by Stacy Borel
“Well, I’ve only really heard about it. Macie had a membership there not too long ago. She was trying to get the attention of a guy who was going there, but it ended up not working out. Anyway she cancelled it because she didn’t want to run into him again and the girl doesn’t need to exercise. Her body is already pretty perfect.”
He curled his lip as though something I said left a bad taste in his mouth. “First of all, going to a gym to get a guy’s attention is just stupid. And second, I don’t care what you look like, everyone should work out.”
I shifted in my chair. This topic felt more taboo than telling him all the ins and outs of my mom’s sorted affairs. I was already insecure with myself, but when you couple that with the Adonis standing across from me and eyeing me like he meant that comment for me, I bristled.
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
He took a step forward, as though he knew I’d spar with him over the subject. “Exactly what I said, you can be skinny, tall, short, healthy, out of shape, or fat; everyone should be working out.”
Was it me, or did my ears pick up on his emphasis on the word ‘fat’? I knew I was probably overreacting, but suddenly I wanted this fight. “Why does it sound like your words are a jab in my direction, Camden?”
He jerked back slightly. “What? I was making a general statement. What are you being so sensitive about?”
I rolled my eyes and hopped down from the stool. Rounding the counter I tossed the rest of my coffee in the sink. “Oh give me a break! I heard you the day I signed those papers, and I’ve seen the way you look at me. I get it okay? I know I’m not thin, and I don’t have the best diet. But who in the hell are you to judge me for how I live my life? If I wanted to put my fat ass in a gym, I’d be squatting with the rest of those skinny girls you bring home.”
I hadn’t realized that I had moved to stand directly in front of him. My stance was completely confrontational, and my hands were shaking in anger. His brown eyes looked menacing as he stared me down.
“I don’t know what kind of insecure little girl issues you have going on in your pretty little blond head, but my words were not directed at you. If I have something to say to you, I’d say it.”
Pretty? I glowered at him. “You know what?” I stopped to regain my composure. Taking a deep breath in through my nose, I closed my eyes and then reopened them. “Just forget this conversation ever happened. It’s obvious that you and I are incapable of being friends. I don’t want to live the next eleven months in a house with someone who is cruel and judgmental. So do me a favor. When you see me just pretend I’m not here. I’ll stay out of your way, if you stay out of mine.” I turned to march upstairs. Before I thought about it any longer, I flipped back around, my hair flying into my face. I was certain I looked like a mad woman. “And another thing, I’d really appreciate it if you’d stop bringing your stick figured, zero percent body fat, fake boob, airhead bimbos in my house. And yes, it’s also my house. I have a contract that says so.” Boom. Now I was done. He said nothing after my rant, and I stormed upstairs and slammed my bedroom door. Sitting on my air mattress, I tried to calm my breathing.
In the few minutes that passed, I tried swallowing down the large lump that was forming in my throat. I’d really gone off the deep end. I let my image issue get the best of me. But I had a feeling that it was more than just me picking a fight with him. From the time I moved in here, the air had been tense between us. The pressure was too much, and I was buckling. I truly enjoyed having my independence and living here despite my few run-ins with Camden. I couldn’t break now and say ‘screw it’ and move back in with my mom. I would make this work. I just wasn’t sure how I was going to feel around Camden after my little episode downstairs. And I hated the way he made me feel like I was under a microscope when he was in the same room with me. I knew that had to be mostly in my head, but I’d always put people like him up on a pedestal, which only served to make me feel bad about myself. That had to stop, right…now! He was a normal person, just like I was.
Now the other issue at hand was the draw I felt when he was near. It was more than just attraction. And that really pissed me off. I didn’t want to like him. He was very good looking, and that was just something that wasn’t going to change. But the air between was so electric it was almost tangible. Last night was something that shouldn’t have happened. I let him mess with my head. He was being nice, and he seemed to like to make me want him. Maybe he was one of those guys that got off on the idea that if a girl didn’t appear to be into him, he’d lure them in and feel attraction. Had he done it on purpose just to mess with me? I wasn’t sure I wanted an answer to that. For now I’d go back to my original game plan. I would ignore him when he was around, and I would do my own thing. Today I’d stay in my room and study for my A&P test later this week and maybe call Macie to see what she was up to.
