by Ella Col
I think Jamie just implied that Hannah was using me. Impossible. I was using her. Was I? “I used her.”
“No. Hannah used the fine art of cuntery to trick you into thinking that you were using her. You were duped. Unless, maybe…” she taps her chin. “You were turned on by her head games.”
I run my free hand through my hair. How do I explain to a girl that I’m attracted to that I was a stupid, goddamn kid who got caught up in Hannah’s world and didn’t know how to get out.
“It’s complicated, Jamie.” I sigh. “I was sixteen years old when Hannah and I started fucking each other. I was a goddamn kid. But I’m not a kid anymore. And Hannah doesn’t have any control over me anymore.”
Jamie sulks into her seat. “Good.”
She’s quiet for the remainder of the drive to her apartment. The silence allows me to think. There is no mistake. There is no love lost between Jamie and Hannah. If I didn’t know better, I would say something went down between the two cousins. The venom Jamie has for Hannah is serious and deadly.
I pull my car to the curb and wait. For what? I have no fucking clue.
“This is my humble abode.” Jamie points to a grey, cobblestone building.
Jamie lives in the heart of the town, which is the shittiest part. It makes me sad to think that she lives here by herself. Or does she? I haven’t even had the opportunity to ask her.
“It’s nice.” She knows I’m lying, but it’s the best I can say right now.
“It’s not, really.” She smiles at me. “It’s what I can afford.”
“Your parents don’t help you?” It’s a stupid question. If they did, she wouldn’t be living here.
“I don’t want their help. I’m fine on my own.” There’s a hint of regret in her voice.
“I get that.” I can sympathize. “I’m moving next week. I’ll be only a couple blocks from you. We’re going to be neighbors.”
“Your parents don’t help you?” Jamie poses the same question to me.
“My dad doesn’t like what I do for a living. And I’m not quitting what I love to do. I need to be on my own for a while.” There is a sense of freedom from saying it aloud.
Jamie yawns, signaling that she’s tired and it’s time to end the night. I don’t want her to get out of my car. I want to know more about her, and I don’t know why.
“Thank you for taking me home.” Jamie slips off my shirt and hands it to me.
I realize two things. Jamie’s body is un-fucking-believable. And two, she has to walk into her shit hole of a building half naked. No fucking way.
I shove my shirt back to her. She looks surprised. I shut off my engine. Then I glare at her, starting from the base of her toes slowly appreciating every curve to the top of pretty little head. “Keep the shirt, babe.” I open my car door. Before I get out I peek over my shoulder. “I’m walking you to your door.”
***
As we burst through Jamie’s front door, we barely can contain our laughter. It was the most entertaining three flights of stairs I’ve ever had to endure.
“I don’t think I’ve ever heard that many whistles before.” Jamie laughs.
Lucky for me, most of the perverts in the stairwell were women. Granted, most of the women lacked good hygiene and teeth, but they wanted me, not Jamie. Jamie found the sexual harassment toward me highly entertaining. I did, too, except some of the women took it to a whole different level by being really explicit and flashing their tits at me. I’ve never seen so many sad looking boobs before in my life.
“I feel violated,” I joke.
“You poor thing.” Jamie laughs louder. Throwing her keys on table in the entranceway, she looks back at me. “Do you want a drink?”
“No, I’m good.”
Jamie’s apartment is small but tidy. Overall, it’s a nice apartment. It looks like Jamie “up cycled” a lot of her furniture. Most of it is painted black and decorated with throw pillows and patchwork blankets.
Jamie catches me looking around. “I’m a do-it-yourselfer. I love to paint furniture and make things. I’m a confessed pinter-holic.”
“Pinter-holic?”
Jamie pulls a hoodie from a coat stand and slips it on. “I have an addiction to Pinterest.”
“Oh.” Should I even know what that is? “I like your place. It’s nice.”
Jamie likes that I’ve noticed the little things that make Jamie’s apartment hers. “I can always help you with your apartment. I love decorating.”
“All I need is a bed, a television, and a man chair.” I don’t plan on doing much decorating.
