all. It’s you who’s creating trouble.”
Trouble? “What on earth are you talking about?” All thoughts of food or fatigue evaporated.
“How much more humiliation do you think this family can withstand? The chief is attempting to find some way to work this out for the best. Can’t you see that?”
Stunned, shocked, neither of those things were an adequate description of how Jill felt at the moment. “Aren’t you the one who demanded I come home and fix this problem?”
“That was before that man showed up.”
That man? Anger rippled through Jill. “Why don’t we get to the heart of the matter, Mother?” Jill suggested with cold calculation. “There is only one adult member in this family besides me and Kate. So if I’m not humiliated by my actions, and, God knows, Kate isn’t, then it must be you. Would that be an accurate deduction?”
“Don’t use your lawyer talk on me, young lady,” she snapped. “I will not have you coming here and working against what’s right. The Judge would turn over in his grave if he could see you now.”
