by Lake, D. K.
I looked down at the ground and wiggled my toes in the sand, my skin looked tanned with a shimmery glow and my toenails had been painted pink. Pink? I was more of a black or turquoise nail polish type of girl.
I looked back at the sand. It felt so good, so real. Then I noticed I was wearing a white bikini with gold edging. Yep, this was definitely a dream, I wouldn't be seen dead in a bikini.
I wasn't a bikini girl. I wasn't even a beach girl. I liked to keep my legs covered and my boobs hidden. I wasn't ashamed of my body or anything but I wasn't totally comfortable with it on display. I sometimes stripped off in our garden back at home when it was warm and I was trying to color my skin, but it was a rare thing. I never tanned and I never wore a bikini. I was a milky-skinned hermit.
I had on one of those crocheted white dresses over the top of the bikini that came to the top of my thighs, the type of thing I had only ever seen on TV or in magazines.
I didn't really understand why anyone even wore them, they were see-through and didn't cover anything or keep you warm, but they did look pretty and kinda sexy.
I heard someone of the male variety clear his throat behind me.
I slowly looked over my shoulder, not really knowing whom I was expecting to see...Lane, Josh, my dad, the old man that used to live next door, the mailman, a deadbie, but instead, I found Drew looking back at me.
He was casually leaning against one of the palm trees with his hands in his pockets, watching me.
How long had he been there?
"Drew," I smiled.
"Hey, Pretty."
He had this killer smile on his face and he looked like he had cleaned up, not a speck of dirt in sight, wearing a loose green t-shirt and khaki shorts and he was barefoot, like me. His hair was still green, but I couldn't imagine him any other way, and he had it flipped over to one side and it looked slightly wavy. He reached up and tucked it behind his ear self-consciously as though he knew I was studying him.
"Where are we?" I asked.
"I don't know. The beach?" He chuckled.
"I'm dreaming? This is a dream."
He smiled, and pushed himself off the tree and started to walk my way. My heart fluttered and drummed a little faster. What was that?
"I guess so." he agreed.
He looked out at the sea and I followed his gaze towards the sunset.
"It's beautiful." I whispered.
"It sure is."
I looked back at Drew and found him staring at me, not at all interested in the sunset anymore and I felt my cheeks flush red.
"Why are you here?" I asked.
"You tell me? Your dream, remember?
"Am I dead?"
"And if you are?"
"Then this place doesn't seem so bad, it's an improvement over the last."
Drew grinned at me and I noticed his jaw was smooth from stubble, and his ear tunnels matched his green t-shirt. I also spotted a few freckles I had never noticed before.
The sea breeze whipped my hair around my face and I realized my hair was longer like it was before, falling around my shoulders in soft brown waves. I quickly held onto it and twirled it in my hand and kept hold of it. I shivered a little from the burst of cool air and Drew stepped closer to me...and a little closer, edging ever so nearer.
I wasn't sure what he was doing or what was happening so I just stayed where I was, watching the sunset.
I felt a warm arm slip around my shoulders and gently pull in.
I turned my face and rested my cheek on Drew's chest. His t-shirt smelled of the sea air with a blast of ocean spray, but then again I was outside and everything smelled of the ocean, but I recognized the smell, it was Drew's scent, and this was how I remembered Drew when I thought of him. Maybe that's why I was dreaming of the ocean.
The strange thing was I couldn't even remember what I supposed to be doing or if there was anywhere important I was meant to be.
"Drew, I don't remember anything. What am I supposed to be doing?"
"If you can't remember, does it matter?"
"No, you're probably right. But I can't shake the feeling that I need to be somewhere."
"It can't be that important if you can't remember where it is you're supposed to be. Anyway, where could be more important than here with me where you get to enjoy my awesome company."
"Right." I laughed softly.
"Hey...Alex?"
"Hmm?"
"I...I'm sorry."