I’d just gotten out of my history class when I heard a familiar voice behind me. I turned around, and Dodger was crossing the hall to get to me.
“Hey there Blue, whatcha doing? Just get out of class?”
I groaned. “Not you too. Care to tell me where that name came from? Your brother doesn’t seem so forthcoming.”
He barked a laugh. “It’s your eyes, Keegan. They’re the bluest I’ve seen, even compared to mine. It fits you.”
My eyes? That was where Camden got the nickname from? I shook my head refusing to think too much into it. “Well, I don’t think I care for it. Besides, isn’t that the nickname for the old guy on the movie Old School? You’re my boy Blue.” I did the worst impression of Will Ferrell.
Dodger was practically in stitches laughing at me. I tried to scowl at him, but honestly the air around him was light, and I couldn’t help the grin that stretched across my face. This was why I enjoyed being around him. He was always happy.
He wiped under his eye and stood up straight. “Didn’t know you were an impersonator. You got any more you can do?”
I nudged him with my arm as we started walking. “Shut up.”
“No seriously, that was great. You shoulda taken off your shirt and ran through the campus yelling it. Would’ve made it so much better.”
My face heated, and I knew I was red. He was still laughing as he slung his arm around my shoulder. “You’re unbelievable,” I scolded him.
“That’s what she said.” He wagged his eyebrows at me.
I sighed. He could go on all day, so I quit while I was ahead. I noticed a backpack hanging off his shoulder. “How did I not know you were a student here? I’m feeling like a crappy friend here.”
“The subject never came up. I’m in my third year, going for my physical therapy license.”
“Huh, I can see that,” I said, glancing up at him. “Would you work out of The Dugout?”
A sly smile spread across his face. “Camden tell you about it?” When I nodded but didn’t say anything else he continued, “I figured, why not? I wouldn’t have to open my own place, or find some doctor’s office to work out of. I’ll probably add on to the building so it seems more separate, and I can use the equipment in the gym for what my clients will need.”
I winked. “Sounds like you have a good plan.”
We walked silently and fairly slowly when he asked, “Where are we going?”
“Well I am going to the Bulldog Café. And you are more than welcome to join me. I always meet Macie for lunch.”
“Macie, huh? What’s her story anyway?”
I quirked my brow at him. “Why do you ask?”
He looked straight ahead and dropped his arm from my shoulder. “Just curious is all.”
“Uh huh. You are interested in her, aren’t you?” When he didn’t say anything I glanced up at him. “Mace is my best friend, and I love her to pieces, but she’s a bit of a player.” I stopped walking and pulled on his arm. “Listen, I get that you are probably into her, but I’m thinking it might be best if you stay away from that one. I hate talking about her like this, but I reall
y like you Dodger, and I don’t want to see either of you hurt.”
His emotions flittered across his face before he settled on a grin and teasingly said, “I’m not looking to marry the girl, I was just wondering.”
“If you say so, just please, be careful alright?”
He reached out and ruffled my hair, and I swatted at him. “You worry too much. Loosen up. Oh, speaking of, so there’s this party at one of the frat houses…”
I interrupted him with a gasp. “Oh my gosh I would have never pegged you for a frat guy.”
“Well if you would have listened to what I was saying I was getting to the part where I would have said one of my really good friends lives in the house that’s hosting it. It’s going to be a Halloween party so you’ll need to dress up, but it would be fun if you came. I could introduce you to some people, and it’ll give you a chance to get out and stretch your legs some.”
“Stretch my legs?” I giggled.
