Phwoar and Peace

by Andie M. Long

  “Has there been any strange happenings at your end?”

  “Other than weretriplets and arguments under the sea? No.” Mum shook her head even though Ebony couldn’t see her. Then she looked at me and her eyes widened.

  “Oh, actually, there might have been something…”

  She put the phone away and looked at me. “So, if you didn’t hear her shrieking down the phone, Ebony believes the war is starting. It’s possible that this is why you’ve grown to adulthood. Let’s get you checked over straightaway.” She removed the silence spell from Dad and whizzed us straight out of there.

  Dominica met us at the caves and gave me a full physical exam and checked my bloods etc. “There’s nothing untoward. You’ve just had a growth spurt.” She reassured me.

  “We think it might signal the start of the great war, so please advise everyone here to be on the alert.” Mum told her.

  “We will. Although we’re always on the alert here anyway.” The caves were a place where enemies were held captive as well as a place for healing. “If you need us to rally, just say the word, Charlie.”

  It was strange being spoken to with such reverence, and the focus not being on Mum but on me. It seemed the time had come for me to take my rightful place as the Queen of Withernsea.

  I yawned heartily. I could only pray I was up to the job, but right now I needed sleep like a vampire needed blood. As my mum whizzed me back home, I must have fallen asleep in her arms as the next thing I knew it was morning and I was back in my own bed. I stared at the Shawn Mendes posters on my wall, and looked around at all the other teenage paraphernalia, including clothes that were now too small for me strewn all over the bedroom furniture and the floor. Before queenly duties commenced I figured I needed to do a touch of clearing up.

  Shelley

  Late Saturday morning, it was all hands on deck at the coffee shop as the place was packed to the brim with the residents of Withernsea. There was myself, Theo, and Charlie; My mum Margret and my father Dylan; Frankie and Lucy; Ebony and Henry; Samara and her husband Johnny; Jax and Tristan; Polly and Drake; Duke Brishon; Rav; the new queen of the fairies, Ella; and one or two other supernaturals. Kai wasn’t here. Charlie told me that she’d asked him to stay away for his own safety. Debbie was here too. I knew she was trying to make an effort, but I could have done without having to explain everything to her every five seconds, especially about the fact her ‘grandaughter’ had grown again.

  We were just waiting for the new mum now although I’d called and told her I would understand if she didn’t show today. I figured she’d be exhausted after no doubt being up most of the night with the babies. But this was my best friend, and she was determined not to miss out on a thing.

  The door crashed open and what I think was my best friend half fell through it, staggering over to the nearest chair which happened to have Samara in it. She dragged Samara out of it using her wolf strength and when Samara began to protest, my bestie full on growled at her, making all heads that weren’t already turned in her direction swivel around in shock. She then dropped down on the chair, resting her arms on the table in front of her. Her head promptly fell forward atop her arms and there she stayed.

  Behind her followed Darius, with one baby in a papoose snuggled into his front. Alyssa followed, in full auntie duty, pushing a double buggy containing two more babies. Thankfully, all three babies seemed to be asleep… like their mother.

  Darius took one look at Kim and turning his gaze on me, shrugged his shoulders. “I told her to stay at home. She wouldn’t listen.”

  Everyone began cooing around the babies. Darius had his daughter in the papoose. She had almost died during her birth and had been saved by Polly with a healing power which had probably now transferred to the baby. Only time would tell, but the power was no longer with Polly.

  “So, what have you decided to call them?” Lucy asked Darius. “They’re Kim’s, so I went for Chardonnay, Merlot, and Zinfandel.”

  Frankie elbowed her muttering, “They don’t know about the sweepstakes.”

  “My daughter is called Louisa, which means ‘strong and valiant fighter’. My sons are Cedric, which means ‘warrior leader’ as he was born first; and Finian, which means ‘handsome warrior’. Finian is the baby with the mole on his right cheek.”

  I swear every woman in the coffee shop swooned at Darius’ announcement and the sweepstakes were instantly forgotten. My best friend’s hunky husband had stood tall and proud as he introduced his first cubs, and we’d all got a good view of arm-porn as he flexed his muscles indicating each newborn in turn.