“You need help.” Jamie doesn’t like my decorating logic.
“You’re probably right. I don’t know the first thing about living on my own,” I admit. Plus, I won’t turn away the help offered from a pretty girl.
She plops down on the futon and puts her legs to the side. “Sit down.”
I’m basically fine with women and have no problem speaking with them – until I met Jamie. For some reason I feel frozen. I’m too nervous to talk to her. I feel like I will run out of things to say to her, or I will make a total fool of myself every time I open my mouth.
‘Let’s fuck’ always works with regular girls, believe it or not. I don’t think that will work with Jamie.
“Do you feel like hanging out for a little bit?” Jamie asks.
“I’m in no rush to get back to my women in the stairwell,” I tease.
Jamie chuckles. “I’m surprised they aren’t banging down the door to get to your smoking body.”
Hmm. “So, you think my body is smoking?”
Jamie tucks her hair behind her ear. “You know that your body is hot. Don’t play dumb with me.”
She’s attracted to me. That’s a plus. She thinks I’m playing dumb. That’s a minus. “I’m as nervous as a whore in church.” Yeah, I said that.
Jamie’s long strands fall over breasts. She peers up to me with the big green eyes that have done nothing but entice the living fuck out of me. She tucks the same damn piece of hair that fell before behind her ear again. “I make you nervous?”
Yeah. Fuck me.
“Yup.”
“I like that…me making you nervous.”
“I don’t know how I feel about it yet.” I move closer to her.
She inches a little closer to me. My hand reaches out to caress the side of her face. Without thinking, I draw her face to mine and stop within inches of her lips. I feel her sweet, moist breath on my face.
Do I want to break my rule? I don’t kiss girls on the mouth. Ever. But I really want to kiss Jamie. Bad.
Fuck it.
I cup Jamie’s face in my hands. The air hisses between her teeth. I lean in and take her bottom lip into my mouth and suck. My hand slips behind her head dragging her mouth closer to mine. Within seconds, I’m devouring her entire mouth. My tongue is caressing every part of her mouth. Pulling away, I nip at her lips and allow her to suck at mine. Moving our mouths over and over again is driving me mad. So good…so fucking good.
Jamie whines into to my mouth, giving me one last suck before pulling away. Don’t.
Bringing her fingers to my lips, she rubs her thumb across my bottom lip. “Wow.”
“Yeah,” I whisper. More like fuck yeah.
Her fingers leave my lips and travel to the stubble on the side of my face. Leaning in again, she kisses my lips. She doesn’t use any tongue, but it is the most sensual kiss I have ever had.
I. Want. More.
Grabbing her face I pull her into me thrusting my tongue into her mouth. The kiss is wet, wild, and needy. Jamie climbs onto my lap allowing me to push her down on my rock hard cock. Oh fuck.
Naturally, her hips start to gyrate against my dick, wanting and seeking her own gratification. Both of us begin to pant and grab at each other in the most frantic of ways. My hand slips under the hoodie and desperately seeks the pillowy breast that taunted me only hours earlier. My hand finds it and latches on to it kneading an
d caressing it.
“Nash,” she whispers.
Why does it sound so fucking good to hear my name come from this girl’s mouth?
Things are spiraling out of control. Fast. Don’t get me wrong, I want this. I want to shove myself so far into Jamie that she can’t ever think of anyone ever again but me. And if this were any other girl, I’d do it. Fuck, I’d do it all night long.
I put my hands on her shoulders and pull my mouth away from hers. “Jamie, I have to stop.”
“Did I do something wrong?” Suddenly, Jamie seems bashful.
Wrong? No way.
“No, baby.” I try to catch my breath. “You’re doing all the right things.”
“Then?” Jamie arcs her eyebrow.
“I want to fuck you. Hard. And if we don’t stop, you’re going to end up on your back with me inside of you.” Yeah, I said it. There is no need to lie.
“And you don’t think I want to fuck you?”
What the?
“Do you?”
“Yeah.”
Holy fuck.
