by Audrey Harte
“I meant every word, and I appreciate your trust. Please don’t think I’m some kind of prick and take that for granted. I know it isn’t easy having me gone so often.”
“It’s torture, baby.”
Casey smiled, chuckling at the pained expression on Annie’s face. He leaned down and kissed her lightly on the nose. “I’m sorry. It won’t be like that forever.”
“Is this the last tour you’re going on?”
“Well, no. I hope not anyway.”
“Then how many more years will it be like this?”
Sighing, Casey rubbed his face. “Babe, I don’t know. And we don’t know what your future holds, either. What if you win this thing and are doing shows in Vegas?”
“Well at least I would be in one place and not traveling around everywhere.” Annie bit her lip and looked up at him. “We haven’t really talked about this, you know—what’s going to happen if either of this wins the competition and has to move to Vegas.”
“I know.”
“Would… would you consider moving to Vegas if I won?”
“Of course I would. I don’t know if I could make it happen like right away, but I’m definitely open to it. What about you?”
“Yeah, as long as I can find a job here, I would totally move here for you.”
Casey pulled her into his arms and hugged her, kissing the top of her head. “Okay then, that’s settled then. You forgive me for overreacting?”
“Mmmhmm,” Annie agreed. “Forgive me for being an idiot and trusting Trey to just have a friendly dinner with me?”
A low growl escaped him first, but he agreed to forgive her as well. “No more dinners with Trey.” Then he added on a please.
“No more anything with Trey, hon. Trust me. I don’t want anything to do with someone like that. I gave him a fair chance, just as I try to give most people. He crossed the line.”
“Alright, let’s not talk about that asshole anymore. We’ve given him enough of our time.”
“I agree. Anyways, congrats on making it through to the next round! I’m so proud of you!”
“And you, princess. Can you believe we’re finally here? We’re going to be on TV now. Are you ready for this?”
“More than ready. Being here has been the best thing to ever happen to me… besides meeting you, of course,” she said teasingly.
“I hope you always feel that way,” he said as he leaned down to kiss her. “I hate to kiss and run, but I have to meet the guys and start planning our next performance.”
“Yeah, I saw that they are offering a vocal coach and pianist for the singers if we want to practice beforehand. I’m going to find Erin and book our coach so we can start practicing.”
“Know what you’re going to sing, yet?”
“Yeah, I’m pretty sure I’m going to do the song I’ve been practicing with my voice coach, Impossible by Shontelle.”
“Nice. Well, I know you’ll kill it. You want to meet up later and go shopping? If I know you, you’re going to want something new to wear for your first TV appearance.”
“You know me well.” Annie raised up on her tiptoes and kissed him again. “I’m glad we made up. I hate having you angry with me.”
“Same here. Call me later.”
“Okay.”
Casey hugged her tight before turning to walk out of the lobby area. She watched him leave, then sighed and pulled out her phone to text Erin. She felt better now, but she couldn’t push aside the nagging feeling that told her things weren’t quite resolved, yet. If one of them won this competition, they would have to face the reality that one of them would be the loser. Losing to the other and then having to uproot their life anyway to accommodate the other person might prove to be challenging. It was easier said than done, and Annie wasn’t sure that Casey would still feel the same way after being faced with the reality of having lost to her. She wanted to believe that he was a bigger person than to resent her for beating him, but in the end he was a man. And from her experience, men never enjoyed losing. But then again, neither did she.
After a week of rehearsals, Annie finally felt prepared for her first live recorded show. She’d spent almost every waking moment practicing, whether she was with her vocal coach, alone or with Erin. Practicing with her new best friend was helpful to them both in learning to overcome their stage fright, although they were now sick of hearing each other’s songs as well as their own over and over again.
When it was time for her to perform, Annie knew she had to remember that feeling you get when you sing a song for someone who is hearing it for the first time. It was time to lay it all on the line. She couldn’t afford to hold anything back. If she didn’t give it her all, she might as well pack her bags now.