  “Gorgeous names for gorgeous babies.” I told him. “Take a seat and I’ll get you a coffee. I’ll get your wife about four.” I turned to ask Alyssa if she wanted a drink, but she already held one in her hand, no doubt courtesy of Bartholomew-the barista she’d been out on a date with. I made sure Darius’ chair faced in the opposite direction so he didn’t tear Bartholomew limb from limb.

  When everyone had refreshments, I called for their attention. Everyone fell silent.

  “So thank you all for attending today at such short notice, especially given how busy we’ve all been lately. We are led to believe by certain events that war may indeed be coming to Withernsea imminently. Therefore, we all need to be extremely vigilant about any changes around us, any signs of evil etc. Firstly, we’re going to hear from Ebony, our Seer, about her visions. Over to you, Ebs.”

  Ebony rose and cleared her throat. It was at that point we all heard a large miaow at the door.

  I moved my gaze to see a black cat scratching at the door trying to get in.

  Kim raised her head, looked at the doorway and shouted, “Someone shoo that bloody thing away.” She then noticed the coffee in front of her and drank three down one after the other.

  Lucy got up and opened the door, letting the cat in. It dashed to the back of the room.

  “What are you doing? Ah!” Kim said as her eyes finally appeared to register the daylight and her brain woke up. “Maisie.”

  The next minute, the sexiest woman of Withernsea, AKA Maisie the werecat, swaggered over to the table and sat down. Seriously, we all would. There was a reason she’d been crowned Miss Werecat 2015. She had long dark hair, chocolate skin, deep dark eyes that held you in their depths, chiselled cheekbones, pouty lips, and an hourglass figure. But mess with Maisie and you knew about it. This kitten definitely had claws. Bartholomew’s tongue was hanging out and Alyssa’s jaw set tight before she stomped over to the tables to sit next to Charlie.

  “As you were.” Maisie said. “Sorry, I was late. There was something fishy outside.”

  “There you go, wife. Ask her what she saw.” Theo said. “My wife has just asked about any unusual activity in the area.”

  “I meant someone had left half of their cod in the bins near the chip shop.” Maisie told him.

  “Oh.” Theo shut up.

  I clapped my hands together. “Okay, as we were, people. Ebony. Over to you. Please tell everyone about your vision.”

  Ebony swallowed and took a deep breath. “I see fire, and I feel strong heat, like I am burning up. It comes with an overwhelming feeling of terror inside me.” Ebony clutched at her throat dramatically.

  “Sure, you’re not just trying to cook dinner again?” Kim quipped.

  I threw her a warning glare. “Is that all the information so far?” I double checked with Ebony.

  “Well… I see- I see- sausage rolls.”

  “Where?” Kim’s eyes shot towards the counter and she sat up extra straight. Her eyes were wide-the caffeine had kicked in. “I’m starving. Grab me three, Jax. One for each of the babies I’ve birthed.”

  Jax shook her head. “We don’t have sausage rolls today. Just doughnuts.”

  “Oh, I’ll have three of those then. Thanks, lovely.”

  Lucy scratched her head, looking around. “Where are you seeing sausage rolls, Ebony?”

  Ebony’s face took on a grey pallor. It al
ways freaked the living daylights out of me. She looked like the ‘bent neck lady’ from The House on Haunted Hill, albeit with her neck intact-for now-because I had a feeling if she shouted out about any more foodstuffs not available in the cafe, Kim would wring it.

  “The heat is intense.”

  “Does it come with a smell?” I asked her. “Burning?”

  “Just so very hot.” Ebony began opening her blouse, revealing a black lacy bra with nipple cut-outs. Looked like the honeymoon period was alive and well. Henry dived at her pulling her blouse back together. “Can’t breathe. It’s so hot.” Then as fast as she said that, she stood still, “sausage rolls. A plate of sausage rolls. War. It’s war.”

  The colour returned to her face and Ebony opened her eyes. She looked down to see her new husband holding her blouse together.

  “For heaven’s sake, Henry. At least wait until we get home.” She shook him off her and refastened her blouse, sitting down.