"What have you got to be sorry about?" I lifted my cheek off his chest and had to crane my neck to look up at him.
"I don't know...I'm not really sure myself."
"You don't have to say sorry to me, all you've done is look after me. I wouldn't be here if it wasn't for you... I think? My memory is a little hazy right now."
"I don't want to go." he said quietly.
"Where are you going?"
I tried my hardest to remember where it was he was going or why he was leaving me, and where I was supposed to be but I came up blank.
"Don't go." he suddenly pleaded. "We can leave right now, together!" The desperation in his voice unsettled me and the sky instantly darkened.
"Wh-what are you talking about?"
He didn't say anything and just kept staring at me.
"Drew, what is it?"
I watched his desperate eyes as they searched my face and fell to my lips.
"Drew?" I whispered.
My heart was suddenly beating that little bit faster and my breathing had changed. He took a step closer so we were nearly toe-to-toe, and our faces were mere inches apart.
"Drew, please." This time when I said his name it wasn't because I was scared or worried anymore, it was because I was asking him to kiss me.
I wanted Drew to kiss me. I wanted to feel his lip against mine. His eyes dipped to my lips again and back up to my eyes once more before he pushed his hands into my hair, pulling me closer and closing the distance between us, and before I could blink his lips were on mine.
Drew was kissing me.
I closed my eyes and kissed him back, and slid my hands around his neck, lacing my fingers into his hair and pulling him closer. I needed him closer.
The kiss started out sweet and gentle, but then something changed and it became desperate. I had this gut feeling that something bad was going to happen, and I think he knew it too. Why did this feel like we were saying goodbye?
His hands were all over me, making my skin hot wherever he touched me, our lips working together in wild desperation. I felt so alive. He kissed me with so much force, so much want, so much need, so much. So much.
But why did this feel so...so final? Was this really goodbye? I couldn't remember.
"Alex!" Lane's voice brought me back down to earth.
Lane. I loved Lane. But why was I kissing Drew?
The dream was messing with my head. What was happening? And why couldn't I remember anything?
Drew's lips left mine and I opened my eyes, breathing hard. But he was gone. I spun around and saw Lane standing a little way down the beach near the water.
"Come on, what are you doing over there?" Lane laughed and jogged into the sea and dived under.
I looked over my shoulder for Drew, but he was gone.
Why was I getting déjà vu, did he disappear a lot?
"The water's lovely, what are you waiting for?" Lane called, shaking his head and flicking water droplets off his hair.
I shook my head and smiled at him, his big goofy grin always managed to make me smile.
I walked to the edge of the shore and dipped my toes in the water. The water was cool and felt amazing. I lifted the dress over my head and flung it behind me and waded into the water. Lane was already miles ahead of me in the distance, floating on his back.
The sun felt hot on my skin...a little too hot.
I glanced back at the beach one last time, but there was no one there.
When the water reached my hips, I decided to dip under to cool off. I held my breath
and closed my eyes and went into the water.
I woke up with a jolt, sitting up, and gasping for air.
Stupid dream. I had been having the same dream for weeks now, ever since I work up from my coma it had been the same. I was always on a beach and I always ended up kissing Drew, like it was the last time we would ever see each other.
I pressed my hand to my chest and felt my pounding heart beating rapidly. I saw Lane curled up beside me fast asleep, having stolen most of the blanket for himself. My heart rate was just starting to calm down when I spotted the shadowy figure of someone sitting in the chair beside the door and I nearly screamed. My brain automatically told me that deadbies don't sit in chairs so I knew it wasn't a deadbie which was the only reason stopping me from screaming. My eyes soon adjusted and I realized it was Drew sitting in the chair, watching me with his crossbow on his lap.
"Drew! What the hell are you doing?!" I whispered, climbing off the bed.
I hurried over to him and grabbed his hand and pulled him out of the chair and then out of the door and into the hallway.
"Bad dream?" Drew asked, cocking an eyebrow at me with a smirk on his face.