Things with Casey were better, although a little strained. Both of them were working hard to prepare for the next show. This would be the first time the audience would be voting, so this performance was the most critical. He’d been sleeping in the room he shared with Chris instead of in hers. It just made sense for both of them. He was rehearsing with his crew into the wee hours of the night. She rehearsed long hours as well, but she still went to bed much earlier than him. He didn’t want to disturb her, and they both wanted to focus, so they reluctantly agreed to sleep apart for the remainder of the competition.
Now it was Tuesday night with only a few moments left until the taping was scheduled to start, and Annie felt like she was about to lose the little lunch she’d been able to force down. As she paced nervously in the green room, Erin snapped at her.
“Annie, stop. You’re making me nervous. Sit down for a minute and relax.”
“I can’t. I can’t sit. I can’t relax. I think I’m gonna puke.”
“Do not puke. That’s an order, lady.”
“Okay.” Annie swallowed the bile that was rising in her throat and forced herself to smile widely at Erin. “I’m good. I’m good.”
“Uh huh. Not buying it,” Erin retorted. “You need to breathe. Like seriously. I think you may be turning purple.”
“Shut up. And I am breathing.”
“Breathe more.”
“You’re making it worse.”
“Shut up, sit down, and breathe, bitch.”
Glaring at Erin for a moment, Annie sniffed before gingerly sitting down on the edge of the same sofa where her bossy friend was sitting. She took an exaggerated big breath, then exhaled again, then repeated the action twice more. To her chagrin, she was already starting to feel better. Not only did the breathing help, but Erin had distracted her by making her angry, therefore effectively making her less nervous of her impending first performance in a front of a live studio audience.
“See? Isn’t that better?”
Annie stuck her tongue out at Erin, who just smirked back at her. “Shut up.”
“Oh, I think you’re up, sweetie. The stage manager is waving you over.”
“Fuck me.” The room swayed slightly as Annie got to her feet.
“Tempting, but I prefer men,” Erin said dryly, then stood to give Annie a quick hug. “Knock ‘em dead, lady.”
“Thanks! See you on the other side. Break a leg!” Annie hugged Erin back and took another deep breath as she turned to walk to the stage manager. He led her backstage and showed her where to wait until she received her cue to enter from stage left. When he left her standing there alone, Annie almost had another panic attack, but she forced herself to stop and take slow, deep breaths, and she closed her eyes for a moment to help herself calm down.
You can do this. You can do this. You can do this.
Opening her eyes again, she took a swig from the bottle of water she’d brought with her. She bounced on her toes and stretched each arm over her head, took another sip, then handed the bottle to the assistant stage manager who had just walked up and offered to take it from her. In another minute, the stage manager gave her the cue to enter stage left. Feeling the sweat already beading on her forehead, she brushed it off with a finger and plastere
d a big smile on her face before she started moving forward and out onto the stage.
This was it. This was her moment to shine. This was her moment to make it or break it. If she fucked this up, it was over. She knew it in her bones. So she was going to give it everything she had. When she thought she had nothing left to give, she was going to reach as deep inside herself as she needed to pull out an emotional and memorable performance.
Using the dim stage lights provided, she made her way to the center of the stage and stopped in front of a microphone stand that had been set up for her. In another few moments, the music to Impossible started, and Annie counted off the beats in her head as the stage lights began to brighten. Then it was time for her to sing, and that’s exactly what she was did. She sang her little heart out. She owned the stage and sang like every single person in the audience might be hearing the song for the very first time. It was her moment to shine, and shine she did, like a brilliant star in the night sky. She was in the moment, and the moment was nothing like she had ever felt before. She could feel every heartbeat pulsing through her veins as her voice soared throughout the auditorium. She wished it was possible to capture the feeling in a bottle and keep it forever, so she could always remember.