  “Okay, thank you, Ebony. Moving swiftly on, Frankie will now talk to us about what he has unearthed about the prophecy during his in-depth research over the last few months. You will remember that Frankie holds a database about all the supernaturals of Withernsea which is of great use to us all.”

  Frankie stood up. He looked like shit, with his hair all over the place and dark circles under his eyes. He and Theo should have been in bed now. Being up in the daylight hours went completely against their vampire body clocks and could make them feel quite poorly. But his help was needed today, so he’d stayed up.

  Frankie looked down at the small piece of paper in his hand. I’d been expecting him to be carrying a large folder. He’d obviously condensed his research down for us all. How thoughtful.

  “My research discovered the following: that a female child would be born and she would be the descendant of different supernatural creatures. Each generation would develop new powers through the pairing of different species. The father would be a vampire and her mother descended from wyverns. The child would be the strongest Withernsea had ever seen, would rule Withernsea and Wyvern Sea, and she would save us from war.”

  “And what about this war? What information do we have about that?” I asked him. “Who starts it? Supe or human? When does it begin?”

  Frankie looked at me blankly. “That’s it. That’s all there is.”

  I scrubbed a hand through my hair. “So, basically what we already know from Ebony’s visions?”

  Frankie nodded enthusiastically. “That is correct.”

  I had a pain in my eye and rubbed it. These people were taking years off my life. Then I remembered I was an undead vampire. It still took some getting used to.

  “So Charlie’s going to save us from a great war involving heat and sausage rolls? Better get yourself down to Gregg’s, Chaz, for when the last one comes out of the oven.” Kim rolled her eyes.

  “Kim!” Darius admonished.

  “Well, I got dressed for this! I could have stayed inside in my lovely warm house, sitting on my pile ring in my onesie while the triplets took it in turns to drink me dry. But instead I come here, where only Shelley is looking after me because I still haven’t been given any doughnuts.” She glared at Jax who scurried to put some on a plate.

  Darius stood up and in his deep growly voice he apologised for his wife’s behaviour. “If you could please wrap up some doughnuts for me to take away, Jax. I am sorry, my wife is suffering from sleep deprivation which is affecting her moods.”

  “Really? I couldn’t tell the difference from her usual demeanour.” Lucy quipped.

  “Your turn will come, bitch. See if you’re so funny when your vajayjay is on fire.”

  “Sweetie, I used to do that for fun down in hell. Fire play. Don’t knock it until you’ve tried it.” Lucy winked. “Actually everyone, don’t try it. There are special flames and protection in hell. Here you’d melt your genitals off and need the hospital.”

  I needed to call this meeting back to order. How we’d got from the war in Withernsea to a conversation about genitals so fast was beyond me.

  “Okay. Is there anything else before we call this meeting to a close?”

  “Yes.” Duke Brishon stood up. “We need to perform the ceremony for Princess Charlene post-haste. She needs to become Queen now she is an adult. So we need to de-crown you and coronate her. Can you make it Monday evening, say 8pm?”

  “Yes. Thank you, Duke Brishon. Indeed, the quicker Charlene is made Queen, the better.” That was mainly because then they’d stop throwing dirty sea-water at me.

  We closed the meeting and everyone made their way out, including Polly and Drake who had gathered their belongings and were moving into his house under the water. Finally, we seemed to be getting our home back to ourselves.

  I remained in the coffee shop with Charlie. I wanted to have a chat with my daughter about the future.

  “Off you go to bed, Theo. I’ll see you tonight.” I told him. “And straight to bed. No more looking up waterproof chastity belts.”

  A certain vampire was still struggling to process the fact his daughter was growing up fast. Well, I guess she had only been born in February…

  Charlie

  Oh God. Now my mother wanted to have a word with me. I hope it didn’t involve a sex talk. How embarrassing was this going to be? My schedule was already a bit full on. Let me see. I counted on my fingers.