“Yes, stretch your legs.” His smile was beaming. “So far I’ve only seen you work, go to school, and hang out with your sister and Macie. Get out a bit, Keegan. There’s got to be a little she-devil hiding in there somewhere.” He squatted down so he was eye level to me and acted as though he were searching.
I blushed. “No, there’s not. And I don’t want to go to some frat Halloween party where I’m forced to dress like a slutty cop or a sexy nurse. It sounds like a nightmare stuffing me into spandex and something too short. I would look like a can of exploded dough.”
His face became stoic. “What in the hell are you talking about?”
“Seriously Dodger, I’m not blind. I know what I look like, and I make no qualms about what I see in the mirror. Squeezing into something that is only going to make me uncomfortable all night doesn’t sound like a good time.” I stopped talking when I saw him clenching his fists, and his mouth had formed a straight line. Tilting my head I said, “Did I say something wrong?”
He shook his head. “You really don’t see yourself clearly.”
“What?”
“You have a very distorted view, ‘cause what you’re seeing is not what I’m seeing. You’re not fat, or chubby, or whatever else you like to call yourself. You’re beautiful, Keegan. And before you argue with me, I’d like to believe that I’m a pretty good judge on what’s hot and what’s not. You, my friend, are smokin’.” His eyes ran the length of me while he gave me a wickedly handsome smile.
I felt like I wanted to go hide under a bush. I had no doubt my face was bright red, and I really wasn’t sure how to respond to his misguided compliment. “Ummm…thanks?”
“You say that like it’s a question.” He placed both of his hands up on my shoulders. “So you’re not one hundred pounds soaking wet and as tall as a skyscraper. You have something else that those girls don’t have.”
Now he’d piqued my curiosity. “And what would that be?”
“Tits and ass,” he said it with a casual shrug.
I laughed. “Maybe. But it’s just unfortunate that my curves also come along with a hefty spare tire.”
He glanced down at my stomach, and all I wanted to do was cover it up. “Once again, you’re seeing shit that just ain’t there. But now it seems I’m on a mission.”
“Oh God, should I be worried?”
“Definitely,” he chuckled. “I’m going to prove to you that you are a desirable woman. I can’t stand that you have such low self-esteem when you are a freaking ten on my hot meter. It must be fixed.”
I rolled my eyes. “Yeah, yeah. You’re barking up the wrong tree. But knock yourself out.”
“Why don’t you come to the gym with me tonight?”
I balked. “So your first order of business is to take away the curves that you say are attractive and turn me into one of those skinny chicks? No thanks, Dodger, I’m not interested.” I was turning to walk away.
He grabbed my forearm and stopped me. His baby blue eye searched mine. “You’re not hearing me. I’m not trying to change you, Keegan, I’m trying to help you. You think you look a certain way, when I don’t see anything wrong with it. My solution is to change the way you see yourself.” He looked genuinely unsure about whether he was reaching me.
A few seconds passed before I wiped under my eyes to rid the moisture and straightened my back. “Fine.” Dodger was truly not trying to hurt my feelings by saying what he did. “Come get me after six, I should be home from work by then.”
He nodded. “Aren’t I still coming to lunch with you?”
“No, I need a little bit of time alone with Macie, if that’s alright. I don’t mean to be rude.”
“Not rude at all. I’ll catch ya after work. Tell your friend I said hi.” And with that Dodger turned and walked toward the student parking.
I continued on to the café, ready to dump all of the swirling negativity on Macie’s lap. I wanted to get her take on everything. I really felt adamant about going to The Dugout and possibly running into Camden. He was at the forefront of my mind when Dodger mentioned taking me with him. If I went, it would feel like I was conceding to every word Camden said to me this weekend, and it ticked me off. I didn’t want him to think he got his way, and he somehow got his chubby roommate into the gym. I swear I could practically hear him laughing about it now while giving me an ‘I told you so’ face. I balled my fists until my nails were biting into my palms. Just the idea of it made me feel murderous. I knew Dodger wouldn’t let me back out. Little did Macie know, I was going to drag her along. At least she could act as a buffer while I was there. All of the guys would be paying attention to her instead of watching me huff and puff on the elliptical. I’d survive this. I promised I’d go with him tonight, but that didn’t mean every night after that. And one evening in the gym wasn’t going to change the way I saw myself. As I approached the café, I felt resolute that this was going to be a one-time deal. After that, Dodger would have to find a new way to show me how I should be seeing myself. I’d also be crossing my fingers that Camden had better things to do than be at work that late in the evening.