As she sang the last note, the music ended at the same time, and the audience broke into loud applause. All three of the celebrity judges gave her a standing ovation, and the crowd even started chanting her name. Her jaw went slack as she stood there in shock, but quickly the smile returned to her face as she shakily raising her hand to wave at the audience. Kyle Atkinson, the show’s host, joined her and gently took her by the elbow, leading her to their mark.
As they had rehearsed before the show, Kyle asked what she’d been doing with her life before she auditioned for The Next American Superstar, and she answered that she’d been working an administrative position for a law firm. Then he asked her how she felt about the first week of final auditions and her first live recorded performance. She briefly described what it felt like when she got to New York and said she was thrilled with her latest performance and hoped they all enjoyed it, too. Kyle wrapped things up by telling the audience that if they loved Annie’s performance, they needed to call or text to vote for her starting at the end of the show.
The next thing she knew, she was existing stage right and following the stage manager back to a secondary green room for the performers who’d already finished. Casey was sitting there when she opened the door to the room, but he popped up and moved quickly to sweep her up in a hug as soon as he saw her enter the room.
“That was so good, princess,” he gushed as he kissed her soundly. “I’m so proud of you!”
“Thank you! I thought I did pretty good, too, and oh my God, did it feel incredible. The rush was like nothing I had ever experienced before. I just want to do it again and again and again. I’d go back out there right now if I could and just keep singing forever.”
“That’s because that’s where you were born to be. On the stage.”
“Seems like it,” she agreed happily. “How’d your performance go?”
“It went better than I expected. I knew we had it down, and I wasn’t really worried about us nailing it, but it still felt great to know we did it even cleaner and more precise than I could have hoped for.”
“Yay, I’m so glad to hear that, babe. You know, in spite of all the craziness that’s happened to us since we’ve been here, I’m still happy I got to experience all of this with you.” Annie tilted her head back and kissed him soundly.
“Likewise. You ready to go celebrate?”
“Totally. What do you have in mind?”
“The guys want to hit up this bar called Halo. You up for it?”
“Of course. Is it okay if I invite Erin?”
“Sure. Maybe you can find her another guy to take her mind off of that other dude.”
Annie nodded. “I know—that’s what I am hoping for. She’s such a sweet girl. She deserves a nice guy who is going to appreciate everything she has to offer. She doesn’t need that jerkface.”
“Hey, Annie. Great job out there! You’ve got quite a set of pipes on you,” Chris said as he came up to them, giving Annie a hug and kiss on the cheek.
“Aw, thanks, Chris. I heard that you guys knocked it out of the park again. Congratulations!”
“Yeah, tonight was dope. Our shit was so tight! Like we are always on our game, but tonight, everything just flowed so perfectly, it was like we were all the same person.”
“Pure Flow,” Annie said emphatically, making Casey and Chris both smile and nod.
“You know it, girl,” Chris said with a wink. “You coming with us to Halo?”
“Definitely, and I’m going to see if Erin want to comes with us, too.”
“Rock on. More the merrier. You guys down for shots of Fireball?”
“What’s Fireball?” Annie asked with a raised eyebrow. “It sounds dangerous.”
Chris shook his head and laughed. “Nah, it’s whisky, but it tastes just like a red hot—you know, the cinnamon candy.”
Annie looked at him skeptically. “I’m so not a whisky girl.”
“You don’t have to be with this, I swear. It goes down real smooth. Do you like cinnamon?”
“Yeah.”
“Just trust me then. You have to try it.”
“It’s good, babe. I’ve had it before. Just don’t mix it with wine, and if you’re going to mix it with beer, I’d do it with a Stella Cidre.”
“Okay, okay. Enough with the peer pressure already. I’ll try it.”
Chris and Casey both hooted their approval, and Chris even did a little fist pump for her. “Yeah, that’s what I’m talkin’ about. Fireball shots all around!”
Once all of the contestants that had been slated for the first night finished their performances, they were finally released for the evening. Annie went up to her room to shower and freshen up. Casey told her to go ahead and eat something light so she wouldn’t be drinking on an empty stomach, so she ordered a Caesar salad from room service and picked over it as she got ready to leave.