  1. Get used to being in my twenties.

  2. Reassure Alyssa that we were still friends, seeing as I was now a lot older than her.

  3. Chat to Alyssa about Bartholomew - who was also a lot older than her.

  4. Become Queen of Wyvern Sea.

  5. Look out for impending war with special attention to any fire, heat, and sausage rolls!!!!

  6. Try to get past my dad to see Kai, my hunky merman.

  7. Throw off the last traces of being fifteen which kept tripping my system, ie wanting to stomp about in protest at my dad’s behaviour and call him lame.

  But one thing at a time and that was catch up time with my mum, who I had to say was really looking in need of a coffee right now.

  “What are you counting? Is it days to the war? Do you know something?” She ranted, her face creased in concern.

  “Just how many things are on my ‘to-do’ list. I’ll get us both a fresh coffee, Mum. Take five.”

  Alyssa was hanging around the counter throwing shade at Maisie who hadn’t left yet. I watched as Maisie stalked up to the front of the shop. She stood next to Alyssa and leaned in. I dashed over ready to protect my friend if need be, only to hear Maisie say:

  “Baby girl, I don’t want your man. He’s a weak human. Anyway, out of the two of you, you’re far more attractive. Shame I’m a cat, and you’re a dog. Not a good mix.” She wrinkled her nose.

  Alyssa’s face contorted. “I am not a dog. I am a wolf.”

  Maisie laughed and headed to the door. “You lot are so easy to wind up. You need to not give a shit. Be more cat. Ciao, miaow.” With that she left.

  I ordered my drinks from Bartholomew.

  “Are you around later?” I asked my best friend.

  Alyssa’s lips drooped. “Look at you, Charlie. You’re gorgeous; all grown up and the Queen-to-be. Let’s face it, you don’t need me anymore.”

  Sighing, I rolled my eyes at her. “That’s not true, but right now I have to chat with my mother. We need a catch up later. By the way, you’re being too clingy around Sir Loins. It’s true that sometimes you have to treat em mean to keep em keen.”

  She quirked a brow. “Are you going to be mean to Kai when you see him?”

  My heart stuttered for a moment and my stomach flipped. “Shit, I can’t even think about that right now. I’m so nervous. Anyway, talk later. Get out of here, Lys.” I took my phone out of my pocket and sent her a text.

  Alyssa took hers out of her pocket and read it.

  Charlie: Pretend you got a text from a guy from the pack.

  “Oh, Dermot back at Hogs, wants t
o see me about some pack stuff. That’ll be a hardship given he’s fucking hot.”

  I elbowed her. “Ooooh, try to take a pic.”

  Bartholomew came over to the counter with my drinks. “Dermot, you say? Oh, I was just going to see if you wanted to hang around the coffee shop with me, Alyssa. It’s almost my lunch break.”

  Alyssa looked at me. I texted her again.

  Charlie: NO!!! It’s working. Go!!!

  Alyssa shrugged her shoulders. “Another time maybe, hun. Although it’s a bit lame me hanging around here anyway.” She turned to me. “Bye, babes. I’ll let you know if I’m free later, or if Dermot’s keeping me busy.” She gave me a wink and left the coffee shop looking a lot happier than before.

  I smiled at Bartholomew, who struggled to smile back, thanked him for the drinks and headed back towards my mum.

  “Thanks, love. I’m most definitely ready for this drink after this morning. It was all rather a waste of time in the end. We’re no further forward, are we?”

  “I guess not, but you know, Mum, if there’s one thing my super-speedy aging has taught me, it's that life is for living. I have no real idea of how long I’m going to be around. I have a feeling that my vamp genes will kick in and I’ll stay this kind of age for a while, but what if I don’t? What if in a week's time, I’m like a hundred?”

  My mum bit her lip. “Aww, Mum. Don’t get sad. I know this must be weird, but I’m a prophecy, here to save Withernsea. Maybe that’s my entire purpose?”

  My mum shook her head. “I can’t believe that, Charlie. I won’t believe that.”

  She leaned back in her seat and let out a huge sigh. “Do you know what? It’s not even a year yet since I met your father. This time last year, I thought I was human. When I think about everything that has happened from then until now my mind is blown. I hope the war really is some nonsense about the last sausage roll in Greggs so that we can just get on with our lives and relax for a little while. Maybe I could spend some time shopping with my beautiful daughter rather than having to discuss saving the world.”