"Never mind that. What are you doing sitting in the dark watching me?"
"I was just checking in on you both and sat down for a sec."
"I don't believe that."
"Then don't believe it. My legs hurt so I sat down." He shrugged.
"Where's Nick?"
"He woke up when I took over from Lane and then he came upstairs and went into the other bedroom."
Drew went to leave but I grabbed his arm, being careful not to touch his bullet wound, and he stopped and looked down at where I was holding onto his arm.
"Is it true?"
"What?...That I'm a stalker?"
"You did hear us." I let go, feeling bad that he had overheard us talking about him, but I shouldn't feel bad, I never said anything bad about him, did I? No, I said he was protective of me.
"Is it true you asked Ross to break you into the university grounds to see me?"
"No." Drew brushed it off with a yeah right expression on his face but it looked like he had just been caught off guard. I didn't think he had heard us talking about that.
"So you never once asked about me?"
"No, I did ask about you."
"You did?" I asked with a little too much excitement.
"Yeah, I asked him if you were dead or not."
My face dropped and I looked away from him so he couldn't see how hurt I looked. Maybe I had read him all wrong. I thought he cared about me but then he said things like that which made me doubt it. When I turned around he was already jogging down the stairs. I wasn't tired anymore, and I didn't think I would be able to get back to sleep even if I tried.
I quietly tiptoed down the stairs and found him sitting on the wooden coffee table. I hovered in the living room, not sure what to do. I didn't really want to sit upstairs on my own while Lane slept so I finally walked around the couch and sat down on the edge. The light from the candles flickered and I saw the stitch job he had done on the top of his arm as he rolled up his sleeve to check on it.
"Wow. I could have done a better job blindfolded." I said, leaning closer to get a better look. He lifted his eyes to meet mine and glared at me, the ends of his hair falling over them.
"I'm just sayin' that I could have done a better job, and you need to cover that up." I hopped up and was about to go and find the bandages when Drew reached out and grabbed my hand, stopping me from leaving.
"What?" My breath caught in my throat, waiting for him to make a move or say something but he just passed my a chunky candle and pushed it into my hand.
"You'll need that."
I quietly sighed and made my way into the kitchen. I didn't know what I was expecting to happen. I was really starting to think I had got Drew all wrong. I was just an inconvenience to him and the sooner he got me to Washington the better.
I collected the First-Aid box and walked back to him and sat on the edge of the coffee table next to him and picked out what I needed from the box. There wasn't much in there and we would need to find more clean bandages at some point. I held the bandage in my hand, looking at his arm and found myself running my fingers along the jagged mess he had made.
"What are you doing?" Drew's voice made me jump.
"Nothing. Just looking at the hack job you did on your arm." I replied, quickly wrapping it around his arm. "I'm glad your arm took the bullet and not your head."
I saw the small smile on his face before he started talking, "So Nick and Lane...I'm guessing they have different parents?"
I had been waiting for him to bring it up. I was surprised Lane hadn't dropped it into the conversation before now, but then again he never told me his brother was adopted, he didn't even tell me he had a brother until we met Crystal and Thom. That seemed like years and years ago now. I felt like I had been living in this nightmare for over a decade when realistically I knew it wasn't that long, it just felt longer.
"He's Asian. Nick's mother used to work for Lane's mom, and his family adopted him because his mom didn't really want him and they thought they couldn't ever have any children but then Lane's mom got pregnant with Lane and they ended up with two children. I was a little surprised as well when I woke up and Nick greeted me. I didn't believe him at first, I thought it was a case of identity theft."
We were silent for a moment before Drew finally spoke first, "So you're definitely going then?" he asked.
I sighed. "I have something that could help hundreds of people."
"You really believe your blood can cure the world?"
"Nick seems to think so and he's the scientist, right?"