They all decided to take an Uber SUV to the bar, and when they arrived, Halo was already packed. Once they got inside, Casey grabbed Annie’s hand and started leading her through the crowd. She reached back for Erin’s hand and held on tight, pulling her friend along through the crowd until they reached the bar. They waited a minute for the other dancers to join them, then Chris started ordering a round of Fireball shots for everyone.
Once everyone had their shot in hand, Casey proposed a toast first to Pure Flow, then to Annie, and then to Erin, for doing what they’d set out to do, giving their all and leaving it on the stage. They all cheered and then threw back their shot glasses in unison.
“Woo!” Annie exclaimed as she slammed her shot glass back down.
“Yeah? You like that?” Chris teased as he grinned at her.
“Yeah, not bad. You’re right. It tastes just like a red hot.”
“Told ya! You ready for another?”
Annie glanced at Casey who just smiled back at her, so she turned back to Chris and nodded. “Bring it on!”
As they waited for the bartender to pour their next round, Annie congratulated some of the other crew members on their performance. The bartender asked what she was congratulating them for, so she explained about the talent competition they were all part of.
“Oh, that’s fuckin’ awesome. Congrats to all of you! Tell you what. This round’s on me.”
“No way! Seriously?” Chris exclaimed in surprise.
“Are you sure that’s okay? Do you need to clear it with your boss first or anything? We don’t want to get you into trouble,” Annie protested. “Hi, I’m Annie, by the way, and this is my boyfriend, Casey. His dance crew is competing as well as myself and Erin, but Erin and I are both solo artists.”
“Nice to meet you all. I’m Avery, and I co-own this bar. So yeah, no sweat, guys. This round’s on the house. Just tell a
ll your friends to check out our bar sometime while they’re in town for the show.”
“Oh for sure,” Annie agreed. “I’m not even a huge fan of bars, but I really love this place. Cool name, too!”
“Thanks, glad you like it. Well, let me know if I can get you anything else.”
“Um yeah, we’ll do this one, and then one more round.”
“You got it, princess,” Avery said with another wink, then started pouring out another round for them.
Annie giggled as Casey frowned at their bartender, who was already busy passing out the next round to everyone. Elbowing him, she teased, “Don’t be jelly because another guy used your nickname for me.”
“It’s my nickname for you, princess. That’s the whole point,” he growled into her ear, making her giggle.
“The man gave us free Fireball, sir. He can call me whatever he wants,” she said with a teasing smile.
“Is that all it takes?” he asked, smirking at her. “What will you do for me if I buy you a shot of Fireball?”
“Why don’t you buy me one and find out?” she suggested as she looked up at him, fluttering her eyelashes provocatively.
Casey immediately turned to flag Avery down, ordering double shots of Fireball for both Annie and himself. She laughed when he handed a glass to her, then clinked it against his and made the motion for “bottoms up” with her free hand. Taking a quick deep breath, she threw back the double shot, then gave a quick shake of her head.
“Whew, baby! Yeah!” she exclaimed, slapping the counter twice with the palm of her hand. “Okay. Bar dancing time!”
Before she could rethink her own actions, Annie hoisted herself up onto the bar and carefully stood as one of her favorite drinking songs, Get Low by Lil Jon and the East Side Boyz, began to play. When she glanced down at Casey’s face, she couldn’t help laughing. He looked shocked that she was up dancing on the bar.
Cupping her hands, she yelled for Erin, finally getting her friend’s attention after repeatedly yelling her name a few times. When Erin looked up, her eyes widening, Annie motioned for her to join her on the bar. At first Erin shook her head vehemently and mouthed, “No fucking way,” to Annie, but Casey helpfully pushed another double shot of Fireball into her hand. Erin gave him a withering look, then shrugged and rolled her eyes before taking the shot glass from him and tossing it back. In another minute, she was climbing onto the bar herself.
