by D. L. Wu
The reality of their precarious situation was still there, looming over them. It would be their last day together, his last full day of freedom. It was something neither could ignore.
Never-the-less, they relished their time together and spent the day hiking, eating, and enjoying the scenery, the wildlife, and the powerful allure of Mother Nature. They took a swim in the motel's pool in their skivvies around midnight. The moment was a grand finale, full of tenderness and affection for one another that went on throughout the night.
***
The next morning found them tucked into her car, a melancholy air surrounding them as they drove through the deserts of California. Throughout the entire journey, Jaime’s hand was pressed tightly against Evan's thigh.
It was almost six o'clock that night when they arrived near LAX. She could sense Evan's anxiety as he drove closer to the airport. She trembled in her seat beside him, glancing at him often. His nervousness increased as they neared the airport's entrance.
A vehicle checkpoint lay ahead. Most of the cars were waved through without their needing to stop. She prayed that they wouldn't be pulled over, allowing her to have a little more time with him. He had explained to her earlier how they would accomplish their current task, hopefully without incident. He’d beseeched her to follow the plan to the letter. She’d promised she would, but as their time to part ways drew closer, her heart beat erratically within her chest.
They held their breaths as they neared the checkpoint. Two police officers stood beside their cruisers on either side of the road. Jaime bit her lip. Evan took a deep breath. They released a deep sigh of relief as they were waved forward. Evan pulled into the large parking garage that was housed in the center of LAX. Once safely parked, he stared at her intently.
Tears overwhelmed her once more. “I love you so much, Evan,” she gasped as if she feared it would be the last time she would be able to say it to him, the last time she would see him.
“I love you, Jaime,” he whispered.
Amazement and happiness tumbled through her. She realized that it was the first time he had actually said the words. Her heartbeat quickened with both excitement and heavy sorrow.
“I love you,” he repeated.
He pulled her within his arms in a tight embrace as she began to sob. He broke down in tears, too. His weeping only made hers more intense. She held onto him, refusing to let go.
“I can't do it!” she cried. “I can't leave you!”
“You have to! You promised me!”
She pulled away momentarily, tears streaming down her cheeks. With defeat, she nodded. “I promised you . . .”
“Come on, then,” he said with fortitude and opened his car door.
Yet she wasn’t quite ready to step outside of the car. She was so overwhelmed with misery that she found she couldn't move. He hurried about the car to yank her door open. He held his hand out to her, yet she was unable to take it. Instead, she clasped her hands against her mouth and cried.
He leaned forward and gently urged her out of the car. “Jaime, come on,” Evan said with as much patience as he could muster. “We'll just walk very calmly and quietly into the terminal now, just like we planned. Come on.”
Her weeping intensified. Evan grabbed a hold of her arm and pulled her limp body out of the car.
“I can't do it!” she sniffled. “I can't do it! Let's just drive away, Evan. Let's just run away!”
“I’ve already explained this to you,” he whispered as he leaned close, his lips brushing against her ear.
Impatience threaded his words as he tightened his hold upon her upper arm. He found that he had to drag her away from the car. She allowed him to pull her along, unable to fight him. She felt helpless, her sobs increasing as they moved toward the airport.
“You’ve already promised me!” he reminded her sharply.
Little did she know, her agitated state was arousing extreme suspicion amongst those they came across as he guided her through the parking garage.
“Just a few years, I promise you,” he beseeched as he became cognizant of the glances turning in their direction throughout the busy airport garage. “I'll sort this out and I'll come back for you!”
She couldn't control her weeping or her anxiety any longer as Evan pulled her across a congested street and into the terminal. Suddenly, she no longer doubted that the events of that day would soon haunt her for the rest of her life.
Evan's heart raced as he saw several security guards speak frantically into their walkie-talkies. The sound of a police siren cut through the cacophony of noises outside. People were being shuffled out of harm's way and a few screams could be heard reverberating throughout the terminal.
Evan knew the end was near. The realization of the situation at hand finally penetrated Jaime’s clouded mind. She cried out with fright, taking the blame for the scene that was now unfolding before her. Her crying stopped abruptly and her heart pounded in panic. She clutched Evan tightly as a veritable army made up of security guards and policemen surrounded them.
“Let go of her!” one of the policemen demanded.
Evan found that he couldn’t do so. He knew it was the end of the line for him. This time, though, there was no escape for him as there had been in the past. There would be no talking their way out of it like Jaime had done for him several times before. Despite everything, Evan needed a few more minutes with her. He couldn't let it end like this.
He pressed his lips against Jaime's ear and whispered apologetically, “Forgive me for what I'm about to do, my Darlin’!”
He whipped his gun out from under his jacket and shoved the barrel against the side of Jaime's head. She released a terrified squeal as he did so. More than a dozen police officers drew their guns on him at the same time.
“Back off, or I'll do it!” Evan screamed.
It was then that all hell broke loose. People ran in every direction as the police tried to rationalize with him. “Drop the gun! Don't hurt her!”