What the hell am I waiting for? Jamie gave me the go ahead. Instead of jumping her bones, I’m sitting here mentally torturing myself.
“I want you to help me move into my apartment next week.” That came out all wrong.
“You think if I fuck you, then I won’t help you?” She laughs at me.
“It’s not what I meant. If we fuck tonight, things might be awkward. I want to keep seeing you.” That’s new.
“Oh.”
“Don’t sound so excited.” Jamie’s reaction surprises me.
“I just got the impression that you don’t date.”
“I don’t.” It’s true. I don’t think I’ve ever been on a date. Ever. My relationship with Hannah was a secret. We never went anywhere but each other’s bedrooms. And all of the other broads were play friends.
Jamie is still straddled around my waist. Her breasts are still eye level. I don’t realize it, but I’m kneading the sides of her bare flesh on her waist.
Jamie is beautiful in so many ways. She’s stunningly gorgeous, talented, witty as all hell, and smart. In other words, she’s everything I’m not used to. She’s someone I’d like to get to know better. There’s substance to her.
“How do you suppose we do this if you don’t date?”
Good question.
“I guess I’m going to have to change the way I do things.” I gaze at her, drinking her in.
“I guess so.” Jamie gives me a quick peck on my lips.
“So, do you want to see me again?” I suck at this.
“Are you asking me out?” Jamie smiles.
“Yeah, I am. And, clearly, I’m downright horrible at this. So, instead of making me suffer through this…do you think you might want to go out with me sometime?” I think I’ve started to sweat.
She ponders the thought for a moment. “What about Hannah?”
“What about her?
“Is it over? Or do you plan on getting it on with her while she’s married, too?”
Damn.
“It’s over.” The subject of Hannah is a little awkward.
“Then I accept your invitation. Where are you taking me?”
“To my apartment. I’m going to make you dinner.” I am?
“Awesome for me.”
I lean in giving her a quick kiss. I want so much more. But I don’t take it, not tonight, at least.
“I gotta go. My fans are waiting for me in the stairwell,” I tease her. What I really want to say is that if I don’t go, I might not have the fight in me to stop myself from fucking you senseless. I keep that thought to myself.
“Don’t keep them waiting.” Jamie laughs.
Slowly, Jamie rolls from my lap. My hard-on is practically breaking through my pants. It doesn’t go unnoticed. I see Jamie’s eyes look down and then quickly look away.
Quickly, I stand up hoping to adjust myself as I get to the door. “I’m really glad I went to the party tonight. At least one good thing came out of it.”
“Me, too.”
“I’ll pick you up on Saturday.”
“See you then.”
Chapter Fifteen
Caydon and Shorty plop down on the last piece of furniture they helped me move into my new piece of shit. The sweat pours from us as we gulp down our beers.
“Thanks for helping out, guys.”
“What’s the rush?” Caydon asks. “Your dad wasn’t kicking your ass out or anything. Why did we have to get everything moved in today?”
“I have a date tomorrow night,” I blurt out. Shit.
“A fucking date?” Shorty bellows. “As in dinner and a movie type shit? I never thought I’d see the day, Nash.”
“How the hell did that happen?” Caydon laughs. “Someone actually wants to go out with you after you ask them if they want to fuck? How fucking romantic.”
Okay, my flare for picking up girls lacks finesse. In my defense, it has worked for me over and over again. I’ve never had a girl turn me down for a quick lay.
Jamie is different. She’s street smart and quick-witted. I’ve never met a girl who’s so damn comfortable in her own skin. I’d be lying if I said that I didn’t want to bang her the first night I met her. But if I had, I would have never seen her again.
I completely understand and agree with the notion that women want sexual pleasure just as much as men, and I am aware that “giving it up” on the first date is not always giving it up so much as it is “getting it.” However, I don’t know the etiquette for a first date since I’ve never had a first date.
“Fuck you both.” I pull the lever on my ‘man’ chair and my feet fly up into a comfortable position. “I can be romantic.”
Caydon smirks. “No offense, but I’ve seen your caveman antics at parties. Good luck tomorrow night.”