I’D JUST PULLED ON A PAIR of black yoga pants when I heard the front door open. Grabbing a rubber band to pull my long hair up, I bounded down the steps. Macie was sitting on the couch, reading some gossip magazine, looking cute as ever in her workout clothes and pristine makeup. Dodger was grabbing some water bottles from the fridge in the kitchen, glancing at Macie over his shoulder. I wasn’t sure how I felt about his interest in her, but that was a bridge I’d cross when I got to it.
“You ready?” Dodger asked, while zipping up a gym bag.
I shrugged. I truly had been dreading this all day, and I scolded myself for even agreeing to it. I’ve been to the gym before, but I was the type that went in once, felt self-conscious, and never went again. I was much more comfortable exercising in my own home, which of course I never did.
Macie stood up from the couch, and I couldn’t help but admire her confidence in this moment. She wasn’t agonizing over how she looked. She didn’t have to. Her long lean legs were perfectly proportionate to the rest of her body. She was wearing a pair of short black spandex shorts with a hot pink, skin tight tank top. Her brown hair was up in a messy ponytail that she pulled off flawlessly. Her body was incredible, and I almost hated her for it. I glanced down at my own body and sighed. Besides my yoga pants, I had on a yellow sports bra with a white tank top over it. I’ve never left the house wearing tighter clothing. What I was comfortable in was usually somewhat baggy around my middle. Wearing this was completely out of my norm. I was worried people were going to hone in on my lumpy stomach. I wanted to dart back upstairs and change into a baggy t-shirt, but Dodger seemed to read my mind and shook his head at me.
“No way are you changing. Besides, the gym isn’t the place for a fucking beauty pageant. You’re perfect, let’s go.” He hefted the bag up over his shoulder and held the door open for Macie and me.
The drive to The Dugout was okay. Dodger and Macie were chatting in the
front about music and school schedules. Macie seemed just as interested in him as he was her. The music in the car was loud enough that they had to speak over it to hear each other. I tuned them out and watched the scenery pass by. Because we were still close to campus, the buildings were well kept, and the surrounding neighborhoods were manicured. I loved this area of Athens. It was very much part of the city but still had a country feel. Plus if you ever tired of the hustle and bustle it wasn’t much of a drive before you were looking at cow pastures instead of concrete. I closed my eyes and let the bass of the music soothe me. Before I knew it, we were pulling into a parking lot, and Dodger had turned around, looking at me.
“You fall asleep, Blue?”
I rolled my eyes. “No, I was just…meditating. And stop calling me that, it’s annoying.”
He smirked before he got out of the car, and Macie followed behind him. I’d never been given a nickname before, but that particular one really grated my nerves. I knew why, too. Looking around at the parked cars, I tried to find Camden’s Mustang, but I didn’t see it. I released a breath I hadn’t realized I’d been holding. My body automatically released some tension, and I got out of the backseat. Dodger and Macie were waiting for me by the front door.
“When we get in here, there’s a women’s locker room off to the left. You can go check it out or use the restroom if you need to before we start. I’m going to use tonight for demonstrating and making sure you know how to use the machines and weights. Good?”
Ugh! Why was he always so happy? “I don’t even know why you’re bothering with this. I’m going to be here once. You’re better off putting me on a treadmill and training Macie.”
His lip curled. “You’re not getting out of this. And I’m not putting you on the treadmill. Well, at least not for the whole time we are here. I want to show you that the gym isn’t a scary place where people are here to judge you. Okay?”