Evan could hear the swirling resonance of the commands they yelled at him, but nothing got through. Jaime gasped with apprehension as she felt Evan drag her back toward a wall behind a check-in counter that was currently deserted. The people servicing it had been cleared out because of the commotion.
He pulled her down quickly behind the desk. The look of fright upon her face broke his heart. Tears stained her cheeks, but never once did she look away from him.
“Do it fast,” she begged, clutching his arms with both hands. “Don't let it hurt!”
He sniffed repeatedly and rubbed at the tears streaming down his cheeks with his free hand. “I'm not gonna kill you, my love. How could you even think that I would do that to you?” He took a deep breath in hopes of regaining his composure. “I just needed more time to tell you . . . to make sure that you understand!”
“I understand!” she wept. “But it didn't have to end like this. We could've run forever. I would've run with you forever! Why didn't you listen to me for a change? Why did you have to do this? I'll never see you again! I – I'll never have you now!”
He shook his head, his shoulders slumping with defeat. “No. You will see me again, because I made a promise to you,” he said reassuringly and reached out to wrap his fingers around the necklace that hung around her neck. He held it within his fist for but a moment. “This promise means that I'll be back for you. I won't break it!”
“But anything could happen . . .” she moaned.
Evan wiped away his tears with conviction. Through the sound of the commotion that surrounded them, he could hear the police shouting through megaphones in hopes of gaining his acquiescence. “Lots of things will happen,” he agreed, “but you must be strong! Through all of this, you have to be strong . . . for me. Promise me!”
Her eyes never left his as she nodded. “For you . . . I'd do anything!”
He curled his hands about her cheeks, his tender touch stirring the tendrils of her heart. “I'll be back for you, trust me!�
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She reached out to clasp his face between her hands, needing that one moment of closeness between them before their lives were changed forever. “I trust you.”
Evan pressed his mouth against hers in one final long, wet, and hard kiss. “Always remember!” he urged her once the kiss ended. “I'll love you for all eternity, my Jaime!”
With that declaration, he quickly pulled himself out of her embrace and ran out into the open. Jaime’s screams rang out throughout the terminal as she heard the loud resonance of a gunshot. She stood there, frozen in place, and watched as Evan's gun hit the ground and slid toward her. He fell to the ground nearby. Without hesitation, she threw herself against him, screaming and weeping hysterically as she wrapped her body protectively around his. The police surrounded them, their guns held aloft in their direction.
“Step away from him, Ma'am!” one of the policemen ordered.
She clung tightly to Evan, refusing to obey. She buried her face against his neck, her heart constricting painfully as she heard the soft coughing and gurgling sounds that spilled from his lips. Pulling back slightly, she saw a trickle of blood pouring down his chin.
“Oh my God!” she wailed. “Oh my God! Evan, please don't leave me!” Screams and moans like that of a wounded animal were rent from her as she held onto him. “You promised you'd come back to me! You promised me!”
A policeman aimed his gun at Jaime. “Step away from him now!” he ordered.
She refused to listen and pressed her head back down upon Evan's still warm body. She held onto him as her life depended on it. Yet she didn’t remain in that position for long. She was soon violently dragged away from him by a policewoman.
She started screaming again when she caught sight of a group of officers as they surrounded Evan’s body as if they were vultures swarming down upon an animal’s carcass. A couple of policemen were searching him for additional weapons. Another one pulled his limp arms down and handcuffed him.
An ambulance stretcher was rushed to Evan's side. She trembled fearfully as the policewoman held her back. Several EMT’s crowded about his body as they took his vital signs and prepared his body for transport. She pressed a shaking hand against the curve of her throat as she watched four attendants lift Evan's lifeless body onto the stretcher.
“I love you, Evan!” she cried out passionately as the stretcher was wheeled away, though she knew he couldn't hear her anymore.
EPILOGUE
Eighteen months later
Jaime felt daunted by the idea of attending the prestigious Ivy League University of Pennsylvania and often wondered how she’d gotten accepted in the first place. Surely, it must have been a mistake. After all, it had been a very traumatic time for her over the last year and a half. Never-the-less, she had received admission into the Biomedical Science program and had started last September.
As she walked across the cold, rainy campus on that March afternoon, she was suddenly reminded of the fact that it was her nineteenth birthday, not that she celebrated her birthdays anymore. They were quite joyless now. Yet her saving grace was the fact that in just three months, there would be a happy birthday to celebrate, that of her sweet son, Evan Jr.'s first birthday.
She couldn't wait until little Evan was old enough to understand things a little better. She would tell him all about his brave and handsome father someday. She had only known her son's father for ten short days, but she felt that she had lived an entire lifetime with Evan Baedeker.
Of course, for months after his death, it had felt as if her world had literally come to an end. But she had promised him, after all, that she would be strong. Now that Evan had given her the greatest gift of all, their beautiful son to raise, she knew she had to make the effort to carry on for both Evan and their child. She had to make a good living and give their son the best life that she possibly could. So she tried to study hard and persevere, for her child and for the memory of her beloved lover. Yet, at times, it was so very difficult to do.