Fuck. He’s right. I don’t know the first thing about dating. “Any words of wisdom boys?”
I figure I might as well ask. Both Caydon and Shorty are in committed relationships with really great women. They must know something that I don’t.
“Yeah, don’t fuck her on the first date.” Shorty is the first to offer advice. “Even if she says she wants to.”
“Why not?” Okay, here is the reality: some guys are looking to get laid as soon as possible as are some girls. I need an explanation.
“If you fuck after the first or second date then we, meaning us guys, may get the message that this was a one-night stand, and split. Obviously, you like her enough to invite her where you live.” Shorty is basking in my ignorance. “Therefore, you need to give her incentive to come back for more. Plus, if she sees your small dick, she won’t ever come back.”
Caydon almost spits his beer out. I throw a couch pillow at Shorty. He chuckles at my sad attempt to hit him.
“Fuck you, asshole. My dick is way bigger than yours.” The small dick joke finally registers.
Shorty grabs his crotch. “Wanna see it?” He blows me a kiss.
I throw my face into my hands. I feel something I have never felt before when it comes to women. Fear. I’m nervous as hell. Jesus Christ. What am I going to do?
“I’m canceling. I can’t fucking do this.”
“Is that what you do when you are in the ring? You quit?” Shorty wears a grin on his face.
“No. It’s the only place I can’t quit,” I admit.
“Then, why quit now. Obviously, you had no fear when you asked her. You’re letting your nerves get to you.” Caydon puts his feet up on my coffee table. I push them off and shake my head. Animal.
“Prepare to show her what a stud you are. Forget flowers and all that crap. Just unzip, whip it out, and twirl it. Give her a piece of the big, white snake. Maybe afterwards, she’ll buy you dinner at Applebee’s or somewhere.” Shorty just won’t let up.
My friends are douchebags. “Both of you are with the two hottest chicks on the face of the earth, and this is the best you can do for me? How the fuck do Reece a
nd Maria even stand you guys?”
Tweedle Dee looks at Tweedle Dum. Apparently, they don’t know how the hell they landed their girlfriends. I’m starting to think it was just luck.
“I admit…Reece is too good for me.” Caydon means it. He loves that girl. I want that.
“Invite us to dinner.” Shorty is foolish to think that I would even consider it. “We’ll be the buffers. Ya know? We’ll keep the conversation flowing.”
“It’s not a bad idea.” Caydon is brainwashed into thinking that he is helping.
“Y’all are insane. Why the hell would I do that?” I laugh it off.
“For one…you can’t cook.” Caydon downs his fourth beer. I think he’s buzzed.
True. I don’t. “Good point. Keep going,” I encourage Caydon to give me details.
“I think I can persuade my beautiful girlfriend into cooking dinner for us. Maria will help, of course,” Caydon volunteers Reece’s services and looks to Shorty for approval.
These drunken dickheads have no idea that they just made a huge mistake. I haven’t had my first date, but even I know never to volunteer a woman to cook or clean for you. Assholes.
“Yeah, you might want to ask her first before you assume she’ll do it.” I try to help the poor sucker out. Yet, he insists on digging the hole deeper.
“I’m texting her right now. She’ll do it.” Caydon sends Reece a drunken text. Beer balls make you do really stupid things.
About a half hour later, Reece is at my front door with her hands on her hips and a scowl to match. “Where is he?”
I’m petrified for Caydon and for myself. “I swear to you, Reece, I had nothing to do with this.”
“You supplied the beer. He’s drunk.” She puts her hand up signaling that speaking is not an option for me.
Alcohol is a sore spot for Reece since her mom died. Ever since that night that Caydon got super drunk, she makes sure he stays in line. And he does. Today, it was all about fun, and he got carried away. If she would allow me to speak, I could explain.
Instead, I lead her to her boyfriend, who is playing PlayStation and finishing off another beer. Caydon is silly and harmless. This isn’t going to be a lifelong habit. I know her concern. “Reece,” I whisper. “I know you’re scared. I stayed sober to keep an eye out on them. It’s okay.”