"You may be cured but that doesn't make you immune. He may have reinfected you once but it might not work that way a second time. If you get bitten again you could get reinfected."
"I already know that."
"Is this really worth it? You could get killed doing this, D.C. is a long way away."
"I know, Drew. Don't you think I haven't thought about this?
I don't want to go, but this isn't all about me. It's about saving the people we have left if they get infected. If a cure was produced it could be distributed and could save a lot of lives."
"But it still wouldn't stop them. They'll always be more of them than us."
"Yes, but if they got it under control, then we would have a chance. They could put all the survivors together and start some sort of mass cull of the deadbies...it would take years and years, but eventually, they would die off."
"So living in isolation in some government facility with a bunch of strangers is ok, that's how you'd want to spend the rest of your life?"
"That's just a random idea I came up with, I don't know what the government has in the works. But a cure will certainly help. I can't not go, it'd be selfish of me."
"We could leave right now." he said, desperation seeping into his voice, his eyes fixed on mine.
"What?" I breathed.
We could leave right now, it was exactly what he had said in my dream.
"I mean, if you wanted to." he said casually, his demure changing in an instant. "You know, if you change your mind I'll take you back to the prison."
"And why would you do that? I wouldn't want to put you out anymore." I tied off the bandage that had taken me far too long to wrap around his arm, I just liked holding onto him for some reason. I accidentally squeezed his arm a little too tight and he winced.
"Sorry." I mumbled, quickly packing the rest of the bandages away.
"I'm just giving you a choice." Drew said.
"I know, but I've made up my mind. I'm not looking forward to traveling so far and not knowing what we'll face, not knowing who will end up dead next. I'm scared. We've already lost so many people, I hate the thought of losing anyone else, and the idea of being outside again after so long inside, it scares me. But I have to do this. Nick saved my life, I owe it to him to get him there safel
y and help him in any way I can."
Drew nodded and rested his arms on his bow, looking at his feet.
"What time is it?" I asked, moving back onto the couch and tucking my legs up.
"After five, 'bout another hour and the light will be coming up. We should clear out as soon as possible, just in case they come looking for us."
I nodded in agreement, yawning, feeling tired all of a sudden. I rested my head on the arm of the couch and stared at the candle nearest me, the flame flickering in the darkness.
"Hey," Drew slid along the coffee table, blocking my view of the candle. "I'm not gonna let anything happen to you, okay?"
I tried my best to muster up a smile but it was weak. The idea of going back outside scared me, but if I was going to make it there in one piece I had to suck it up and get over my fears. In a few hours, I would be back outside, trying to survive and fighting for my life...and everyone else's.
My eyelids felt heavy and I closed them for a moment, listening to Drew's voice as he read out the crossword puzzle to himself. His voice sounded like coffee and cream and soon soothed me to sleep.
Chapter 12
"Alex, wake up!"
"Hmm...no, I'm sleeping."
Lane laughed. "I know, but you need to wake up."
"Just five more minutes." I said, keeping my eyes firmly shut.
"You said that ten minutes ago."
He tickled my neck and I squirmed away.
"Come on, Alleycat. Get up! We're just grabbing what we can and then we're gonna hit the road."
"Literally, that might hurt?"
"Haha." Lane's chuckle faded as he left the room.
I forced both eyes open. The extra sleep had made it harder to get up and now I felt worse. I just wanted to sleep all day.
I stretched out and something cold slid down the side of my face and I caught it. It was Drew's pocket knife. I doubted he had left it next to me by accident. I slid it into my boot and smiled to myself, this was Drew's way of silently telling me he wasn't going anywhere. Nick walked into the room with a pink backpack that had white daisies all over it and dumped it on my lap.
"That one's yours, better see what you can find. Look what I found, my size, can you believe it?" Nick said excitedly over a pair of beige slippers that actually looked like a pair of ladies slippers. He did have a thing for slippers, and he did have weirdly small feet, but I had no idea when he planned on wearing them.