After picking Evan Jr. up at the University daycare, she loaded him into his car seat in the back of the new car her uncle had purchased for her several months ago. Sometimes, she wondered as to what had happened to her blue Acura, the car she’d left abandoned at the airport in Los Angeles.
That day still haunted her. She still blamed herself for what had happened to Evan. It was the hardest thing she dealt with, the overwhelming guilt she harbored over his police shooting. She realized it had been her fault that Evan had been shot and killed by the police in that confrontation.
Why had she broken down? Why had she called attention to themselves because of it? He would have gotten away if she hadn't. He would have gotten arrested quietly and without a fuss. He could have attempted the plea bargaining he’d thought of making. He might have been back for her by now. Yet because of her fleeting, but childish and careless, exhibition when she’d lost control, she’d lost everything. She had forsaken the only true love she would ever be destined to have and had thus robbed her son of his father.
Months and months of therapy had not eased her suffering in the least. Dealing with the guilt over Evan's death and the mistreatment that she endured from fellow students during her pregnancy made every moment of her life unbearable. Despite the joy that Evan Jr. brought her, life wasn't getting any easier for her.
She thought of Evan every waking moment. She dreamt about him every single night. He consumed her life completely. His dramatic murder by the police played over and over within her head every day. Never was there a day that she wasn’t thinking about it. Day after day, she agonized over it. In the back of her mind, she knew there was no hope for her to do well in school. It was hard to concentrate on the tasks at hand. It was even hard for her to take care of her son.
How she got accepted to the esteemed UPenn was a true mystery to her. Yes, her academic father had gone there, but did she really deserve going to school there? Deep inside, she didn’t feel worthy.
She continued her weekly therapy sessions in order to attempt getting back the tools she needed to deal with the loss and guilt she felt so severely. Yet, it seemed so hopeless. She feared she was slowly losing it and felt that she would soon have no other way of dealing with her guilt and depression.
But I promised Evan! she would continuously remind herself when all seemed lost. I promised him I would be strong!
Yet it did nothing to quell the pain she felt inside. Every moment of every day, she remembered. Never once did she forget what he meant to her. Never once did she let go of the love she knew she could never give him. Hers was a love that had grown out of a desperate situation. A love that had given her the one thing that would always remind her of the man who’d given his life in hopes of saving hers in the process, a little boy that would forever be her pride and joy.
***
Since it was her birthday, she decided that she didn't really relish the idea of going home to her lonely apartment. Her aunt and uncle had invited her to dinner, but she’d politely declined, telling them she just wanted to spend the evening with her son. Yet she needed a little pick me up and felt compelled to visit a very special place.
After parking the car in front of the ice cream parlor, she held her nine-month-old boy within her arms and gazed at the parlor with melancholy. It used to have good memories associated with it. A fleeting memory of her and her father laughing over a shared cherry float as they talked about his adventures all over the North-East when he traveled for business surfaced. Yet now the place had a bittersweet memory tied to it that obsessed her greatly. The memory of meeting Evan for the very first time was one she remembered at every given moment.
Tears filled her eyes as she walked into the establishment with her son cradled within her arms. She ordered for the both of them, overjoyed to spend the time with her little boy. An untouched cherry float sat in front of her as she placed a small dish of vanilla ice cream on the high chair tray before her happy, brown-haired son. She talked to him cheerfully and then pl
aced a small spoon within his hand in order to prompt him to use it to feed himself some of the sweet treat. He tossed the spoon aside and curled a mound of ice cream within his tiny fists instead.
She managed a small, proud laugh for her adorable son as she brushed back a long lock of her own light blonde hair that had escaped from her ponytail. While Evan Jr. gave her immeasurable joy, it was the memory of his father that often robbed her of that happiness. She missed him terribly and wanted him back, then and there.
There was not much more hope left within her soul. Her mind soon seemed to wander again as it often did. Sometimes, she felt as if she was on another plane of reality. She could hear her son's happy cries and coos, but it sounded ever so faintly to her.
Jaime's heart leapt to her throat when she heard the most wonderful sound in the entire world fill her head. It had to be her imagination, a breathtaking remembrance of a cherished vision of the past within her mind. The sound lilted as if floating upon a leaf in a gentle breeze.
“Do you think you might be able to help me?” a beautiful, deep British male voice said.
Her breath left her entire body. A slew of memories bombarded her as she heard the words. They were the exact words her dear, sweet lost love had spoken to her so long ago. How was it that she was hearing them, then and there?
She looked up with a jolting and momentary fear. A vision of beauty was standing in front of her table, except this time, he looked whole. This time, he didn't have an ugly, bloody gash across his forehead, nor did he possess a shock of dirty hair or ripped clothes.
Was she seeing an angel? Evan had been shot during that police encounter. How could she be seeing him standing in front of her now? The incredibly handsome vision gave her one of Evan's menacingly flirty smiles followed by his signature faint-inducing wink.
Jaime gasped aloud as she felt herself hyperventilate. “Evan?” she squealed with confusion and wonder.
